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Velominatus: Eli Curt

Order: Level 2 Velominatus

Location: Manhattan

Social: Website

I blink once. Twice. It's still dark out. I rub my eyes and yawn, swinging my tired legs over the side of the bed where they grope for leather sandals. In the dark. At last they find them as I make my way to the washroom down the hall to handle my business. I grab my bibs on the way, along with my heart rate monitor, a jersey, socks and some chamois cream. The bibs reach the same place every time - razor sharp lines are etched into my heavily defined legs to indicate as much. The chamois cream is becoming less and less effective as I spend increasing amounts of time searching for an affordable pair of adequately-padded bibs. The jersey doesn't zip all the way - the muscles in my neck gained during close to 10 years of wrestling cling like a newborn koala. I finish getting dressed and affix the remaining accoutrements - sunglasses, a cap, a helmet, some carbon-soled obnoxiously-loud shoes. I grab The Black Widow by the saddle and guide her through the door as the world begins to radiate pink. I raise my hands above my head and arch my back. The road is my burrito.

@Eli Curt's activity:

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@Eli Curt's posts:

  1. Proposed Rule #93: Support your LBS. Support them when you don’t need them, or they won’t be there when you do. »

@Eli Curt's posts:

There is nothing going on right now, oh right, except the Tour of Poland. Can we talk?I don’t think it’s just Frank and myself who are obsessed with the Hour Record. It is Hard Man cycling distilled into its purest form, the ultimate race of truth. During the first week of Tour de France madness Fabian Cancellara made it official he wa...

@Eli Curt's posts:

The Ride. It is the cathedral of our sport, where we worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. It is the end to our means. Indeed, The Bike may be the central tool to our sport, but to turn the pedals is to experience the sensation of freedom, of flight. It is all for The Ride.The world is overflowing with small, twisty roads that capture ou...

@Eli Curt's posts:

A death is a painful thing to experience. Particularly, I imagine, for the one doing the dying. For those left behind, it takes time to mourn and come to grips with the change; it is an unpleasant process, but such is the way of things.The crack in the chainstay of my beloved Cervelo R3 had been weighing on my mind ever since I discovered its exist...

@Eli Curt's posts:

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Eli Curt's posts:

@Eli Curt's posts:

Cycling has been suffering a crisis every since the use of a helmet became compulsory. This crisis is rooted in the simple fact that cycling peaked aesthetically with the cycling cap perched casually deliberate atop a sweaty cranium. It was only after mandatory helmet dictum spread its tentacles into all UCI-sanctioned races in 2003 that helmet man...

@Eli Curt's posts:

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Eli Curt's posts:

Cycling has been suffering a crisis every since the use of a helmet became compulsory. This crisis is rooted in the simple fact that cycling peaked aesthetically with the cycling cap perched casually deliberate atop a sweaty cranium. It was only after mandatory helmet dictum spread its tentacles into all UCI-sanctioned races in 2003 that helmet man...

@Eli Curt's posts:

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Eli Curt's posts: