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Velominatus: Skinnyphat

Order: Level 4 Velominatus

Location: Stow, MA

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@Skinnyphat's activity:

Oh brothers and sisters, we find ourselves here again. It was but a few moments ago when the Milan-Sanremo VSP went up. Racers fought the sleet, producing an unforgettable start to the Velominati VSP season. Cancellara, Nibali, Froome and, and Horner were all big points winners for our astute and well informed audience. But now it has come to Paris...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Van Avermaet 2. Degenkolb 3. Ciolek 4. Boom 5. Ferrar »

Il Lombardia, this is the race of the fallen leaves. This fall classic is a beautiful race in a beautiful region of Italy. The arduous route may change year to year but what does not change is the Italian need to win this thing. There is some national pride at stake here after the Italian men finished off the podium in Firenze. Bergamo to Lecco, 24...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Valverde will be racing angry VSP PICKS: 1. Valverde 2. Nibali 3. J-Rod 4. Ulissi 5. Uran »

The world championship road race stands out among all other one-day races as the one where the winner is awarded both a curse and a jersey to carry for the next 12 months. It also inspires way too many riders to wear white bibs, which is an alarming trend in itself and one which I hope Brian Cookston, the new UCI President, prioritizes over the dop...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Sadly no Americans. We need some one day guys, too many stage racers VSP PICKS: 1. Cancellara 2. Sagan 3. Gilbert 4. Nibali 5. Rodriguez »

Seriously. Is it almost September? This was not the agreement, this was supposed to be an endless summer. And all you A-Holes down there in the Antipodes are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, enjoying longer days and shorter nights. I don’t need to tell you where you can take that, but it’s dark and it smells. I have no patien...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS (1st Rest Day Swaps): 1. Nibali 2. Valverde 3. Horner 4. Rodriguez 5. Betancur »

Saddle bags have no place on a road bike, and are only acceptable on mountain bikes in extreme cases.Saddle bags: how do we define them? Is it a saddle bag if it attaches to the seat post and the saddle, if it has a zipper, if it is leather, has two natty straps with buckles, if it swings below the saddle like bumper bollocks? Continue reading...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. I just read this and puked »

Seriously. Is it almost September? This was not the agreement, this was supposed to be an endless summer. And all you A-Holes down there in the Antipodes are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, enjoying longer days and shorter nights. I don’t need to tell you where you can take that, but it’s dark and it smells. I have no patien...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Nibali 2. Henao 3. Horner 4. Rodriguez 5. Betancur »

Each of us throw a leg over our top tubes and submit ourselves to the open road in recognition of the risks involved. These risks include those of a puncture, crash, damaged equipment, disability, and – ultimately – death. We try to be vigilant, we ride assertively yet defensively, and we hope for the best. We take every reasonable precaution t...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Just saw this. Terrible news and very sad. RIP @itburns »

The early eighties saw the tide change in the European Peloton. Components were taking on a new, curvy shape as they left their boxy forms behind. The glint of toe clips in the sun would become a rarer sight as the move towards clipless pedals would take hold in 1985. English speakers were winning the big races classically won by continental Pros.T...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Going out on a limb, everyone picking Froome this is my only chance.  J-Rod has been in a super secret soviet training lab for the last 3 months VSP PICKS: 1. Rodriguez 2. Froome 3. Contador 4. Valverde 5. Evans »

There is something to love about a race that makes a deviation to its route for the simple joy of sending a fleet of professional riders up a fiendishly steep and narrow ramp. The Cote du Stockeu offers zero benefit to the route from a logistical standpoint – in fact, all it does is complicate things. On the way down from the Cote de Wanne &#...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Valverde 2. Gilbert 3. Gerrans 4. Dan Martin 5. Iglinsky »

I hadn’t planned to ride them every day. In fact, I had planned to only ride them once and let other people ride them. But, genius that I am, I forgot my ceramic brake pads and had to source some new ones which was a maddeningly difficult process given that Europe observes something in the neighborhood of 363 holidays per year.I was more than...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. I sleep with my carbon wheels »

It looks so easy on the television. Well, no, actually it looks pretty bloody hard. We think we have some understanding of how they suffer, how their bodies can take the continual beating. But we don’t really know. Not even by riding these abominations they call roads twice in the space of a few days can we understand the scale of the thing...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. I have no chance of coming back VSP PICKS: 1. Cancellara 2. Phinney 3. Roelandts 4. Chavanel 5. Boom »

Marianne Vos has never won this? She who wins everything all the time has never won this? Is it not hilly and tough enough? This seems like a tear in the time-space continuum. Someone is going to be wanting to add this to her palmarés. Weather sounds like a cold but dry day for racing. This is a big one, maybe worth two bumper stickers, so ponder...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Bronzini 2. Armistead 3. Vos 4. Johansson 5. Stevens »

Imagine a world without the little things we take for granted; a house without a roof, a pub with no beer, a Keepers Tour without any clothes. The last one is a reality for me at the moment, five days in and still no trace of where the hell between Wellington and Paris my bag (filled with V-Kit, shoes, helmet, everything) is. The other thing that h...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Peter Sagan 2. Fabian Cancellara 3. Sylvain Chavanel 4. Geraint Thomas 5. Greg Van Avermaet »

This is the second round of the Women’s World Cup, the first being the Ronde van Drenthe. Laveno Mombello to Cittiglio, 120 km of racing in Italy. It is a very worthy course and we know who will be wearing the number 1 on her jersey. Enough already, I like Ms Vos as much as the next person but someone has to work her over on the climbs and ri...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Vos 2. Cromwell 3. Armistead 4. Johansson 5. Bras »

Gent (Deinze)-Wevelgem, it starts with 130 km of cruising around Belgium and Northern France followed by a flurry of bergs and then a final 38 km of  flatter riding to the inevitable sprint finish. How hard can the climbing be if Super Mario got over them? Ask the riders from KT 2012, (the ones not in the following car) and they will tell you...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Cancellara 2. Sagan 3. Boonen 4. Roelandts 5. Geirant Thomas »

Finally, we have Milan-Sanremo. I hope pedale.forcetta is ready to shoot some pictures, especially black and white because it will be cold and possibly wet. Throw in a little wind and a race of this distance will weed out the less hardy. Recently, but not too recently, this race would be won out of a decent size field sprint. And yet, besides Fabs...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Oops I guess I’ll add more than Sagan, although that may be enough VSP PICKS: 1. Sagan 2. Boonen 3. Gilbert 4. Cancellara 5. Nibali »

  2. VSP PICKS: 1. Sagan »

My first article on Velominati was to introduce one of my favorite cyclists, Eros Poli. I refered to him as a domestique on the Mercatone-Uno team. This faux pas was properly pointed out much later by @KaffeineKeiser, a commenter who suddenly surfaced and unfortunately submerged just as quickly, like Das Boot in the Straits of Gibraltar.*I do tak...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Team Sky has a virtual monopoly on these guys.  Stannard tops the list for me… »

Until the 70′s it was common to race on gravel roads, but the Paving of the Planet has led to nearly every road being graced by smooth, black tarmac. As is the case with most things, once we are shown the easy path, it is difficult to return to more arduous ways. So it is with gravel roads; we take measures to avoid unpaved roads and in doi...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Van Avermaet 2. Cancellara 3. Gasparato 4. Pozzato 5. VanMarcke »

Finally, some cold nasty Belgian one day racing. Oman, Qatar, does anyone brag about winning those stage races? Yes, they might but really, it’s a tune up for the real season which finally begins this Saturday. Will racing in China or Oman grow the sport? Will there be a new wave of inspired young racers from these countries. Does professiona...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Olds 2. Johansson 3. Stevens 4. Armistead 5. De Vries »

Outside my window, its pouring rain. My bike is leaning agains the wall in my office, covered in grim and grit from the ride in, which was characterized by equal parts cold, wind, and rain. The spot in the locker room where I changed before my shower was marked by sand and mud, and when I walked to the shower, I left a trail of dirty footprints.It...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Boonen 2. Boasson Hagen 3. Van Avermaet 4. Fletcha 5. Pozzato »

The severity of a crash exists on two planes, the physical and psychological. The physical is the most obvious and one we busy ourselves with in the immediate vicinity of coming down. Our bodies need time to heal, our kits may need replacing or mending, and our bicycles may need repair work. For weeks and sometimes months, we may carry with us t...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. @roger Roger this is why you should join us out in the burbs »

There is something supremely Fantastic about a precisely manicured set of sunglasses, particularly when they’re not being used for their intended purpose. Certainly, there are times when circumstance offer no alternative but to actually look through them, but for the most part, it’s a bit pedestrian to use sunglasses for seeing through...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. I never take my glasses off, especially when I’m on the rivet.  It’s like a professional poker player, I don’t want people to see my eyes or else they may know how tired I am… »

At some point, I reckon the idea may dawn on me that I’m not a climber. Eighty kilos and standing something just shy of two meters, I’m not clear on why climbing is what speaks to me most about Cycling; I’m certainly not built like a grimpeur. But there is no question about it; I love riding in the mountains. I only have to catch...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Well done Frank. I feel equal amounts of envy and pity for you. »

Truth be told, how many of us can resist a photo of ourselves Looking Fantastic on the bike? How many of us can resist the temptation of taking our eyes off the road and stealing a glimpse of ourselves in a shop window as we pass by? Not me, but then again a strong case could be made for my being a narcissist and I freely admit that I love looking...

@Skinnyphat's posts:

  1. Me in my first CAT3 race, Grand Prix of Beverly (MA) – It was a rude awakening »