Categories: Breaking The RulesEtiquetteLa Vie VelominatusLook Pro

The Book and the Cover

The Lion King was once a Pedalwan cub, just as the rest of us. Guide the uninitiated.

I rode with a rider I know from work a few weeks ago. The first time we sat in a meeting together, we immediately pegged one another as a Cyclist the way Cyclists always peg one another; nothing specific or obvious but everything nonspecific and nonobvious. It’s what we do, you can’t learn it and it can’t be explained. Then he mentioned he had driven to Seattle from SoCal with his dog and his bike and I was sure. This wasn’t a Harley he was talking about, this was a road bike.

As leaders of our respective teams, we immediately directed the agenda to measuring up one another’s bikes.

Me: “What bike do you ride?”

Him: “I brought my rain bike when I moved here. It’s a Pinarello Prince. My good bike is a Dogma. What do you ride?”

Me: “A Veloforma Strada iR. My rain bike is a Cervelo R3.”

Him: “What groupsets?”

It went on a bit before he turned to the everyone else and explained the situation in layman’s terms. “The conversation we’re having here is that we both have a Ferrari except the Ferrari got a little old and we bought a newer Ferrari. Except we didn’t get rid of the old Ferrari because you just don’t do that. Too many memories. So then you wind up with a Ferrari you ride in bad weather and one that you ride in good.”

When our schedules finally meshed to the point that we got together for a ride, he invited two of his colleagues along with him; one a long-time training partner and one a younger guy he’d never ridden with who showed up on a heavy no-name steel bike with a 90’s-era Shimano 105 8 speed groupsan. And platform pedals. And a t-shirt. And sneakers.

“Are you running or riding?”

We all had a chuckle and set off on a jaunty 80km spin, not too hard but not too easy. Sneakers held on the whole way. He got gapped a little on the bigger climbs but laid down the power to catch up again and sat in the group like a Pro; drafting close, taking the corners well, and rotating through into the wind. And always with a smile on his face.

As the ride wound down, the friend I’d sized up in the meeting sat up and pointed at me and said, “You rode like I expected you to ride.” Then he pointed at Sneakers and said, “And you rode so much harder than I ever expected. If you had a better bike, you’d be dropping us all. You’re an amazing athlete.” Everyone agreed.

I’ve been in touch with Sneakers, a new Pedalwan. He picked up some clipless pedals first, then a bit later he scored a new bike off CraigsList. He’s caught the bug, and catching the bug is what its all about.

Never judge a book by it’s cover. Behind every platform pedal riding, sneaker and t-shirt wearing bicyclist lurks a potential Velominatus.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

Next Viva Il Giro »

Previous « Voyeurs

View Comments

JasonR says:

May 31 2015 at 10:51 am

@Gabriel David Oh, man. Couldn't disagree more on the sappy faux-dramatic stuff that American TV did back in the day. The exact opposite of the awesome Phil Liggett commentatary and European coverage. It always felt really insulting, like I'm too stupid to enjoy cycling for what it is, they have to attach swelling music and slow mo of sweat dripping off someone's nose. Even when Pharmstrong was making his run the CBS Sunday recap was unwatchable, with Armen Kateyian's cringe-inducing stabs at Homeric poetics. Just my opinion though. Long live Phil and Paul.
ped says:

May 31 2015 at 11:10 am

Long live Phil and Paul.

Oh-mer-ta!
wilburrox says:

May 31 2015 at 11:21 am

@Minnesota Expat

@Gianni

The Cipo photo is priceless.

That picture creeps me out. It looks like a photo of the “Damian” child from the movie and/or a photo from a propaganda film about Hitler Youth sports programs. Let’s have another article and a picture of a guy grinding up a gravel road in the Pyrenees or someplace.

That photo is creepy and I think he is too. I didn't follow racing when he was racing. I only know of him what I see today. Creepy. I'm sure he's great guy and one bad ass cyclist. But his persona is just plain creepy weird. But that's what makes the world an interesting place! Weirdos. Cheers all
wilburrox says:

May 31 2015 at 11:23 am

@ped

If Cipollini had been here…………

Photo

I can't help but smile when looking at this picture. There's a lot here that also what makes the world an interesting place yes!
Teocalli says:

May 31 2015 at 11:49 am

@wilburrox

My VMW tells me there are a couple of bikes in that photo. Darned if I can spot them though.
will says:

May 31 2015 at 12:22 pm

@wilburrox

please don't use the word creepy. it's a word used by the worst kind of women. a man shouldn't find things 'creepy.'
gilly says:

May 31 2015 at 12:43 pm

@stooge

Like Gabriel David, I too was star struck by the big name racers in 1986. I had just turned 11. I’d recently moved to a new city, had left behind my BMX club racing and had not yet found one to join. On a winter’s day that year I caught some of the Tour highlights which at that time was aired on Wide World of Sports on Sundays here in Aus. I watched it every week and was hooked. I thought “that’s what I wanna do”. I bugged my parents for a road bike. The man at the LBS said “you’re too small, come back when you can stand over this”. I was not pleased. A year passed and I watched the Tour again. I begged to return to see if I had grown sufficiently. I wore three pairs of football socks and the shoes with the thickest soles I could find. I could only just get over the top tube and the bike was purchased. I did a few crits but soon gave up on it, in preference for other sports. Still, I road that bike to school every day (in the clips) and everywhere else I went, and maintained it perfectly. I kept it until I grew out of it and passed it on. I’ve had a road bike at all times since. In the mid 90s I got into mountain bike XC. I used to swap out the dirt tires for slicks every Monday morning and commute all week and swap them back on weekends. I mostly used platforms because it was my work commute, shopping, going to dinner and movies, and everywhere else bike. I just hated driving if I could possibly wangle a ride. In my early 30s I got lazy with the bike. Occasional weekend MTB trips and short rides to the shop were the extent of it. Then one day I went for a ride with some of my old road buddies and nearly died. I was riding my Fuji Tourer and vomited after the second climb, trying to keep up. Things had to change so I got myself a CAAD 10. I got bike fit, but it took much longer than I thought it would.

Nowadays I still ride the CAAD 10. Ninety percent of bike time is on a light steel frame single speed. I use reverse-able SPDs and sometimes I clip and sometimes I don’t. For rides of <50km the single speed is much more fun and I get a better workout. No choice but to go hard often to keep the cadence up because momentum is king when you’ve got one gear. I usually wear MTB shorts and a wool tshirt. I get a lot of advice from well meaning roadies after they see me out a few times or I ask if I can hang on their wheel for a bit in the wind. It’s cool when this happens and I’ve made some friends. I get a lot of sniggers too. I usually avoid those guys from then on. If they aren’t that fit I might keep an eye out for them and sneak up and gas past them when the opportunity arises. It’s childish, but I get laugh.

I’ve always had an uneasy relationship with rules, empty authority, and sheepish behaviour. Guidance is cool. Put offs are not cool. Anyone showing the slightest interest in cycling (of any form) should be encouraged in a way that is actually encouraging. The more people on bikes, the better, in my opinion.

My son is 26 months and has had a balance bike for a couple of months. The first thing he says in the morning is often “Bike!”. Same thing after his mid day nap and after his evening bath. He also comes and sits next to me whilst I’m at the computer and says “bike video”, wanting to see some cycling. No more encouragement needed than simply allowing him to ride. It’s early days, but I think we have another one…

Check out this picture of great grand father Stooge 100 years ago. The Stooges – breaking all the rules for a century:

Rule #8 amended to "match the moustache to the handlebars"
Ron says:

May 31 2015 at 2:39 pm

Picked up my first road bike in 2003, an oversized, used Cannondale. I then rode my first race, a criterium in 2005. I was in sneakers with toe clips, I also dive bombed in corners. Goddamn. Now so much seems like second nature. I'm always happy to share with newcomers, as I was there not long ago.

Went to a criterium race in Winston-Salem, NC yesterday, with the VMH and the dogs. What other sport allows you to walk through the team van parking lots and the PRO women, who just finished, want to pet your dog? Can't imagine that happening after an NBA or NFL game. The Cipollini team women loved the dogs. I told them they should be back home in Milan for the finish. They definitely didn't understand my English.
wilburrox says:

May 31 2015 at 4:01 pm

@will

@wilburrox

please don’t use the word creepy. it’s a word used by the worst kind of women. a man shouldn’t find things ‘creepy.’

Hmmmm... that's an interesting thought. Now if I google search creepy images there are some clown photos that I'm not sure what other word I'd use to describe. Makes me want to go back to the wonderful umbrella photo. That's a joyous photo. Happy photo. The very opposite of creepy. But, the dude lying on the ground snapping photos from interesting angles? We'd call him a little.... Creative? Cheers!
Oli says:

May 31 2015 at 6:18 pm

@will

@wilburrox

please don’t use the word creepy. it’s a word used by the worst kind of women. a man shouldn’t find things ‘creepy.’

"The worst kind of women"...? I find the inference in that statement very creepy.