Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: Barracuda

Order: Level 1 Velominatus

Location: Fleurieu Peninsula - South Australia

Self diagnosed Jack of all trades and master of None.... Champagne tastes but a beer budget .... Dreams of a trip to Roubaix ..... reality is a trip to gravel road on outskirts of town.

@Barracuda's activity:

We’re into day four of the Six Days of the Giro series, let’s talk trash. Yes the Tour de France started a few years before the Giro and has always been credited as The Tour to win. You win the Giro, you are a stud. Win the Tour and you are a stud for life. Why is that? Is the Tour longer, tougher, more murderous, more beautiful? In the 20...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. The Giro, by a long way ! Looking from a far in my airconditioned office in Oz, the Giro has that air of mystery and legend.  The Tifosi and the rampant nature of the racing appears much more adhoc than the Tour. The Tour “feels” more contrived and cont… »

Day 5 of the Six Days of the Giro continues with an impromptu VSP event.Lets have a look at where we are in the 2013 Giro. Wiggins must have spent time training in Luxembourg because he’s been descending like a Schleck when things get dodgy before disappearing into the team van to have a cry about it. Hesjedal has put in some good moves and...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Nibali 2. Evans 3. Wiggins 4. Santambrogio 5. Henao »

Change creeps in slowly, it has a way of taking the seemingly immutable and eroding it over time. It’s inevitable; if the great canyons were carved from the solid rock of Mount Velomis by such a soft thing as water, then it should come as no surprise that the Velominati V-Kit would also change with time. As David St. Hubbins says, “Th...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Oooooh , thats nice, whats the damage on the new kit ?   Or are the The gear prices updated with old photos? Was tossing up more Rapha but, me thinks im liking the new stuff here also,  mmmmm,  ouch »

We are the Keepers of the Cog.  In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers And Sagan’s mother, by the looks on the riders faces ! »

  2. @Benno Move along, nothing to see here, these are not the “rules” you are looking for. »

La Vie Velominatus. It is the life we, as Velominati, lead.  It is life as a disciple of cycling, of the greater meaning the bike holds and the lessons it teaches us. Along the path, one of our great duties is the wholesale consumption of the great Works related to our sport. From periodicals to books to films, herin lies the list of works consi...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Just finished reading David Walsh’s book about Mr Armstrong – captivating read and well written, wanted to put it down because didnt like what I was reading but found myself turning to the next page, and the next and the next etc. Two enthusiastic thumbs… »

While the Northern Hemisphere Velominati were busy arguing about who injected what in the old races they’d been using to distract themselves during their indoor torture sessions, down South a bunch of like minded strangers from the internet decided that coffee, hills, sunshine & beer seemed like a great excuse to meet up for a ride̷...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Daccordi Rider   given I was unable to make it on the day, what a great report this is ! However your quoted as saying ” At the top we turned right , as the pros will do next Saturday and tracked across the top of the Range ” Pardon my smart arse natur… »

I’ve been lucky enough to do quite a bit of travelling in my life. As a family, we travelled all over Europe when I was just a lad, and recently I’ve had the opportunity to visit more exotic places like India and Hawaii. What I’ve learned from my travels is that the key to a great experience is to leave your predispositions on t...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Dan_R Yes »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @frank Ahhh, good old insurance. Yep @frank, its true, a relative of mine turfed a bike off back of car whilst doing substantial kms/h and claimed a replacement under House and contents insurance. We are a gifted bunch here in Oz. »

  2. #1 getting some new hoops this week,   couldnt see the VMH coming at a set of @Dan_R ‘s volcano destroying carbones so Ive gone for a set of Shimano C24′s. Too late to discuss as the “trigger has been pulled” on the order but any opinions from the V fold… »

Gent (Deinze)-Wevelgem, it starts with 130 km of cruising around Belgium and Northern France followed by a flurry of bergs and then a final 38 km of  flatter riding to the inevitable sprint finish. How hard can the climbing be if Super Mario got over them? Ask the riders from KT 2012, (the ones not in the following car) and they will tell you...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. BOONEN 2. BAK 3. EISEL 4. GILBERT 5. SAGEN »

Wellington isn’t renown for its great summers; a mate is always quick to remind me that if the weather was perfect all the time, everyone would want to live here and we’d be overrun by Aucklanders (just like Aussies but not quite dumb enough to live in Canberra). As our summer goes into its last death throes of amazingly calm, sunny, cl...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @frank My brain now hurts and my ears are bleeding »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Gianni I also get all bike stuff sent to work under the cover of darkness, that way, when worn or used for the first time and the inevitable question is asked, like, “when did you fucking get that ?”  the standard response is, “ive had it for ages, y… »

If I spent half a summer riding with one hand on the tops and one on the hoods, I spent the other half riding with each hand deliberately gripping the hoods differently. As any young Cyclist growing up in the United States in the late 80s, I had a major thing for Greg LeMond.I imagined Greg to be the perfect Cyclist, as youth often does of their...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Well, now you mention it @frank, there are quite alot of “positions” one can take – on the bike that is. The personal favourite is the ” hand V”   i.e.  thumb on back of hoods and 4 fingers casually and deliberately caressing the levers but applying no p… »

Finally, we have Milan-Sanremo. I hope pedale.forcetta is ready to shoot some pictures, especially black and white because it will be cold and possibly wet. Throw in a little wind and a race of this distance will weed out the less hardy. Recently, but not too recently, this race would be won out of a decent size field sprint. And yet, besides Fabs...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Sagan 2. Fab Canc 3. Gerrans 4. Big Phil Gilbert 5. EBH »

The Prophet was very clear on how best to ride an individual Time Trial; start as fast as possible and finish as fast as possible. As for the middle, his advice was to ride that as fast as possible.The same can be said of climbing; as we covered in Part I and Part II of the Sur La Plaque series, the key to climbing well is to hit the bottom as ha...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @scaler911 Ala Taylor Phinney in the penultimate stage of the Tirreno -Adriatico perhaps »

  2. @Ron They are only Tasmanians unless we want them to be Australian, even though Tasmania is part of Australia.   Let that be clear ! »

My first article on Velominati was to introduce one of my favorite cyclists, Eros Poli. I refered to him as a domestique on the Mercatone-Uno team. This faux pas was properly pointed out much later by @KaffeineKeiser, a commenter who suddenly surfaced and unfortunately submerged just as quickly, like Das Boot in the Straits of Gibraltar.*I do tak...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Stu O’Grady = Passista Australiana. »

Ok, so you guys and gals don’t miss a trick, but sometimes we do. In fact, we kind of specialize in it. @Bianchi Denti just texted me to point out, as others have done on site, that we have almost missed the next stop on the VVomen’s VSP calendar, the Ronde Van Drenthe. On International Women’s Day, of all things.All I can tell yo...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Bugger, missed voting and in one foul swoop goes the points …..   winner getting 16 points ……   huge, well played »

We interrupt our usual programming to announce a new and exciting program between Velominati and our Partners: Velominati Partner Coupons & Discounts.DeFeet has been quietly supporting Velominati almost since our inception, using Rule #5 and Rule #9 to promote their line of products which fall squarely into the Flandrian Best range of cycling...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Great initiative, positive recognition of the combined group as a whole. Well played sir, now do the ship to Oz ? »

There was no clear indication that Rick’s car had actually come to a complete stop. It wasn’t that the car hadn’t stopped its forward trajectory – it had – it was just that the car hadn’t actually stopped moving. Long after the vehicle had come to rest in what could only be considered a legitimate parking spot by...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Well played sir, that would be my weapon of choice also, Subaru, that is. My 1997 Holden Commodore SS has been relegated to C2 and hence the steed resides in the back seat with front wheel in boot. I am completely Rule #25 compliant give… »

If you ever doubted for a minute that the hardmen of yore drafted the blueprint for The Rules, you need only look at these fine examples to be reminded that no matter how limited the resources they had to work with, they still managed to do a better job of Looking Fantastic than we ever could.It matters not to them that having pockets in the front...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @Nate Scotch and cocaine apparently, see no reason to argue with that, EPO of the day ? »

We are the Keepers of the Cog.  In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. @scaler911 Talk me through the whole arm warmers and gloves thing accompanied by a singlet top, FFS WTF »

Our products represent the spirit of Velominati; every product we offer is made with the utmost attention to detail – no compromises were made in their selection or design. Whenever possible, our products are made my small, locally-owned businesses who share our passion for quality and we make every effort to ensure they are made in an enviro...

@Barracuda's posts:

  1. Good old V cuff links ordered and depending on shipping will soon adorn the Fuji SST »

  2. @Nate I agree re Rapha – my black “classic kit” is now the go to kit of choice, my Castelli and Fuji kits have been relegated to K+2 and K+3 »