@frank
Well, I was cycling to school on my own at around age 6, on fietspaden, so I’m a bit dutch, yes. Though, now when I go back to visit family, it’s obvious my spoken dutch is quite rusty and doesn’t flow well, and, sadly, I even have a bit of a foreigners accent. ;)

Spent the weekend at home with my parents; while I speak so much English at home these days, I still dream and think in Dutch, so that helps me keep my Dutch OK, though my written Dutch, because I virtually NEVER do it, is almost lost.

But coming back home, I”m finding myself speaking Dutch to the VMH, which doesn’t work. Those wires cross back quickly. But my Dutch is antiquated as well, when I go back, I get made fun of for speaking 70’s Dutch.

Gotta get in shape for cx racing though. Five weeks off the bike the past two months. I’m really going to work hard this month, see if I can snap myself into decent form.

Well, I was cycling to school on my own at around age 6, on fietspaden, so I’m a bit dutch, yes. Though, now when I go back to visit family, it’s obvious my spoken dutch is quite rusty and doesn’t flow well, and, sadly, I even have a bit of a foreigners accent. ;)

@Paul Jakma
inspiring work, I assume you are Dutch

Must be. Which is the equivalent of saying he’s awesome.

So long as you’re being a dick about anything- language, cycling, nationalities, you’ll fit in well here. It’s 99% of what we do. We just try to be funny dicks. Welcome.

Basically, the word for “white” is “wit”. Similarly, the dutch for black is “zwart”, declined to “zwarte” when prefixed to nouns. And the title should maybe be “Zwart, wit, winter”. ;)

Apologies for being a language dick.

The drakes face probably.

@paolo More like you typed with a cat’s cock…

I did….so fucking small..and he wriggles a lot.

@paolo

Frank..the cat’s cock? I never heard that. The dogs bollocks yes..but the cats cock. Are cat’s cocks really all that ??

And the Dogs Bollocks are all that?

Yeah. They really are.

@frank

Hold your tongue. We don’t get much of it round these parts and we like to keep it as long as we can. The arm warmers are already coming with on most rides these days.

I’m starting to worry about you. Arm warmers in August? Sunny pics, too? By the looks of the White Ladies, they don’t seem to have got much of a tan, either: I’d be very disappointed to learn of any Rule 23 violations…

@paolo

Frank..the cat’s cock? I never heard that. The dogs bollocks yes..but the cats cock. Are cat’s cocks really all that ??

And the Dogs Bollocks are all that?

They’re probably harder to type with.

Frank..the cat’s cock? I never heard that. The dogs bollocks yes..but the cats cock. Are cat’s cocks really all that ??

And the Dogs Bollocks are all that?

@RedRanger

@Ron
Can’t wait till summer is really over. I just heard on the radio that this summer was the 2nd hottest in the record books.

Hold your tongue. We don’t get much of it round these parts and we like to keep it as long as we can. The arm warmers are already coming with on most rides these days.

After I get my A&P I’m heading up your way to escape this shit. It was well over 41c!

Frank..the cat’s cock? I never heard that. The dogs bollocks yes..but the cats cock. Are cat’s cocks really all that ??

@RedRanger

@RonCan’t wait till summer is really over. I just heard on the radio that this summer was the 2nd hottest in the record books.

Hold your tongue. We don’t get much of it round these parts and we like to keep it as long as we can. The arm warmers are already coming with on most rides these days.

Just to make you guys a little more jealous, we’ve just finished winter here in South Australia with an August that had an average daily max temperature of 18C and September has just kicked off with one day at 25 & today’s on its way to 26.

Can someone say perfect riding weather? Tan lines are already being formed.

@Ron
Can’t wait till summer is really over. I just heard on the radio that this summer was the 2nd hottest in the record books.

Hold your tongue. We don’t get much of it round these parts and we like to keep it as long as we can. The arm warmers are already coming with on most rides these days.

@Ron
Awesome site; I could bankrupt myself on cycling caps. Especially old school ones like those. Too cool for school.

Is this the shit Castelli cap?I was thinking about getting one in white and one in black since I’ve ordered the white kit. But if it sucks, I won’t get it.

That one’s OK, though it’s not the best cap I’ve ever had.

Here are the bad ones:

Or this one

As opposed to this where the visor is the right size.

And there are more examples. You can tell the visor is too big, as compared to a proper cap.

By the way, this is also a disaster; hadn’t seen it before. Back in my day, we just lopped off the top of a regular cap and sewed it down crappily. It was class.

Gracias!

http://www.prendas.co.uk/details.asp?typ=tea&fkid=39&ID=2209

Those lads have pretty much all our Velominati Awesome Old School kit needs covered. I actually try to stay off their site or else I could bankrupt not only my Velo-bank but my regular bank account as well. Tons of awesome jerseys and everything else ya need.

@scaler911
Please. Everyone. Enough with the Videos. Performance was cute. But these things you can’t un – see. When I’m a burnt out ex velominati living on the street, juggling unicycles and licking cycling caps for a buzz I’ll blame you, Scaler. I’ll blame you.

Ya. Cross season gets a little out of control here. I don’t race ‘cross, but I do try and go watch a couple races a season.

@mcsqueak @Nate
In January and February. Maybe.
I whine like a spoiled brat when the temp gets under 10C.
Rule #9 is all about heat and humidity here. Heat index has been around 40C since I can’t remember when. It’s 5am right now and the heat index is 30C. The chickens are laying hard boiled eggs.

Rule V. Seriously, Dude. This is why you’re a broken nation.

Up here in the Great White North, we do summer at 40 with the humidex, and will get down to -20 come January. And I’ll ride. And I won’t go claiming Rule 9 every twenty minutes. I’ll just ride. I suspect Marko can relate…

Here’s another Castelli cap. The color looks Dutch Monkey orange to me. But the bill still looks too long. And the price costs an arm and a leg.

I whine like a spoiled brat when the temp gets under 10C.

Rule 9 is all about heat and humidity here. Heat index has been around 40C since I can’t remember when. It’s 5am right now and the heat index is 30C. The chickens are laying hard boiled eggs.

@RedRanger
We should be happy with a non-Castelli cap. I have one, and I think it’s been discussed in these pages previously, but the Castelli caps are quite Out of Dish as the brim is too big. I.e. they are too much like Chiappucci’s ill-fitting lid, not enough like Big Mig’s impeccable style.
Again, I’ll point you to the Pro line. Castelli makes a cap which is complete shit. They also make a cap which is the cat’s cock. That is the one we would have made, but The V-Mom cap is looking more like the ticket at the moment.

@frank
True that. Just got my Castelli Cervelo Test Team cap in the mail today. Nothing but the tits

True that. Just got my Castelli Cervelo Test Team cap in the mail today. Nothing but the tits

You should get this one:

I think it would pair well with faux bluejean bibs.

@scaler911
Oh scaler you ain’t seen nothin man. Ever been to Burning Man?

Yes I have. But figured that’s not really cycling related. Not that the Cross Crusade here is either.

frank:
Swarte didn’t look right but I figured I was wrong after typing Swarte into Google and not getting an alternative suggestion. Knowing K-Dog, he was probably deliberately trying to get under my skin by using the “dirty” Dutch (Afrikaans) and I was too dense to notice.

It’s funny how when you’re working on something letters and numbers stop looking like letters and numbers are start to just look like symbols. I was just walking by the grocery store and there was a girl outside popping those letters and numbers onto the big sign above the store, with the big long suction cup stick thing to put the letters/numbers up.

She stops me and asks, “Does the ‘4’ go that way?” and points up at the sign to where she had the number 4 pointing to the right instead of the left. My first thought was, “Are you illiterate?” but then I realized she’d just gotten to the point where none of what she was looking at looked like letters or numbers…all just squiggly lines.

Now I blame this condition, and not K-Dog, for my screwing up the word Zwarte.

@RedRanger
No links.

@Nate

@RedRanger
We should be happy with a non-Castelli cap. I have one, and I think it’s been discussed in these pages previously, but the Castelli caps are quite Out of Dish as the brim is too big. I.e. they are too much like Chiappucci’s ill-fitting lid, not enough like Big Mig’s impeccable style.

Again, I’ll point you to the Pro line. Castelli makes a cap which is complete shit. They also make a cap which is the cat’s cock. That is the one we would have made, but The V-Mom cap is looking more like the ticket at the moment.

Is that supposed to be a link for the v mom cap? It’s not working.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tqWqVX46WU

And (this will probably get me a lifetime ban from VM for all the rule violations and just posting it):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0_GbPVkv9k

@RedRanger
We should be happy with a non-Castelli cap. I have one, and I think it’s been discussed in these pages previously, but the Castelli caps are quite Out of Dish as the brim is too big. I.e. they are too much like Chiappucci’s ill-fitting lid, not enough like Big Mig’s impeccable style.

Again, I’ll point you to the Pro line. Castelli makes a cap which is complete shit. They also make a cap which is the cat’s cock. That is the one we would have made, but the V-Mom cap is looking more like the ticket at the moment.

@Ron
You’d best bring a bike unless you want to ride my 8sp trainer.

OCD, of course, doesn’t mean you’re detail-oriented or right or anything like that. I just means we’re a bit nuts.

Your problem, not Franks? ;-)

You are correct. Just admiting to it. Don’t want to come across as a kit snob. I am far from it.

@Steampunk
@frank
I was mostly referig to the gloves. If the socks aren’t Castelli I can live with that. But gloves should really be Castelli. I feel strongly that the cap should be as well but I can live with a non Castelli cap.

Mixing and matching is, however, not necessarily un-Pro. The Pros are told what to ride, we have the luxury of picking and choosing the best of whats available in our price range.

@frank
I was mostly referig to the gloves. If the socks aren’t Castelli I can live with that. But gloves should really be Castelli. I feel strongly that the cap should be as well but I can live with a non Castelli cap.

@Cyclops

@sgt

@frankWould socks be asking too much? I know the minimums are beastly for socks, but they’d be the icing on the cake.

I’ve been nagging him about socks too. Actually Champ-Sys minimums for sock is WAY lower than the Sock Guy and the like. I know it would be Champ-Sys but how bad can you screw up socks?

Have you ever worn good socks? Change your life. Shit socks? You’ll get blisters and other things that we really don’t need to be getting on top of all the other suffering we go through.
I’m waiting for samples from Champ-Sys, actually. They also now offer a cotton cap; although one of our community member’s mother has sent me a home made cap which is the complete bomb-digity, which means we may be offering a hand-made cotton cycling cap. How cool is THAT?
The Champ-Sys shit has to be good enough to carry The V-Name. I’ve also implored Castelli one last time to go easy on the minimums, and am waiting on a response.
The items we’d like to add, Merckx-willing, are socks, gloves, and caps. Like I said, I’m waiting on Champ-Sys which have better numbers (both qty’s and price) and if they are good enough to carry The V, we may see some more products showing up in the near future.

Having bought a bunch of different sets of gear through Champ-Sys, my take is that their bottom of the range (super cheap) stuff has a commensurate level of quality. In terms of socks, the cheapest ones were pox – the expensive ones have been pretty good.

You get what you pay for…

@Ron
Where in Cali is your brother? In the Bay Area myself.

Nice work, sgt! Alright, if I visit my brother sometime this fall I’ll try and arrange a visit. I have hopes we’ll have a strong network of Velominati spread out across the globe so that when each of us travels all we have to pack is pedals, helmet, and kit and we can get some riding in. That would be awesome. A global V-Team. As it is now we have Seattle, Idaho, western Canada, HI, NZ, eastern Oz…and more.

As for gloves, my favorite pair are some really slick rainbow crocheted ones from prendas. Not that well made, but they’re just for special days. Curious about the Giro The LX mitts, look great, have very similar ones (forget the maker) that have not held up well. I do have some PI mitts that are going on five years old and are in fantastic shape. Killed me to pay $45 for them (was only a nascent Follower) but they look brand new. That’s a strong statement for mitts.

I don’t think so!

@Ron
C’mon out! The Santa Ynez Valley has some awesome riding!

@Gianni
More significantly, did you see he snuck another of those fucking Adilettes into the frame again?

Hey hey hey! At least he stands behind (and on top of, hur hur hur) the things he buys. Am yet to see any photos of your helmet mirror, Bretto has a camera don’t he?

Ooh, a late September trip to CA. Hmm, might be awesome & I do have a brother who lives in that wacky state.

if they are good enough to carry The V, we may see some more products showing up in the near future.

Fuck yeah!

My next little project is a V-race number tag. Gotta make it Look Pro. A small piece of white plastic like you see on Pro Bikes, and yes, cognizant of Rule 75, it will only be worn when appropriate. Since I am not a racer, it will only go on for events. Nothing pisses me off more than to get some Merckx-awful cardboard number the organizers expect me to put on with garbage bage ties on my bars. No Fucking Way. Even worse is when they do this to my VMH, who rides a Cervelo with aero shaped tubes. Then push a plate a 100 miles? Bullshit.

So, the race number will be like those nice race ones, attached to the rear brake caliper. Where you usually see “Vittel” or the race sponsor on the tag? Yeah – mine will sport a Velominati decal. The number itself will be the removalable/changable vinyl decals.

Actually, someone wanting to make a lot of money could probably offer these to event organizers. I’ll pin a number on, but No Bullshit On My Bike.

Nice togs, too.

@Ron
I’m still planning a ride to commemorate the WC in Solvang, CA (closest thing to Denmark this side of the pond) on Sept. 25. 100-120km, 2k climbing, on the best roads we have to offer. Who’s in?

@frank
What I prefer about the Formared over the Castelli is the more modest branding (along the outside of the hand””visible while riding, but not such a prominent part of the glove). Those Castellis do look sweet, though.

@RedRanger
Very valid point.

Must be the LOOKs we ride. Oh, and great work on the new gig. Shop discounts sound incredible.

Holy cannoli. Is this the Big & Tall V-Team? How many of you lads over 6’3″ and over? Goodness. At least I’ll have plenty of wheels to sit on during the inaugural Velominati Group Ride.

Gianni – Good eye, but I call baloney. We all know Frank was screwing around on vacation and dog sitting. That book is just a ploy to make his teachers happy as school starts. He ain’t been studyin’, he’s been dueling with volcanoes.

You’re right, I’ve repented and thrown myself before the Merckxy Seat. I have plenty of cycling socks that I never wear because they suck. I’ve just been blinded by the need for V-Socks and lost sight of “you get what you pay for”. I guess it’s quality socks V-Socks of no V-Socks.

@pakrat
Thanks, I’m definitely going with the XL – even if its a little snug at first it will be perfect when I peak in two months
@Cyclops
I didn’t realise the podium shoes were available to the general public (or are they just available to state champions?)- I would totally rock the shit out of those at the office…

You should be able to get them at fine podium shoe store everywhere. Or at least Specialized/S-Works dealers. My cost on them will be about $85 so they probably retail around $150.

@frank
Agreed. Life’s too short to wear shit socks. But while we’re on the topic, I hate Castelli gloves. Too much padding, scratchy material (not good for nose wiping) and those assinine pull-thingy’s between the fingers. I like these, or these, in case anyone cares…

You’re obviously not wearing the Aero Race Glove. I have the Giro gloves you’re referencing and these kick the piss out of them. Very thin and form fitting, hardly any padding at all.

I actually don’t like Castelli’s stuff unless it’s their absolute top-end, but I’ve probably been overly spoiled.

And the idea of a cap lovingly sewn by a V-Mom makes me positively tingly

It happen’s to be @Souleur‘s V-Mom.

Starting the countdown timer now on when someone will comment on my kickass sandals.

@RedRanger

I think the kit should stay as close to 100% Castelli. The pros don’t mix and match brands.

Right you are. We’re doing our best.

@VeloVita
Talk amongst yourself.

Perhaps I could call on fellow 6’3″³ 195lb (1.91m, 88kg for Rule #24 compliance) Velominati for a little guidance?

Gianni at your service, how may I direct your missive? I too am those dimensions and also hung like a giant pit lemur. Oh sorry, you aren’t? My condolences. Where was I, oh right, Jersey xl. Bibs 2xl. Boom, done and fookin’ dusted jimmy!
Fret no more.

And the idea of a cap lovingly sewn by a V-Mom makes me positively tingly.

@Souleur
I’m a 6cm guy myself

If your not careful saying crap like that you will be religated back to Cat5 shit zone. Thats a Rule of the peloton, everything matters…everything

have you ever worn a fine castelli sock that is made purposely to fit the mid-foot, with an Italian seamstress that has drank more wine and ate more cheese thinking of how to make a novel design for YOU? A sock with fabric that is purposed to make you ‘not feel a thing’ is right, then you compare that to others and you can see differences

Ok, try it, its usually a $10 bill

I prefer mine precisely 6″ above the ankles in a Euro-pro-cool w/preferred racing stripes up the Achilles
wool in winter
thin goods in summer

@sgt

@frank
Would socks be asking too much? I know the minimums are beastly for socks, but they’d be the icing on the cake.

I’ve been nagging him about socks too. Actually Champ-Sys minimums for sock is WAY lower than the Sock Guy and the like. I know it would be Champ-Sys but how bad can you screw up socks?

Have you ever worn good socks? Change your life. Shit socks? You’ll get blisters and other things that we really don’t need to be getting on top of all the other suffering we go through.

I’m waiting for samples from Champ-Sys, actually. They also now offer a cotton cap; although one of our community member’s mother has sent me a home made cap which is the complete bomb-digity, which means we may be offering a hand-made cotton cycling cap. How cool is THAT?

The Champ-Sys shit has to be good enough to carry the V-Name. I’ve also implored Castelli one last time to go easy on the minimums, and am waiting on a response.

The items we’d like to add, Merckx-willing, are socks, gloves, and caps. Like I said, I’m waiting on Champ-Sys which have better numbers (both qty’s and price) and if they are good enough to carry the V, we may see some more products showing up in the near future.

I hate to say this, but Swart is Afrikaans… If you insist on it being Dutch, or even Flemish, you will have to call it Zwarte Kit…

That’s so annoying. And you’re absolutely right. I blame KRX-10, who is not Dutch and doesn’t insist on being so, for jokingly calling it Swarte because I was referring (also jokingly) to the white kit as the Witte Kitte. Swarte didn’t look right but I figured I was wrong after typing Swarte into Google and not getting an alternative suggestion. Knowing K-Dog, he was probably deliberately trying to get under my skin by using the “dirty” Dutch (Afrikaans) and I was too dense to notice.

Says something about the state of your life when Google’s suggestions are a more meaningful (and erroneous) barometer on spelling and grammar than is your education. Merckx, that’s embarrassing.

Thanks for the correction – it’s been updated.

Ugh, I use to make websites for side money as well, but I can’t stand working with the clients. “Change this, no change this… can’t you just make it do this? That should be easy… just this one other LITTLE thing I forgot to mention…” and on and on. Bah! A bike shop site would be a good gig, though.

I think Custom DeFeet wool socks would be GREAT, but their minimum is 144 pairs. That is a lot of socks… they would probably get sold eventually, but that’s a lot of money up-front for Frank and the crew.

I reckon. The idea of me trying to clamber aboard one of Frank’s bikes would be like getting a colonoscopy from a submarine.

@pakrat

Hah, yeah… it’ll be awesome to be passed while going up hills in the fancy-schmancy kit and be mocked for it at the same time. Oh well, there is no rule about having to “go fast”, you just need to be able to suffer!

I’d love to order ASAP (and if I get this new job I will because it’ll come with a nice raise), but I have some trips and car repairs (ugh) to pay for before summer is out so my fun money is spoken for at the moment. Sad face.

I’m definitely going to get the “traditional” bibs and jersey first, with arm-warmers and the gillet. But I’m thinking the white jersey would look pretty dope with the white side-panels of the original bibs as well.