The Cyclist

The chiselled guns of a Cyclist

Being away from the bike is agony. Even for the day, while I’m at work, my mind swims about, thinking about my next ride. I worry that I won’t be home early enough to get the ride in that I’d planned – or worse yet – ride at all. I agonize over my decision not to ride in the morning, or to work, hoping one missed day doesn’t turn into two doesn’t turn into a week.

I wonder at which bike I’ll choose; I can visualize them hanging there, in the workshop, quietly waiting to be set free from their prison – a bike is only free when it’s being ridden. I imagine they discuss among themselves which is entitled to be ridden next; they might even place wagers on which will be the lucky one. I’m not sure with what bicycles might place wagers, perhaps a bit of grease for a creaking quick-release that I haven’t noticed yet.

All day, I evaluate how my body feels. Sitting folded up at a desk is a horrible place to judge one’s weight; I’ll lean against the desk’s edge and wonder if there was less of me touching it yesterday. I’ll feel the muscles in my thighs as I cross my legs in a conference room, and judge whether they feel stronger than the day before. Sometimes I’ll feel for the fibers in my muscles with my fingertips and then realize that the other people in the room with me probably find it odd that I’m rubbing my legs absentmindedly. To be fair, I find it odd that they don’t know what it feels like to be in shape.

It is a mystery whether I’ll be strong on the bike today or not. At the office, there is no way to know how I will feel; I won’t really know until I put in a real effort, which usually happens on the first climb of the day. Strength is a strange thing; the other day I felt blocked during my warmup but hit the top corner of the first climb so fast I almost lost my front wheel. Almost losing your front wheel in a corner on a climb is a special feeling.

Tim Krabbé wrote, “Non-riders. The emptiness of those lives shocks me.” Indeed; we are Cyclists, the rest of the world merely rides a bike.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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teocalli says:

Sep 3 2015 at 11:16 am

@SamV

.............feel hard to the touch in a relaxed position, you’ve got some self-care to attend to.

Sorry what were we talking about here?
Nate says:

Sep 3 2015 at 11:22 am

@il muro di manayunk

Even for the day, while I’m at work, my mind swims about, thinking about my next ride. I worry that I won’t be home early enough to get the ride in that I’d planned – or worse yet – ride at all.

Whoa. Are you me?

Seriously, there have been occasions where I have bolted out the office door so quickly to catch the early bus home so I can get a ride in that I’ve left my wallet/cell phone/keys sitting on my desk, only to realize it a minute after the bus has pulled away. Then the calculation quickly becomes “can I do without my wallet/cellphone/keys for a night or should I trade in 20 minutes of riding time to go back and get them?”

Haha. I almost always ride in the morning. Recently I had the chance to ride after work and I forgot my keys and sunnies in the office. It didnt cut short my ride, but I did have to race the dying light home at the end of the ride.
Nate says:

Sep 3 2015 at 11:25 am

@frank

@Francesco

Actually Krabbè regrets to “non-racers”, I remember because I’m “just” a rider.

I actually dispute the popular translation. In Dutch, he writes, “Niet-renners”. “Renner” is meant to be rider in this context, not necessarily a racer.

I had the same thought as @Francesco. That line has always bothered me; I am a non-racer rider and everything in the book except for that first line is spot on. I am relieved to learn about @frank's gloss of the original Dutch.
JCM says:

Sep 3 2015 at 12:45 pm

I don't speak Dutch but there's no reason that should stop me from asking questions about @frank's translation of Krabbe, right?

If Krabbe had intended to express shock at the lives of non-racers rather than non-riders, would he have used the term wielrenner rather than renner?

I had always imagined that Krabbe implied that to be a "rider", one must race. Of course, we all race in different ways, even if we're only racing to finish a favorite ride just a bit faster than we did the week before. Sometimes that sort of racing is enough.
Sam says:

Sep 3 2015 at 1:10 pm

Sounds like Frank is in a rut, would suggest some time on google maps looking for some place you've never been, or just ride and see where you go. Take your favorite bike on a date, have some beer, and maybe you both get a happy ending out of it.
frank says:

Sep 3 2015 at 1:49 pm

@JCM

I don’t speak Dutch but there’s no reason that should stop me from asking questions about @frank‘s translation of Krabbe, right?

If Krabbe had intended to express shock at the lives of non-racers rather than non-riders, would he have used the term wielrenner rather than renner?

"Renne"r is just short for "Wielrenner", just like rider is short for "bicycle rider". The omission doesn't mean anything by itself.

The art of translating is to infer what the author meant to convey and then convey that same sentiment using different words and grammar. This is my translation, and I feel very comfortable with that, especially having read the whole book in Dutch. But who knows. Tim probably isn't even really sure anymore, after so much time. The whole book is so spiritual about cycling as a way of life that I have a hard time imagining he'd make that distinction so brashly.

I had always imagined that Krabbe implied that to be a “rider”, one must race. Of course, we all race in different ways, even if we’re only racing to finish a favorite ride just a bit faster than we did the week before. Sometimes that sort of racing is enough.

It's certainly possible, but I never took that from his writing, which is to say you are correct in using the word "imagine"!
frank says:

Sep 3 2015 at 1:50 pm

@Sam

Sounds like Frank is in a rut, would suggest some time on google maps looking for some place you’ve never been, or just ride and see where you go. Take your favorite bike on a date, have some beer, and maybe you both get a happy ending out of it.

I leave for South Africa on Monday. With a bike.
JOE says:

Sep 3 2015 at 2:01 pm

Substitute booze for bike in around 50% of the instances in that Frank and you've got me in a nutshell. 3d Fitness. No point being able to scoot up the Alpe in under an hour without being able to stand the 8 pints at the top to celebrate....
Uncle V says:

Sep 3 2015 at 2:03 pm

Perfect predicament really it is as I too agonize over which bike to take ,which kit to don etc etc, I rarely miss a day and feel tired and sluggish when I do, but as soon the wheels are turning the predicament,s gone and bliss begins . Where on earth would we be without our dear two wheeled friends .
JCM says:

Sep 3 2015 at 3:10 pm

@frank

That clarification is actually very helpful. Much is lost when a book is read in a language other than the one in which it was written.

Along those lines, I'm curious to know how Krabbe's new book De Veertiende Etappe is. Maybe it will be translated into English at some point. I don't think I'm likely to learn Dutch anytime soon.