Along the lines of what Bruce Dickinson famously decreed while espousing the medical benefits of cowbell in the remedy of rare types of influenza, I put my shoes on one at a time – just like you. But after I’ve got my shoes on, I ooze fluidly harmonic articulation.
As Cyclists, we wield the mighty power of The V, yet lay victim to the nagging whispers of Doubt, from which the Anti-V draws its strength. We train our bodies, keep our machines in perfect order, and maintain a variety of kit for every type of weather, only to waver as this poison bleeds into our minds. We counter by seeking to control the uncontrollable through a strict adherence to ritual prior to and following each of our rides.
The ritual surrounding the ride is unique to each of us, and evolves over time, and perpetuates those actions which yielded better-then-usual rides. For instance, despite being right-handed, I slip into my shoes left first, and moving through a systematic process of buckling them up prior to each bike. I sit down on the front steps, pause for a moment to draw in a breath, slip out of my Adilettes, and slip into my shoes.
I start by arranging the tongue of first the left shoe, then the right. Then I secure the front velcro strap on the left before moving to do the same on the right. Once I’m satisfied that both straps are of precisely equal tension, I will move to tighten the left buckle, then the right until similarly satisfied of tension equality. Changing this process in any way, I’m convinced, would yield utter chaos.
Ritual goes far beyond how we put our shoes on; it reaches into the maintenance of our machines as well as their preparation for a ride as well as preparation of bidons and our kit. Bits of my ritual change based on whether I am riding from home or some other location, whether the ride is a big one or just a daily jaunt, or whether it is a formal event for which I have prepared carefully. Other things, however, remain fixed.
I always inflate the rear tire first, never the front. I’ll pull on the front and rear brakes to make sure the cables didn’t fall out overnight, and run through all the gears – listening for silence – even though I’ll have tuned it after arriving home last time if any tuning was required. When I pull on my kit, bibs go on first, socks second, under-vest third. Only at this point do I consider other elements such as whether I’m wearing arm and/or knee warmers, or which jersey to put on. Lastly, I’ll carefully inspect my toolkit prior to tucking it into my middle rear pocket.
I suppose that at the center of this lies a simple belief: in a world wherein much lies out of my control, I represent but a simple cell of a larger organism. I cannot say what influence these actions have, but if the past is any indication of the future, these actions have helped keep me happily pedaling my bike. To stop would be to tempt Fate itself.
Therefor, I wrap myself in ritual to control the uncontrollable. Vive la Vie Velominatus.
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Nice ritual. Apparently mine is to prepare the bike for an early morning ride and then to get violently ill overnight. Works for me. Great way to lose those extra kgs.
Oh yes! Always followed rituals from all the sports I played growing up, to cycling these days, and beyond. Damn, I'm even the type to count things when I don't have to, not in an out-of-my-mind way, but I will catch myself counting say the number of times I've pushed the pump down when inflating my tires before a ride.
Nice one, Frank! Are those white or silver shoes? Hard to tell. And did the same size work as you work in Sidis?
Ritual is awesome. It just makes life easier, makes my free time when I don't have any that much better.
Luckily for us the cameras were rolling...
My undershirt goes on before my bibs - always.
Bidons filled, or water filtered, then the bike leaves the man cave, then the bidons go on.
The contents of my pockets rarely change, but how they are organized is always different. Always.
I never eat breakfast before a morning training ride.
Race warm ups are standardized for the length of the race. Oh, and I am a complete bag of nerves for any event that requires registration, no mater how trivial.
Nice article and interesting ritual. I won't bore everyone with mine, but I guess part of the whole deal is rthat we have some many asprects of preparation for a ride that are the same (clothing, bike, essentials, food and drink) yet so many variables (length of ride, weather, solo v's group) and that we are riding something that needs to be carefully maintained. The danger (and necessity of ritual) is that so much of it becomes second nature yet therein lies the danger in forgetting something. Calm, collected ritual is necessary as to do otherwise can jeopardize the quality of the whole experience.
I'm a recent convert to la Vie Velominatus, currently living in France and working as an au pair. I'm on a limited budget but I managed to purchase a 1984 Peugeot PH-LS on the French version of craigslist. Everyone in my cycling group (40-something French men) laughs at my toe clips setup and I'm considering the switch to clipless pedals so I can further my quest for the Magnificent Stroke as well as have another sacrament to add to my ritual.
This is my current setup:
Should I heed their advice? What are some budget priced pedals that are reliable and good for novice cyclists like myself?
@zeitzmar
Sweet - you need a pair of bright red Look Carbons...
In my Bont donning ritual I find it helps to char the right toe bumper in the oven first
I think at the centre of this is actually some severe OCD.
Don't know if I'm the only one, but I never fully tighten the straps on my shoes until after I'm on the bike. So I guess that's my ritual.
@zeitzmar Welcome! I noticed on your profile you went to school in Iowa, where'd you go? My wife is an Iowan and I went to grad school there. Anyway, the bike looks sharp as is, but I will say clipless pedals are fantastic and worth a try. You can find budget pedals like low end Shimano for around 50 usd. But I'd poke around your bike shop, do some tryouts if possible, and find what works for you.