Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: ralph

Order: Level 2 Velominatus

@ralph's activity:

Every once in a while, you stumble across a quote that changes your outlook on how you approach life. Of course, this requires that one does a good deal of “reading”, which is a problem for me, as reading anything that isn’t Cycling-related feels the same as doing “work”. I do the odd bit of it nevertheless, and in a r...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @CanuckChuck Do you want the authors to burn the edges of the pages, or are you hoping for them to sing the text of the book in the company of a choral group? Or am I just one of those Internet Dweebs who makes pointless fun of typographical errors?!? »

  2. Copy ordered as a gift for my sister, who is one of those people who ride a bike but is not yet a Cyclist. (Last picture I have of her shows her proudly attired in the YJA, and latest email indicates that she doesn’t feel comfortable removing a QR rear wh… »

It looks so easy on the television. Well, no, actually it looks pretty bloody hard. We think we have some understanding of how they suffer, how their bodies can take the continual beating. But we don’t really know. Not even by riding these abominations they call roads twice in the space of a few days can we understand the scale of the thing...

@ralph's posts:

  1. Paying my money and taking my chances. VSP PICKS: 1. Chavanel 2. Boassen Hagen 3. Cancellara 4. Hushovd 5. Roelandts »

Imagine a world without the little things we take for granted; a house without a roof, a pub with no beer, a Keepers Tour without any clothes. The last one is a reality for me at the moment, five days in and still no trace of where the hell between Wellington and Paris my bag (filled with V-Kit, shoes, helmet, everything) is. The other thing that h...

@ralph's posts:

  1. Apologies if this has been answered, but I’m trying to scare up a video feed for the US in advance of the race actually starting. I have a subscription to Cycling TV, but evidently that’s going to get me a 5-minute recap of the race, which hardly seems li… »

Gent (Deinze)-Wevelgem, it starts with 130 km of cruising around Belgium and Northern France followed by a flurry of bergs and then a final 38 km of  flatter riding to the inevitable sprint finish. How hard can the climbing be if Super Mario got over them? Ask the riders from KT 2012, (the ones not in the following car) and they will tell you...

@ralph's posts:

  1. With Easter almost here it didn’t seem right to pass over (!) somebody named Jesus. VSP PICKS: 1. Peter Sagan 2. Filippo Pozzato 3. Mark Cavendish 4. Edvald Boasson Hagen 5. Jesus Herrada »

If I spent half a summer riding with one hand on the tops and one on the hoods, I spent the other half riding with each hand deliberately gripping the hoods differently. As any young Cyclist growing up in the United States in the late 80s, I had a major thing for Greg LeMond.I imagined Greg to be the perfect Cyclist, as youth often does of their...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Spun Up I’m going to go out on a limb here and state that any hood position copied from a picture of The Prophet cannot, by definition, be in violation of The Rules. »

Finally, we have Milan-Sanremo. I hope pedale.forcetta is ready to shoot some pictures, especially black and white because it will be cold and possibly wet. Throw in a little wind and a race of this distance will weed out the less hardy. Recently, but not too recently, this race would be won out of a decent size field sprint. And yet, besides Fabs...

@ralph's posts:

  1. Does @Gianni get some to wear the Understatement Jersey for the following lines from the race description? Of course, the race also weeded out Boonen, who appeared to be one of the Hardy Belgians (sorry for the redundancy), so I’d say it was more than a… »

  2. @ChrisO I second that point. I have no problem with deciding that winning this race isn’t worth the risks, but given the history of the sport and the sort of conditions people have slogged through in the past it hardly seems worth whinging on about. If it… »

  3. Not being able to see any video coverage of the race (suggestions for a US source???), I’m curious as to what changes to the bikes they may have made for this weather. Would you ride different tires for snowy climbs, or do you just assume that the ones yo… »

  4. I decided that since Gianni has declared that Farrar will not win I should clearly pick him to at least place. With any luck this will turn out to be another 0-[oint result on my part (although it’s hard to imagine not getting at least 1 for having Sagan … »

If you ever doubted for a minute that the hardmen of yore drafted the blueprint for The Rules, you need only look at these fine examples to be reminded that no matter how limited the resources they had to work with, they still managed to do a better job of Looking Fantastic than we ever could.It matters not to them that having pockets in the front...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Chris VVaking up is a great description of what is required to get me out of a warm bed in the dark, but knowing there’s a ride waiting helps. »

Until the 70′s it was common to race on gravel roads, but the Paving of the Planet has led to nearly every road being graced by smooth, black tarmac. As is the case with most things, once we are shown the easy path, it is difficult to return to more arduous ways. So it is with gravel roads; we take measures to avoid unpaved roads and in doi...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @The Oracle Maybe Frank needs to pick 3 “obvious picks” for each event and disallow their selection, forcing lists that do not all say Sagan/Evans/Cancellara. I do like the Billions and Billions (of babes?) nickname for P. Sagan »

  2. In honor of the fact that the race is being held in Italy I’ve decided to go with an all-Italian roster. I was going to stick to the members of Team Cinzano, but after that regrettable incident with the frame pump in the spokes they are dead to me. VSP P… »

Jump to: Scoring Guidelines • Schedule • ResultsThe Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, the reader must enter their submission as a comment to the post pertaining to the race in question by 5am on th...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Sky Yes – I figured that out after putting in my entries. As I said, had I a clue I might have done better, but presumably this is how one learns… »

Sometimes, getting the job done means doing it by any means necessary. Football coaches, who have just seen their team scrape out a win by a dour defensive effort and a lucky goal, refer to it as “winning ugly”. But any true Velominatus would rather lose photogenically than win ugly. In fact, our credo could well be “it’s no...

@ralph's posts:

  1. Watching the video made me think of the cyclist in The Triplets of Belleville – same nose, same ugly look, but at least Fernando wasn’t scooped up by the Cycling Mafia. »

Outside my window, its pouring rain. My bike is leaning agains the wall in my office, covered in grim and grit from the ride in, which was characterized by equal parts cold, wind, and rain. The spot in the locker room where I changed before my shower was marked by sand and mud, and when I walked to the shower, I left a trail of dirty footprints.It...

@ralph's posts:

  1. If these picks suck I’m going to blame it on the cyclo-cross-dressing picture. VSP PICKS: 1. Boasson Hagen 2. Sylvain Chavanet 3. Thomas Geraint 4. Bernhard Eisel 5. De Vreese »

Jump to: Scoring Guidelines • Schedule • ResultsThe Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, the reader must enter their submission as a comment to the post pertaining to the race in question by 5am on th...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @CanuckChuck Glad to have met (and perhaps even exceeded) my objective of winning the Lanterne Rouge right out of the gates! »

  2. I would like to define the floor of information, since I know virtually nothing about how this is going to go other than what I saw at the end of last year. I am devoid of any current information other than the starting grid, so presumably when I pick som… »

  3. So, I may be the last one here to have found this, but the following appears to be the official site for the Het Nieuwsblad race: http://www.omloophetnieuwsblad.be/nl/elite-men/race/participants, with a link to a full set of participants as a PDF. Google … »

The task spreads out before me like molasses poured onto a tabletop, indulging in its viscous immensity. Its growing breadth makes it a kind of enigma, the sort distinguished by an elusive end and therefor an intangible beginning. It occurs to me, at this moment, that the difference between those who achieve and those who stagnate is not measu...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Collin I have something of the same approach. I’m not banging out 200K rides yet, but if I decide to go for 80-100K I usually map out a loop of some sort through the countryside around me, ideally covering at least one section I’ve never been on before (… »

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but I’d need a thousand just to describe the carefully disheveled cap placement. I’d need another grand just to describe the positioning of the cranks or front skewer or downtube shifters. I’d be another mille mot in the hole to discuss the fit of the jersey or the white socks and b...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @eightzero I was worried about the notion that you were going to donate to LAF, but about 1/4 second before reading on I realized it was a Casually Deliberate head-fake. And that truly is an awesome picture of The Prophet. I work as a professional photog… »

Composites, microfibers, synthetics. They amaze in their qualities; light, strong, durable - unyieldingly stiff or unimaginably suple, depending on our whim. When modern components arrive on my doorstep, upon lifting the unremarkable cardboard box I often wonder whether there is anything at all inside or if perhaps the person on the other end of...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Deakus If my daughter has to skip a few meals I’m sure she’ll understand. The “regret” is very much of the mock variety. I have been having a hard time finding a saddle that I truly like (although I have a generic Giant brand one that I got for $5 at a … »

  2. Well, I now have to blame all of you for the fact that I’ve added a Brooks B-17 to my Christmas Gift Demands/Wish list. I hope you’re happy. »

During the birth of The Rules, just like the Big Bang, there was a flurry of new activity, too much expanding and not enough contracting; certainly not enough thinking. It’s hard to keep the throttle back when divining the Word of Merckx in real time. The interweb tubes whistled with new Rules shuttling back and forth, beers consumed, genius...

@ralph's posts:

  1. @Nate @Deakus That’s certainly a better explanation than the idea that I was just zooming along too fast. I also considered that he was probably at mile 98 of an Imperial Century (or kilometer 160.9 if you prefer) and thus in need of a hop-based recov… »

  2. @scaler911 Given that I am WTFTC (that would be WAY Too Fat To Climb), I was astounded on a recent ride when I came up behind somebody on a hill and seemed to be gaining on him. I kept back a good 20 yards (neither of us was hitting a pace that caused wi… »