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Velominatus: scaler911

Order: Gray Order Velominatus

Location: Vancouver WA

Cat II (USA Cycling), Cat III (OBRA), also weekend warrior/ armchair cycling critic.

@scaler911's activity:

The Whale Shark is the biggest nonmammalian vertebrate* on the planet, rivaling the dinosaurs for size. How do you feed yourself when you’re that huge without loading up on carbs all the time? Easy, you swim around with your mouth wide open for 22 hours a day and hope enough food swims in there to take the edge off the hunger pangs. Cycl...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. However, if you’re trying to ‘break’ a guy next to you, closing the mouth for a few breaths, and looking at your rival with a wry smile, is a way to break souls. But in the meantime, it’s the best way to get air to the blood. How’s it been going around t… »

Attention all Velominati. The Tour VSP is going on line and it should be a good one. Sure, between Froomy and Bertie a person could hedge their bets but Moviestar is all in for Valverde, BMC for TeeJay, Astana for the Shark and Garmin is finally committing to a team leader in Talansky. Some other teams (ahem…Trek Factory Racing for one) have...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Zoomy is going to have an off day and fall off the podium in the 3rd week. TJ is gonna have a fab ride, but not quite get to the top step (next year). Andrew is looking good. J-Rod will take some stages in the mountains, and be in the top 10, but his lack… »

Why are women’s races run concurrently with men’s races? I would get it if it was the women’s Tour de France, but I don’t get it when it is the women’s Giro in July. Since the Tour de Swiss there has been a lack of stage racing (in my TV watching schedule) and seemingly a perfect time to present a women’s stage r...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Go get ‘em girls! VSP PICKS: 1. Abbott 2. Vos 3. Stevens 4. Pooley 5. Longo-Borghini »

Maui Velominatus Dave is tapering for this Saturday’s Cycle to the Sun. It is more mass start, time trial to the sun as there is nothing like 3.3 km of continual climbing to sort everyone out by their power to weight ratios. After 2 km of climbing there is no pack and no draft. Everyone climbs as hard as they can and almost everyone is riding alo...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. @frank So busy, so much to read, too little time. But if I was going to put my thoughts on this fine article into words of my own, I’d just be repeating Frank. »

Climbing is something I enjoy more than I am good at it; any time I see a new road pointing up to the heavens, I find myself irresistibly drawn to explore where it leads. Every season I come to the conclusion that my training routes are all very hilly and I arrive at the brilliant idea that I should plot out a new course which seeks out the flatt...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Climbing. What other reason is there to ride our bikes? »

The Tour de Suisse can be everyone’s warm-up for the Tour de France, including all you VSP dreamers. The big show seems to be the Critérium de Dauphanié this year, as far as Tour de France contenders go but the Tour de Suisse still has some big guns showing up. Twiggo is here, not for a Tour warm up, unless people are worried about Richie P...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. The tea leaves show The Mod Father throwing down to prove a point with Sky. Costa may get a stage, but not the overall. Toss up between Rohan and Frank for 5th. VSP PICKS: 1. Wiggo 2. Costa 3. Mollema 4. Kreuziger 5. Rohan »

There are two ways in life to be good at something. The first way is the most obvious, which is to actually be good at something. This is harder than it sounds because you need things like skills, talent, fortitude, and light sabers. The other way doesn’t require those things but it has its own challenges; basically, you have to be holistical...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. @unversio Don’t despair all. When I head out to MN for the Heck of the North I’ll be having a word with that lid. I’m planning on crushing it, running it through a chipper and burning the rest. I’ll put the remains lovingly in a Urn, and give it back t… »

There was a time when I held down ‘real jobs’. Jobs with (a little) stress, with (some) responsibility, but without soul. And while dealing with the great unwashed public never held much appeal, I always envied the guys who worked at my preferred LBS. They seemingly had it all––an endless supply of cheap bikes and parts, hanging out and s...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. When I first started racing, I started hanging around our LBS owned by Hans, an old Dutch guy with a very thick accent. As time went on, I got to know the manager (became good enough friends I was a groomsman at his wedding), and the other wrenches. After… »

Maybe it’s the milestone of aging that I recently reached. It could be an awareness of the unique foibles of this sport/activity/pastime that I practice. Possibly, I just woke up one day and realised that this is a weird thing for a middle-aged man to be doing. The time for reassessment hit me, involuntarily and without warning. And I’m...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Brett, I was a product of this very thing. I discovered cycling in my early 20′s, got good at it pretty quickly and next thing I knew I was a Cat II, close to Cat I. The training dialed way up as I hoped to get on the national stage. I’d cooked through a … »

I don’t know how a guy who shows off the better part of a half meter of seat post comes to the conclusion that his saddle is too low, but that precise thought occupies an enormous amount of time. Ever closer looms the minimum insertion point on my seat pin, yet I am irrevocably bound to explore its limits.I actually wish my legs were shorter...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. @frank Drunk writing again? I noticed a few, but didn’t matter. »

  2. I tweak around with my saddle height a lot. Made a big move up this spring, and while it seemed to help my power up hills (no idea if it did in actual watts, I don’t use a power meter), it made the upper part of my calves pretty sore. Guess I wasn’t engag… »

This note arrived to the Velominati Bunker back in April. It was a confession. It was a cautionary one. Everyone knows someone who has done this. I nearly did it myself*. I replied to Alex, not sympathetically enough yet his message has stayed with me. Is this worthy of a New Rule? Yours in Cycling, Gianni Continue reading...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. @Buck Rogers Yep. Was on my way home from a race, going to a buddies, dropped into the local grocery store for like 10min. Came out and you know how you look for your car in a crowded parking lot by looking for your bike on top? Well, it wasn’t there. … »

  2. Good Rule. While I’ve not had the pleasure of ripping my bikes off the roof of the car, I have many friends who have. Sucks for them, mild comedy for me. (isn’t comedy just laughing at other peoples tragedy?) I did however have my entire roof rack stole… »

I met a nice character a few weeks ago on a magnificent ride through the Bay Area. He rode a Colnago C-50 which was so filthy that I was unable to ascertain with any degree of certainty what color it was painted. I spent most of the ride suppressing the impulse to lead him and his bike through a local car wash. As it turns out, he’s based o...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Have to give that a look. I usually wash the bike with Simple Green, then polish up the bits with an Armor All wipe (except the seat of course). »

“You ruined a heap of photos!” Not the words you want to hear when the photos in question are ones you didn’t shoot, but were in. “How?” “You’re too low, too compressed.” At least he didn’t say I was ugly. “And you’re ugly.”When you work with professional photographers, you pic...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Try again. Wonky WiFi today. »

  2. Your’s truly on my way to a Silver Medal in the Oregon State Championships, my only MTB race ever, and on a rented Kona. Did the photographer get it right? I don’t know. Slideshow: Fullscreen: Download: Powered by DM Albums™ »

This guest post was sent to us from Frank’s sister about her son Willem. When I read the post I was thinking Frank’s sister had written it and that all Stracks have the same dreamy cyclo-centric writing style, damn them all. But, as usual, I was wrong. Frank’s sister did write this:This was written by my friend Dan, who took Wille...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Such a great read! As others have already said, chapeau to young Willems determination and writing! I grew up outside of a small rural farming town where the “real men (kids)” played typical ‘Murican sports: football, baseball, basketball and perhaps wre… »

Anecdotal research suggests that people are being let off-leash without adequate training to perform basic activities such as walking on sidewalks or through airports and busy city centers. I’m assuming this expands to shopping malls, but I never go there so I can’t be sure. It’s easy to blame the mobile phones which apparentl...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. This seems like the right place to ask: What kind of maths does one use to explain the phenomon wherein when you’re on a MUP (miles of it) on a nice weekday morning with few other users; you, the lady jogging with her stroller, and the old guy riding at y… »

  2. Nice one Frank. We’ve all become too self absorbed to give a flying fuck about anyone but ourselves. Which is sad quite honestly. I’m guessing that all this tech and instant updates to things takes the old skool act of actually chatting to the person nex… »

I can can feel his cold breath on my back, like a shadow drifting through an alleyway. He’s not yet upon me, but the Man with the Hammer is lurking nearby. I’m not even sure he has the intention to strike; he’s just staying close, cruelly reminding me that my fate is in his hands.I feel the heaviness in my legs from the first turn...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. The best article yet. Serious. 9.998/10 (because we all want to strive for more, right?). Nothing else to say. »

Behind every great rider, there’s a great soigneur. The right hand man, the go-to guy, who tends every whim of his rider, feeding, watering, mending and massaging. Behind the humble Velominatus Regularus, however, there’s a string of injuries, tight muscles, bad posture and aching guns. We are our own soigneurs, and if you’re like...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. We should strive to take some good care of ourselves. Bretto I’m just like you; Even when I was young and running middle distance in HS and was forced to stretch, I never really limbered up. Wired wrong for it I suppose.  That said, I do self-soigneur at … »

For the simple reason that the Cobbled and Ardennes Classics are behind us, I have not alternative but to get back on my soap box about the Giro being the best of the three Grand Tours. Well, usually, at least. Last year’s race sucked the big one (even if it was supremely Rule #9), but for the most part it is the race that is the most cl...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. Here we go boys! VSP PICKS: 1. Quintana 2. Cuddles 3. J Rod 4. Duran Duran 5. Red Ryder »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.The Rules lie at the beginning of The Path to La Vie Velominatus, not at the end; learning to balance them against one another and to welcome them...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. @unversio +1. That is all. »

Despite the proclivity towards being all-knowing that comes as a consequence of my being Dutch, the most beautiful things in life are discoveries that come as a result of not knowing. We are quick to answer but slow to think; the easy solution lies at our fingertips while the true mystery lurks just beyond, ready to reveal her secrets if only we a...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. There are so many undiscovered roads. Even where I live and think I’ve ridden all of them within 200Km of my house. It’s fantastic to head out with just a gauge sense of where you want to go, then get lost. I’ve found many new places to ride doing that. … »

Here are a few lessons learned while in New York City.The Rapha store is an excellent place to begin a ride. It’s a killer bike shop with no bikes for sale. Once in the door there are ample places to rack a bike. Behold beautiful espressos, fresh croissants, bike racing projected on a whole wall, seats, tables, a WC, and evidently some nice kit f...

@scaler911's posts:

  1. This whole thing: the site, the book, but mostly the people here. It just continues to blow my mind. I’m just glad someone pointed me in this direction. *Awesomeness* »