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Velominatus: wiscot

Order: Guest Contributor

Location: West Bend, Wisconsin

I got my first bike at age 2 and have always had one since. My first real bike was a massive steel blue Peugeot at the age of 14. Subsequently replaced by a red Holdsworth, a team-colors Raleigh and a ruby-red Colnago, the latter joined by a neon-pink Cougar TT bike, a metallic green Brian Rouke winter bike and a blue Specialized mountain bike. All steel and all gone to new homes now. I joined the Johnstone Wheelers Cycling Club at 18 and became a dedicated time triallist, riding 30-50 club and open races a year. In 1989/90 I was a founding member of the short-lived VC d"Or which included velominatus and short-lived COTHO teammate Brian Smith. I also raced regularly against another real Velominatus - Graeme Obree - in the 1980s and beat him twice - once in a 10 and once in a 50. Rumors that he stopped to have a drum up at the turn are probably true. Moved to the US in 1990. Buggered up my back (working for a bike shop ironically) in 1993. Took several years off. Back riding since 2006 in Wisconsin and logging 8000+ kilometers each of the last three years.

@wiscot's activity:

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Why not? Just as plausible as his current excuse. FWIW the testosterone he was using is, apparently, not terribly effective in helping the perceived issue. With 6 kids, Jens is now shouting “Shut up dick!” »

  2. @PT Come now, he just wanted a bit of help to get his girlfriend pregnant. Perfectly sound excuse. Certainly novel, I’ll give him that. Might have been safer if he’d asked Jens. That guy has no issues in the fatherhood game. »

  3. @Buck Rogers If I was Nibali and/or Aru, I’d be making discreet enquiries into how I might find another team. The good ship Astana has a few holes below the waterline. »

  4. @ErikdR Nah, it was the Fonz – there’s a big friggin bronze statue of the guy downtown. Happy Days was supposedly set in WI but filmed elsewhere. Laverne and Shirley was the true Milwaukee sitcom, but I  guess a couple of independent, employed young la… »

I love discovering things about people who I think I know. Maybe it’s a work colleague or friend of a friend who you run into once a month, maybe every week, and as the relationship lengthens and develops you pick up a nugget of information here and there. Sometimes a mutual acquaintance will proffer an anecdote, or if they’re talking...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @wilburrox I saw some pix of Cancellara on his new bike. I swear they’re getting smaller by the year . . . »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Ron Ron, I just got Tom Danielson’s book on Core exercises. Seeing as he’s a top pro I figured he knows what he’s talking about. Only been at it for 2-3 weeks and don’t follow it to the T, but I can feel a difference already. Mostly core stuff, but a b… »

I love discovering things about people who I think I know. Maybe it’s a work colleague or friend of a friend who you run into once a month, maybe every week, and as the relationship lengthens and develops you pick up a nugget of information here and there. Sometimes a mutual acquaintance will proffer an anecdote, or if they’re talking...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Great story! Fraser sounds like a class act all round.Look at him on the bike – you can just tell he knows what he’s doing, you just know. »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @wilburrox In Wisconsin, they’re brat lockers. »

  2. @pistard I think this pic belongs in the Michelin Man thread. A shirt and bow tie can’t hide those rolls o fat! »

Brad Wiggins is sitting at home, watching his team implode at a Tour de France he was not invited to.What’s on his mind? An attempt at the Hour Record, that’s what. Now that the UCI has allowed riders to mount a conventional (track) time trial machine in their efforts and the likes of Boardman, Obree, Moser, Rominger, and Indurain all...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Hell’s bells, I can’t keep up with all the folks going for the record. It’s like waiting for a bus: you wait for ages with nothing in sight then 5 come at once. Should be fun to watch. I see the really big names (Fabs, Tony Panzerwagen) are keeping quiet … »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @RobSandy I think that would read: LYCRA-CLAD PERVS STOLE MY JOB AND MY TAXES! »

  2. @ChrisO What about all the German and Greek welfare claimants living in that Buckingham Palace place in London. Fucking scroungers, living off taxpayer money for generations. None of them have a real job. Send em home I say, send em home to wherever the… »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Chris Myhill Looks like a Lancia – some sweet  Italian stylin’ going on at the rear end. I’d date the picture to the late 60s as Merckx rode for Faema from 1968 to 1970 and de Vlaeminck for Mars Flandria in the late 60s too. Roger and Erik rode a lot o… »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @ChrisO Personally, I’d be quite horrified at being known as someone who “read” the Daily Mail. If one were to give guidance, it would be to buy another paper that actually employs journalists. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @pistard Look. At. Those. Bars. Wow! That’s a helluva drop on them. Torchy would be proud of Frank’s set-up on his bikes . . . »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Teocalli “International Travel” In Belgium means driving about 20 miles in any one direction to reach another country! Back in the pre-EU days, vehicles that traveled around beyond their natural borders had the stickers: NL, GB, B, F, D, I, DK etc. Wh… »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. I won’t post the chicken pic again, but I have one question: has his torso ever seen a ray of sun in his life? As for the moles, I think they’re tattoos of the stars in the northern sky – which is where he was when he said he wasn’t because he was somewhe… »

The darker months bring out the macabre in each of us; for Gianni it was the extinction of his beloved Park Tool adjustable clamp. For me, I found myself mourning the fact that I recently purchased a headset press. Ignoring the fact that a Velominatus of my stature didn’t already own one, the mourn behind the mourn is where the interest lies...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. One other thing about that photo: Koblet was the “pedaller of charm.” Bartali always looked good and stylish. Alas, poor Robic made Michel Pollentier look good on a bike and that’s saying something. Later in his career Robic wore an old school leather hel… »

  2. @Buck Rogers Dammit – it’s the ever-stylin Hugo Koblet. »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Carel Damn, posters were just so cool back then, weren’t they? I mean, even movie posters suck ass these days. »

We want to look like Pros, sure, but what we’re really after is feeling Pro. All the aesthetics are just a tool we use to fuel the fickle internal combustion engine of Morale. In the end, there is little that will make you feel Pro more than clattering along a stretch of cobbles in a small group; instant “select breakaway”. One...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Haldy That has got to be one of the most terrifying sights for a pro: riding PR where, on the stones, the viable options for riding are few and far between, only to see a bunch of mugs blocking your way. What to do? Move to a different part of the roa… »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @SamV Thanks for posting! If the one with the Prophet wasn’t weird enough, imagine that scary bastard showing up on a podium these days . . . »

The darker months bring out the macabre in each of us; for Gianni it was the extinction of his beloved Park Tool adjustable clamp. For me, I found myself mourning the fact that I recently purchased a headset press. Ignoring the fact that a Velominatus of my stature didn’t already own one, the mourn behind the mourn is where the interest lies...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Left to right: Gino Bartali, Jean Robic and . . . not sure. Doesn’t look like Coppi and I can’t get a look-see on the jersey. Bartali’s says Bartali on it. Robic’s a funny-looking wee bugger so he’s easy to spot. That some Rule #9 riding go… »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. I can’t do it because I’m pathetic at computers, but I’m sure somewhere out there has the skills: Take a look at Michelin man from long ago and today – he has become less fat and more “sculpted” like he’s been working out. Interesting how the marketers ha… »

The darker months bring out the macabre in each of us; for Gianni it was the extinction of his beloved Park Tool adjustable clamp. For me, I found myself mourning the fact that I recently purchased a headset press. Ignoring the fact that a Velominatus of my stature didn’t already own one, the mourn behind the mourn is where the interest lies...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. I love how an article on ball bearings instantly reminds people of Ole Ritter and his Giro TT. One of the most sublime cycling films ever. »