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Velominatus: Zoncolan

Order: Level 4 Velominatus

Location: Auckland, NZ but English via Norwich

Social:

Thinks he is a kind of Gilbert grape, loves rain.

@Zoncolan's activity:

Even Wiggo said it’s just a bike race. Bike racing may be just that but Cycling is life. And Love is life and it’s amazing when they all get tangled up together. We first heard from @Farzani months ago; a Belgian in training. She said she had an on-going story to tell and asked if we were interested. It’s an honor we can share the...

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Carpe Diem encapsulated in an article.  Remember to feel the breeze as you descend and hear the hum of the tyres as you ascend.  Stop and take a look around as tomorrow it might all be gone.  It is all in the Bike if you take the time to look. Allez! »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @mouse It was probably snagging the frame after my Too Fat To Climb physique had stress tested the “vertical compliance”… »

  2. @frank For the Record (hurhur) i have actually ridden the Lotus bike Boardman is on in the top photo. My god it is low, unstable and fast and my back nearly died after about 2 minutes. Mental. But then i have not the souplesse that fella had. Or tale… »

With Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics 2012 stitched up and in the history books, the challenge of documenting the trip became immediately obvious; how do you take the myriad impressions, experiences, and perspectives and put them down in a meaningful way – let alone in a way that can somehow be digested. Surely, to document even just the Keeper...

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. My boy Museeuw would counteract a 50 ring with an 11-21 rear surely? However i imagine the truth is the 50t would be his inner granny ring. You obviously misinterpreted him. However those calves would scrape against a big ring over 50t so maybe it m… »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. I li@frank I Literally want to vomit with jealousy, riding with my hero. Now if Gianni meets Bartoli I WILL ride over there and hurt someone (whilst wearing my anti starry eye lensed Jawbones) »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. ..and THAT race was why we all love Flanders. Much like Bartoli did in 1996, i think this sums up why i get on a bike and daydream about the greats. And now Tommeke is alongside my hero Museeuw in the history books. Fair play. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. And yet how about this for Rule V? Panache and reserves in spades. Chapeau! http://www.stuff.co.nz/oddstuff/6447334/100-year-old-sets-cycling-world-record »

Even as a Pre-Cambrian Velominatus, the rusty wires in my brain must have made the connection between my machine’s aesthetics and the lack of a saddle bag; I can’t remember a time when I rode with a European Posterior Man Satchel. But riding without a saddle bag means the tools go in the pocket, and that means great care must be take...

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Road Id on wrist, iPhone to call the team car/take photo/number of passing VMHs. Isn’t that all anyone needs? »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @Gianni —and one Tour i would happily swim from New Zealand with my bike on my back for… »

  2. @Gianni ^^^^^^^^^ THIS! They continue to argue and yet metaphorically Gianni has bolted up the road for the win…. Eros Poli eat your heart out. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Care of my hero, lads. Thing is, is this not the photo of him smashing his kneecap in 1998? If it is, it is true Hardman stuff. I still remember his victory subsequently in 2000 when he pointed at his knee. Tearjerking and wonderful Rule #5. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. My yellow Northwave Evolutions with carbon inserts c2000 run just fine, don’t match the bike or kit, but I forking love them and whenever i look down i feel the volupte wash over me. I remember getting them with the carbon sole (woah, futuristic in 200… »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @Oli Beat me to it! Strong work. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Awesome, just awesome. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @harminator +1 »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @Minion This, X infinity. Stong turn at the front @minion … »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @frank @frank +++++++1 always good to meet a fellow Bartoli fan. His ability to suddenly go 15km/h faster on a false flat without any perceptible change in rhythmn were beautiful to see. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Ryan has a quite funny blog btw, his commuting and CX tales are worth the read, including some top quality heckling at a CX race. »

  2. Apparently he likes beating fancy boys in townline sprints too… »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @Pedale.Forchetta Ahhh, Michele Bartoli. Still my favourite rider ever, he could frustrate and delight in equal measure but ALWAYS with sprezzatura. NAME DROP COMING…Genuinely nice guy, i met him at a dinner once in Milan and he sent me a signed … »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Gilbert 2. Visconti 3. Voeckler 4. Sella 5. fedrigo »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Enjoy. I will be doing V hill repeats as penance for living in NZ. »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. Obviously i use my teeth like Binda. What the Rule-5ing hell do you lot need tyre levers for? »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @frank Hell “Is Joey OK?” NEVER gets less funny with each viewing. Poor guy. Kinda like a Velominati equivalent to the NFL player getting hit in the nuts by the ball. It should not be funny but is. Bit like small Spaniard climbers fighting after a c… »

@Zoncolan's posts:

  1. @Zoncolan +1 to me. missed the Thumbs Up. »