Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: Bespoke

Order: Level 2 Velominatus

Location: Toronto, Canada

Social: Website

Member of the "Cycling is the New Golf" club. The only pursuit from my embrace of middle age that works up a sweat, as clearly golf, curling nor the consumption of single malt (even vigorous consumption) don't. Except perhaps in the middle of the night.

@Bespoke's activity:

While all evidence points to the contrary, the 20th century’s greatest twatwaffle LE Gunderson may have got something at least half right after all. Of course it’s about the bike, otherwise we’d be runners. But there are other factors that contribute to what makes us Cyclists which can often be overlooked completely. Not the cloth...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @Frank Why oh why no opportunity to edit something as simple as hear for heat? »

  2. Beautiful photograph. Your post makes evident the geographic breadth of this community as we,in the Northern Hemisphere, make room for the most beautiful of riding weather as the ebb of spring’s blooms give way to the rising tide of the hear of summer’s r… »

In most situations, silence is an ominous thing that signals impending doom. Having never been in any danger myself, I base this largely on my experience watching box-office movies. As a general rule, I use Hollywood as the principal source of information on all subjects as they relate to doom and politics, principally because I’m loath t...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. I find that some freehubs are obnoxiously loud and ratchety sounding, while performing as designed, while others (thankfully mine) are virtually silent. I would think that loud freehubs would be avoided by Velominati. As for the pic with that snugly cl… »

We are the Keepers of the Cog.  In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @Chris Chris, I am not shadowing you (much – an no bottom puns here) but that is a rather horrific picture – a document of the dark side of professional cycling? And, I am not talking about the knee scrapes. Will some say that that’s how you look when … »

  2. @Chris Supposition. That’s sorta like an Ass Saver, right? »

  3. @Beers On a site where shaving one’s legs is a detailed topic of discussion, among other gender edge challenging topics, I think you’re manliness won’t be questioned for commenting on a compatriot’s (beautiful) child. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @sthilzy That’s a lovely, fascinating and thorough piece of industrial design evolution vis a vis ergonomic positioning that you have referenced. If it’s appropriate in this context (it is in my world): chapeau to you. »

We’re heaping coals on the Giro frenzy that’s burning in all corners of the Cycling world by issuing the second installment of the monthly BigRingRiding Sur la Plaque series while at the same time kicking off the Six Days of the Giro series where we’ll post six articles on the subject of this, the best Grand Tour of the year. Y...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @eightzero Am I the only one that doesn’t understand the application of this metaphor, in this instance? I get it that the willful loss of something in one place you wish you had elsewhere could be seen as fucked up, but I don’t get the incest jest. Can… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @Dr C Excellence are also anointed with  “golden tickets”. »

  2. @Tartan1749 Ohhhh. Aesthetics! Well, that’s another story. Never mind… »

  3. @Tartan1749 How much does a spoke weigh? Do a few more spokes make a difference to anything but increased reliability? »

  4. @eightzero I believe it’s “Peen-a-rello”. Prego. »

Young riders rise through the ranks with such promise. We all know the story; the rider who borrows a bicycle and enters a local race and wins. He decides he might be good at going batshit fast on a bike. Mom and Dad buy him a klunker for his birthday and he takes out a license. He starts winning most races he enters locally and rises to the region...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @TBONE Nice. And do, to indicate “ownership” That error is rampant. Rules are Rules! »

  2. @il ciclista medio We do that because there is no more powerful a communication device than the telling of stories. Heroes and villains, winners and losers, these are the characters that represent the forces of good and evil – the oldest stories that we… »

Our products represent the spirit of Velominati; every product we offer is made with the utmost attention to detail – no compromises were made in their selection or design. Whenever possible, our products are made my small, locally-owned businesses who share our passion for quality and we make every effort to ensure they are made in an enviro...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @Cyclops This sounds like a ritual typically performed by a rabbi. Is there any sacrament involved or is the very act sufficiently indicative of devotion? Ask and answer – guilty. »

  2. @Chris @ChrisO You guys are one very clever dudes. Funny to boot. »

  3. @Chris and @ChrisO: are you one and the same or a nom de plume for one or the other? You do seem to post together very often. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Rule #27 presents a few issues, at least for me it does. Maybe it does for the cyclis… »

There are always at least two ways to accomplish any task: properly and improperly. Drinking beer from a glass, not the bottle; carrying a full umbrella instead of a miniature fold-up; stirring your gin martinis, not shaking them; wearing french cuffs with a suit, not button cuffs. The Velominatus, of course, is drawn towards doing things Properly,...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @RedRanger Better than it would seem! Send pics if you can add another task to the mix. »

Our products represent the spirit of Velominati; every product we offer is made with the utmost attention to detail – no compromises were made in their selection or design. Whenever possible, our products are made my small, locally-owned businesses who share our passion for quality and we make every effort to ensure they are made in an enviro...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Which is the greater transgression: non-compliance with Rule #33 or an inability to comply with Rule #7? »

We are the Keepers of the Cog.  In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @sthilzy Why is it taking so long for one of the Photoshop geniuses to replace the card with The Book?! »

There are always at least two ways to accomplish any task: properly and improperly. Drinking beer from a glass, not the bottle; carrying a full umbrella instead of a miniature fold-up; stirring your gin martinis, not shaking them; wearing french cuffs with a suit, not button cuffs. The Velominatus, of course, is drawn towards doing things Properly,...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @RedRanger While I am jealous that you are already driving a convertible when we’ve just (hopefully) seen the last of snow for this year, what is even more impressive is that you can simultaneously drive your convertible, work on another vehicle and po… »

  2. @the Engine How the hell can you tell from that photo that those are your bibs? Please don’t say it’s because you recognize the chamois. @scaler911 I hope you keyed his car. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Bespoke's posts:

  1. @PeakInTwoYears Indeed. I would have bought one when I was just getting into this whole cycling thaang. There was a beauty CAAD 10 in a 51 frame at the LBS but they insisted I should be fit to a 54. Every other shop and the friend I ended up buying my … »

  2. Fuck. Decal. »

  3. @PeakInTwoYears Isn’t there also a rule about the chain being on the big ring and cranks at a certain attitude? Ahem, Mr. Punk… Nice deal though! »