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Velominatus: EBruner

Order: Level 2 Velominatus

Location: Glasgow, KY USA

Rare Coin Dealer by profession. I started cycling in the glorious mid-1980's. If you were not out riding in the 1980's you really missed something special. I still want to cry when I think back to those days.

@EBruner's activity:

There is nothing more disappointing than discovering the truth behind a myth or spotting the mortal behind a legend. This is why I make a point never to do any research or in any other way attempt to validate my assumptions when evaluating a situation; mystery that feels like a fact and sounds like a fact is better than an actual fact. Tr...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @DeKerr Well that there is fucking Gold!! »

What does the layman observe when he sees a cyclist in the wild? While we do our utmost to Look Fantastic, in our own eyes and minds at least, outside observers may as well be witnessing little green aliens who’ve just stepped off their spacecraft and are heading to their very first fancy dress/drag party on this weird and wonderful planet...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. Great read. I have been cycling since the mid 80’s in various redneck southern town, and the looking like an alien thing has never went away. The hillbilly redneck diesel trucks get their kicks blowing smoke when they pass. »

To keep chickens is to walk a path towards introspection. From the songs they sing after laying an egg (which I assume is “chicken” for “I’m Every Woman“) to the sheer glee they show when they find a worm in the mud, chickens provide a perfect example of living life in and for the moment. The most interesting aspect o...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @frank I agree completely on descending to be in the drops, and I do on ‘real’ descents. But on generally level, climbing, or rolling hills I have been a hood rider for 30 years. Just natural to me. On rough or uneven pavement I will quickly go to the … »

  2. I have always done 90% of my riding from some version of the hoods. I feel most control from hood positions. Drops on major descents or murderous head winds only for me. »

A great unknown awaits the young men, bound by a common entity of steel, flesh and passion rolled together. Do they contemplate the future, or are they so encapsulated in the here and now that anything beyond the finish line seems like it could only be for old people? Have they any inkling which path they will take, or be guided towards? Maybe...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers  “Swim-Bike-Run…We’re good at none”  Now that there is funny!! »

  2.  I thought that was a key reason for hating “Pharmy”; because of his love for all thing tri. That, and he looks like suck a prick even in this photo. I raced the Hotter than Hell 100 in 1989 and he was there then, same prick. »

 Rule #4 is clear but how do you explain to your five year old what a twatwaffle is? I was left trying to define twatwaffle to a room full of relatives, none five years old but a few close to ninety-five years old. Someone opened The Book of Rules and loudly read out Rule #4. Some hand waving and muttering about the Dutch deflected things, thankf...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. I had no idea about this book, VERY cool. Thanks for sharing with us. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @DeKerr My valve placement is just fine, sewup valves don’t line up with the labels. :) »

I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out. - Bill Hicks That famous quote from the Greatest Comedian Of All Time™ has resonated with me for many years. It became my silent mantra, as I don’t suffer fools gladly and sometimes don’t make much effort to conceal the fact. Lately, I̵...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. We have to give these idiot at least the chance to see the light. Most have no idea how to act, kit up, or ride in a group. I was fortunate enough to have a true hardman take me under his wing when I was 16 and show me the way. In 1984, grape nut eating h… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. Slideshow: Fullscreen: Download: Powered by DM Albums™ My regular rotation. »

There was never any question in my mind that tubulars are more romantic than clinchers, and as a Velominatus I was always convinced that the additional time and care that goes into gluing on a set of tires would make you feel just that much more connected to your bike and the history of the sport itself. I was skeptical, however, that tubs would ri...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. Spa Spare tire neatly folded under seat. I tried the figure 8 around my back ONCE. Ruined a wool jersey with glue. »

  2. I ride sewups and have done so for going on 30 years. Pitstop works sometimes, but more times than not it just makes a big mess. Swapping the tie is fast and easy and I am back on my way. The road debris in my area is awful, and I go through several hundr… »

Choice, or the perception of it, is one of the most powerful forces on Earth. The great secret lies in the locus of control, which suggests that if given the perception of a choice we will be more willing to endure hardship or suffering. We’ll suffer even for the promise of a future intangible reward so long as we feel we have a choice...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. Bravo, I just wept…… »

It’s no coincidence that Stage Five of the Tour was not only the best one to watch, or that it helped decide the race before nary a hill was crested, but that it was just, well, Stage Five. Only last minute copyright clearances prevented the organisers actually dubbing it Stage V, though they managed to get the rain delivered on time, an ess...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. Fucking spot on Brilliant!! »

The Whale Shark is the biggest nonmammalian vertebrate* on the planet, rivaling the dinosaurs for size. How do you feed yourself when you’re that huge without loading up on carbs all the time? Easy, you swim around with your mouth wide open for 22 hours a day and hope enough food swims in there to take the edge off the hunger pangs. Cycl...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @Teocalli Way to dish it out!! Love fowl weather suffering! »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. A snap of the newest ride. I hope since I ride Sewups, I can get a pass on my dual bottle cages. »

Brad Wiggins is sitting at home, watching his team implode at a Tour de France he was not invited to.What’s on his mind? An attempt at the Hour Record, that’s what. Now that the UCI has allowed riders to mount a conventional (track) time trial machine in their efforts and the likes of Boardman, Obree, Moser, Rominger, and Indurain all...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @thefringthing I agree, Merckx and Aero should the only categories. Even if Ritter was a whiny pussy complaining the weather kept him from beating Merckx, he was still on a real mans Bicycle. Fuck the space ago looking BS, hammer it out like a man on a … »

On our trip to Paris, my wife and I, in need of culture, rode the Vélib bikes to Cycles Laurent. This was our first French bike shop visit and excitement was high as we navigated our helmetless headed way through the city traffic. The shop is a classic; it’s crammed with bikes and clothes. There is no room to move. My wife immediately dove into...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. My wife and I did the same thing 3 weeks ago. We rode 180 miles around Paris on Vélib bikes and made the trip to Cycles Laurent. Great guy!! I bought 3 jerseys and spent about an hour speaking with him. I emailed him a picture of me on a ride here in Kent… »

@Harminator just submitted this little gem of a tale. It is too timely not to share with Paris-Roubaix looming. VLVV, Gianni Continue reading...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. That pig is going to haunt my dreams!! »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @teleguy57 Cracking perfect, the saddle is not my cup of tea, but overall it is tits. »

I wasn’t anywhere near old enough to hold a driver’s license but my dad had already bought me a motorcycle. It was a late seventies BMW R100 RS, dark blue. I loved that bike; I polished it fortnightly even though it never left the garage. I spent hours sitting on it, twisting the throttle and squeezing the clutch, diving in and out of t...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @unversio I agree, not my Cannondale, a buddy was meeting at my house for a ride and leaned his bike against my BMW. »

  2. Speed is is the ultimate intoxicant. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@EBruner's posts:

  1. @Mark1 VERY nice steed. Now get out and ride the shit out of it! »

  2. @Xyverz The Master has no choice with the stems, they are sewups. »

  3. Alright, and these photos more rule compliant? Slideshow: Fullscreen: Download: Powered by DM Albums™ »

  • Wilkins is right about his role in his bike/car incidents. There’s 2 sides to the equation, always. As cyclists,...

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