Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: DerHoggz

Order: Gray Order Velominatus

Location: Western Pennsylvania

I'm pretty new to cycling, but I am embracing the rules and attempting to lay down some V.

@DerHoggz's activity:

Given the fact that everyone over-tightens their pedals to the crank arms, one needs a long lever to get too much torque. Rule #94 decrees using the correct tool and using it correctly. While the proper tool has always been available, it is up to us to evolve, to understand the difference between right and wrong, between vice-grip and open-ended w...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @unversio Why seal pedal threads? »

  2. I couldn’t find a bottle opener the other day and was shocked that none of my tools had an integrated one!  I clearly need more Lezyne, wlmist got one of their multitools with an opener, but opted for the smaller tool without.  A terrible mistake indeed. … »

The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path, not the end. In pursuit of La Vie Velominatus, we know of no end to the Path; each of us journey through an endless evolution of understanding and reverence. As such, The Word continues to be handed down from high upon Mount Velominis and The Rules continue to be expanded upon. Today we present you with t...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @Ron One time I flatted on a midnight commute and a cop pulled over for safety or somesuch.  It took me like 5 minutes to stretch the tire back on and I felt like an idiot while he just stood there and watched. »

What, another guest post? Seemingly yes, but in fact we are keeping to our every-other Friday guest post schedule. We must Keep The Schedule! @Harminator’s post about pigs was the little seen “pop-up” article; a confluence of Paris-Roubaix, Orchies pigs and Jupiler beer. These things go very bad, very fast if not served quickly. @...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @Ccos I think the skinsuits are required to be all one color per the UCI?  I remember reading something about that. »

  2. @anthony There is nothing “refined” about it, even on nice days you get sweaty, salty, and dirty. @tessar I want to know, but don’t want to know regarding that Martin picture. »

The Amstel Gold Race, 251 km from Maastricht to Valkenburg, the hard way. There appears to be no flat sections longer than ten meters. There are thirty-four mean little climbs to ruin the legs. We have moved on from the real Spring Classics. There is no rest in this VSP; The Ronde and Roubaix were amazing but we must continue. Legs that are smoked...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. Watching Gilbert on those punchy finishes is always amazing.  You see him go and can be pretty much guaranteed he’s got it. »

Have you ever been told to take a good look at yourself? Usually it infers that you need to smarten up your ideas, get your shit together, shape up or ship out. If Viagra eyedrops had an advertising campaign, (or indeed existed), their tagline would be: “Take a long, hard look at yourself.”Most Cyclists need to take a long hard look at...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @andrew I don’t wear gloves except for cold and racing, but it is important to have a nice snug fit so it doesn’t wiggle around.  I also prefer no padding, and my long fingered gloves with padding cause me to hold the bars differently. »

It’s no secret that I’m prone to riding in the big ring as much as possible, mostly on account of my not being a giant sissy. In accordance with the ISO Non-Sissy Standard, I also never read instruction manuals or ask for directions when lost. I make sure to only rarely ask my VMH to turn up the radio when Adele comes on, usually follo...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. My bars are probably considered compact traditional bend, I love them.  Zipp changed the shape so now I must hold onto these forever! »

I had always imagined that de Ronde van Vlaanderen must be hardest race in the world. The way I worked it out – having never ridden the course of either event at the time – was that de Ronde had the same cobbles as Roubaix, but with 20% grades thrown in. It makes enough sense so long as you don’t know what you’re talking abo...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @frank Cancellara’s weak days are equivalent to others good days?  I believe it! »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @sthilzy Pretty sure it’s a Thomson. »

  2. @RedRanger I like it, but it will be dated in just a few years.  Murdered out is just boring though. @unversio I’ll see what else he can get for me, but I have to acknowledge it is a good frame and will possibly be a very good deal. »

  3. In the ongoing bike replacement saga: My LBS is pushing one of these for a frame.  I really want to buy from them , but I’m not so sure on Specialized, and the colors are lacking (I would probably go for neon vomit honestly).  I have no doubt it is a gre… »

Everyone knows you need at least three road bikes – two if you’re absolutely determined to make a point about minimalism. Bike Number One is reserved for good weather and events, and the Rain Bike for inclement weather. Just like our guns need to be pampered and rubbed down whenever we’re off the bike, any time Bike Number One isn...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @sthilzy Do they not know that will ruin the aero? »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @nimmersatt My understanding is that the popular open mold frames are in fact built by many different companies.  That is why there is some variability in pricing/specs/weight. »

Evolution doesn’t really seem to be part of the picture anymore, at least not where humans and our direct reports are concerned. We control an astounding number of genetic defects in ourselves, our pets, and agriculture while Science and Technology give Natural Selection swirlies in the locker room.Take exercise-induced asthma, which is a con...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @frank Yeah it is essentially about optimizing the different parts of the stroke. I still haven’t read the article, so I had no idea what direction you were approaching this from. »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @Steve-o I just got a Kask recently that is quite fetching and very comfortable, but it kind of sits on top of my head rather than surrounding it although that happens with most helmets. »

Evolution doesn’t really seem to be part of the picture anymore, at least not where humans and our direct reports are concerned. We control an astounding number of genetic defects in ourselves, our pets, and agriculture while Science and Technology give Natural Selection swirlies in the locker room.Take exercise-induced asthma, which is a con...

@DerHoggz's posts:

  1. @tessar @frank I can’t debate the results, but I don’t quite understand the explanation.  If it is taking averages of torque and angular velocity, I would think it wouldn’t effect the result.  Yes you would move slower or faster throughout the strok… »

  2. @andrew I did read an article addressing the evolutionary biology of why we have sweat glands (did you know boobs are essentially a highly specific sweat gland?) a while back.  Compared to other primates we are much better endurance runners, and the up… »

  3. @frank I think we were originally discussing the “effective” gearing at different points on a non-round ring?  Yes, a 54 ring of any kind will always pull 54 rollers through in one revolution.  With non-round ones there is not a constant pull for a con… »

  4. @frank And now I’m being pedantic but the chain is he load, the bottom bracket would be the fulcrum.  It is a class 2 lever. »

  5. @frank Bicycle chain is half-inch pitch, so saying a ring has 53 teeth is the same is saying the ring has a circumference of 53x.5″.  Chainrings essentially come in quantum circumferences. »

  6. @DerHoggz (accidental half post) Bigger chainrings have a larger radius, thus they have a larger circumference and more teeth.  One rotation from a larger radius chainring pulls more links compared to one rotation of a smaller ring.  Same for a half rota… »

  7. @frank Tooth count is essentially an analogue for circumference which is directly related to the radius of the ring »

  8. @frank It depends on what you mean by gear size.  In a round system gear inches would be constant for all intervals of the stroke.  With non-round the rollout for two different arbitrary sections of equal angle could be different.  It actually is picking… »

  9. @Optimiste That spiroghraph made me think Wankel, which would be great.  But your elegant device is surely the answer. »