Velominati › The Community
Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: brett

Order: Keeper of the Cog

Social: Website

Whilst Brett hails from the land Down Under, he hates that fucking song. An Aussie now living as a Kiwi, he is at home on the rich dirt of New Zealand's mountain bike trails as he is on the scorching tarmac of Australia. Despite his geographical disadvantage, the cobblestones and kassien of Belgium and Northern France hold a special place in his heart and it's where you'll find him each Spring, either with a bike underneath him or a fine Belgian ale in his hand.

@brett's activity:

The cobbles are not for everyone. Peter van Petegem said it best, that you have to really love the stones to be good at them. Much like climbing, they demand that the rider forge a close relationship with a special kind of pain – one that is self-inflicted and inspires you to inflict more.I knew I would love the pavé before my tires ever c...

@brett's posts:

  1. @frank, nice one mate, looking forward to hitting the stones again with you next April. There really is something about the cobbles that bring out the best in you, by beating it out of you. Some secteurs treat you better than others, or suit some riders … »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy That be steel mate… »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@brett's posts:

  1. @cognition Spot on… none of that on display at all. We’ve had other riders who’ve obeyed Rule #19 and have been welcomed into the fold. This guy just wanted to be an ass and shove his way in without a word or any sense of safe riding. »

I love discovering things about people who I think I know. Maybe it’s a work colleague or friend of a friend who you run into once a month, maybe every week, and as the relationship lengthens and develops you pick up a nugget of information here and there. Sometimes a mutual acquaintance will proffer an anecdote, or if they’re talking...

@brett's posts:

  1. @piwakawaka His stories of late have mainly been about “hanging on to the back of the bunch for grim life” or “pulling out after 40ks when I got dropped”. Usually with a little chuckle, the kind that says “when I’m fit though, these guys better look out… »

  2. @minion He’s shaving the legs again too, although on Sunday he has some stubble going on… and a full beard which he’s been cultivating a while now. Unemployment seems to suit him well! And the snot rocket technique is still in full effect… »

  3. Love the name on this… “Mac Master Fraser” »

  4. Sorry about the shitty photo album… I can’t seem to fix the sizing and @frank has possibly been kidnapped. Here’s the offending photos of a slimmer, more coiffed Fraser… »

Brad Wiggins is sitting at home, watching his team implode at a Tour de France he was not invited to.What’s on his mind? An attempt at the Hour Record, that’s what. Now that the UCI has allowed riders to mount a conventional (track) time trial machine in their efforts and the likes of Boardman, Obree, Moser, Rominger, and Indurain all...

@brett's posts:

  1. Rohan Dennis now having a go too… »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@brett's posts:

  1. @wiscot @KogaLover I thought it was an Alfa Romeo myself, maybe a Giulia, but the tail on those had a dip in the middle so a Lancia was my second guess. The only DAFs I’d heard of were trucks! @bianchi denti will know… »

Brad Wiggins is sitting at home, watching his team implode at a Tour de France he was not invited to.What’s on his mind? An attempt at the Hour Record, that’s what. Now that the UCI has allowed riders to mount a conventional (track) time trial machine in their efforts and the likes of Boardman, Obree, Moser, Rominger, and Indurain all...

@brett's posts:

  1. Looks like Jacky Bobby is having a crack at the Hour too… »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Teocalli Oops… by “the guy parked on the footpath” I thought he was referring to The Prophet… my mistake. Sorry @SamFromTex »

  2. @SamFromTex Blasphemy. »

  3. @Buck Rogers  Yes and no. I feel a bond with some of my fellow Cyclists, others I want nothing to do with. The amount of fuckwits I see doing stupid shit on bikes every day makes my blood boil as they are hurting our collective cause. Then there are the… »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@brett's posts:

  1. @the Engine Whoa! This is gonna be something to watch! »

We want to look like Pros, sure, but what we’re really after is feeling Pro. All the aesthetics are just a tool we use to fuel the fickle internal combustion engine of Morale. In the end, there is little that will make you feel Pro more than clattering along a stretch of cobbles in a small group; instant “select breakaway”. One...

@brett's posts:

  1. That’s a great photo. @Harminator No gutter to utilise there! »

Waiting has never been my strong point. I’m anxious, but don’t really suffer from anxiety. Good things come to those who wait isn’t at the top of my list of proverbs to live by. Do What Thou Wilt always has been, though; kind of a Just Do It for early 20th century Satanists, and me.It was with this mantra in the back of my mind th...

@brett's posts:

  1. More eye sex. »

  2. @ChrisO I’m sticking with my choice, but I do like that colour… »

Jump to: Scoring Guidelines • Prizes • Schedule • ResultsThe Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, your picks via the VSP Picks form above the posts section of the VSP Event article pertaining to the...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Yep, me too… »

Waiting has never been my strong point. I’m anxious, but don’t really suffer from anxiety. Good things come to those who wait isn’t at the top of my list of proverbs to live by. Do What Thou Wilt always has been, though; kind of a Just Do It for early 20th century Satanists, and me.It was with this mantra in the back of my mind th...

@brett's posts:

  1. @piwakawaka Seems you’re not the only one with DuraAce cassette issues… »

  2. The latest bit of Jaegher porn almost has me reconsidering my paint choice! Holy Toledo that’s nice… »

There are certain bicycle tools that once owned, signify much more than just ownership. For me, it was this Park clamp. No one starts out with a proper bike stand. For any cyclist, I see the early years of working on the bike as it leans up against the end of the bed. I also see no live-in girlfriend or second room to do this in. This era includes...

@brett's posts:

  1. We’ve got these clamps still in the shop, they work a treat. And I beg to differ on the bowling ball in a bar fight… Cyril used one to great affect in Breaking Away. »

White is a troublesome color; hard to keep clean. I have a white dress shirt that I never wear because even if I manage not to spill on the front of it, the cuffs and collar will look crap by the end of the day regardless. I mean, I can keep from eating something all day, but I can’t keep from drinking coffee or wine, and before very long som...

@brett's posts:

  1. @PeakInTwoYears Yep, Performance Soft Touch is the tits… »

Waiting has never been my strong point. I’m anxious, but don’t really suffer from anxiety. Good things come to those who wait isn’t at the top of my list of proverbs to live by. Do What Thou Wilt always has been, though; kind of a Just Do It for early 20th century Satanists, and me.It was with this mantra in the back of my mind th...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers I was thinking more the base colour with orange instead of red. And without the seat tube details. I still think it looks great though, but my colour is staying grey/V. »

  2. @piwakawaka But so, so right… (just requires changing the rest of your groupset. Easy.) »

  3. @markpa Mechanical. »