Velominati Community Profile Archive

Velominatus: wiscot

Order: Guest Contributor

Location: West Bend, Wisconsin

I got my first bike at age 2 and have always had one since. My first real bike was a massive steel blue Peugeot at the age of 14. Subsequently replaced by a red Holdsworth, a team-colors Raleigh and a ruby-red Colnago, the latter joined by a neon-pink Cougar TT bike, a metallic green Brian Rouke winter bike and a blue Specialized mountain bike. All steel and all gone to new homes now. I joined the Johnstone Wheelers Cycling Club at 18 and became a dedicated time triallist, riding 30-50 club and open races a year. In 1989/90 I was a founding member of the short-lived VC d"Or which included velominatus and short-lived COTHO teammate Brian Smith. I also raced regularly against another real Velominatus - Graeme Obree - in the 1980s and beat him twice - once in a 10 and once in a 50. Rumors that he stopped to have a drum up at the turn are probably true. Moved to the US in 1990. Buggered up my back (working for a bike shop ironically) in 1993. Took several years off. Back riding since 2006 in Wisconsin and logging 8000+ kilometers each of the last three years.

@wiscot's activity:

I’m not sure what ketamine based drugs Buck is stealing and abusing right now but he sure is excited about another Too Much on 100 Cogal. Everyone who wants to live the Rule #5 life, line up here. -gianniThe 2013 200-on-100 Cogal, or for the crazy bastards repeating it from last year, The 400-on-100 Cogal (aka The Buck Rogers Knee Memorial r...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Defender3I’m not sure what ketamine based drugs Buck is stealing and abusing right now but he sure is excited about another Too Much on 100 Cogal. Everyone who wants to live the Rule #5 life, line up here. -gianni

    The 2013 200-on-100 Cogal, or for the crazy bastards repeating it from last year, The 400-on-100 Cogal (aka The Buck Rogers Knee Memorial ride, The Steampuck Gastro Memorial Ride, The What the Fuck Was I thinking Memorial Ride).

    On Thursday, June 21st starting at V after V (actual time of sunrise-How Velominati is that?!?) in North Troy, VT the second annual 200-on-100 Cogal will kick off for another crazy, painful, endorphin-induced-hallucinogenic filled, long ass day in the saddle. Last year was amazingly awesome. I will not wax all nostalgic about it. Watch the Ryan Kelly video, read the Cogal page from last year, check out the strava links: It speaks for itself.

    I will be driving support in my new-to-me 1984 12 passenger Land Rover Defender 110 with the big ass roof rack which is a right hand drive so I should be able to hand out bidons and drive all at the same time! It will also have plenty of room in case anyone gets injured and needs to bail. Rob has thrown his hat in for possibly driving a support wagon as well so support should be covered.

    Logistics will be ironed out as the time approaches and hopefully Roger, aka The 200-on-100 MAN, will help with the planning as he did last year but this time around he is NOT allowed to pay for anything!!!

    So be there and be pedaling square by day’s end or regret it for the next 12 months! It’s going to be Fooockin’ Awwwesome (insert Djibouti Dub Video here).”

    I still need to find the Djibouti Dub video but I attached the picture of my Velo Support Wagon, BABY!

    I think that this is the link for Djubouti but I cannot open it at work as it is banned! www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOmvdeNa67E

    If you do not know Djubouti Dubs, you missing out. Just google them, but not at work!

    Thanks!

    Buck

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - June 20, 2013
    5:05 AM - 10:05 PM

    Location
    Troy School

    Cogal Details
    Route Details


Every once in a while, you stumble across a quote that changes your outlook on how you approach life. Of course, this requires that one does a good deal of “reading”, which is a problem for me, as reading anything that isn’t Cycling-related feels the same as doing “work”. I do the odd bit of it nevertheless, and in a r...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @the Engine Wait, you mean you’ve had TWO sunny days in Scotland this year? (This one and the Cogal) Hells bells, must be a lot of wee lassies running around with 3r degree burns after exposing their lily-white flesh to the sun. I think if you get three… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @sanspareil That is a beauty! Wow! In classic orange, white and blue too! My first real road bike was a big-ass red Holdsworth. It never, ever looked as good as that! »

This photo is perhaps the greatest of all time; it shows The Prophet riding in the 1969 Ronde van Vlaanderen, kit and machine perfect. Rule #9 conditions in abundance. He’s gone off the front with some 80km left to race, which predictably sent his directeur into a rage. Ordered to return to the bunch, Merckx calmly suggested he go screw hi...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @frank So you only rode for an hour then drank lots of beer? Hardly Rule #5 compatible.Where are your priorities FFS? »

  2. Merckx, I remember the 82 Worlds. I was still in the UK at the time and badly wanted Kelly to win. Last km he was still in with a chance even though Boyer was away. Then Lemond chased his own teammate down! Saronni was on Greg’s when then – woosh! – went … »

The mighty VSP generator has been switched on once again. The mil-spec hydraulic fluid has been changed since the Giro. A new power take-off belt has also been installed. And the punch card reader has been refurbished.Broome and Berti are already riding the Critérium du Dauphiné. The top contenders prefer the Dauphiné for the decent recovery all...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Spectacularly bad picks. Must. Try. Harder. »

Every once in a while, you stumble across a quote that changes your outlook on how you approach life. Of course, this requires that one does a good deal of “reading”, which is a problem for me, as reading anything that isn’t Cycling-related feels the same as doing “work”. I do the odd bit of it nevertheless, and in a r...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Nate Is that a drawing of you or Cyclops? Are they acquainted? »

  2. @Chris Love how the drinks are lined up to maximize sponsor visibility – especially the Ba-Bru! Love the card too – All the Other Dad’s are Weird. Pretty rich considering their dad is a velominatus! Weirdness – it’s all a matter of perspective. »

Update: You can watch the live stream (assuming it works from the velodrome) on the Velominati channel at USTREAM. When you log in, you’ll first see my little test video of my puppy eating grass. Please disregard me yelling at it. That never happened.I have always considered myself to have a good imagination, something I attribute half to my...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Late comment here, but chapeau to Frank on a sterling effort at Alpenrose. A tough challenge made tougher by letting everyone on this site know he was doing it too. Seriously though, would it have killed you to do a measly extra 6000 meters? »

This week’s Guest Article comes from our friend, @blacktoolpower (l) and our editor Drummond Moir (r). In anticipation of our book’s imminent release, these two donned their lab coats and headed out to the streets of London to assess the state of Rule Compliance in the city’s commuter crowd. Always remember: leave this kind of ins...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @strathlubnaig You’re right,. In Paisley you’d be lucky to get away with the most terrifying death stare ever. »

  2. @Mike_P I’m sure there would be abundant violators in Edinburgh, but I wouldn’t recommend going to Glasgow or Paisley and going up to a punter and measuring his socks or giving him a ticket for mis-matched tires, bar tape and saddlle. “:Good afternoon … »

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @xyxax Maybe if you work at one of those trendy modern hi-tech companies, it might be seen as modish. I work in the arts and if I ever pulled such a stunt would be mocked/laughed out of the room. »

The Ride. It is the cathedral of our sport, where we worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. It is the end to our means. Indeed, The Bike may be the central tool to our sport, but to turn the pedals is to experience the sensation of freedom, of flight. It is all for The Ride.The world is overflowing with small, twisty roads that capture ou...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @Nate That’s a fine feeling indeed! One charity ride I do in the fall out of Sheboygan has cheerleaders to welcome you home. It’s kinda embarassing but kinda nice. Would be nice to have it after every ride but I think the neighbors might object. On th… »

Date/Time: 8th June 2013Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the l...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Date/Time: 8th June 2013

    Location:  Magdalen Yard Road Car Park, Dundee, DD1 4NB
    Route Details:  170km starting in Dundee, reaching Cairn ‘O’ Mount, over the top riding a wee loop then back over and home to Dundee.

    Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the legs it’s over the top and round a small loop before coming back over the Mount to then stop at The Clattering Brig for refreshments. Option Two is to ride up to the top, turn around and wait for those going over at TCB. The third Option is to just stop at The Clattering Brig and not take on the climb but I hope no-one chooses this option. Then the party of Velominati will travel back to the Car Park where showering facilities will be available at my place as well as some food before we walk a short distance for the recovery beverages. The long route climbing the Cairn ‘O’ Mount from both sides is about 170km. All welcome.

    VLVV

    snoov

     

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - June 08, 2013
    8:40 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Magdalen Yard Road Car Park

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

We are the Keepers of the Cog. In so being, we also maintain the sacred text wherein lie the simple truths of cycling etiquette known as The Rules. It is in our trust to maintain and endorse this list.See also The Prophet’s Prayer. Continue reading...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @strathlubnaig Is that bike resting against the concrete on its seatpost? Merckx H. Christ that’s wrong, wrong, wrong! Also, is that a double stack of LEDs on the seatpost? On a brilliant sunny day? Lord help us! Bidons are unmatched too. »

Date/Time: 8th June 2013Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the l...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Date/Time: 8th June 2013

    Location:  Magdalen Yard Road Car Park, Dundee, DD1 4NB
    Route Details:  170km starting in Dundee, reaching Cairn ‘O’ Mount, over the top riding a wee loop then back over and home to Dundee.

    Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the legs it’s over the top and round a small loop before coming back over the Mount to then stop at The Clattering Brig for refreshments. Option Two is to ride up to the top, turn around and wait for those going over at TCB. The third Option is to just stop at The Clattering Brig and not take on the climb but I hope no-one chooses this option. Then the party of Velominati will travel back to the Car Park where showering facilities will be available at my place as well as some food before we walk a short distance for the recovery beverages. The long route climbing the Cairn ‘O’ Mount from both sides is about 170km. All welcome.

    VLVV

    snoov

     

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - June 08, 2013
    8:40 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Magdalen Yard Road Car Park

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

The Ride. It is the cathedral of our sport, where we worship at the altar of the Man with the Hammer. It is the end to our means. Indeed, The Bike may be the central tool to our sport, but to turn the pedals is to experience the sensation of freedom, of flight. It is all for The Ride.The world is overflowing with small, twisty roads that capture ou...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @scaler911 I did restrain myself from yelling “Obey the Rules! Obey Rule #42 people!” There were way more of them than me. »

  2. Had a scary moment on Saturday. Was doing a 200kms charity ride out of Oostburg, WI. At Elkhart Lake I ran into what was, I think, a biathlon or triathlon. Roads blocked off, cops, crowds. Managed to slip through unscathed and unaffiliated. While not wear… »

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.It seems in s...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. @andrew Fine looking ride there Andrew. Welcome to the fold. »

It’s not a secret around these parts that William Fotheringham is my favorite Cycling journalist. Growing up as a budding Velominatus in the isolated island known as North America, I could count on one hand the publications that even mentioned Cycling, let alone provided reliable coverage. Winning Magazine and Velonews were my source for race...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. So if William Fortheringham wrote the intro, was Pippa Middleton too busy with her ever burgeoning literary career? Or did she think that being a member of the aristocracy and +1 to Royalty, that Rules didn’t apply to her? »

Update: You can watch the live stream (assuming it works from the velodrome) on the Velominati channel at USTREAM. When you log in, you’ll first see my little test video of my puppy eating grass. Please disregard me yelling at it. That never happened.I have always considered myself to have a good imagination, something I attribute half to my...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. C’mon guys. You really think Frank would be doing this if he didn’t know he wasn’t going to make an arse of himself? I”m pretty sure he’s given this his full Dutch Monkey OCD level of inspection and prep. He might not have ben training on the tack (as fa… »

Date/Time: 8th June 2013Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the l...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Date/Time: 8th June 2013

    Location:  Magdalen Yard Road Car Park, Dundee, DD1 4NB
    Route Details:  170km starting in Dundee, reaching Cairn ‘O’ Mount, over the top riding a wee loop then back over and home to Dundee.

    Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the legs it’s over the top and round a small loop before coming back over the Mount to then stop at The Clattering Brig for refreshments. Option Two is to ride up to the top, turn around and wait for those going over at TCB. The third Option is to just stop at The Clattering Brig and not take on the climb but I hope no-one chooses this option. Then the party of Velominati will travel back to the Car Park where showering facilities will be available at my place as well as some food before we walk a short distance for the recovery beverages. The long route climbing the Cairn ‘O’ Mount from both sides is about 170km. All welcome.

    VLVV

    snoov

     

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - June 08, 2013
    8:40 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Magdalen Yard Road Car Park

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

  2. Date/Time: 8th June 2013

    Location:  Magdalen Yard Road Car Park, Dundee, DD1 4NB
    Route Details:  170km starting in Dundee, reaching Cairn ‘O’ Mount, over the top riding a wee loop then back over and home to Dundee.

    Meeting at the Car Park near where I live which is free at VV to nine. We’ll then roll into town for a coffee stop at Empire State Coffee which serves the best coffee in Dundee according to the VMH. Then we ride all the way up to Cairn ‘O’ Mount at which point there are several options. For those with the legs it’s over the top and round a small loop before coming back over the Mount to then stop at The Clattering Brig for refreshments. Option Two is to ride up to the top, turn around and wait for those going over at TCB. The third Option is to just stop at The Clattering Brig and not take on the climb but I hope no-one chooses this option. Then the party of Velominati will travel back to the Car Park where showering facilities will be available at my place as well as some food before we walk a short distance for the recovery beverages. The long route climbing the Cairn ‘O’ Mount from both sides is about 170km. All welcome.

    VLVV

    snoov

     

    Event Details

    Loading Map....

    Date/Time
    Date - June 08, 2013
    8:40 AM - 8:30 PM

    Location
    Magdalen Yard Road Car Park

    Cogal Details
    Route Details

    Ride Classification

Update: You can watch the live stream (assuming it works from the velodrome) on the Velominati channel at USTREAM. When you log in, you’ll first see my little test video of my puppy eating grass. Please disregard me yelling at it. That never happened.I have always considered myself to have a good imagination, something I attribute half to my...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. Frank, I assume it goes without saying that you’ll be wearing an old school hair net helmet and not a modern-type effort? »

The mighty VSP generator has been switched on once again. The mil-spec hydraulic fluid has been changed since the Giro. A new power take-off belt has also been installed. And the punch card reader has been refurbished.Broome and Berti are already riding the Critérium du Dauphiné. The top contenders prefer the Dauphiné for the decent recovery all...

@wiscot's posts:

  1. VSP PICKS: 1. Dan martin 2. Van Garderen 3. J Tiernan LLocke 4. Spilak 5. Kreuzinger »