Attention all hands, attention all hands. The first Scottish Cogal has been scheduled. It sounds endlessly fun, punishing and exciting. The malted beverage recovery fluid will be outstanding. It has to be, it’s Scotland. Please note, post-cogal reports have to include photos and description of said malted beverage environs. -gianni
Route will be Callander south on the A81 over the Braes of Greenock to Aberfoyle, back north over the Duke’s Pass A821 (10% in places) then left at Loch Achray and along the banks of Loch Katrine, on a road that is only open to local motorised traffic, to Stonachlachar and then south along the B829 back to Aberfoyle. Through Aberfoyle along the A81 to Strathblane (this road can sometimes be busy in places), then left (east) along the A891 to Lennoxtown and then sharp left back north along the B822 Crow Road (proper torture). At Fintry take the right to continue along the B822 to Kippen, then straight through Kippen across the roundabout on the main road continuing along the B822 to Thornhill. At Thornhill continue north to pick up the A81 to Callander and Malted Recovery Beverage.
The back of my cigarette packet suggests that this is around 160kms – but I might be wrong. In case of apocalyptic weather beyond Rule #10 (we had hurricane force winds here twice last year and our roads have a tendency to flood in places) there are a number of points where the route can be cut short with some logic.
This being Scotland it will be Casually Deliberate and a short period of Waiting Properly is expected at the off as well. We have some PMU rubber hands at the ready so some junior Engines may be employed to make a proper crowd scene and set the tone. Pictures will be taken and posted on the site so Looking Pro and Fantastic is the only way to roll.
Mrs Engine will supply ribald remarks and (more usefully) a sag wagon if any Velominatus actually shows imminent signs of expiring. There is also the possibility of food being thrown at us en route by the said Mrs Engine.
We can accommodate two Velominati (or possibly four if they are very friendly with each other) should the consumption of Malted Recovery Beverage mean that driving home afterwards isn’t possible. There’s also places to lay your head in town that we can provide info on should the need arise. Post ride food is also available chez Engine provided numbers are sub 10 if not then, given ample warning of numbers, we’ll think of something.
As always – this is guys and gals meeting on the road for a bike ride – if you come to grief please refer to Rule #5.
If you’re doing anything other than turning up and going home please drop me a text on 07799 690390 or send an email on email@example.com and make your needs known so that we have a fighting chance of making the Scottish Cogal a day to remember for all the right reasons.