Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: unversio

Order: Gray Order Velominatus

unequivocal trademark.

@unversio's activity:

What, another guest post? Seemingly yes, but in fact we are keeping to our every-other Friday guest post schedule. We must Keep The Schedule! @Harminator’s post about pigs was the little seen “pop-up” article; a confluence of Paris-Roubaix, Orchies pigs and Juliper beer. These things go very bad, very fast if not served quickly. @...

@unversio's posts:

  1. Enduring climb after climb last Saturday, and then more climbing (Gorges State Park) on Sunday, made me feel like a new and different animal. »

The Amstel Gold Race, 251 km from Maastricht to Valkenburg, the hard way. There appears to be no flat sections longer than ten meters. There are thirty-four mean little climbs to ruin the legs. We have moved on from the real Spring Classics. There is no rest in this VSP; The Ronde and Roubaix were amazing but we must continue. Legs that are smoked...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Fränk SCHLECK Victory (2006), 2nd (2008), 7th (2010), 10th (2007), 12th (2012) »

Have you ever been told to take a good look at yourself? Usually it infers that you need to smarten up your ideas, get your shit together, shape up or ship out. If Viagra eyedrops had an advertising campaign, (or indeed existed), their tagline would be: “Take a long, hard look at yourself.”Most Cyclists need to take a long hard look at...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @andrew When I wore the Giro (previously available) Lusso (white) gloves, my fingers went to sleep. »

  2. @sthilzy Zebra Guy reminds me of Jerry Lundegaard “Ya darn toot’n!” »

  3. @sthilzy This is a rider (whether he really exists or not) from the 2012 ASHEVILLE, NORTH CAROLINA MINI-COGAL. Apparently this kit also killed the link to the archived article. »

  4. @andrew He doesn’t wear that under — that is his shirt. »

  5. @scaler911 Those gloves… I’ve been wearing dem’ straight palm time-trial’n gloves simply because there is no closure at the wrist and no padding. Those gloves allow my to feel the road — all of it. And they look subtly refined. »

The Amstel Gold Race, 251 km from Maastricht to Valkenburg, the hard way. There appears to be no flat sections longer than ten meters. There are thirty-four mean little climbs to ruin the legs. We have moved on from the real Spring Classics. There is no rest in this VSP; The Ronde and Roubaix were amazing but we must continue. Legs that are smoked...

@unversio's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. VALVERDE Alejandro 2. GILBERT Philippe 3. GASPAROTTO Enrico 4. GERRANS Simon 5. VANENDERT Jelle »

Have you ever been told to take a good look at yourself? Usually it infers that you need to smarten up your ideas, get your shit together, shape up or ship out. If Viagra eyedrops had an advertising campaign, (or indeed existed), their tagline would be: “Take a long, hard look at yourself.”Most Cyclists need to take a long hard look at...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Flava Flavian »

  2. “euro as fuck” rolls off the tongue like “muthafugga” »

  3. @pink There now “euro as fuck” it rolls of the tongue. »

  4. @Mikael Liddy I like the idea that in an attempt to break his Fab handlebars, he also shook the hell out of his helmet. The cap is there at least. »

I’m old as dirt. My first two race bikes employed toe clips and toe straps and that set-up was bad. For many reasons it was bad and any retro-hipster who thinks otherwise is wrong. When Lemond and Hinault started racing on the white Look clipless pedals, everyone but Sean Kelly quickly switched. Talk about a quantum improvement, it was long o...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Calling them MAVIZXELLIUM anyway. Thanx for showing us the light as well. »

  2. @andrew I took my own advice at noontime and picked up a pair. »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @VeloSix Great level-headed finish and experience! Keep riding and writing these races up. »

I’m old as dirt. My first two race bikes employed toe clips and toe straps and that set-up was bad. For many reasons it was bad and any retro-hipster who thinks otherwise is wrong. When Lemond and Hinault started racing on the white Look clipless pedals, everyone but Sean Kelly quickly switched. Talk about a quantum improvement, it was long o...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @andrew MAVIC ZXELLIUM PEDALS »

It’s no secret that I’m prone to riding in the big ring as much as possible, mostly on account of my not being a giant sissy. In accordance with the ISO Non-Sissy Standard, I also never read instruction manuals or ask for directions when lost. I make sure to only rarely ask my VMH to turn up the radio when Adele comes on, usually follo...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @Teocalli [ A Space Odyssey HAL 9000 voice ] “I understand now, Dr. Teocalli. Thank you for telling me the truth.” »

  2. @The Grande Fondue 3T Ergosum bar »

  3. Just imagined track and field sprinters trying to start from a position with their hands on their knees — not much to leverage fast-twitch muscles. Starting as low as possible (lower center of gravity) allows position and power to get the body up to spee… »

@Harminator just submitted this little gem of a tale. It is too timely not to share with Paris-Roubaix looming. VLVV, Gianni Continue reading...

@unversio's posts:

  1. Thanx for sharing this. Making note on a napkin to only allow plans on the back of an envelope — seriously. »

The Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, your picks via the VSP Picks form above the posts section of the VSP Event article pertaining to the race in question by the time the countdown clock goes to zero...

@unversio's posts:

  1. More Giro training for Rigo — with an awesome training mate! »

It has been a brutal week for us Keepers, having decided not to hold a Keepers Tour this year. Watching the action from half a world away has been almost too much for us to bear, and I know most of the participants from last year must be feeling similarly. On Sunday, we would be escorted by our friends and guides, William and Alex of Pavé Cycling...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @Chris Which one are you pictured left to right? »

  2. @ Keepers and Velominati looking good on the Pavé Cycling Classics website. »

The grade is long and I am climbing away. I’m not going to Pantani this: I am not out of the saddle, not in the drops and not leaving everyone in my wake. The climbing gear was engaged a long time ago. There is progress, but I am not dancing up this climb. A little more cadence would really help here. If I could just get this mother-lover spinnin...

@unversio's posts:

  1. @frank [ Goober Pyle voice ] “I’ll do it!” Implementing a better technique to change the results and rewards. Thanx »

It has been a brutal week for us Keepers, having decided not to hold a Keepers Tour this year. Watching the action from half a world away has been almost too much for us to bear, and I know most of the participants from last year must be feeling similarly. On Sunday, we would be escorted by our friends and guides, William and Alex of Pavé Cycling...

@unversio's posts:

  1. Paris-Roubaix next for Wiggins »