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Velominatus: Giles

Order: Level 3 Velominatus

Location: Perth, Australia

Social: /

Will be cremated with my bike and wearing lycra. Will never win a bike race. Likes coloured coordinated and shiny things.

@Giles's activity:

It doesn’t take a genius to see what’s going on here. Rule #5, Rule #9, Rule #10; every rider in this frame Looks Fantastic (most other Rules). The riders are in short sleeves and shorts while the public apparently has scavenged materials from rubbish bins and the local grain elevator in a very visually unpleasant effort to keep war...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Without the context of the other photos, you’d swear he’s enjoying a crafty ciggie while racing in that photo – which obviously while this would be extremely cool, is unlikely to be the case. Great photo – but seriously those conditions, shit… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @il muro di manayunk figured that! And there is now an older 10 speed centaur gruppo on the Wilier. The Trek was a bike of opportunity – hence the lack of preparation and budget for the full build. Gradually I hope to upgrade – gruppo hopefully to Record … »

  2. @RobSandy . Exactly my mental process, the orange makes me work twice has hard on the bike. Spacer wise there are three, one twice as thick as the other two. I will try every conceivable combination to try and finesse the look. Will let you know how it g… »

  3. @il muro di manayunk agreed but the purchase of the frameset above (correctly identified as a custom paint job) left me in a position of having to strip what is now No. 2, to get on the road. Campy on a Wilier is far more palatable I feel. Here is No.2 wh… »

  4. @brett thank you sir, and yes I think you might be right on the money… »

  5. Here’s the latest no.1. Loving it.  1 »

“My dear, Find what you love and let it kill you. Let it drain you of your all. Let it cling onto your back and weigh you down into eventual nothingness. Let it kill you and let it devour your remains. For all things will kill you, both slowly and fastly, but it’s much better to be killed by a lover. ~ Falsely yours” ― Charles BukowskiIt&#...

@Giles's posts:

  1. (oh wow dropped to “4”) »

  2. @Puffy @Puffy ^^ this, if you happen to be reading wifey, see I’m not weird. Great article, captures it all for me – moreso as another cyclist lies in critical condition in a local hospital and the media are currently targetting cyclists for being ir… »

I’m not even talking about all the pseudo-asthmatics out there, vaping their way to better breathing. My breathing is just fine. It’s my little citron sized heart that is slowing me down. Is there a street-legal injection or vacuum pump for heart enlargement, or a trip to a doctor in the Congo that would transplant a badass Mandrill heart for m...

@Giles's posts:

  1. I drink coffee before I ride for only one reason. It stops the caffeine withdrawal headache halfway through the ride. I’m not an addict, well maybe I am, but as someone drinks only the equivalent of 4 espressos a day, it’s easier to prevent than cure the … »

It has been a brutal week for us Keepers, having decided not to hold a Keepers Tour this year. Watching the action from half a world away has been almost too much for us to bear, and I know most of the participants from last year must be feeling similarly. On Sunday, we would be escorted by our friends and guides, William and Alex of Pavé Cycling...

@Giles's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Geraint Thomas 2. Boonen 3. Cancellara 4. Wiggins 5. Sagan »

This needs no introduction. The Spring Classics are truly upon us. The course has been modified yet again, it is tougher? The riders make the race and the 2014 Ronde van Vlaanderen is loaded with racers who could win or make the Velominati VSP placings. Just to pick the winner will not be nearly as easy as it has been recently. There are small clo...

@Giles's posts:

  1. wide open, no idea, »

  2. Absolutely wide open I reckon VSP PICKS: 1. cancellara 2. devolder 3. sagan 4. roelandts 5. boonen »

Everyone knows you need at least three road bikes – two if you’re absolutely determined to make a point about minimalism. Bike Number One is reserved for good weather and events, and the Rain Bike for inclement weather. Just like our guns need to be pampered and rubbed down whenever we’re off the bike, any time Bike Number One isn...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @DerHoggz Surely an April 1st joke? »

For many Americans, their first ten speed bike was a Schwinn. It was heavy. Everything about it was heavy. It was the bike that was going to survive outside the bomb shelter. No one put a better crankset on a Schwinn. When we moved on that old bike languished in the garage and it was not coming back out. Not so for @Teocalli, for starters he didn&#...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @Puffy I had an old Ricardo sand blasted and powder coated at a local paint shop for about $100 – huge selection of colours and took 3 days – it’s my commuter bike.  Looks awesome (well I think so) now »

Het Volk (it will always be Het Volk to me) and now the Strade Bianche may well mark the sentimental beginning to the season, but those are specialized, pre-season races that appeal mostly to riders who are preparing for bigger objectives later in the year, such as the Cobbled or Ardennes Classics. Same goes for Tirreno Adriatico and Paris-Nice; t...

@Giles's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Cavendish 2. Degenkolb 3. Petacchi 4. Greipel 5. Sagan »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @Puffy I’ll be at the 3 Peaks too – just swapped out my Campy C50 Bullets for a set of Neutron Ultras, the descents here in Perth on a windy day have been a tad too hair raising on those aero rims. Nice effort on the sub-10 goal – you’ll know me, I’ll be … »

The most important moment in a man’s life is the first time they have a beer. I place it on the list above sex and having a child because sex usually only happens as a direct result of drinking beer. As for having children, I’m given to understand they are poop factories at first, then promptly become loud, and then obnoxious before the...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @kixsand That really rings true. I’m currently conflicted. I’ve made it to no alcohol Monday to Thursday with random Friday and or Saturdays without. I have moved away from what I consider the heavy drinker mentality that means generally “a” glass of wine… »

Last year we read that Philippe Gilbert is riding a 50cm (top tube of 535mm) BMC frame and he is 1.79m (5’10”) tall. Now it’s reported in Cyclingnews that Ritchie Porte’s Pinarello is a 46.5cm frame (top tube of 515mm) and Porte is 1.72m (5’8”) tall. He is no Nairo Quintana but somehow he is on Quintana’s old bike. Porte is just one i...

@Giles's posts:

  1. At over 40, I have decided I can no longer justify skinny jeans. I put small bike frames in the same bucket. I will ride big and comfy every time – especially as I don’t have a professional masseuse at home to sort the knots and pain out… »

Water is an asshole, at least when it comes to bicycles. So is wind, now that I think of it; I don’t love it, unless its at my back, but that rarely seems to happen even on out-and-back routes. Fire’s not winning any prizes either, unless you’re talking about the hunk-a-hunka burnin’ V. Even le soleil isn’t scoring po...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @Rom As my office mate once said “I’m a follower not a leader” – I have the organisational skills of a gnat, but I’m up for it. Doing the 3 Peaks in March so a hills ride in the New Year could work for me. Failing that a bit later. There’s a couple of oth… »

  2. Very nice article. Summer here in Perth at the moment so while I might like to sympathise with all you notherners, I won’t. Don’t mind crap weather on the bike, but getting out the house when it’s raining already – that’s tough. I find once the feet are … »

The first tire patch kit I ever owned came in a big green box, had several patches of various sizes which were possibly made of old truck tires. It also came with a sheet of 60 grit sandpaper. The mild high offered from sniffing the glue while applying the patch almost made you stop caring you’d gotten a flat in the first place. Stoned on glu...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @frank Wrong. I think most of us read all the articles. And what’s more I think everyone who has picked up the book at my house has chuckled and gone home to check out the web-site and maybe even signed up. You’re doing soemthing right. And I think the t… »

The home ground of Manchester United Football Club, Old Trafford, is colloquially known around the world as the Theatre of Dreams. It holds a revered place in the hearts of the club’s supporters, and even those of other teams; it’s an icon of football, and sport in general. Millions have gone there to watch their heroes play, but how ma...

@Giles's posts:

  1. this is all so spot on. I have done some of the early bird time trials here in Perth, where the course record is held by one Cameron Meyer, ok so in his Pre-pro years but its kinda cool. I’ve never understood why the football codes are so precious about … »

Flies and dogs, two things that we don’t need on a climb.I had descended down this street many times, but I had never before ridden up it. I even said hello to the two excited pitbulls on the other side of the driveway gate. I like dogs. I like them until one of them squeezes under the gate and I’m going uphill slowly. Pitbulls arenR...

@Giles's posts:

  1. Got chased by a farm dog in the Pyrenees when I was at Uni, I swear in my red haze sprint to get away from it the tyre came off the rim and popped back on as I went round the corner. Either that or I was close to light speed and vision had all gone to coc… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@Giles's posts:

  1. @ChrisO Oh wow. Great photos. Love the white accents. With a matte frame wouldn’t gloss V logos work better? »

An ancient Velominati legend states that when the The Prophet created the common fly, he gave it a maximum air speed of exactly 12 kilometers per hour. When he created the common Cyclist, on the other hand, he gave us a maximum climbing speed of 11.9 kilometers per hour.The worst flies on the planet live in the Pyrenees, where it is hot and humid...

@Giles's posts:

  1. Aussie blow flies. The worst. Fortunately, unlike most Aussie critters they don’t kill you instantly. On a different note, that climb looks amazing. »