Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: cipomarc

Order: Level 4 Velominatus

Location: Canada

@cipomarc's activity:

My favorite feeling is perhaps the empty hollowness of hunger. That statement, in itself, is a declaration of the privileged life I’ve led; it is borderline obscene to boast of such a thing in a world where 842 million people don’t have enough to eat. Nevertheless, being lucky enough to have been raised in America and just competent eno...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. In the video ‘The Road To Paris’ Lance eats a banana with his hot tea when he had to stop due to snow while out doing a mountain recon. »

  2. »

  3. It’s March and I’m not at my climbing weight, therefore I’m on a pharmaceutical cocktail made up of Xenical, Lorcaserin, Phentermine-Topiramate, Benzphetamine, and  Bontril Slow Release.    »

The illusion of transparency is perhaps the most important tool the Velominatus has in their toolbox, apart from having some measure of competence, being Casually Deliberate at all times, Looking Fantastic, and being able to dish out and endure heaping helpings of The V.Cycling is suffering, and one of the most crucial lessons we have to learn is t...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. I find it difficult staying calm sometimes when I’m jaded up on Amphetamines »

Strength can be a fickle thing this time of year, when the training isn’t as consistent as it should be; it comes and goes, sometimes several times in the span of a single ride or even a climb. Like a rosy-eyed dreamer I keep awakening as I train, thrown like a rag doll between a state nearing euphoria and one resembling purgatory.My mind is...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. I’m well into my third decade of road cycling, and don’t feel the need to ‘push through’ or  ’overcome’ anything. Oh, and fuck off Strava. »

We’re not really supposed to have favorites, but everyone does. Just ask your parents. So while I’m not supposed to have a favorite, I do, and its Rule #9.Bad weather immediately separates the wheat from the chaff, and so the weekend warriors stay indoors and leave the roads to the devout. I talk most often about riding in the rain, wi...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. Time to get serious now, you must be leaving for warm weather training within the next two weeks or else you might as well hang up the bike for another year. »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. @Marcus Really? It’s just a short way of calling someone a retard »

I’m compliant with Rule #74: no Garmin, no cyclometer, just an uncluttered cockpit. I’m not anti-data, if I could generate some awesome data I’d like to know about it. If I was racing I would train with data. I just got bored with looking at the numbers and not doing anything about them. When my Cateye cyclometer/heart rate monit...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. @sthilzy No, it was sometime last May. »

  2. Still going strong but only with SR44 watch batteries and not the SR44R rechargeable.   »

  3. Keep that goofy plastic mount off the retro bike’s stem »

  4. @poppapro Yea,  I remember back in the late 80′s/early 90′s hearing those guys at the bike shop looking for a cyclocomputer that wouldn’t zero out whenever it hit the 12hr mark on a ride. »

  5. Some of those guys in the photo are packing a bit of extra body weight, as said by me as I sit here keyboarding and drinking a glass of Paul Jaboulet Aîné Côtes du Rhône. »

  6. I really don’t like how that ‘tri-geek yuppie shit power based training’ has taken hold. »

  7. I’ve been a big Strava fan for the last couple of years but sometime this summer I really got sick of the FRED RACES and people giving kudos and comments like ” nice ride” when you just upload some two hour easy spin. Now I can have a nice warm down to my… »

I find it interesting to observe the chasm between parties engaged in a conversation, particularly in response to questions being asked. I’m thinking, at present, of the question, “How many bikes do you have?” My feelings in response are nothing short of complex and maybe a bit confused; reservation that I feel I should have a mo...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. Been riding over 35 years now, a bike is nothing more than a tool. One black bike is the same as another black bike. »

Somehow Movember and Vajanuary have slipped out of our grasp without too much fanfare. It’s never too late to pay homage to a ‘stash and a rider such as Urs Freuler. Our trusty cycling historian @wiscot has once again stepped up and delivered, many thanks. Yours in Cycling, Gianni Continue reading...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. Remember when the East German womens team had to shave their face twice a day? »

@steampunk dropped this beauty of a photo on us. Volumes being spoken here, none of which makes being a pro look so great. Thanks Steamy.VLVV, Gianni Continue reading...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. Even in a photo studio during the offseason posing for a cover shot Barry comes across looking drawn and wasted. »

The northwest has just experienced a spell of dry weather over two months long. It’s been enough to make a man sick.That’s all over now, thank Merckx. Commuting home today, I was caught off guard. No jacket, no gloves– nothing. A few drops hit, heavy and plump like ripe fruit. Then the drops became steady. By my half-way point, I...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. What it takes to win: »

I must admit to not having read most of the cycling memoirs in the Works. I may eventually but the local public library doesn’t carry any of them and never will so I’ll have to buy them or ask Frank to tote everything he has to Hawaii. I did get off my wallet and buy these two and it was money well spent. David Millar and Tyler Hamilton...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. I’d be lost without a good hit of Modafinil just before a hard ride   »

As children, none of us were given an allowance. Instead, we were taught from a young age that if we wanted to buy something, we had to earn the money in order to do so. To facilitate the model, and possibly to avoid child-labor law infringement, we were paid to do chores around the house in exchange for a cash payment directly proportional but not...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. I wish ER doctors would take the time to study all the various cycling shoe retension systems. Nothing worse than being laid out on the hospital bed badly concussed and trying to explain how to release a Sidi buckle just before they take the saw to it. »

  2. I still get out a few times with the old kit including the Detto Pietros »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. @Xyverz Only reason it’s so clean is that it was just freshly installed. I used the old french Tressosta Velox adhesive cotton bar tape, or as it says on the box ‘Super Tresse pour Guidons’. »

  2. Had two old riding buddies along with me on the ride today. This is the front Shamal Sun Star shinning on the pavement »

  3. @Oli Yea, it’s really good not to react what-so-ever if someone does something on purpose, that way you deny them of any kind of gratification. When they look back in the mirror and see you taking a sip from your water bottle instead of waving your arms o… »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@cipomarc's posts:

  1. I’m going to have to bend a rule a wee bit. The velcro straps on a pair of my shoes are getting a bit iffy. Will have to revert to wearing Lycra shoe covers on them to keep the straps in place. Not to worry, I know what I’m doing. »