Velominati › The Community
Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: brett

Order: Keeper of the Cog

Social: Website

Whilst Brett hails from the land Down Under, he hates that fucking song. An Aussie now living as a Kiwi, he is at home on the rich dirt of New Zealand's mountain bike trails as he is on the scorching tarmac of Australia. Despite his geographical disadvantage, the cobblestones and kassien of Belgium and Northern France hold a special place in his heart and it's where you'll find him each Spring, either with a bike underneath him or a fine Belgian ale in his hand.

@brett's activity:

“You ruined a heap of photos!” Not the words you want to hear when the photos in question are ones you didn’t shoot, but were in. “How?” “You’re too low, too compressed.” At least he didn’t say I was ugly. “And you’re ugly.”When you work with professional photographers, you pic...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Charlie Kelly Welcome Charlie! Yes, that’s THE Charlie Kelly people. We’re not worthy… »

Before Tomac and Ned, before LeMond and Big Mig, there was Bob Hannah. For a young lad obsessed with motorcycles as well as bicycles, the ‘Hurricane’ was the epitome of style on a bike. His bright yellow Yamaha YZs and matching head-to-toe kit set the bar and inspired me to emulate not only his style on the bike, but off it too. If onl...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Dave R @shano92107 Yep, was a bit of a fan of the O Show back then, and when I started mountain biking I saw him in a mag and thought it was pretty cool that he pedalled too. Danny ‘Magoo’ Chandler seemed like the craziest mofo around when he hit the … »

  2. @ChrissyOne Bad. Ass. »

  3. @Chris Oh man, Maicos were the ‘want’ bike when we were kids… there was an old abandoned farm up the road from us, and the local hoons made a motocross track around it; it was like a scene from Mad Max (before it came out though) up there, dozens of b… »

It’s always a let down for a fan to realise his or her idol is not all that they were held up to be. And while I was somewhat a fan of Marco Pantani, it was neither a surprise nor a let-down to read about his troubled life, and his subsequent sad, lonely death.It wasn’t a surprise, or a let-down, to read that possibly his whole career w...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Deakus It’s winter down here! »

There are two ways in life to be good at something. The first way is the most obvious, which is to actually be good at something. This is harder than it sounds because you need things like skills, talent, fortitude, and light sabers. The other way doesn’t require those things but it has its own challenges; basically, you have to be holistical...

@brett's posts:

  1. I like the design of the POC helmets, but they are just so fucking BIG! No good for little faces like mine (and Marko’s)… *fucking the fuck right fucking off now, too. »

  2. Great article and conversation. I gotta say, I see some merit in the Giro New Road gear. I’ve tried the shorts, and they work well and look pretty good. Of course they’re not performance gear, but fuck, riding around with your mates isn’t performance rid… »

Maybe it’s the milestone of aging that I recently reached. It could be an awareness of the unique foibles of this sport/activity/pastime that I practice. Possibly, I just woke up one day and realised that this is a weird thing for a middle-aged man to be doing. The time for reassessment hit me, involuntarily and without warning. And I’m...

@brett's posts:

  1. @All I’d love to address each and every one of your posts individually, such are the great thoughts put forward by you all. It really warms the heart of my cockles to be a part of such a switched on community. This is why I ride, and will do so until a r… »

For the simple reason that the Cobbled and Ardennes Classics are behind us, I have not alternative but to get back on my soap box about the Giro being the best of the three Grand Tours. Well, usually, at least. Last year’s race sucked the big one (even if it was supremely Rule #9), but for the most part it is the race that is the most cl...

@brett's posts:

  1. @mouse I know people who know people. »

  2. Missed all the action last night, but sounds like it was all going on… my conclusions: Fuck Rogers, I don’t know how that piece of shit lies straight in bed at night. Spectators are becoming worse, not just for running and interfering, but they leave … »

  3. That was disgraceful. I’ve never seen so many Rule #82 violations. And one fucker wearing knee-high socks! (Ok, leg warmers rolled down, but still…) Style died today in Italy. »

“You ruined a heap of photos!” Not the words you want to hear when the photos in question are ones you didn’t shoot, but were in. “How?” “You’re too low, too compressed.” At least he didn’t say I was ugly. “And you’re ugly.”When you work with professional photographers, you pic...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Daccordi Rider Atherton Tablelands, North Queensland. »

  2. Probably the best trail riding I’ve seen (just skip the feelgood cliches at the start)…   »

  3. @RedRanger We tested the Klunker last year… it’s now our office beer run bike. »

  4. Better technique, but no Breeze… »

  5. One of the photos I ruined… talk about a muppet! Hartley’s Creek, North Queensland, photo Stefan Haworth (he’s not the accuser of ruin). »

For the simple reason that the Cobbled and Ardennes Classics are behind us, I have not alternative but to get back on my soap box about the Giro being the best of the three Grand Tours. Well, usually, at least. Last year’s race sucked the big one (even if it was supremely Rule #9), but for the most part it is the race that is the most cl...

@brett's posts:

  1. @il muro di manayunk @piwakawaka @ChrisO All fixed guys. After typing in ‘POZ’ a hundred times, sometimes we just hit the enter key out of frustration. Kinda like picking Pozzato to win anything… »

  2. VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps): 1. Evans 2. Q Tip 3. Pozzo-tiv 4. Henry Rolland 5. Salmon Sandwich »

Behind every great rider, there’s a great soigneur. The right hand man, the go-to guy, who tends every whim of his rider, feeding, watering, mending and massaging. Behind the humble Velominatus Regularus, however, there’s a string of injuries, tight muscles, bad posture and aching guns. We are our own soigneurs, and if you’re like...

@brett's posts:

  1. @Ccos Oh great, there’s a fart risk? »

  2. Ok, if the line in my article is offensive, then I apologise. Saying “I hear there’s some pretty good looking women at the yoga place” is merely a statement of fact. No different from one of our female community members (or Scaler) saying “Gee that Tommek… »

  3. @xced No. Just, no. »

For the simple reason that the Cobbled and Ardennes Classics are behind us, I have not alternative but to get back on my soap box about the Giro being the best of the three Grand Tours. Well, usually, at least. Last year’s race sucked the big one (even if it was supremely Rule #9), but for the most part it is the race that is the most cl...

@brett's posts:

  1. Martin has some serious bike handling issues… »

  2. VSP PICKS: 1. J Rod 2. Q Tip 3. Pozzo-tiv 4. Henry Rolland 5. Salmon Sandwich »

Here are a few lessons learned while in New York City.The Rapha store is an excellent place to begin a ride. It’s a killer bike shop with no bikes for sale. Once in the door there are ample places to rack a bike. Behold beautiful espressos, fresh croissants, bike racing projected on a whole wall, seats, tables, a WC, and evidently some nice kit f...

@brett's posts:

  1. Man, I would’ve loved to have been there (almost was). Thanks to everyone who showed up for what looked like a great ride and event, and to all of our community who have made this a great journey for us. »

The Amstel Gold Race, 251 km from Maastricht to Valkenburg, the hard way. There appears to be no flat sections longer than ten meters. There are thirty-four mean little climbs to ruin the legs. We have moved on from the real Spring Classics. There is no rest in this VSP; The Ronde and Roubaix were amazing but we must continue. Legs that are smoked...

@brett's posts:

  1. Goin old school on this one… Rebellin to do a Vino. VSP PICKS: 1. Rebellin 2. Cunego 3. Gilbert 4. Valverde 5. T5 »