Guest Anatomy of a Photo: Here We Rest

photo by Camille McMillan

@steampunk dropped this beauty of a photo on us. Volumes being spoken here, none of which makes being a pro look so great. Thanks Steamy.

VLVV, Gianni

I’ve waxed lyrical on the darker side of le métier on these pages in the past””on the physical and psychological demands that pro riders endure. But this photograph requires even more of the cycling fan. Tan lines? Check. Eye wear? Well placed. These are pro, right?

But this kind of voyeurism almost inspires an awkward kind of guilt. Witness: the still-open door; the suitcase stand still leaning against the wall””suitcase dumped on the floor beside it; shoes (as beaten and worn down as the rider) askew in the general vicinity of the shoe mat. How do we process these? Dingy hotel. Emaciated rider. Sun-burned face. Chapped lips. Hunched shoulders. Heavy head. Distant eyes. Broken. Total, utter, complete fatigue. And tomorrow they expect panache. Again.

Steampunk

In never-ending search for la voluptÃ©, Steampunk is an unreconstructed Canadian west coaster transplanted to Ontario, where he rides on every opportunity and sometimes shows up to work as a professor of history. He is a careful student of the Rules and la vie Velominatus, but is not beyond (occasionally) distilling them down to a single path: la vie Cognoscentus. The BFGs are always locked and loaded (that sound you just heard was your soul being crushed by their power). On a more serious note, he is a staunch advocate of commuting by bike and he also fundraises for Bikes to Rwanda.

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View Comments

Cyclops says:

Jan 7 2013 at 8:59 am

I can relate to this photo. We Velominati obsess with the desire to "look pro" and yet when we return from a ride where copious amounts of V were sprayed about we, or should I say "I", usually dismount the bike, kick off the Pepe Le Pews, take off the jersey, pull the bib straps down and flop on the couch and relish that ethereal tug-of-war between the desire to fall asleep and the craving to stay awake and enjoy the endorphins. Most happily is seems (from the photo above) that though I am sprawled on the couch, HRM strap dangling loosely from a strengthless hand, pasty white torso glaring, etc. that I am indeed "looking pro". Save the extra 16k of girth but I'm working on that too.
sengelov says:

Jan 7 2013 at 9:56 am

"Pasty white torso" was mentioned, and this came to my mind. -The tan lines are OK.
Kyle says:

Jan 7 2013 at 10:22 am

@Steampunk Definite upgrade from all of those Aussies.
Cyclops says:

Jan 7 2013 at 11:04 am

"We Are the Robots..."
Ron says:

Jan 7 2013 at 12:52 pm

@Cyclops

I can relate to this photo. We Velominati obsess with the desire to "look pro" and yet when we return from a ride where copious amounts of V were sprayed about we, or should I say "I", usually dismount the bike, kick off the Pepe Le Pews, take off the jersey, pull the bib straps down and flop on the couch and relish that ethereal tug-of-war between the desire to fall asleep and the craving to stay awake and enjoy the endorphins. Most happily is seems (from the photo above) that though I am sprawled on the couch, HRM strap dangling loosely from a strengthless hand, pasty white torso glaring, etc. that I am indeed "looking pro". Save the extra 16k of girth but I'm working on that too.

Hey...relax a bit! I thought you looked at pretty good fightin' weight in your submission for Photo of the Year!
Deakus says:

Jan 7 2013 at 1:03 pm

@sengelov

"Pasty white torso" was mentioned, and this came to my mind. -The tan lines are OK.

Shit I thought that was a top he was pulling down at first!
wiscot says:

Jan 7 2013 at 1:10 pm

Being from Scotland, I thought I was highly familiar with the pasty white skin affliction. This, however, takes the prize. I mean, has that torso EVER been exposed to direct sunlight? To really win the prize, join the dots and try and figure out which country he was in when he said he wasn't there.
Nate says:

Jan 7 2013 at 1:56 pm

@sengelov

Please pass the fork. I need to gouge out my eyes.
markpa says:

Jan 8 2013 at 7:50 pm

I thought the starting image was just Frank post Haleakala Round IIV
gilly says:

Oct 2 2015 at 3:50 pm

@Deakus

@sengelov

“Pasty white torso” was mentioned, and this came to my mind. -The tan lines are OK.

Shit I thought that was a top he was pulling down at first!

Hate hate hate that chicken motherfucker