The climber in a gorilla suit is a mysterious beast.
There is a force upon this world which governs all manner of voodoo and wizardry. This force ensures the streak in your windshield wiper is always precisely at eye level. It ensures that the phone call goes to voicemail just as you touch the “answer” button. It ensures that a product which you endlessly encountered but did not need will vanish into oblivion the moment it becomes of use.
The more time I spend as a Cyclist, the more apparent it becomes to me that this force also controls which of us are to become good climbers or bad climbers. I will never be a good climber, however much I enjoy it; I am much too big for it. But I climb well enough for my weight because I enjoy the work and the suffering. I enjoy testing to see how far I can push myself.
I see small, powerful riders and I imagine they must go uphill like a whisper on the wind, but when the climb comes, they drift back in the group and disappear down the road the wrong way. The mysterious force has decreed that they shall not be a good climber, especially for their weight.
Most mysterious is the large rider who goes uphill like a beast; they are too big, too heavy, and too strong to defy gravity like the mountain goats do, with none of the grace and fluidity that the true grimpeur holds. Yet they go to the front and heap coals on the fire, sending everyone on their wheel deep into the pain cave. This rider is the Climber in a Gorilla Suit, and they are the sleeper agents of the peloton.
Look out; there likely is one lurking on the group ride tonight.
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At 174cm and 65kilos I go up hill pretty well. Road races with long sustained climbs, many of them, gives me the best opportunity to podium. However, I wish that I was considered an all-around rider. Being a respectable climber with an engine for the flats and a powerful sprint would be ideal. Consider yourself lucky @frank. I am pack fodder in most Cat 3 crits. Those big boys can drill it. I got on the podium once last season due to a second to last lap crash that took out the leaders. Since crits are crashy, I may podium again...
Fuente was a classic grimpeur, but he would crack like a baby when Eddy pushed him. Long live the strongmen!
We call him 'Bruce' around here.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxTnLaH3gVA
Brilliant stuff, Frank; Kudos.
On top of the voodoo and wizardry governed by this force you so aptly describe, there's the additional mystery of 'the good leg day'. back in the 70's and early 80's, I rode lots of climbs in the company of two riders: one who was about my own size (1.90 m. and change, and around 80 kg at the time), and one short and sinewy lightweight who always, always streaked ahead on the climbs and left us in the dust...
... except one day, when I followed him all the way up an Alpine climb. I asked him later whether he felt he had been climbing much worse than usual, but he claimed that wasn't the case at all. For some odd reason, I had managed to don the gorilla suit that day. Never experienced this in quite the same way before or since. Felt good, though.
@Justin Vincent
Best example of this ever. Strong work.
Very nice Frank, but i have a confession to make; i've yet to test myself on a real mountain. The rolling hills of PA has been the most challenging climbs i've faced, not to degrade them, in the roads that surround the beautiful Amish built homes and sculpted farms hides the Man with the Hammer. And Its not for lack of desire i haven't done so yet, just lack of roads that point up. I'm forced to do hill repeats on bridges for training. On my to do list this summer is to drop the family at a camp site for a day, find a mountain i can't see the top of and just go. Any suggestions for the mid atlantic area?
@hudson
come over to Lancaster County and i'll help you find some pretty decent climbs, up to Turkey Hill from either direction is one of the better climbs, or we can Head to Welsh Mountain or Mt. Gretna, not real euro mountains, but all pretty challenging
Interesting comment from Luke Rowe in the context of a number of isolated large climbs vs a relentless onslaught of weather and terrain. We might not have many large mountains but our roads tend to go straight up what we have and we do have weather.
Oddly Box Hill has a reputation for being challenging but it's one of the few climbs that zig zags and there are at least 4 climbs in that vicinity that are far more difficult. Then again I guess that's just why Box Hill has it's reputation, most people can get up it without walking - and the view is pretty decent from the top.
Anyway see here for Luke Rowe's comment http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/the-uk-is-the-worlds-hardest-place-to-race-says-team-skys-luke-rowe/
I'm about 3 years from peaking right now, but when I managed to hit the road regularly people commented on how long this rouleur body could hang with the grimpeurs - and there was always the descent if they managed to get clear from me. My wife was always on me to drop some pounds to be good. I reminded her that that would require ignoring work and family. Of course, the bike does come first.
Now I'd just like to ride more often. Ah, life.