Two golden tickets to Hell

There was a time when bicycles were lovingly handmade by artisans who themselves loved the sport more than those for whom they built the machines. Lugs were filed to become Luggs; chain and seat stays were beautifully chromed for durability despite the grams it added to the frame’s final weight; spokes were chosen for their purpose and laced to hubs and rims in a pattern that suited the specific purpose the wheel was intended to serve. Throughout the process – from building the frame to manufacturing of the components – extra care was taken to make every element of the bicycle beautiful; these bicycles, when you are in their presence, radiate La Vie Velominatus.

As was customary at the time, components would be pantographed and frames repainted and rebranded, leaving behind little evidence of their origin. But hidden in the components and frames were symbols that the manufacturers stamped into their wares to preserve their identity; Colnago their Fiore, Cinelli their C, and Campa their Shield. These symbols have come to hold great meaning within the sport and we of a certain ilk scour the photos of our heroes’ bikes for evidence of their existence.

For a variety of reasons including cost, proprietary tube-shapes, and repeatability of production, these practices have largely died away in mainstream bicycle manufacturing; in fact, nearly every element in the art of bicycle building that requires attention and skill is slowing being eliminated from the craft. Ahead-set stems have replaced the need for a carefully adjusted headset and stem, sealed-bearing bottom brackets and hubs have eliminated the subtle touch required to hold a race in place with one hand while tightening the assembly with the other. By and large, the machines and riders are stronger than the terrain they race over, leaving little practical need for the attention to detail and customization that once came as a matter of course.

There is, however, one magical week of racing where the terrain is still stronger than the riders: the cobbled classics of de Ronde van Vlaanderen and Paris-Roubaix. This is the one week during which the Pros still require highly customized machines and we, as fans, can scour the photos of our heroes’ kit, looking for the symbols tucked away in the components to discern their origins. One such symbol is the brass badge affixed to the valve-hole on Ambrosio rims.

These rims are chosen by the Specialists for their strength on the stones regardless of what wheel sponsorship obligations might exist within the team. Their mystique is further deepened for those of us living in the States because they aren’t available here. It follows, then, that the Golden Ticket, as I call it, is something I’ve coveted for as long as I can remember (which, admittedly, isn’t very long and, upsettingly, keeps getting less long) but have never had a good enough reason to justify procuring from Europe. But Keepers Tour, Cobbled Classics 2012 provided the perfect justification to go about finding a set and I wasted no time in doing so. Upon arrival, the rims spent the better part of two weeks sitting in my living room or next to my bed, patiently waiting for me to pick them up and rub my thumb over the badge, just to reassure myself they were still there.

Not long after the rims arrived, I excitedly loaded a picture of Boonen in the 2010 Ronde and turned the laptop to show my VMH.

Frank: Hey, what do you see.

VMH: Boonen. Goddamn, he’s a stud. Don’t let me too close to him; I can’t be responsible for my actions.

Frank: What about his wheels.

VMH: What?

Frank: Don’t you see? He’s got my rims.

VMH: You can’t possibly know that.

Frank: Openly shows his exasperation by groaning audibly and rolling his eyes. Yes, I do. Check it. You can see the Golden Ticket on his back wheel. Its obvious as shit. What’s wrong with you?

VMH: Sighs, pours another glass of wine. Exits stage left. Hopefully not for good.

*Coincidentally, on the same day that this article was being written, Inrng published a similar (better) article on a related subject of hand-built wheels. Well worth the read: The Dying Art of Wheelbuilding

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • @eightzero

    Huge confession to make: I'd really like to be able to wheelbuild and do more things with my Machine, I am just terrified to go near it with a wrench and a book. For instance, I have a the most inperceptible clicking noise the comes from my drivetrain that probably emanates from my BB. It only manifests itself when climbing seated. It occurs at a specific point in the stroke regardless of gear, and is not related to left or right pedals. Meaning - I need to pull by crank and BB, maybe upgrade the BB while I have it apart, throw in some nipple lube (!) and reassemble.
    This scares the shit out of me. Yes, I have some tools. Yes, I have Lennard's Book. But Merckx help me, if I fuck up my bike doing this, I'll go jump off the Alpe. And no self-respecting Velominatus will sign up for some dumb-ass CycleU class with chicks in commuter gear learning to change a tube.
    Guess I need to HTFU. So I destroy a custom Ti frame. What could that cost?

    If only you knew someone who loved working on bikes and would be willing to show you how to do it in exchange for a few beers to be enjoyed during the exercise...Its all very easy stuff and you won't break anything, but it is deceptively difficult and its really great to have a Sensei helping out.

  • @jaja


    I was sufficiently moved by Frank's piece to take a photo the moment I got home. Apologies for tyre choice. Those wheels have done Ronde cyclosportive a few times with no issues. And my arse is much fatter than Frank's.

    Mate - I was just teasing, of course. Those Contis are GREAT tires, and those All-Weathers almost made their way onto Bike #3 when tires had to be replaced last weekend.

    I was only teasing because of course they should be tubbies and you should be riding a nice natural-colored side-wall.

  • @scaler911

    @j.king


    Oh look what I found...@Frank-They may be clinchers but they have never failed me yet and they have seen many kilometers of kasseien.

    "You gotta purty badge there son"....

    "Now squeal like an over-tightened hub".

  • @Chris
    It sure is, although I have a dim memory of there being some conflicting information between the three - suffice it to say, there are varying methods of lacing and building a wheel but you won't go wrong carefully following any of these methods. Lennard Zinn has a useful chapter on it in his "Art of Road Bike Maintenance" too.

  • @Chris

    @Nate

    @mblume

    While I am fully aware of Ambrosio's History in that part of the world, what are the views on the Zipp 303s that have tried to break with tradition and modernize and aerodynamicize these Classic races? Cancellara and others have had success on these- although more due to man than the Wheel. I would be scared to take my own 303s to such places- Ambrosios "” I would look forward to it.

    Right up there with taking the Kaapelmuur out of de Ronde.

    Ah missed this, earlier. Whilst it may not be in keeping with the tradition, how would carbon wheels hold up?

    I'm merely being opinionated. I have no idea how they hold up, but I'll note that Van Summeren won Roubaix on carbon wheels this year.

  • @frank

    @eightzero


    Huge confession to make: I'd really like to be able to wheelbuild and do more things with my Machine, I am just terrified to go near it with a wrench and a book. For instance, I have a the most inperceptible clicking noise the comes from my drivetrain that probably emanates from my BB. It only manifests itself when climbing seated. It occurs at a specific point in the stroke regardless of gear, and is not related to left or right pedals. Meaning - I need to pull by crank and BB, maybe upgrade the BB while I have it apart, throw in some nipple lube (!) and reassemble.This scares the shit out of me. Yes, I have some tools. Yes, I have Lennard's Book. But Merckx help me, if I fuck up my bike doing this, I'll go jump off the Alpe. And no self-respecting Velominatus will sign up for some dumb-ass CycleU class with chicks in commuter gear learning to change a tube.Guess I need to HTFU. So I destroy a custom Ti frame. What could that cost?

    If only you knew someone who loved working on bikes and would be willing to show you how to do it in exchange for a few beers to be enjoyed during the exercise...Its all very easy stuff and you won't break anything, but it is deceptively difficult and its really great to have a Sensei helping out.

    Ah...was I that obvious? eMail to follow when I get back in town next week. I promise to be a good PadoVVan....

  • @Chris
    I downloaded a pdf of the Bicycle Wheel from somewhere and just started reading it. I can send it to you or give you the link if I can figure out where I got it from.
    (Note to self: Buy Jobst a beer in lieu of royalties the next time we get together).

  • @mblume

    While I am fully aware of Ambrosio's History in that part of the world, what are the views on the Zipp 303s that have tried to break with tradition and modernize and aerodynamicize these Classic races? Cancellara and others have had success on these- although more due to man than the Wheel. I would be scared to take my own 303s to such places- Ambrosios "” I would look forward to it.

    From a purist's standpoint, I'm right there with @Nate's assessment, though if I was a Pro planning on going solo 20km from the line, I'd certainly take the 303's.

    They've severely redesigned the 303's and Mavic their Cosmics to be able to endure the stones; in fact, previous efforts ended in disaster, with a pair of 303's failing under big Maggie's massive weight, a CSC rider (name escapes me) crashing on the last sector on his way to a sure second-place, and I blame Hincapie's carbon wheels on snapping his steerer.

    Obviously, I'm in favor of the Amrosios.

    @mcsqueak
    +1

    @Bianchi Denti

    @scaler911

    @j.king

    Oh look what I found...@Frank-They may be clinchers but they have never failed me yet and they have seen many kilometers of kasseien.

    "You gotta purty badge there son"....

    "Now squeal like an over-tightened hub".

    This. Gold.

  • WOAH - that photo of Boonen is awesome! He just looks great riding a bike. Kit is perfect, fits just right, looks awesome, Guns are impressive...super cool. Crazy to me that he rides the cobbles without any gloves.

    Hey, since we are discussing tiny things, I've had this question for awhile and gotten different answers from different folks - do you lads set your saddle height the same on all of your bikes? What if you use different saddles? Do you measure to the rail or put something flat on top of it - center BB to rail could still result in a different extension with different saddles.

    And what about if you have different length cranks? I have 170s on one bike, 172.5 on most. Some have told me they use the same rail-to-BB distance, but this seems odd to me to not take into account the crank length discrepancy.

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