Guest Article: La Vie Velominatus-Transformation

photo: jchristophe

The fear of crashing is there but we can’t let override our pleasure in cycling. @mblume writes of this and underplays his riding the Haute Route. That ride alone should be a long article about abiding Rule V.

Yours in Cycling, Gianni

As a transplanted American living in Europe for 12 years, I have had the great fortune of upgrading my cycling routes from the flattish, potholed, roadkill -filled, tire- puncturing, debris -strewn, pick-up truck infested cycling routes of St. Louis, Missouri to the secure, scenic, smooth as glass roads sitting at the base of the Swiss Alps, as a resident of Zurich, Switzerland.

In my first nine years in the land of Cancellara, I was much more drawn to mountain biking and racing, which probably spoke as much to my post-St. Louis, traumatic road riding recovery period as to the quality of the local singletrack. As a caterpillar undergoes a pupal metamorphosis into a butterfly, I began the transition to a road cyclist. At first the signs of the transformation were slight as I rode my Cippolini/ Gotti era Saeco-Cannondale team replica aluminum frame with Spinergies no more than once a week. Then I began to feel embarrassed about  wearing a mountain bike-specific kit while on the road bike, on full display to the perfectly attired, affluent, Swiss chapter of the Velominati. I really began to feel the transformation was inevitable when I began to pay strict attention to my diet and weight. One more agent of change during my  transformation to a road cyclist must also be given its proper, but tainted due: the rise of the Pharmstrong dynasty and the increased media attention paid to my countryman and cycling.

Eventually, I upgraded my ride to one signed by Ernesto Colnago. I started riding in road specific gear. I developed PR goals on all the local small Alps and generally began to live the life of an apprentice Velominati. One key item that hindered my transformation to a true amateur Velominati: the fear of crashing. As a youth, I had several bike crashes on the pavement which resulted in losing several teeth and raising my parents’ insurance premiums. In my entire career of road racing in St. Louis (2 races), I had narrowly avoided crashes that sent friends to hospitals and ruined their bikes. So despite my apparent transformation to a road cyclist, I mainly trained in isolation. For the most part I abstained from road bike races except for the occasional Alpine cyclosportive. This strategy allowed me to not be exposed to the quick, jerky reactions and the cacophony of the peloton and the resultant tense shooting fear of crashing that careened around my head like a never ending game of pinball.

Ultimately, a conversation with my Dad changed this. He had just retired and at a toast following an excellent celebratory meal, reflected on his life to that point, “Do not get to my age, look back,and have regrets about not pursuing your passions.” From that moment on I began to pursue more fully my passion of road cycling and racing. Luckily to date,  I have been crash free. Although I have witnessed some nasty crashes very near to me in road races that still give me nightmares. I still think the sound of carbon and flesh hitting the pavement is one of the sickest sounds on the planet.

During 2011, I trained more seriously than ever: alpine training camps in Arizona and France, reading and studying the Rules as well as discussing them with mates, with all the seriousness of the debt ceiling debates in the US Congress. All of this devotion was in preparation for the chance to try to have a stage race experience like the Pros.

The race objective was the Haute Route, which covers a seven-stage, 720 kilometer course from Geneva to Nice. The race featured 15 Alpine cols with four mountain-top stage finishes, as well as a 12km mountain time trial on the fearsome Col du Granon. I expected many moments of pain and elation as I tried to drag my 40 year old body over the 17,000 meters of total ascent.

On stage 2, in a packed and nervous peloton at the start of the stage before the Col des Saisies, a bottle was dropped in the group ahead of me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the bottle coming my direction through the air, like a punted football at a fairly high speed. The bottle ended up under my front wheel at an angle that caused me to go skidding along the pavement. I had finally realized the  nightmare crash scenario complete with the nasty sounds and pain resulting in road rash. Bruising and blood were resplendent on my entire left side and much more importantly, my pristine Scott Addict steed showed certain minor scars from the battle with the French road.

I am pleased to report that years of training topped off by this past year of paying reverence to Rule V overrode any worries about pain. My main goal was to get back in the race as soon as possible after a mandatory trip to the race ambulance. I finished the stage and the rest of the week’s racing. I have a new respect for the Pros and the level of mental focus required to compete and win Grand Tours and the demands of consecutive days of racing. Crashing is just one part of a wildly complex set of challenges and threats that the Pros and Velominati  must live with and overcome.

For all you Velominati out there, find your passion and pursue it.

mblume

Original American MTBer converted roadie in last 10 years from living in Switzerland. Vow to uphold the Rules. Love the witty banter in the comments sections.

View Comments

  • Is that bullet holes in the altitude and speed limit signs?? I thought that only happened here in the good ol' USA.

  • @mblume: Nicely done. Having left yards of epidermis and even teeth (not to mention precious red blood cells) and various venues around the PNW, I can attest to the fact that crashing sucks. But not as bad as that first or second shower after.
    Crashes happen even to the most experienced of us, and I've found that the best remedy for that is not to ever think about it.
    Hold your line, don't stare at the wheel in front of you, don't overlap (when possible), and practice bumping with your friends in non-race situations.
    Remember: pain is temporary, and it never hurts to have friends that are ER physicians and Anesthesiologists.

  • @mblume: Stage races are tougher than people realize, the Haute sounds especially excrutiating, even more so with a crash that early in the race. I did the Killington Stage Race last year, which is just a baby comparitively. I felt great for the 1st 2 stages, the 3rd "climbers" stage was a pure sufferfest, tired legs or not. Of course I'll continue to up the ante, as I think you will as well...

  • Excellent write up. I am really very curious about this Haute Route race. Sounds awesome and would love to see a write up about that as well. Thanks for contributing!

  • Nice one @mblume. Slightly (nay, very) jealous of where you've been living these past 12 yrs as well! Having these routes at your backdoor for a training ride? Not fucking jealous at all.
    Your father's sage advice is something I try to pass on to my children as well. If we worried about crashing too much, one would never throw a leg over a bike.

  • Awesomeness, mblume!

    I cannot imagine moving from Missouri to Switzerland. That's great. Love reading about the ascension of others to La Vie Velominatus.

  • mblume, you captured what we all feel whether it is actual or imagined fear it is no fun. In the end you made it and found out that the reality of racing trumps the reality of road rash.

    A season with out road rash is like being a kid in summer in the north east and not getting poison ivy.

  • Great article! Crashing has always been the one thing holding me back, I start going fast and think about how unreliable my equipment is or how rough the street is. But, a week ago today, I was taking a corner at a good pace, and my rain-soaked grip slipped right off the handlebar. I crashed, took a good chunk of skin off my nose and chin and chipped a tooth, but when I got back on my bike I was grinning ear to ear. I guess I realize now that fear of crashing holds you back fast more than crashing ever will.

    Thanks for at fantastic article, I loved reading it!

  • I hope this isn't tempting fate but I usually manage to avoid the carnage, even when it happens ahead of me.

    Most memorably one morning we were barreling along at 50km/h and the guy three inches ahead of me came down on a lump of metal debris. I can still recall every detail - thinking "Oh no, I'm coming down too" then seeing that he had fallen to the left, and his bike to the right and amazingly there was a space between them WHICH I WAS GOING THROUGH ! That was totally luck more than good management.

    On the other hand we tend to have more than our share of crashes in the group and a lot of the time it is simply because people aren't concentrating. They ride along constantly chatting and talking, they aren't aware of whether the person ahead is a very experienced rider or a newb, they aren't looking and listening for brakes, freewheeling and anything that will upset the rhythm.

    Most of my crashes and scars have been on my own and entirely my fault through not paying attention to the road surface (ice, diesel, pothole respectively). And once my chain slipped and locked my back wheel coming down Gladesville Bridge at high speed, for any Sydney-siders.

    Incredibly none of them have required stitches or involved broken bones. Long may it continue.

Share
Published by
mblume

Recent Posts

Anatomy of a Photo: Sock & Shoe Game

I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…

6 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s World Championship Road Race 2017

Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Women’s World Championship Road Race 2017

The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Vuelta a España 2017

Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Clasica Ciclista San Sebastian 2017

This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…

7 years ago

Route Finding

I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…

7 years ago