Velominati Super Prestige: Tour de France

Two douchebags and A. Grimpeur rocket up the Ventoux in 2009

The inaugural Velominati Super Prestige continues the with Tour de France edition, on Saturday July 3rd in Rotterdam, the Netherlands, just kilometers from the start of the Giro d’Italia in Amsterdam (Dutchland is a small country). This will be the second Grand Tour of the series, and at this stage the Grand Tour rules and regulations are fairly well-defined, so take a moment to review them on the VSP Page.

The Tour is, of course, a major event.  My personal preference lies with the Giro, but there is no denying the magnitude of the Tour and the appeal it holds.  For three weeks, the world pays attention to our sport, and – provided the Tour doesn’t coincide with the World Cup football matches – this is the biggest sporting event during this time of the year.  (An interesting observation: the last time these events coincided, the winner was eventually stripped of his title.)

Having run the VSP Giro edition where we tested the ruleset for Grand Tours, we’ve managed to set up a scoring system that seems fair and helps to close down the competition to afford newcomers the ability to catch up with some good picks; the Giro proved that lineup switches and the associated penalties kept the point gains pretty small while allowing strategy to play an interesting role.  There is a full overview of the rules and standing at the VSP Schedule, Rules, & Results page, but here is the ten-second overview:

Every contestant is to choose their top five General Classification picks of the race.  The final podium of le Grande Boucle is worth 15 points to the winner, 10 points for second, 5 points for third, 3 points for fourth, and 2 point for fifth.  Given the effect crashes can have on a tour, we’ve set up some guidelines around making changes to your lineup during the race: you’re allowed to change your lineup if any rider in your pick list drops out for any reason without any penalty; rest days will allow contestants to make changes to their lineup, however those changes will come at a point penalty.  (Visit the VSP Schedule, Rules, & Results page for a complete breakdown of these points.)

Every day, the leader in the points standings will have the honor of wearing the Yellow Jersey when posting on the site; the overall winner will wear the Yellow Jersey for the remainder of the season and will also earn an “Obey the Rules” bumper sticker.  All reader’s points qualify towards the final prize of the free Velominati Shop Apron.  As always, if you are inclined to enter, simply post your predictions for the top five placings.

New to the Tour de France edition is the addition of naming the winner of the Green and Polka-dot jerseys for the Tour.  There will be no points awarded towards these two jerseys, but the leader of the competition of these jerseys will have the honor of commenting with a Green or Polka-dot jersey badge throughout the competition and the winner will earn the right to comment with that badge until next year’s Tour.  The contestant who picks both the final Green and Polka jersey winners correctly will win a Velominati Logo bumper sticker.   Tie-breakers will go to the first contestant who posts their entire lineup (all 5 GC picks plus Green and Polka-dot jersey winners).  Given that this sub-competition has no points, pick substitutions will only be granted under the DNF regulations of the VSP; no rest-day substitutions are allowed.

Sub-competitions will be conducted while the Tour is underway for specific stages.  These stages will be chosen a few days prior to the stage being held and will be selected based on the current race conditions with the aim of choosing the most decisive and exciting stages of the race, so check back often to make sure you don’t miss out.  Sub-competitions will be held in separate editions.

Good luck!

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • The PRESSURE - I feel like a "whimpering house eunuch", racing was easier than this... God I have to get some ingestible Rule #5.

  • P.S. love the image above and the caption - could be a new Velominati game - Douche, Duoche, Grimpe for those with little Velominnie me's.

  • @Rob
    We've talked about this before: there's no way to ingest or inject Rule #5. To quote Yoda: "do or do not; there is no ingestion."

    But Saturday, June 3? That must have been a long sleep I had; who won?

  • @Roberto Marques But you have proven yourself in a grand tour, I am just a one day lucky fool.

    @SteampunkYea quote me Yoda but offer no real substantive help? Can someone send me something in the mail - Frank? (I want to be like the pros) Please??

  • @Rob one day luck fool? and what is this rainbow jersey besides your name? Of course there are some exceptions but I haven`t seen too many fools wearing the rainbow jersey...

  • @Marko
    Menchov is actually racing this one if you want to put him down this time. He's a really good rider when he's not falling off his bike.

    @Rob
    Rule #5 is either in your DNA or it's not. Like grace on Seinfeld. Either you got it or you don't. Rule #5 is about the voices in your head and whether they tell you to quit or to keep going. But look who I'm telling: anyone mashing a Dahon doesn't need to hear this.

  • @Rob
    Me niether. Do you think it's trash-talking or sportsmanlike?

    @Steampunk
    Douche, Steampunk. I'm seriously thinking about tipping Dennis the Menace but with stage three looming do you think he'll be able to keep is top-tube underneath him?

    On a totally unrelated side note (well kind of related if we're talking about not crashing), I met this budding hardman last night on a group ride. The kid was a 13 year old stud. 60k ride with a mid 30's pace this little fella was riding his mom's classic old steel trek with downtube shifters taking his fair share of pulls. Then we get to this intersection strewn with pebbles. Not sand or a little gravel but this big patch of fucking pebbles. I pussed out, hit the brakes, and swept wide to the outside for fear of crashing or taking peeps out on the inside or both. The little hardman holds his line, rides the pebbles, his back wheel skids, he get his bike underneath him, rides onto the dirt shoulder, gets out of the saddle, and hammers it joining the line where he left off. Cool as shit. His dad was there and couldn't have been more proud. The little fucker had guns too.

1 2 3 76
Share
Published by
frank

Recent Posts

Anatomy of a Photo: Sock & Shoe Game

I know as well as any of you that I've been checked out lately, kind…

6 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Men’s World Championship Road Race 2017

Peter Sagan has undergone quite the transformation over the years; starting as a brash and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Women’s World Championship Road Race 2017

The Women's road race has to be my favorite one-day road race after Paris-Roubaix and…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Vuelta a España 2017

Holy fuckballs. I've never been this late ever on a VSP. I mean, I've missed…

7 years ago

Velominati Super Prestige: Clasica Ciclista San Sebastian 2017

This week we are currently in is the most boring week of the year. After…

7 years ago

Route Finding

I have memories of my life before Cycling, but as the years wear slowly on…

7 years ago