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Velominatus: harminator

Order: Level 1 Velominatus

"We used to live in a rolled up newspaper in a septic tank." Found the bike relatively late in life after a mis-spent youth. Now cured, living northern Sydney, soaking up the serenity and agony of the local gorges... Married, 2 kids, school teacher (design & tech) renovating the house and running the school MTB program.

@harminator's activity:

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@harminator's posts:

  1. Merckxy Xmas and a Coppi New Year to all you genii, freaks and weirdos. Ride hard and drink good grog. And don’t eat anything you can’t lift. Massive thanks to all the Keepers for your beautiful hard work. You have made the world a better place. »

Either CO2 cannisters or mini-pumps should be carried in jersey pockets (See Rule #31). The only exception to this rule is to mount a Silca brand frame pump in the rear triangle of the frame, with the rear wheel skewer as the pump mount nob, as demonstrated by members of the 7-Eleven and Ariostea pro cycling teams. As such, a frame pump mounted u...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy Yep. Valve cores unscrewing is a well documented problem. Add in that the user needs to adapt valves to suit pump = bad design. Further, the swivel action of the chuck is super stiff when there’s pressure in the hose making chuck removal… »

  2. @Gianni I will never pay $450 for any floor pump. End of. Word. Bernard would never clone nine CsOTHO. Merckx forbid the thought. »

  3. I will never mount a pump on any frame I ride. End of. In contrast to your praise of the Silca, the Lezyne floor pump which I paid for in full has been a major disappointment. It Looks Fantastic in every way but performs like Challenger. Bad O rings. »

I think it would be hard for anyone to make the case that Eddy Merckx was Roger de Vlaeminck’s Cycling Sensei, but I think we can all agree that De Vlaeminck was a student of Merckx, if only a student of his domination. But every student at some point becomes the master, and the driven student will always challenge the Order of Things.Eve...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @razmaspaz #brakes »

  2. But you just know Eddy is thinking “If you pinch flat I’m leaving without you.” »

  3. Thanks Frank. A lovely piece. »

Jump to: Scoring Guidelines • Prizes • Schedule • ResultsThe Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, your picks via the VSP Picks form above the posts section of the VSP Event article pertaining to the...

@harminator's posts:

  1. Barry is Barnes, I am Red. »

We want to look like Pros, sure, but what we’re really after is feeling Pro. All the aesthetics are just a tool we use to fuel the fickle internal combustion engine of Morale. In the end, there is little that will make you feel Pro more than clattering along a stretch of cobbles in a small group; instant “select breakaway”. One...

@harminator's posts:

  1. Look at the state of those cobbles! »

I’m trying my best to stay thin this winter, but I’m nowhere near where I was when it was warm and the days were long. I keep flashing back to the last time I felt genuinely skinny and declared to myself, “This time, I’ll keep it off!”This photo is a metaphor. Winter me is on the right, Summer me is on the left. Mi...

@harminator's posts:

  1. I think The Prophet looks a bit guilty because he accidentally rubbed against the Michelin Man and his nipples went hard. »

Jump to: Scoring Guidelines • Prizes • Schedule • ResultsThe Velominati Super Prestige is a season-long competition wherein readers will be submitting their predictions for the top five finishers of each qualifying race.  In order to qualify, your picks via the VSP Picks form above the posts section of the VSP Event article pertaining to the...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @ped Too busy googling himself to play the quiz. At least 10 guesses from me this week. Happy with my VI. »

I don’t mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that’s how it comes out. - Bill Hicks That famous quote from the Greatest Comedian Of All Time™ has resonated with me for many years. It became my silent mantra, as I don’t suffer fools gladly and sometimes don’t make much effort to conceal the fact. Lately, I̵...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @CerveloVan I’m not sure who you’re responding to but if its @brett’s article then you should read it again. I just did and it all seems pretty reasonable to me. So some questions to the “grown ups”: How would Paula Radcliffe react if you showed up for … »

Waiting has never been my strong point. I’m anxious, but don’t really suffer from anxiety. Good things come to those who wait isn’t at the top of my list of proverbs to live by. Do What Thou Wilt always has been, though; kind of a Just Do It for early 20th century Satanists, and me.It was with this mantra in the back of my mind th...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @RobSandy This. Although it doesn’t hurt to stand next to Harry Highpants. (Don’t mention the ears!) »

  2. @gaswepass I have one of those. It was way to fluorescent when it was new but has toned down over time. Now the shade of orange is about right. But now it offends the Principle of Silence. Fucker. »

  3. Hot enough to pull a comment from Oli. (For the Lexicon?) »

The Ride. It is the cathedral of our sport, where we worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. It is the end to our means. Indeed, The Bike may be the central tool to our sport, but to turn the pedals is to experience the sensation of freedom, of flight. It is all for The Ride.The world is overflowing with small, twisty roads that capture ou...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @ChrisO Really? Those numbers correct? If so that’s one hellish crosswind. Shame about the outcome for you. Sounds like a huge effort and a noble sacrifice. So are you re-evaluating your race program or quitting the team all together? »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @Mikael Liddy They could have centered the bars. Are the bars centered? I don’t think they’re centered… »

We want to look like Pros, sure, but what we’re really after is feeling Pro. All the aesthetics are just a tool we use to fuel the fickle internal combustion engine of Morale. In the end, there is little that will make you feel Pro more than clattering along a stretch of cobbles in a small group; instant “select breakaway”. One...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @Ron Smoothing the Domestic Cobbles. Now there’s a lofty goal. »

  2. Keepers Tour or new record gruppo and HED stinger 5’s. Discuss. »

It doesn’t take a genius to see what’s going on here. Rule #5, Rule #9, Rule #10; every rider in this frame Looks Fantastic (most other Rules). The riders are in short sleeves and shorts while the public apparently has scavenged materials from rubbish bins and the local grain elevator in a very visually unpleasant effort to keep war...

@harminator's posts:

  1. Peiper far left, Thevenet 3rd from left… »

  2. @wiscot Definitey Millar in the middle. Looks like Sean Yates following behind him and possibly Anderson obscured behind Millar. For the trio to the left we need Oli…but they have their stroke all together magnificently. »

  3. The ride will start soon enough… »

Whenever you see one of those yellow cars or motorcycles laden with spare wheels and manned by efficiently deliberate young professionals with no allegiance or favour to any one rider, take a moment to reflect on the oft-overlooked pioneer of the neutral service as we know it today, M. Jacques Mavic.Usually only sighted once a year in July, Jacq...

@harminator's posts:

  1. @wilburrox No treasure trench there. Are you Irish by chance? I tried searching the site for the IPTT thread to no avail. But the keywords do link to interesting pages. I don’t think I could repeat it and do it justice. I need more time… »

  2. @wilburrox Yes. Perhaps you could start by checking your bike for an Irish Pirate Treasure Trench. »

  3. Incredible! I’ve just read his autobiography – “Jacky Mavvy – Under Pressure.” Amazing story. One of eight children adopted at birth by a turnip farming couple from Turnais who hated kids but needed “shoveleurs”. But he sliced off all the toes of his rig… »