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Velominatus: Mike_P

Order: Black Order Velominatus

Location: Surrey, UK

Social: /

47 years young, loving husband, devoted father of two fabulous young boys, totally untalented but slightly obsessive cyclist since rediscovering the joy of the bike a few years ago. I work in the pharmaceutical industry but no, I'm not a drug dealer (as I was introduced at a party once) and no I can't hook you up with some EPO (I've been asked).

@Mike_P's activity:

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. Oh what might have been.  Watching the finale of the past three stages got me wondering just how huge a battle Bertie and Nibbles would have been having if AC had still been riding. It seems that Nibbles is too strong for his team to support him whereas T… »

The Whale Shark is the biggest nonmammalian vertebrate* on the planet, rivaling the dinosaurs for size. How do you feed yourself when you’re that huge without loading up on carbs all the time? Easy, you swim around with your mouth wide open for 22 hours a day and hope enough food swims in there to take the edge off the hunger pangs. Cycl...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @piwakawaka Exhibit 1:Laurensis Dribblus Maximus »

Brad Wiggins is sitting at home, watching his team implode at a Tour de France he was not invited to.What’s on his mind? An attempt at the Hour Record, that’s what. Now that the UCI has allowed riders to mount a conventional (track) time trial machine in their efforts and the likes of Boardman, Obree, Moser, Rominger, and Indurain all...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @Owen Isn’t this place, right here, where we normally drunkenly heckle Frank? If only we could somehow organise Frank versus Haleakala versus The Hour as an event in two halves to run one immediately after the other. That’s got to be worth pay-per-view… »

  2. Sorry to drag you all away from the fascinating science, which I don’t really understand and which is all starting to sound like ways of “breaking wind” more efficiently.  I’m amazed that no-one has yet posted this… »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @Teocalli You are our very own Tony Gallopin! »

  2. @wiscot This!  Great class and respect being shown.  Sagan pisses me right off. He’s got so much talent but his ego seems to be getting in the way of him at times.  He’s in green but he’s lost a fair few stages this Tour. The only thing troubling me is… »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Man, he rides rollers better than his dad!  Papa Terpstra is on his turbo.  That’s so cool that I’m going to have to shame my 6 year old with it tonight. »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. The next few days will be epic. Temperatures are currently rising to around 40c in Southern France. It’s gonna be utter madness by the time Dutch Corner is reached. This is turning out to be one of the most memorable Tours in years. »

Rule #33- Legs are to be carefully shaved at all times.This is one of the Rules that really defines the term Cyclist to the Velominati. Discussions about Rule #33 flare up on the site occasionally, burn brightly then smolder out. Between faces and legs, it is a lot of man-scraping. Rule #33 is a task master. Compliance is one thing, defending it t...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @Nate Here here.  I’ve always found that when off the bike for injury, illness or family reasons, keeping the guns shaved really helps me keep the faith. »

  2. @tessar I worked with a guy who shaved his arms and the backs of his hands.  He wasn’t a sportsman at all, just shaved.  Even in my universe, that’s just weird. »

  3. @VeloJello and..breath !!!  Aren’t the Thought Police likely to arrest you for alleged blasphemy like that, in your Toon Army part of the World? »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @strathlubnaig This.  I’m really looking forward to Tony Martin kicking the crap out of him at the Worlds. »

Rule #33- Legs are to be carefully shaved at all times.This is one of the Rules that really defines the term Cyclist to the Velominati. Discussions about Rule #33 flare up on the site occasionally, burn brightly then smolder out. Between faces and legs, it is a lot of man-scraping. Rule #33 is a task master. Compliance is one thing, defending it t...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @JACD214 Good man.  You’ll get to enjoy the pleasure of applying a warming winter embrocation without looking like a matted furball the cat just threw up. »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @VeloJello Grand Depart Prologue – Edinburgh Stage 1 – Edinburgh to Northumberland Ferry Newcastle to Amsterdam Stage 2 Amsterdam to Antwerp Stage 3 Calais to Dieppe That’s that sorted. »

  2. @KW “I think cobblestone races are made for Classics. For a Classic you can chose to ride over the stones, but if you participate in the Tour de France you don’t volunteer to take the cobblestones,” said Terpstra. No you don’t volunteer, Niki; you get … »

  3. @Fausto Crapiz I actually took you literally. Doh! »

  4. @Teocalli Slow day? »

  5. @Chris Prudhomme was on BBC Radio last Saturday morning, ahead of the Grand Depart, saying that after London in 2007 and with Wiggo causing such huge public interest in the 2012 Tour and Olympics, he and ASO had already made a decision that they needed… »

  6. @VeloJello +1 »

  7. @wiscot I haven’t said the car wasn’t needed.  I haven’t invoked Rule #5 at all.  I’m saying he looked shocked at where he’d ended up so early in the race. That’s a very different state for him.  Regarding my minion comment, that’s called humour. »

Our products represent the spirit of Velominati; every product we offer is made with the utmost attention to detail – no compromises were made in their selection or design. Whenever possible, our products are made my small, locally-owned businesses who share our passion for quality and we make every effort to ensure they are made in an enviro...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. Doing my bit for international relations; Passo Falzarego in the Dolomites, last week. »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. @Teocalli He almost looked to be in a state of shock. Or maybe he was expecting a minion to do it for him (no offence @minion). »

  2. Just trawled back over the last couple of pages and of course, the main talking point is Froome and what may now happen on GC, but holy cow, this guy needs celebrating.  What a ride. Boom !! »

  3. @Chris This.   Nibbles looked like a man on an absolutely obsessive mission.  He realised he had the chance to gain more time and went for it big-time.  He knew it was terrain he’s not overly comfortable on, but smashed it up.  He has gone up yet anothe… »

The Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, your picks via the VSP Picks form above the posts section of the VSP Event article pertaining to the race in question by the time the countdown clock goes to zero...

@Mike_P's posts:

  1. And the VSP has just been blown apart.  I always thought Sky would fall apart on the road in this Tour but expected it to be because of the other teams giving them a kicking.  This is early. »