All Aboard The Keepers Tour: Latest Update
It’s so close I can almost taste it. The mud. The dust. The heavy Spring air, turning to rain, blown across the fields of Flanders, where many a battle has been fought, in trenches and on wheels. Battles fought against other men, battles fought within each man. My own mind is in battle; am I worthy? Will I be prepared for the beating my body will take, and will my mind deal with it? Well, I’m not going to my own grave without doing this. I will survive on V.
The Keepers Tour just gets better and better. The team at Pavé Cycling Tours should be known as the Mailmen of Flanders, because they just keep on delivering. It seems almost every day there’s an email informing us of an addition to the tour, and our responses are more and more ‘screaming teenager’ than composed adult. To say we’re excited about this trip could be the understatement of the year. We’re excited.
The latest gems from Alex and William include;
- Meeting the legendary Freddy Maertens at the Flanders Museum in Oudenaarde.
- Meeting Vincent Lavenau and the Ag2R team and mechanics at their motel on the Friday before Roubaix.
- A private opening of the Casa Grinta restaurant, with what is described as one of the most ‘insane’ collections of cycling jerseys in the world, plus ‘Belgian Fusion’ food.
- Riding into the Roubaix velodrome after our day in Hell, and cleansing in the iconic showers. (TBC)
- A musette from Pavé’s partner Ravito, stuffed with cycling badges and a cap. (In addition to the special V Musette from us containing a V-Pint and special V-Shirt, not available for sale elsewhere.)
- A possible showdown with Cycling Tips blog’s own Tour, with some cool prizes up for grabs, along with a ton of laughs.
- A Cogal to be held in conjunction with our ride of the Ronde parcours on the Saturday before Roubaix.
Of course, this is all in addition to the already confirmed awesomeness of riding with The Lion of Flanders Johan Museeuw, touring the Eddy Merckx factory, riding on the Gent velodrome, touring the Brunehaut brewery (where our organic Malteni beer is produced) and another cycling museum visit in Beveren. There’s a heap of other activities confirmed too, so email us for the full presentation.
And the best part? All of this is included in the super low price! Everything. All meals, all accommodation, all drinks (yes, beer!) and hanging out with a cool bunch of like-minded bike nuts.
Sell your first-born if you have to, but don’t miss out on a week, or weekend of pure Classics bliss. There are still a few seats available, so book yours now.
@mcsqueak
I don’t know. Seems they are not open to traffic, certainly. But you can’t keep a bike out. And the Pavé folks have wicked connections – have you looked at the PDF schedule? This isn’t for mortals. WTF. Seriously. WTF.
From what I see, the ScTdF is sketchy on the quality of the cobbles for Race Conditions. Shouldn’t impact our much slower and less informed selves from riding them.
@frank
I’m with you
Rules are there to be broken – well everyone else’s rules obviously, not ours
@frank
Of course we’re with you. While I was pretty sure that the answer would be that we carry on regardless surely you can’t be surprised if people get slightly emotional at such things. My fuck is settled down.
I will do my best not to burst into flames, though.
@frank
In these times of mass produced junk and consumerism for the sake of consumerism, you’ve got to love something so unashamedly low key as those FMB’s. Can’t wait to see those on the Nemesises.
@Dr C
I believe that’s what we call “narcissism”, so – yes.
@Chris
Seriously. My favorite bit is the guys got all in a tizzy because they had to order them before he – YES HE – not some bigass company – has to fulfill his Pro orders for the classics.
I think Francois goes to South America and sucks the rubber out the trees by the mouthful and carries them back to France that way. That would explain the cost, anyway.
@Frank
I’m with you too. To Arenberg and beyond!
Blocked roads, pah
Where there is a will
I have some mates who I’ll bring along to inblock the route
in France some of the roads are closed all year long except 2 days, like the Trouée. Most of them are open, but only farmers use them. so there will be almost no traffic while riding the pavé. In Vlaanderen, the cobble stone roads are always open, because people live along these roads. The Kapelmuur is closed for cars, but not for bikes. Belgian government is fearing demonstrations, riots, violence, arson, occupation of the hill by protesters…
If you want to look ‘pro’ on the Muur, you can do this:
but I prefer this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_vq7LbOHZbs&feature=autoplay&list=PLFC4A09194605A0B0&lf=results_main&playnext=2
damn, wrong clip, it s this one:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5EoJ66sNkog
@JC Belgium
Shit, check out those guns, too. Now, if he was popping a wheelie like the other guy, then you’re onto something.
I’ve found a 200m (nearly) stretch of cobbles in east london. Very tempted to go out and run intervals on it at the weekend.
Getting nervous. Need miles. May have bought a completely irrelevant frame today to distract myself from the absence of proper preparation.
@Chris – 110 rpm, sur la plaque is midway between distant memory and much cherised ideal over here at the moment…at least I can say I won’t peak too soon….;)
@Joe
Hit 111rpm in 50 x 11 last night on the rollers. Briefly. It was more a question of being able to stay stable and smooth at that point than anything else.
I will peak in about two months but like you I do need miles.
@Chris
Strong work. I’m friggin hopeless on rollers, it’s probably time I gave them another go.
I worry that I’ve left it too late – trapped in a dastardly compromise, not quite there on the bike and having neglected beer drinking enough while training to have a deleterious effect on my form at the bar also. Doubly delirious indeedy.
Might dust off the turbo for some post pint intervals on Friday night. I’ve felt terrible like that before. ‘Enhanced’ training…it might just work.
@Chris
The plural of “Nemesis” is “Nemesii.”
@Nate
Sorry but it’s not… it’s nemeses.
Chris was half right.
Nemesis is originally from Greek not Latin.
She was the goddess of retribution.
@ChrisO
I defer to your superior pedantry.
@ChrisO
some day I’m going to call your bluff on all this medievil greco-roman linguistic stuff – meantime I’m hopelessly out of my depth so I’ll keep my powder dry
@ChrisO
That’s what I was going for, honest. It’s my slow typing, by the time I get to typing a word at the back end of the sentence, my mind will have moved on.
@mcsqueak
When I was living in Flanders, the race hallowed routes weren’t super well marked. Long rainy training rides with the Michelin map was about it. Directions from the team help got me more lost more often than not. Team recon training rides for races wasn’t really done. The Kapelmuur I included on regular rides as the lead in through Geraardsbergen reminded me of a ride I did when visiting family in Oregon. I guess everywhere one goes reminds them of somewhere else? It was a ton of fun finding tiny cobbled roads and climbs to break the monotony of training rides and to get away from the canals. So many more little roads than just whats in the Classics. The cobbles weren’t real practical for regular training but rather for the novelty of having been over them. In the races, approaching those hills or sections was so much faster and changed the way they were ridden. Training over them mostly just helped my wheel truing skills. If you get the chance, try the Kemmelberg. Going down that at speed…in the rain set my standard for full pucker. It’s where Tscmil’s career ended unfortunately. A cold hard truth falling on that descent!
@Dr C
That’s rich coming from a doctor ! Anyone else falls off their bike they get a bruise, but you would have a subcutaneous haematoma
@jimmy
just out of interest: where were you living in Flanders? you mention Kemmelberg, so I suspect somewhere in West-Flanders?
@JC Belgium
Ghent, Ichtegem, then Kortrijk. Would love to go back and see all the things I missed someday. Take my kid at an age where that exposure might have a profound influence.
@jimmy
You’re an asshole. But you should absolutely take your kid. My cycling trips as a youngster fundamentally formed the way I learned to love cycling.
@frank
Frank, thanks? I am curious of your upbringing given the references to your dad and his love of cycling. Others too who have successfully passed the love on to their kids. So many cyclists I know found it through escapism not as a relationship builder. My motivation back then certainly wasn’t to get warm and fuzzy with the old man.
@jimmy
Ha! I was calling you an asshole for having lived in Flanders…sarcasm doesn’t digitize well. Yeah – it was a great relationship builder. But not just with my dad. Most of my closest relationships were built on the bike. Suffering together brings people close.
I reckon the Keepers Tour attendees and I will all be thick as thieves…
@jimmy
Huh, cool! Thanks for the explanation. Yeah, I guess I could see those routes as less ideal for regular training, but more for the novelty of them.
@frank
Man, when I was in boy scouts we did the cycling merit badge: 5x 25 mile rides, and 1x 50 mile ride.
My dad did those with me, but he was on his Schwinn 5sp road bike (which is what got me into cycling, about three years ago now, after I inherited it after he passed away), meanwhile I was on a department store mountain bike with knobby wheels! I was also wearing normal basketball shorts and a tshirt. This was when I was in middle school.
I have very vivid memories of those rides sucking very, very hard. Sort of explains why I wasn’t much into cycling for the next 10+ years. However I did get the merit badge, and won the award for “most improved rider”. I think Cyclops may have given me the very some award after the Whidbey cogal.
@jimmy
“Training over them mostly just helped my wheel truing skills. If you get the chance, try the Kemmelberg. Going down that at speed…in the rain set my standard for full pucker”
Classic +1.
@frank
I went on my university elective to South Africa with an old friend (and ex-girlfriend) who was a) gorgeous and b) half-Flemish. We got a lift out to this braai (BBQ) on a beach with all these South African blokes. They were nattering away in Afrikaans about whether or not this girl and I were together or not and whether they should have a crack at her later on. She waited until we were getting out of the bus before thanking the driver at length in Flemish. These guys nearly died – apparently the two languages are extremely close and she’d understood nearly every word. None of them got near her. Neither did I…
Also, am I the only one here who thought FMBs were an article of footwear worn by promiscuous women?
@heinous
“Also, am I the only one here who thought FMBs were an article of footwear worn by promiscuous women?”
No you aren’t. All kiwis think the same thing.
@heinous
@Bianchi Denti
Canucks too! When I met my now wife she was wearing a lovely pair of FMBs!
@heinous
Awesome story – Flemish/Dutch are pretty much the same, and Afrikaans is a weirdo combination of Dutch and who-knows-what. She’d definitely understand it well enough to know what they wanted, but I’m also guessing they weren’t the most clever/subtle blokes. Chances are it didn’t require much language skills to work it out!
@heinous, @Bianchi Denti
??? FMB’s?
@heinous
With a name like that I con’t imagine why?
@Mikel Pearce
I’m reading that as she had fancy, fancy tires on her bike. I need a new hobby.
@frank
Really? F me boots, generally like tnee high leather boots with heels.
Bretto told me. Apparently.
@jimmy
I can imagine which city you liked the most…
What a coincidence, my hometown is some 15km from Kortrijk (along the canal Leie, towards Ghent), and I study in Ghent now. but what really would be ‘Dude, no way!’: if you were one of the cyclists who were living down the street of my flat in Bijlokevest street, Ghent. (I think 2 years ago)
oh, I almost forgot: take your kid to Belgium when he s 16, then he is officially allowed to drink beer.
@JC Belgium
All 3 places had their charms, but I imagined being in Kortrijk more long term. But all things must end. Was a bit more than 2 years ago…think Museeuw pre-world champion bands. The drinking age tip is gold, thanks!
Watched some good attacks last year, but for sheer brutality this gets my vote for dishing the V in excessive quantity
Badass on the Bosberg
@Dr C
It’s certainly not pretty pedalling!
@Dr C
Do my eyes deceive me, or is he big-ringing it?
I think there’s something in this for all of us.
@Bianchi Denti
Awesome article, wonder if Fast Eddy frequents this site. Character might not be measurable, but it can be categorised Anti-V, Nil-V or V-Neutral, V and Morest Biggerer V.
@Chris
we will do well to remember this at 100Km done and 80 to go, when the pain sets in – we can’t pay cash for the completion of our challenge…..
@Dr C
Are we doing 180k now?!
We can pay cash for a fat belgian bloke on a derny
@Chris
That could well become the lexicon definition of anti-V!
@Dr C
These European units confuse me, isn’t it about the same distance as Bordeaux – Paris and the pros used to get pacers for some of that? (Bordeaux and Roubaix are both on the edges of Europe and Paris is obviously the middle)
Bordeaux in in the south of France, and Paris is much closer to the north of France and the Belgian border where Roubaix is. BP was around 600km, and Paris-Roubaix is “only” about 260km.
@Oli
Thanks Oli.
@Chris
How terribly Francophile of you – are you sure you are not actually a Frenchman masquerading as a English Country Gentleman?
The P-R is 288km I believe, and the first 100km is cobble free smooth tarmac, the last 188km isn’t
I have volunteered Fronk and @ChrisO to do the full run – so they will do overnight circadian clock confusion thingy, arriving Lille at Belgian Beer O’clock, then instead of pyjamas and a good book/boke, it’ll be lycra and a bus trip to the start line near Paris (can’t be arsed to look up the name of the start village, Campeigne or summink, no respect at all…) – meanwhile I, and I strongly suspect you, will be having a good snore, followed by a hearty breakfast at not too stupid o’clock and off to the 100km mark, to suck their wheels to Roubaix as the yawn past us at 35kph
Seem like a plan??
@Dr C
Ce n’est pas bon! I’m afraid I’m most certainly not a Frenchman and if I’m an Englishman it would seem that I’m a poorly educated one at best! All roads lead to Paris but it would appear that some are longer than others and Paris is not at the centre of the known universe.
I’m sure @Fronk and @ChrisO will be deighted to be nominated as pathfinders but I’m not convinced that we should give them the chance to loosen their guns before we join them.
There are a couple of things that I’m not sure about though:
(a) what is a boke? Internet research tells me it’s a form of Mongolian wrestling or “street” round your parts for vomiting. We haven’t been issued with an list of essential equipment or clothing yet but should I be bring a Borat mankini thing or a bowl?
(b) correct me if I’m wrong but we’re staying in a B&B on the continent which means that we’ll most likely be dipping flacid pastries into bowls of milk coffee for breakfast. Hearty, in the form of a full English (or Irish) it will not be.
@Chris
Street only bro
I was kind of hoping Fronk and ChrisO’s natural competitiveness, and combined overexcitement, will result in them yahoo firing off all their rounds before they reach us, so they will be in reload mode by the time they reach us at base camp – either way we will need a proper breakfast to prepare us indeed – I worry they will not have the frites on at 7am
Perhaps we should import some unhealthy fat and bone-scraping filled pig intestines, eggs, sliced serum and blood clots, and a bottle of cholesterol to incinerate them in, to warm our finely tuned howitzers in preparation for the scouts arrival?