Categories: Racing

Grillin’ Up a T-Bone on the Fourth of July

W is for Wouter. Photo: Fotoreporter Sirotti

In the US on the Fourth of July, we drink shit beer and grill loads of meat to celebrate our declaration of Independence from England. I think that’s supposed to be ironic, us being lazy and getting fat on this day, because my understanding of the Delcaration of Independence is that it said something to the effect of, “You guys are lazy and fat and suck. And we hate tea and taxes. That’s two more reasons than we need to be rid of you.” Personally, I like both the English and tea, but nobody asked me so here we are.

I’ve never made it a secret that I’m not a fan of Vaughters’ “sit in” tactics and, by association have soured on Gramin-Cervelo in general this year. But I have to admit, I’m coming back around to the boys after their stellar efforts in the opening stages of the Tour. In contrast to their Rule #67-violating standard-operating procedure, today they wrested control of the bunch away from a dominating HTC-Highroad train, chucked a Maillot-Juane into a leadout so strong it looked more like a breakaway than a bunch sprint, and delivered T-Bone to the line first on the Fourth of July.

I haven’t done the research to back this up, partly because I’m certain someone will correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe this represents the first American Tour stage win on this particular date. To top it off, we had an emotional win dedicated to Farrar’s fallen friend, Wouter Weylandt.

America, fuck yeah.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

michael says:

Jul 4 2011 at 5:01 pm

It's precisely this attitude that starts wars.
marko says:

Jul 4 2011 at 5:19 pm

Spicoli said it best.
RedRanger says:

Jul 4 2011 at 5:54 pm

Chapeau to Tyler. Now let's get drunk and eat BBQ meat!
RedRanger says:

Jul 4 2011 at 6:03 pm

Ps. I never drink shit beer.
eightzero says:

Jul 4 2011 at 6:32 pm

@ marko

I can just see Vaughters talking to Stapleton afterwards: "Dude. If I'm here, and you're here, doesn't that make it our race?"
frank says:

Jul 4 2011 at 6:42 pm

@michael

It's precisely this attitude that starts wars.

Its especially lethal when combined with no sense of humor.
Mikeweb says:

Jul 4 2011 at 7:18 pm

I believe I heard on Eurosport that Farrar is now the 1st American to win a stage in all three GTs.

Sitting here finishing off a Harpoon IPA. Happy 4th, all!
Collin says:

Jul 4 2011 at 7:23 pm

@Mikeweb
Not quite. Dave Zabriskie holds that honor. Tyler Hamilton *did* hold the honor until that whole blood doping hammer smashed his results.
Sprider says:

Jul 4 2011 at 7:38 pm

@ frank, A-Merckx! Team G-C is showing that they're the real deal. Can't wait for Zabriske to podium!
Collin says:

Jul 4 2011 at 7:52 pm

@Sprider
With you 100% Sprider. DZ has had good results all year, so hopefully he can jump onto the podium.