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Velominatus: JohnB

Order: Level 1 Velominatus

Location: Arbroath

Social:

Cyclist and cycling fan based on east coast of Scotland. I enjoy the road, track, MTB and commuting. The TT never did it for me. Occasionally I do get to ride in the sun. Pleasantly surprised by my hitherto unknown compliance with The Rules.

@JohnB's activity:

What does the layman observe when he sees a cyclist in the wild? While we do our utmost to Look Fantastic, in our own eyes and minds at least, outside observers may as well be witnessing little green aliens who’ve just stepped off their spacecraft and are heading to their very first fancy dress/drag party on this weird and wonderful planet...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Absolutely bang on as I laugh out loud. Around cyclists and cycling I’m at ease, comfortable and proud of how I’ve tried to turn myself and machine out (especially in what precious V kit I have). In any other environment, except perhaps the rural cafe th… »

 Rule #4 is clear but how do you explain to your five year old what a twatwaffle is? I was left trying to define twatwaffle to a room full of relatives, none five years old but a few close to ninety-five years old. Someone opened The Book of Rules and loudly read out Rule #4. Some hand waving and muttering about the Dutch deflected things, thankf...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @markb Exactly my thinking. »

I have an idea. If Mr Cookson and the UCI are eager to lift women’s cycling up, why not sponsor a women’s race for each of the Monuments of the sport? A Giro di Lombardia Féminin would be a much better end to the season than the Chrono Des Nations. Each Monument would have an earlier start time than the men’s, a slightly shorter...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Hanna Solovey 2. Alison Tetrick 3. Melodie Leseur 4. Tatiana Antoshina 5. Hayley Simmonds »

Attention, this is the final event on the Men’s VSP calendar for 2014. There is one more Women’s event to come. We may already have a winner of this years over-all but the rest of the podium could be up for grabs. @il muro di manayunk has broken away and I’m not sure @steampunk is going to chase him down. Has everyone noticed how...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Well I don’t feel so bad at missing out now, very few points won in the VSP there. Chapeau to Bianchi Denti and girl. »

  2. Bugger +1 That’ll teach me to sleep during the night. My first Delgado. »

I’m getting too old and cranky for all this race schedule changing. I know they already did this last year and presumably I had the same gripings then, but Lombardia is supposed to close out the season and I’m downright angry that Paris-Tours is closing out the books now; it only seems right that one of the most beautiful races should...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Dan Martin 2. Greg van Avermaet 3. Mikael Kwiatkowski 4. Alejandro Valverde 5. Daniel Moreno »

I was asking earlier, how do you know if you are a cyclist? One sure sign is when one brings a bike on almost all vacations. If a vacation does not include some cycling, is it a vacation? If you asks that, you are a cyclist. Hopefully this has been a long-term condition and all other vacationeers accept this with a shrug, yeah, a damn Velominatus.V...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @ChrisO Cool. »

  2. I hope this wasn’t the Cogal? Not cool if it was. Headwear is a personal choice. »

You can only spend so much time with the Schlecks before you start talking like them, and the fabulous Fabs seems to have crossed the threshold. I’ve heard more complaining from him this season than I have talk about pushing harder on the pedals or going steady up with more speed or going full gas like everyone else, but just doing it for ...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Greg Van Avermaet 2. Simon Gerrans 3. Alexander Kristoff 4. Peter Sagan 5. Ben Swift »

Our products represent the spirit of Velominati; every product we offer is made with the utmost attention to detail – no compromises were made in their selection or design. Whenever possible, our products are made my small, locally-owned businesses who share our passion for quality and we make every effort to ensure they are made in an enviro...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @Velo-Jack I received an email from Frank tonight. Many items like cufflinks/ aprons and V pints are now back in stock and overdue clothing orders should start to appear by the end of October. Expect the site to be updated appropriately when Frank is re… »

This is big. This is the race that decides the arc-en-ciel  jersey for the next year. It is the best looking jersey. It carries the most baggage. It also brings the most respect. The World Championship is a circuit race of attrition. In Ponferrada Spain it’s an 182 km loop done seven times, with a total of 2142 m of climbing. Is it a climber...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. The trouble with a night shift is you have time to reconsider. I’ll be sorry if the TTT was a bit of sandbagging by Ms Vos. VSP PICKS: 1. Elizabeth Armitstead 2. Emma Johansson 3. Elisa Borghini 4. Pauline Ferrand Prevot 5. Evelyn Stevens »

I was asking earlier, how do you know if you are a cyclist? One sure sign is when one brings a bike on almost all vacations. If a vacation does not include some cycling, is it a vacation? If you asks that, you are a cyclist. Hopefully this has been a long-term condition and all other vacationeers accept this with a shrug, yeah, a damn Velominatus.V...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. So true @ChrisO. You’ve had a good summer, experiencing the delights of Wales and the Scottish Highlands in your time home. The scenery will sustain you through another stint in Dubai. @Gianni it’s not a holiday for me unless it involves biking. The main… »

This is big. This is the race that decides the arc-en-ciel  jersey for the next year. It is the best looking jersey. It carries the most baggage. It also brings the most respect. The World Championship is a circuit race of attrition. In Ponferrada Spain it’s an 182 km loop done seven times, with a total of 2142 m of climbing. Is it a climber...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Marianne Vos 2. Elizabeth Armitstead 3. Emma Johansson 4. Elisa Borghini 5. Pauline Ferrand Prevot »

If Tony gets a flat or two and loses this time trial, bookies will be jumping off bridges into the Thames. It’s a lock, man, it’s a lock. There, it is now jinxed. You are welcome. Picking second through fifth will take some acumen. Will these be Vuelta riders or does that just hold true for the road race? Tony could have a jour sans. Co...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Start list http://www.mundialciclismoponferrada.com/descargas/categoria18/categoria20/1909130.pdf VSP PICKS: 1. Tony Martin 2. Rohan Dennis 3. Bradley Wiggins 4. Tejay Van Garderen 5. Svein Tuft »

All hail, the Worlds are upon us. The time trials should be events where all VSP participants can rack up some decent points. Remove team tactics, national team versus trade team allegiances, using this event to train for another event, bonking and hanging onto team cars from the equation. All one is left with are possible flat tire, possible mecha...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @the Engine Taking it very seriously I see. Defending that top 10 place? »

  2. VSP PICKS: 1. Ellen Van Dijk 2. Evelyn Stevens 3. Linda Villumsen 4. Lisa Brennauer 5. Katrin Garfoot »

Stupidity is a powerful force never to be underestimated. Geese are a good example; a more stupid vertebrate one would be most challenged to come across yet should you wander into a flock of them pecking about peacefully in a field, one is likely to erupt from its grazing to grab a billful of your ass and commence beating you savagely with it...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @Owen http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B0093QJQMK Tiny roll but 1m enough for a couple of bikes. »

  2. @davidlhill I like your poem David. Too often I’ve heard from drivers and cyclists ‘but I was in the right. It would have been their fault if they hit me’ That may matter only to insurance companies, courts and fatal accident enquiries when assigning blam… »

@Bianchi_Bob sent his article in just this week. Its sense of urgency required it to be published NOW. We all need reminding to live in the moment; here is a good reminder. Thanks Bianchi Bob. Yours in Cycling, Gianni Continue reading...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Fuck me, what a story. I think I could deal with me having something as awful as cancer and all the treatment entails but one of my kids? And three times? I don’t even think the bike could help me deal with that. The tears would corrode my stem. Your dau… »

The modern day Pro cyclist has many disadvantages stacked against them by comparison to their forefathers. They have to ride plastic bikes with little or no distinguishing character or discernible caché; they must willingly or perhaps unwittingly subject their body to an array of questionable “training techniques”; and they have to sp...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. @Owen »

PerfectionThe fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Perfection

    The fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that the total climbing for the 144km ride is 2770m and this is only on day 1. Day 2 will be shorter (70km)but being the Scottish Highlands will not be flat. Did I not mention that this is a weekend event? Hell yes!

    Lodgings are available in the Kinlochewe Hotel where pre ride espresso and post ride recovery beverages will be taken. The hardy will share the attached 12 bed bunkhouse whilst those who demand a greater degree of comfort can stay in the hotel itself. Tel 01445 730253 to book in.

    Join us UK based Velominati, for what will undoubtedly be a rugged classic.

    Route Day 1: http://www.strava.com/routes/98589 Day 2: To be decided over beer.

    VLVV

    JohnB

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - August 23, 2014 - August 24, 2014
    8:05 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Kinlochewe Hotel

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

  2. Perfection

    The fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that the total climbing for the 144km ride is 2770m and this is only on day 1. Day 2 will be shorter (70km)but being the Scottish Highlands will not be flat. Did I not mention that this is a weekend event? Hell yes!

    Lodgings are available in the Kinlochewe Hotel where pre ride espresso and post ride recovery beverages will be taken. The hardy will share the attached 12 bed bunkhouse whilst those who demand a greater degree of comfort can stay in the hotel itself. Tel 01445 730253 to book in.

    Join us UK based Velominati, for what will undoubtedly be a rugged classic.

    Route Day 1: http://www.strava.com/routes/98589 Day 2: To be decided over beer.

    VLVV

    JohnB

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - August 23, 2014 - August 24, 2014
    8:05 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Kinlochewe Hotel

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

  3. Perfection

    The fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that the total climbing for the 144km ride is 2770m and this is only on day 1. Day 2 will be shorter (70km)but being the Scottish Highlands will not be flat. Did I not mention that this is a weekend event? Hell yes!

    Lodgings are available in the Kinlochewe Hotel where pre ride espresso and post ride recovery beverages will be taken. The hardy will share the attached 12 bed bunkhouse whilst those who demand a greater degree of comfort can stay in the hotel itself. Tel 01445 730253 to book in.

    Join us UK based Velominati, for what will undoubtedly be a rugged classic.

    Route Day 1: http://www.strava.com/routes/98589 Day 2: To be decided over beer.

    VLVV

    JohnB

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - August 23, 2014 - August 24, 2014
    8:05 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Kinlochewe Hotel

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

First run in 2002, the GP de Plouay-Bretagne is part of the women’s UCI World Cup series.  It’s 4.5 laps totaling 121km. As usual, there is little information or publicity for yet another women’s UCI race. Here is a start list. Here is the official French website. And yes, Ms. Vos won the last two editions. We regret the lack of...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Armitstead’s already won the World Cup overall with a race to spare but she’s not been off the podium much at all and will want to continue that. Vos is the boss and will make a point that had she done the whole WC, the title would have been hers. Or some… »

PerfectionThe fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that...

@JohnB's posts:

  1. Perfection

    The fifth Cogal to be held in Scotland will tackle what is considered to be the UK’s toughest road climb, the famed Bealach Na Ba (Pass of the Cattle) Wester Ross. Rising from sea level to 626m in 10km, this jewel is the closest thing to a true Alpine pass that Britain has to offer. For anyone thinking that this is it, be advised that the total climbing for the 144km ride is 2770m and this is only on day 1. Day 2 will be shorter (70km)but being the Scottish Highlands will not be flat. Did I not mention that this is a weekend event? Hell yes!

    Lodgings are available in the Kinlochewe Hotel where pre ride espresso and post ride recovery beverages will be taken. The hardy will share the attached 12 bed bunkhouse whilst those who demand a greater degree of comfort can stay in the hotel itself. Tel 01445 730253 to book in.

    Join us UK based Velominati, for what will undoubtedly be a rugged classic.

    Route Day 1: http://www.strava.com/routes/98589 Day 2: To be decided over beer.

    VLVV

    JohnB

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - August 23, 2014 - August 24, 2014
    8:05 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Kinlochewe Hotel

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

  • Wilkins is right about his role in his bike/car incidents. There’s 2 sides to the equation, always. As cyclists,...

  • One word, old mate … abridge!

    Fuck me that’s a long article. I really should read one someday around here.

  • @DeKerr

    Indeed, great story. What year was it published? I could not find the date. Mentions Pharmstrong’s...

  • @Ron

    YES! Ron, we have a date with DESTINY!!! Or a ride, not sure which? Either way, some of us are going to do...

  • @kixsand best of luck. Have fun and ask lots of questions!

  • Holy fuck! Anyone have any hot deals on GoPros and helmet mounts?

    Or maybe small firearms and bibshort holsters?

  • @PeakInTwoYears hear, hear. I to am fortunate to ride in friendlier climes

  • One word, old mate…………camera.

  • Mindfulness–and let’s just pass right over the idea of compassion for the moment–isn’t easy when it’s hard. When...

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