Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Ronde van Vlaanderen 2016

Everybody knows there are two kinds of cobbles. Big cobbles, little cobbles, grippy cobbles, and slippy cobbles. And when it comes to mastering the stones, no one is better than the undisputed King of the Cobbles, Kenny Van Vlaminck. And speaking of cobble legends, there is a great piece on our friend Johan Museeuw over on Rouleur today.

According to the weather reports, there is going to be wind and rain on Sunday. And if you watched the live coverage of Gent Wevelgem last week, the storm that blew in after the race was wicked intense. And, since I’ve decided not to visit Belgium this year, you can be pretty sure that the weather will finally be rubbish. You’re welcome.

We rode the RVV route (the classic route, not the crap new one) in the wind, rain, and hail a few years back, and it was striking how slippy the cobbles on the Paterberg and Koppenberg are in the wet. These climbs are borderline doable in the dry, and if you need to get out of the saddle for some extra juice, it is going to take some good bike handling to keep from spinning out.

And don’t forget we’ve got wicked prizes on offer; Don Walker is giving a free custom steel frame to the winner of the VSP overall, and Café Roubaix is awarding a set of their CR Wheelworks Arenberg wheelsets to the runner-up. Third place gets a free V-Kit. Boom. So get prognosticating and get your picks in before the clock goes to zero. Good luck!


[vsp_results id=”40388″/]

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306 Replies to “Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s Ronde van Vlaanderen 2016”

  1. whoops, forgot to put in a Belgian Hardman – here’s the correction with GVA in place

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. G.Van Avermaet
    3. Cancellara
    4. Terpstra
    5. Kristoff
  2. How to pick? I’d love to see GT take it but I don’t see it. I’ll keep him in my top five.

    Aside from that, Sags and Fabs seem the strongest, but who will cope best with the conditions?

    I’m going to go Sagan again due to his mad bike handling skillz.

    And will someone please explain ‘Pinchy’ to me?

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Cancellara
    3. Geraint
    4. Van Avermaet
    5. Vanmarcke
  3. VSP PICKS:

    1. greg van avermaet
    2. sep vanmarcke
    3. zdenek stybar
    4. peter sagan
    5. fabian cancellara
  4. @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

  5. @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

     

  6. I can’t believe how wrong you are all getting it. Obviously the whole Etixx squad has been read the riot act and will finally get something right after all the big names are caught the wrong side of a split caused by @the Engine dropping his Malteni on the Kwaremont. Duh.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Terpstra
    2. Thomas
    3. Boonen
    4. Kristoff
    5. Roelandts
  7. @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

    Photos on the inter webs it’ll never be forgotten and yes, P-R is all but a certainty (if that is remotely possible)… provided some good fortune. You know, something tells me that he has had the even better fortune of finding himself a better half. Something to be said for that and success that comes from it.

  8. @wilburrox

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

    Photos on the inter webs it’ll never be forgotten and yes, P-R is all but a certainty (if that is remotely possible)… provided some good fortune. You know, something tells me that he has had the even better fortune of finding himself a better half. Something to be said for that and success that comes from it.

    I see your point – the stabilising effect of a good woman.

    I get the impression that everything up to now has been a warm up – soon the leg warmers will come off and Sparty et al. will be in serious trouble. Sagan is a machine, no doubt.

  9. @the Engine

    All being well I’ll be at the roadside on Sunday drinking my own volume in Belgian ale and eating my own mass in frites so there is that prospect to dull the pain of disappointment.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Spartacus
    2. Sagan
    3. van Avermaet
    4. Kristoff
    5. Sep Vanmarcke

    Ah FUCK, Mate!!!  That is AWESOME!!!  I should be right there with you next year!  Don’t they run a cyclosportif on Saturday over the same route?  Might have to do it next year!

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Sparty
    3. Stybar
    4. Van Avermaet
    5. Tommeke
  10. @dinosaurJR

    Sagan would be unbeatable if he rode for, say, Molteni. Would Merckx have won as many if he rode for Tink-off?

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara
    2. Van Avermaet
    3. Sagan
    4. Vanmarcke
    5. Kwiatkowski
  11. @John Irvine

    I agree – if Pinchy rode for one of the better organised outfits he would be killer (well, even more killer than he is today). He is more or less riding unaided and although it worked for him at the Worlds, I think for a rider at this level, racing at the total upper limit of the sport – he really deserves a well oiled apparatus around him.

    He should be cosseted, protected and then unleashed to lay down the V at just the right moment on the poor bastards around him – not left to his own wits (which are – let’s face it – pretty fucking sharp) to fend for himself.

    Merckx was Merckx, though – I think he was strong enough to do well regardless of which team he rode for. I see a fair bit of that in Sagan too, to be honest.

  12. Sticking with my man Peto.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Cancellara
    3. Boonen
    4. Lars Boom
    5. Kwiatkowski
  13. VSP PICKS:

    1. VAN AVERMAET Greg
    2. STANNARD Ian
    3. SAGAN Peter
    4. KRISTOFF Alexander
    5. CANCELLARA Fabian
  14. VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Cancellara
    3. Vanmarcke
    4. Van Avermaet
    5. Kristoff
  15. @dinosaurJR

    @John Irvine

    I agree – if Pinchy rode for one of the better organised outfits he would be killer (well, even more killer than he is today). He is more or less riding unaided and although it worked for him at the Worlds, I think for a rider at this level, racing at the total upper limit of the sport – he really deserves a well oiled apparatus around him.

    He should be cosseted, protected and then unleashed to lay down the V at just the right moment on the poor bastards around him – not left to his own wits (which are – let’s face it – pretty fucking sharp) to fend for himself.

    Merckx was Merckx, though – I think he was strong enough to do well regardless of which team he rode for. I see a fair bit of that in Sagan too, to be honest.

    Completely agree!  He needs to move across to Etixx next year.  He would KILL everything even more than he already does!

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Sparty
    3. Stybar
    4. Van Avermaet
    5. Tommeke
  16. Ahhh, here goes nuttin. Heart says Tommeke, head says no. Head and heart says this is where the new TB makes his mark.I just don’t think Tommeke has it on the bergs any more, but for P-R, it’s his race.

     

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Cancellara
    3. Benoot
    4. Boonen
    5. Van Avermaet
  17. @wiscot

    Kenny = king of the cobbles? My arse he is. King of the Belgian shrug? No doubt!

    You know that’s a pisstake right?

    @Gianni

    I could hang out with Kenny all day long. Frank tells me he is fun at the bar. Tour of Morocco indeed.

    Yes, Kenny saved me from a dingbat Triathlete vendor at the London Bike Show. It was glorious.

  18. @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

    “Pinchy” is endearing the same way calling the sharks “a bit bitey” in Hawaii is endearing.

    @Buck Rogers

    Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Seperman
    2. Faboo
    3. Sagan
    4. Tomeke
    5. Sunglasses
  19. @frank

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

    “Pinchy” is endearing the same way calling the sharks “a bit bitey” in Hawaii is endearing.

    There are areas of London I’ve heard friends describing as ‘a bit stabby’. Quaint, I thought.

     

  20. What do I know – hoping to keep my 1 point average I guess

    VSP PICKS:

    1. cancellara
    2. van avermaet
    3. Thomas
    4. Stybar
    5. Sagan
  21. @frank

    @wiscot

    Kenny = king of the cobbles? My arse he is. King of the Belgian shrug? No doubt!

    You know that’s a pisstake right?

    @Gianni

    I could hang out with Kenny all day long. Frank tells me he is fun at the bar. Tour of Morocco indeed.

    Yes, Kenny saved me from a dingbat Triathlete vendor at the London Bike Show. It was glorious.

    It was a work of genius. He was eXplaining thE mechanicals to him also.

  22. @frank

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    @dinosaurJR

    @RobSandy

    All to do with the now infamous podium girl bottom pinching incident of 2013.

    Ah, I get it now. I hadn’t made the connection.

    It’d be nice if he can make people forget that by smashing the Ronde and/or Roubaix!

    I think Pinchy has a rather endearing quality to it? I think he is a sure thing for P-R too.

    “Pinchy” is endearing the same way calling the sharks “a bit bitey” in Hawaii is endearing.

    @Buck Rogers

    Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Seperman
    2. Faboo
    3. Sagan
    4. Tomeke
    5. Sunglasses

    Which is why I’m doing it with the Pave boys also

  23. @frank

    @Buck Rogers

    Call up the Pavé boys instead. The sportives are 75k people trying to walk up the bergs.

     

    Good to know.  Do the Pave’ boys do the whole route, every k?  I rode the FULL 250+ km cyclo for Paris Roubaix and it was not too crowded and AMAZING!  But with RVV having the hills, I can see how it would get backed up.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Sagan
    2. Sparty
    3. Stybar
    4. Van Avermaet
    5. Tommeke
  24. I made the mistake of saying, “oh, Peter will get second” last time. Oh, me of little faith!

    The formula for these picks involved a perl script for averaging odds from bookmaking sites, a scan of the picks from you good people, and my own inspiration and studied insights into the greatest sport that humanity has ever sported. Let’s see how we do.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Peter Sagan
    2. Fabian Cancellara
    3. Alexander Kristoff
    4. Michal Kwiatkowski
    5. Greg Van Avermaet
  25. VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara, Fabian
    2. Sagan, Peter
    3. Vanmarcke, Sep
    4. Terpstra, Niki
    5. Benoot, Tiesj
  26. VSP PICKS:

    1. Fabian Cancellara
    2. Greg Van Avermaet
    3. Peter Sagan
    4. Tiesj Benoot
    5. Tom Boonen
  27. VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara, Fabian
    2. Sagan, Peter
    3. Vanmarcke, Sep
    4. Terpstra, Niki
    5. Kwiatkowski, Michael
  28. VSP PICKS:

    1. Sep Vanmarcke
    2. Lars Boom
    3. Michael Kwiatkowski
    4. Peter Sagan
    5. Fabian Cancellara
  29. Off to a rough start so far.

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Peter Sagan
    2. Fabian Cancellara
    3. Greg Van Avermaet
    4. Alexander Kristoff
    5. Sep Vanmarcke
  30. Thanks I am now addicted to the King of Cobbles, it is awesome

    VSP PICKS:

    1. Cancellara
    2. Van Avermaett
    3. Stuyven
    4. Stybar
    5. Thomas

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