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Velominatus: frank

Order: Keeper of the Cog

Social: Website / / /

A lifelong Velominatus, the history and culture within cycling fascinates Frank and, if given even the vaguest of excuses, will discuss it to exhuastion. A devoted cycling aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. Email him directly at rouleur at velominati dot com.

@frank's activity:

Most great ideas in life are accompanied by an unforeseen consequence of equal or greater magnitude. For instance, no one predicted that the Industrial Revolution would pollute our air and set off climate change on a global scale. Similarly, no one realized that when placing unfathomable computing power in the palm of our hands in the form of smart...

@frank's posts:

  1. @Geraint Perfect. Especially the last bit. +1 badge to you my man. The enjoyment is in the journey and the small victories along the way; not in actually answering the question. Definitiveness is very comforting but it is also very boring. »

  2. @Ccos Because his name is “Ugo de Rosa” and he will be setting up Merckx’s own bike building business for him a few years later. »

  3. @Nate Best example of being Casually Deliberate EVER. »

  4. @Rob Let me summarize: for those less awesome than @Rob, too fucking bad. He’s awesome. You’re not. Everyone without a magnificent stroke can tune out. Everyone else, train on a fixie and go up a tad for Maximum Awesome. »

  5. @Len Yeah. We all have excuses for our obsession. Although I know this is true of Merckx to some degree. He’d also have his mech keep bars wrapped with different length stems to swap during races. But his obsession still points to one thing: a compulsiv… »

  6. @Puffy I envy you but also am sad you don’t get to experience the satisfaction of getting it right. »

  7. @Ccos I have bought a new copy recently which I love. That dude rules. he espouses the virtues of riding the smallest frame possible and I’ve noticed since that his stem was always slammed. Stud. »

  8. @pneaumme does your fitting program study a rider over the course of serious riding for half a season or more? If not, you are telling yourself convenient stories about how comprehensively you understand the system. As a scientist and mathematician who … »

  9. @beatarmy Totally agree, just tweak until you’re happy and ten tweak some more until you’re not. Then go back. When you go mo’fasta the posish is right. Amazes me the eye for fit a guy like Guimmard had – all his riders looked just perfect. LeMond, Hin… »

  10. @Simmo That is good! Do you use a long level to get the horizontal? And so long as the wall isn’t too wonkey or as you say you use the same one, everyone is happy. The plumb line is a it of a hassle. I’ve designed a contraption in my head that would wo… »

After a night of sinning, the body must be cleansed. -The Prophet, Eddy Merckx After a week away in Atlanta for business, I feel thick and heavy. These trips away are killers; the shift in time zones means the already-too long work day is extended by a further three hours. I try my best to watch my diet, but in a town like Atlanta where even sush...

@frank's posts:

  1. @unversio You’re far too trusting. @scaler911 You are the only one who can make this happen, my friend! You training up for the Heck? @Nate Yeah sure whatever. »

  2. @therealpeel We are on Pure Awesome, unfiltered. »

  3. @Red Atom Give this man a prize! »

  4. @Bespoke In a word, yes. But if it pays you back with happiness, is it really masochism? »

  5. @razmaspaz That’s why they do Cross Vegas during Interbike. @Ron I was rushing up the escalator to get to the MARTA (awesome transit system BTW) and this woman was blocking my A-Type progress. She turns to me, “WHAT YOU RUSHIN’ FOR? IT MOVES FOR YO… »

  6. @Owen Seriously. STILL HERE. STILL READING. Merckx. @BatDan Da-na-da-na-da-na-da-na BATDAN! »

  7. @Owen Perfect. “I earned this beer. I’m working out tomorrow.” »

  8. @Nate I’m right here you guys. I can read this, you know. »

Jens Voigt is set to retire as we speak, having one final crack at a long break in some race in the Cycling backwater of the USA. Is it fair or fitting that he should go out like this, slipping out the back door with little fanfare, while others have been doing a farewell tour of all the big races, replete with fancy commemorative shoes and a son...

@frank's posts:

  1. @Calmante Welcome back, my friend! »

The future is dark, which is the best thing the future can be, I think.- Virginia WoolfOur actions lie on the horizon of the present, in that swirling cloud where fantasy turns into reality. To plan is to cast a shadow into the future, to attempt to lay shape to the unknown. As the present merges with the future, reality will try our plans on for s...

@frank's posts:

  1. @Nate The camera is the artist’s tool of expression. »

  2. @sinikl So am I, which makes you our target audience, mate! Pleased as punch we got you riding a bit harder. »

  3. @ChrisO I can’t imagine the frustration this must bring a father. There were many profs I got a bollocking from for not trying and then one time in Calc IV (I was a math major, yeah – dork – still am although now I need my iPhone to calculate a tip) I … »

  4. @Nate Correct. The one that makes you look like an Evil Lord, not the one that makes you look like a twat. @Daccordi Rider That’s what I say!  We’re not scrawny, we’re optimizing body weight, ignoring the gut, of course. »

When someone uses the phrase “bucket list” within my hearing, I want to give them a snot-laden cycling glove across the chops. Because when you use a dead metaphor like that one in connection with the topic of mortality, it means that you don’t adequately appreciate the finality of mortality. “Dead metaphor,” get it? D...

@frank's posts:

  1. When someone uses the phrase “bucket list” within my hearing, I want to give them a snot-laden cycling glove across the chops. Because when you use a dead metaphor like that one in connection with the topic of mortality, it means that you don’t adequately appreciate the finality of mortality. “Dead metaphor,” get it? Death deserves his due, as they say, whatever the hell they think they mean by that. I’m saying that dead metaphors do not serve the vital function of warding off death.

    The only reason I bring that up is because if 1) you live in the Pacific Northwest and 2) you are a Cyclist and 3) you have not ridden Hurricane Ridge, well, you should, while you can. Here’s why: it’s an HC climb that begins at the salt water of the Strait of Juan de Fuca and climbs, without relent, to 1600 meters. ‘Muricans, do the math. (Hint: it’s 5242 feet.) It’s not a steep climb, but it’s a damned long one that doesn’t give you a break, and it’s entirely up to you how you let it treat you. That’s freedom. That’s life, which we all understand to be the opposite of death.

    This ride also offers the strange and exotic opportunity to stay at El Rancho del Stumpo del Norte, free of charge. El Rancho–the beginning and end of the route–is a demi-funky log home with an outbuilding and lots of covered porch area on five secluded acres about ten miles east of Sequim. (That’s right; it’s nowhere.) There is effectively unlimited camping space, whether that means pitching a tent or throwing a sleeping bag on the porch or passing out “dead” drunk on the rocked-in fire pit in the back yard. There will be unlimited supplies of ale; there will be music indoors and out; there will be fire and food cooked over fire. There will be The Most Interesting Dog in the World.

    More importantly, there will be Velominati. And their bikes. And a big fucking climb. And, as should follow, one of the funnest descents ever: smooth pavement, light traffic, and views that tempt you to divert your gaze from your line at high rates of speed.

    The details of the route are to be determined; ongoing work on Hwy 101 will determine some details. But this is the general idea: http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/387985892. Basically, we’re talking 150km, roughly, with a 1600-meter climb in the middle of it, with maybe 2400 meters of total elevation gain. Have a look at the route, and you’ll see a very symmetrical pattern: a flat, a climb, a flat. You could, I suppose, use an internal combustion device to avoid the flat bits. I don’t know why you would, but you could. There are ample opportunities to water up or refuel in Sequim and in Port Angeles, which is at the beginning of the business. At the top of Hurricane Ridge, there’s a lodge with basic services (water, bathrooms, and crap food). For detailed info, email me at davidbrande(aht)gmail(dawt)com.

    Event Details

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    Date/Time
    Date - August 23, 2014
    9:05 AM - 8:00 PM

    Location
    Peakintwoyears HQ

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

The future is dark, which is the best thing the future can be, I think.- Virginia WoolfOur actions lie on the horizon of the present, in that swirling cloud where fantasy turns into reality. To plan is to cast a shadow into the future, to attempt to lay shape to the unknown. As the present merges with the future, reality will try our plans on for s...

@frank's posts:

  1. @Yoda So cool, and so sad that the quote is wrong. Difficult to see, the future is. @Mikael Liddy HEY! I’m right here! I actually feel they show pretty well in that photo. Better than most. And there was some serious photoshopping going on here to… »