What can I say, I’m lazy. I did Rule #33 two months ago, blimey it grows fast! Ask my VMH, she thinks my closest relatives live in the zoo.

Steed is nice. Still, I’m too fat for climbing.. (don’t really wanna show pics because of the many rule violations, it LOOKs like shit with the frame pump, but I just hate having that think in my jersey, but here you go..)

ultimate bidon if you wanna LOOK Pro!

Dude, Rule #33 if you wanna LOOK Pro!

Nice steed from what can see from your pic!

I’m assuming he’s gone off the back as it would seem a little early to celebrate with 67km to go with a lead of only 7:40.

@Beers today in fact, this puppy is locked & loaded in the present queue: http://www.earlyrider.net.au/shop/products/juno-red

That’s awesome!

@Haldy

@wiscot

@Haldy

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

In which case he still could be using the standard calipers, since they still made them? I still think it is some sort of back up bike since it doesn’t have a race number on it and he had some sort of mechanical prior to this point of the race.

If it was weight, they’d have ridden Chorus Monoplanars like PDM did – and his training bikes would all have been road bikes; the CX rig would have different geometry, most notably the higher BB. Not to mention that the canti braking power would have been much, much, much reduced over calipers, another thing you’d not want during a mountain descent.

Picture has been reviewed elsewhere on the interweb – best I can deduce he thought 1991 era cantis had better stopping power. But then elsewhere on the web it goes on about faked moon landings and black helicopters so I don’t really know.

@Mike_P

@frank

But nothing wrong with this one, either:

Flip forward 80 years from when this shot was taken and it could be you and Gianni sat outside the Rapha Club.

This is gonna rule. Can’t wait to see my boy Gianni. And @spankles. And my nephew who I have seen in ages who will be making the trip up to NYC from DC.

Hope it goes really well. Have a ball and several beers.

@frank

@Brianold55

@andrew Hi mate. Nothing wrong with thinking. Relatively flabby because its almost winter here my friend. I think Lightening the Fuck Up was what I was advocating.

Love the old pic above

Surely if its almost winter, shouldn’t your guns be magnificent, honed and tan from a summer of crushing fools? And if you’re coming out the other end of winter, wouldn’t your guns would still be honed because you’d be out killing it in Rule #9 conditions or slaving away on the turbo?

Sorry, can’t understand why guns should ever be flabby. But to your point, no need to read the hundred or so posts about drinking from a bidon. In fact, no need to even read the article. Especially if this shit doesn’t appeal to you.

Hell, we all know that we are only here for the photos. It’s like BigRingRiding around here with a bunch if usless text thrown in between the pics!

So what you’re saying is Velominati is the exact opposite of Playboy?

Excuse me, but just what the fuck is all this Bidon pop swankery without mention of the fact that this gentleman is wearing Beats by Dr Dre. It has not gone unnoticed that they are becoming a common sight in situations such as this. I do believe that there is even colour matching going on.

Now if that isn’t over matching then there is fuck else that is.

However that is not the worst of it. Just what exactly has a Hip-Producer cashing in on his somewhat dubious past a part Gangster come Blunt Smoking Home Boy associated with Niggers With Attitude got to do with the beautiful history of the sport of cycling?

It has nothing to do with sound quality, any audiophile will tell you that those cans cost a lot of money and sound like you are listening to your tunes through a deep layer of mud.

This must have been brought to your attention before, yet I see no mention of it. Sometimes it takes fresh eyes. So you are welcome. However please refrain from causing me further distress by posting pictures of cyclists come “Homeslices” no matter the point that you are trying to illustrate. Thank You.

Nice rant. I particularly liked the “Bidon pop swankery” part–gave me a good chuckle.

@frank

This is my approach…

Fab Sinatra wearing helmet askew again.

His helmet is not “askew.” Fabs is wearing it at a rakish angle.

@frank

@Haldy

@wiscot

@Haldy

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

 

 

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

In which case he still could be using the standard calipers, since they still made them? I still think it is some sort of back up bike since it doesn’t have a race number on it and he had some sort of mechanical prior to this point of the race.

If it was weight, they’d have ridden Chorus Monoplanars like PDM did – and his training bikes would all have been road bikes; the CX rig would have different geometry, most notably the higher BB. Not to mention that the canti braking power would have been much, much, much reduced over calipers, another thing you’d not want during a mountain descent.

Reduced braking power….isn’t that what you want on a descent? After all brakes only slow you down. I seem to remember Fignon having lost it on a descent in the ’87 tour and I am pretty sure he had calipers on that day. :-)

All kidding aside, that set up is probably more powerful than standard calipers. Having worked on more than a few set-ups like that myself over the years. If set up correctly (and I am assuming the team mechanic knew what he was doing..) those levers have a greater mechanical advantage than the mountain bike levers those cantis would have been normally paired with.

I love those old school Coke bidons! In fact, I bought this one: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B007HZYB1K/ref=oh_details_o04_s00_i00?ie=UTF8&psc=1 on Amazon. I know it’s not exactly like the one The Prof is sporting, but…And yes, I took off the top clear plastic thing.

Now if that isn’t over matching then there is fuck else that is.

However that is not the worst of it. Just what exactly has a Hip-Producer cashing in on his somewhat dubious past a part Gangster come Blunt Smoking Home Boy associated with Niggers With Attitude got to do with the beautiful history of the sport of cycling?

It has nothing to do with sound quality, any audiophile will tell you that those cans cost a lot of money and sound like you are listening to your tunes through a deep layer of mud.

This must have been brought to your attention before, yet I see no mention of it. Sometimes it takes fresh eyes. So you are welcome. However please refrain from causing me further distress by posting pictures of cyclists come “Homeslices” no matter the point that you are trying to illustrate. Thank You.

@Brianold55

@andrew Hi mate. Nothing wrong with thinking. Relatively flabby because its almost winter here my friend. I think Lightening the Fuck Up was what I was advocating.

Love the old pic above

Surely if its almost winter, shouldn’t your guns be magnificent, honed and tan from a summer of crushing fools? And if you’re coming out the other end of winter, wouldn’t your guns would still be honed because you’d be out killing it in Rule #9 conditions or slaving away on the turbo?

Sorry, can’t understand why guns should ever be flabby. But to your point, no need to read the hundred or so posts about drinking from a bidon. In fact, no need to even read the article. Especially if this shit doesn’t appeal to you.

Hell, we all know that we are only here for the photos.  It’s like BigRingRiding around here with a bunch if usless text thrown in between the pics!

@andrew Hi mate. Nothing wrong with thinking. Relatively flabby because its almost winter here my friend. I think Lightening the Fuck Up was what I was advocating.

Love the old pic above

Surely if its almost winter, shouldn’t your guns be magnificent, honed and tan from a summer of crushing fools? And if you’re coming out the other end of winter, wouldn’t your guns would still be honed because you’d be out killing it in Rule #9 conditions or slaving away on the turbo?

Sorry, can’t understand why guns should ever be flabby. But to your point, no need to read the hundred or so posts about drinking from a bidon. In fact, no need to even read the article. Especially if this shit doesn’t appeal to you.

@frank

But nothing wrong with this one, either:

Flip forward 80 years from when this shot was taken and it could be you and Gianni sat outside the Rapha Club.

This is gonna rule. Can’t wait to see my boy Gianni. And @spankles. And my nephew who I have seen in ages who will be making the trip up to NYC from DC.

What is the punishment for drinking from a Camelback whilst riding? Does it hurt? A lot?

If you’re on a road bike, the punishment is endless piss taking and stripping of at least two levels of Velominatus status.

@frank

But nothing wrong with this one, either:

Flip forward 80 years from when this shot was taken and it could be you and Gianni sat outside the Rapha Club.

Shit, is that an old photo?  I thought it was Frank and Gianni on the original Keepers’ Tour.

Love the old pic above

But nothing wrong with this one, either:

Grasp bidon, bend elbow to bring bidon to mouth;

Drink.

Repeat in reverse.

Minimal movement. No bidon movement or re-grasping. No chance of dropping.

Just a thought.

@frank

@piwakawaka

@Teocalli.

On rides long enough to justify two bidons pure water on the down tube and energy drink on the seat tube. For some reason I flip it by chucking in the air (only a little way) and catching it again – always done it that way and never dropped one yet – that’s put the mockers on that!

I drink right handed from the down tube and store on the seat tube, I grab the top of the bidon and also throw it up, just enough to catch it around the waist and drink into the side of my mouth.

I almost never drink whilst on the rivet, probably not on it for long enough… There will always be a moment of peace, quick, drink.

This throwing the bidon in the air bizniz has my mind blown. I’m going to need a video in order to comprehend and then pass judgement.

Checked my form today, would be hard to film, it’s all done in the same movement, and I definitely don’t flip it, as you pull the bidon up you just let it go momentum moves it up and I just grab it again further down allowing you to squeeze around the waist, no suck required. It’s probably in the air for .25 of a second, so would need Go-Pro on Slow-Mo to show you, unless you can get a book release tour down under past the accountants!

Yeah, thinking about it that’s pretty much what I do.

@therealpeel

@Barracuda

@sthilzy

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

Beat me to it…. I had that photo locked and loaded ready to post. Nothing says ” get the fuck outa my way ” quite like that photo !

It seems full still…Maybe he hasn’t mastered replacing the bidon in its proper place and is throwing it in frustration at his inability…or maybe he just doesn’t care that it’s nearly full because he has 8 riders, at least one team car, and legions of gsns eager to replace that bottle. Must be nice to be Boonen.

Considering the context of that pic (it was taken when Boonen soloed off the front of the peloton on the way to winning his 4th Paris-Roubaix) I think it’s more “Drinking done. Now I ride“.

Hence my comment above,    and   ” This drinking business is too time consuming, its wasting my time ! “

@Barracuda

@sthilzy

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

Beat me to it…. I had that photo locked and loaded ready to post. Nothing says ” get the fuck outa my way ” quite like that photo !

It seems full still…Maybe he hasn’t mastered replacing the bidon in its proper place and is throwing it in frustration at his inability…or maybe he just doesn’t care that it’s nearly full because he has 8 riders, at least one team car, and legions of gsns eager to replace that bottle. Must be nice to be Boonen.

Considering the context of that pic (it was taken when Boonen soloed off the front of the peloton on the way to winning his 4th Paris-Roubaix) I think it’s more “Drinking done. Now I ride“.

What is the punishment for drinking from a Camelback whilst riding? Does it hurt? A lot?

They say the drinking tube only stings for a little bit, thankfully, you being on this site, means hopefully you wont have to find out, hold the line and all will be fine !

@piwakawaka

@Teocalli.

On rides long enough to justify two bidons pure water on the down tube and energy drink on the seat tube. For some reason I flip it by chucking in the air (only a little way) and catching it again – always done it that way and never dropped one yet – that’s put the mockers on that!

I drink right handed from the down tube and store on the seat tube, I grab the top of the bidon and also throw it up, just enough to catch it around the waist and drink into the side of my mouth.

I almost never drink whilst on the rivet, probably not on it for long enough… There will always be a moment of peace, quick, drink.

This throwing the bidon in the air bizniz has my mind blown. I’m going to need a video in order to comprehend and then pass judgement.

Checked my form today, would be hard to film, it’s all done in the same movement, and I definitely don’t flip it, as you pull the bidon up you just let it go momentum moves it up and I just grab it again further down allowing you to squeeze around the waist, no suck required. It’s probably in the air for .25 of a second, so would need Go-Pro on Slow-Mo to show you, unless you can get a book release tour down under past the accountants!

@Beers today in fact, this puppy is locked & loaded in the present queue: http://www.earlyrider.net.au/shop/products/juno-red

Ahhh, the good ol’  Spherovelo.   Looks aero, ITT’s round the lounge room ?

@sthilzy

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

Beat me to it…. I had that photo locked and loaded ready to post. Nothing says ” get the fuck outa my way ” quite like that photo !

It seems full still…Maybe he hasn’t mastered replacing the bidon in its proper place and is throwing it in frustration at his inability…or maybe he just doesn’t care that it’s nearly full because he has 8 riders, at least one team car, and legions of gsns eager to replace that bottle.  Must be nice to be Boonen.

I’m with @ChrisO on the bidon transfer system. No one way to skin the ‘nana though.

My mechanic is on the smoothly pull form cage, flick up and over in the air, catch and underhand sip, then smoothly transfer back to the cage method. It looks fooking boss, but he is a pain engine on the bike, so you’d expect it from him…

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

Beat me to it…. I had that photo locked and loaded ready to post.    Nothing says ” get the fuck outa my way ” quite like that photo !

I hope they expand it to more cycling terms – and I note that they’re looking for native speakers to help – they definitely need an Aussie to correct the Heinrich Haussler entry – I’m pretty sure it’s pronounced “Hen-ry House-la-mayt”.

But this one take the crown for most Casually Deliberate drinking technique.

Love it!

@Mikael Liddy That baby’s tan lines are not Rule #7 compliant. One demerit.

Yes, that Pedalwan has much to learn yet, but at least s/he has started down the path.

Was looking for a pic of Cancellara throwing his bidon away to match the Boonen one.

Instead I found this:

Unrelated, but Frank Schleck. Maybe reaching for a new bidon?

I have trouble imagining Hinault doing that.

Actually that’s also Faboo, but on the final stage of the 2008 Tour.  (The only time CSC has the chance to ride with yellow bar wrap.)

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

This.  Always.  I’ve also heard that keeping the hand underneath keeps your elbow in, reducing frontal area (and hence drag), as well as making it less likely someone or something will catch your arm flapping around like a bird and cause a crash.

And Fignon was a monster.

This is my approach…

Fab Sinatra wearing helmet askew again.

Instead I found this:

Unrelated, but Frank Schleck. Maybe reaching for a new bidon?

I have trouble imagining Hinault doing that.

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

The next step is to master drilling the moto with a bidon Chipo-style – see the video in the comments of this fantastic post from a few years ago: http://www.velominati.com/tradition/youtube-mario-cipollini/

But nothing wrong with this one, either:

But this one take the crown for most Casually Deliberate drinking technique.

@Haldy

@wiscot

@Haldy

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

In which case he still could be using the standard calipers, since they still made them? I still think it is some sort of back up bike since it doesn’t have a race number on it and he had some sort of mechanical prior to this point of the race.

If it was weight, they’d have ridden Chorus Monoplanars like PDM did – and his training bikes would all have been road bikes; the CX rig would have different geometry, most notably the higher BB. Not to mention that the canti braking power would have been much, much, much reduced over calipers, another thing you’d not want during a mountain descent.

Reduced braking power….isn’t that what you want on a descent? After all brakes only slow you down. I seem to remember Fignon having lost it on a descent in the ’87 tour and I am pretty sure he had calipers on that day.   :-)

All kidding aside, that set up is probably more powerful than standard calipers. Having worked on more than a few set-ups like that myself over the years. If set up correctly (and I am assuming the team mechanic knew what he was doing..) those levers have a greater mechanical advantage than the mountain bike levers those cantis would have been normally paired with.

@wiscot

@Haldy

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

In which case he still could be using the standard calipers, since they still made them? I still think it is some sort of back up bike since it doesn’t have a race number on it and he had some sort of mechanical prior to this point of the race.

If it was weight, they’d have ridden Chorus Monoplanars like PDM did – and his training bikes would all have been road bikes; the CX rig would have different geometry, most notably the higher BB. Not to mention that the canti braking power would have been much, much, much reduced over calipers, another thing you’d not want during a mountain descent.

@Haldy

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

In which case he still could be using the standard calipers, since they still made them? I still think it is some sort of back up bike since it doesn’t have a race number on it and he had some sort of mechanical prior to this point of the race.

@frank

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

Because they were lighter and better than the Campagnolo Deltas the other riders are using?

@Ccos

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

Ran out of spare bikes, and broke out a training bike? There is no race number on the bike he’s riding….

@Gianni

@Buck Rogers

Any chance of Buck showing up in Manny Hattie on Saturday?

Holy fuck, it’s only two days away! I completely lost track of time on this one, with V Vth coming. I could bus or train right on up to that crummy little island for the event…

No more talk. Make it happen.

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

Yes, he was. As @Gianni says, if Figgles did it, then it was mucho Pro.

Love this shot too, although I can’t understand why he’d be on Canti’s on a mountain stage.

@Haldy, @KW –

I had concerns about the picture overall, but then I realized they would spark conversation.Agreed on the Rule #37 violation, but had to be done to show side-mouth drink.

And I just spent at least 5 minutes looking at baby goat images. Poor form: not a side-mouth drinker among them, all straight on.

Fair play. The original still looks goofy if you ask me. If we were riding together, I might have to give you some shit for that. Granted, you’d probably crush me on the next hill, but still.

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

Such a badass photo and I am moving your bidon into the right cage for Saturday’s Rapha ride in NYC.

@Buck Rogers

Any chance of Buck showing up in Manny Hattie on Saturday?

Holy fuck, it’s only two days away! I completely lost track of time on this one, with V Vth coming. I could bus or train right on up to that crummy little island for the event…

@minion

I can’t wait for Mini Phinney to start winning something other than fashion-mag-esque posing contests for the cameras, cos when the other foot falls and he learns how to win, it’s gonna be on.

(Deluding myself this much is quite unprecedented)

He’s a ponce for sure, but I love it. His dad did a lot of legg talking, but he certainly also had a flair for style.

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Phinney the Elder had “waiting for the start” down to a science too.

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

I would love be present during the discussion between the two of you over bidon cage placement. I’m sure this is a never-ending argument with no true winner, since you both have your minds made up.

@Ron

Can “soft skills” cancel out HardMan status?

Or, if executed properly, do they act to enhance each other?

No, soft skills are acquired through our journey towards becoming hardmen and hardwomen. By the time such status is achieved, the rider in question has immaculately cared-for machines, perfect technique, perfect kit, and executes all of it with an air of being Casually Deliberate.

Got it! Thank you.

Any chance of Buck showing up in Manny Hattie on Saturday?

Racing Masters sometimes you get newb’s in the bunch (when races are not split according to Cat, just age) that can’t seem to manage pulling out a bidon, taking a swig, and putting it back without looking down. Gets all squirrely. Proper removal and return of the bidon should be practiced over n over till it’s just second nature. It looks Pro, and it keeps everyone around you safe.

That, or you get your buddies to stand at points along the route and just throw it at your face.

 

yep, thats me, in reality, thankful if I can drink and breath without choking due to the pace

in the ethereal realm of my mind, I would much rather take the Bidon…top first, sit up from my pull of the entire pack as we are souplesse-lee cruising at 50kph….flip the fucker over in mid air, catch it and take but a sip, and throw it back down again til next need….

but no, I’m more the sucker off the back, just glad to get a sip and breath….

I can’t wait for Mini Phinney to start winning something other than fashion-mag-esque posing contests for the cameras, cos when the other foot falls and he learns how to win, it’s gonna be on.

(Deluding myself this much is quite unprecedented)

He’s a ponce for sure, but I love it. His dad did a lot of legg talking, but he certainly also had a flair for style.

[dmalbum: path=”/velominati.com/wp-content/uploads/readers/frank/2014.05.01.09.59.58/1//”/]

@Ron

Can “soft skills” cancel out HardMan status?

Or, if executed properly, do they act to enhance each other?

No, soft skills are acquired through our journey towards becoming hardmen and hardwomen. By the time such status is achieved, the rider in question has immaculately cared-for machines, perfect technique, perfect kit, and executes all of it with an air of being Casually Deliberate.

Soft skills can be faked too. How I long for the days of friction shifting, when by the silence of the shift, you could asses the skill of the cyclist.

Technology can’t help you fake the “float” over pave though. No matter what the big S says.

@Teocalli.

On rides long enough to justify two bidons pure water on the down tube and energy drink on the seat tube. For some reason I flip it by chucking in the air (only a little way) and catching it again – always done it that way and never dropped one yet – that’s put the mockers on that!

I drink right handed from the down tube and store on the seat tube, I grab the top of the bidon and also throw it up, just enough to catch it around the waist and drink into the side of my mouth.

I almost never drink whilst on the rivet, probably not on it for long enough… There will always be a moment of peace, quick, drink.

This throwing the bidon in the air bizniz has my mind blown. I’m going to need a video in order to comprehend and then pass judgement.

@Geraint

Wow, I’m really not feeling the silver & green Empires & black stockings, especially not with BMC team kit. I originally thought there was a typo in the caption, but on second thoughts it may have been judicious:

I’ll fix the spelling when he starts winning. Until then, I’ll just be proud that you got the joke.

@ChrisO

@JCM

@Hammer

I’m in the bidon swap caste as well.

@sthilzy

To finish drinking properly looking pro, don’t forget to jettison the bidon properly;

one must also learn to drink in a manner that allows for breathing while avoiding the aspiration of fluid

This is one thing yet to master.

I wish I had a cleaning crew following me like I do on Haleakala; nothing better than blowing by your DS, VMH, and DS’s VMH cheering at the roadside, chucking the bidon as you crawl by at an imperceptible rate of speed and wait for the car to come back up so you can sticky-bottle the next one onto the rig.

Grab it from the top, flip it, drink it from the side of mouth. I’ve always done this, and have been poked fun at for it since I can remember. Now I know it was just to allow me to keep my eyes in front, and continue to dish The V (safely).

The guy below is the best picture I could find depicting my style.

Is that a Sriracha bottle?

@bici

but what about his knee-length socks – in black! – and the open zip of his skin suite? Is this according to the rules?

No, its not, although he’s obviously taking the piss out of himself with everything he’s go going on. Some degree of leeway is also given on account of it being a warmup; once he’s on the road he generally Looks Fantastic as All Times.

Can “soft skills” cancel out HardMan status?

Or, if executed properly, do they act to enhance each other?

No, soft skills are acquired through our journey towards becoming hardmen and hardwomen. By the time such status is achieved, the rider in question has immaculately cared-for machines, perfect technique, perfect kit, and executes all of it with an air of being Casually Deliberate.

@Haldy, @KW –

I had concerns about the picture overall, but then I realized they would spark conversation.Agreed on the Rule #37 violation, but had to be done to show side-mouth drink.

And I just spent at least 5 minutes looking at baby goat images. Poor form: not a side-mouth drinker among them, all straight on.

Can’t imagine that searching “Goat sucking nipple” at work yielded any interesting IT violations at all, eh?

That, or you get your buddies to stand at points along the route and just throw it at your face.

I had concerns about the picture overall, but then I realized they would spark conversation.Agreed on the Rule #37 violation, but had to be done to show side-mouth drink.

And I just spent at least 5 minutes looking at baby goat images.  Poor form: not a side-mouth drinker among them, all straight on.

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

I’m not sure if anyone is in front of him in this picture, but if there is, the look on his face tells me he is going to chase them down, rip their legs off, and eat them while descending…

Unlike the photo of Phinney, there are too many things wrong….  moon walkers, the clashing of different decades while wearing knee highs….  blah,

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

The aero guys say it’s better in the seat post cage, in opposition to the style guys. Some would argue then, it depends upon who you’re with (who’s gonna do the yelling).  For the single cage set up, I opt for style. For the double, I drink as you describe. Can’t usually be troubled to switch them out and being able to drink from either one hones your soft skills.

Le Professor was the man. Fantastic photo.

I remember watching Laurent Fignon (in his Chateau d’Ax-Gatorade kit) soloing away in a Tour stage, in the mountains. Everytime he went for the bidon he held it the same way; hand underneath, palm up, pinky finger closest to face. It looked so pro I assumed that was how it should be done and how I’ve always done it since. And even though it drives Frank nuts, if I have one bottle on my bike, I have in the seat-post cage.

 

WHAT A PHOTO!!!  Fuckin perfect!  Man, I will always be reliving the glory days of my junior high/high school years of racing in the late ’80’s to early ’90’s.  I have not seen this photo before.  Beautiful.  Man, I still respect the hell out of Le Professeur.  Pure class, all the time.

but what about his knee-length socks – in black! – and the open zip of his skin suite? Is this according to the rules?

Great point!  Jeeeezhus, look at those (compression???) socks.  Man, I cannot get behind Mini-Phinney.  I just cannot stand the guy.  Not even sure why?  Must be all the “fashion” photos of him that come out where he looks like a Justin Bieber wannabe.

Grab it from the top, flip it, drink it from the side of mouth. I’ve always done this, and have been poked fun at for it since I can remember. Now I know it was just to allow me to keep my eyes in front, and continue to dish The V (safely).

The guy below is the best picture I could find depicting my style.

That pic looks like a baby goat that’s being bottle fed.

Ride Like DAD!!!

On rides long enough to justify two bidons pure water on the down tube and energy drink on the seat tube. For some reason I flip it by chucking in the air (only a little way) and catching it again – always done it that way and never dropped one yet – that’s put the mockers on that!

I drink right handed from the down tube and store on the seat tube, I grab the top of the bidon and also throw it up, just enough to catch it around the waist and drink into the side of my mouth.

I almost never drink whilst on the rivet, probably not on it for long enough… There will always be a moment of peace, quick, drink.

@Haldy Must be a foo-foo drink in that bottle since the pinky is extended.

It must be cold Tea drunk correctly with little pinky extended.

On rides long enough to justify two bidons pure water on the down tube and energy drink on the seat tube.  For some reason I flip it by chucking in the air (only a little way) and catching it again – always done it that way and never dropped one yet – that’s put the mockers on that!

I can’t wait for Mini Phinney to start winning something other than fashion-mag-esque posing contests for the cameras, cos when the other foot falls and he learns how to win, it’s gonna be on.

(Deluding myself this much is quite unprecedented)

Bingo.

(Deluding myself this much is quite unprecedented)