Update: On Monday, July 18th, this product has been demoted from Reverence status due to imprecise machining of the 3mm and 4mm allen wrenches. Please see the updated Reverence article for it’s worthy successor.
My apologies to anyone who has purchased this product based on this article. I am truly sorry.
Yours in Cycling,
Frank
—
In our pursuit of La Vie Velominatus, we embark on a sacred quest – the pursuit of Rule Holism. The path is strewn with apparent contradiction; these contradictions are in fact but tests laid out for us – oportunities to discover The Way and strengthen our resolve. Little by little, we find our way along the path.
Those of us who amputate our saddlebags in compliance with Rule #29, are immediately faced with the unavoidable realization that our tools are unwieldy, heavy, and bulky. Indeed, our reliance on the European Posterior Man Satchel has disconnected us from their contents and has bred complacency when it comes to tool selection. So long as the tool fits in the satchel, it goes in the satchel. Spoke wrenches, multi-tool with superfluous attachments, chain tools, zip ties, scissors, even the odd Crescent wrench has been known to find its way into the tool kit. For a Velominatus’ machine, which is kept in perfect working order at all times, these tools serve little function other than to make you climb less well for your weight.
Removing the dependence on a saddlebag demands that we become more discerning in the tools we carry with us. The tools that are to reside in our pockets must be as carefully selected for their function as our machines and our kit itself. Simple. Reliable. Lightweight. These tools will be called into action rarely, but when called upon, it will be at a time of greatest need. They must not fail.
Over the years, the tools that accompany me on my rides have reduced in number and weight, and we have developed a bond during the many hours we have spent together – me perched on my saddle, them tucked neatly in my pockets. I started with two Park tools, one with huge range of hex keys, and a second with a fewer (redundant) number of keys, but including the vital Phillips and flat-head screwdrivers. Eventually, I started leaving the multitool without the screwdrivers in the toolbox, and taking my chances with too few hex tools. The risk felt too great, so I switched to other tools with varying degrees of success, but each failed in one aspect or another – corrosion, weight, poor construction – and was added to ever-increasing pile of discarded tools.
The problem was further complicated when I switched to the Campy 10sp Skeleton Brakes with Torx T25 bolts. I cursed a blue-streak when, as I was mounting my new brakes with great anticipation, I realized I was to be stopped dead in my tracks as I didn’t have the proper Torx tool. I suppose, as Saul pointed out, I should be glad it was a standard Torx size and not some proprietary size that requires a $100 tool, but that knowledge did little to temper my rage. I purchased a set and returned home knowing full well that now my quest for the perfect minitool included a T25 to make emergency brake adjustments. More tools were chucked to the Island of Misfit Tools.
Almost without noticing, with the appearance of the Pro Minitool 11 in my stocking on Christmas morning my quest came to an end. The nickel-plated steel tools don’t rust, the alloy body is solid, the tool is thin and light enough not to cause any sag or discomfort in the jersey. Beautifully made, the tool folds smoothly and the 8mm hex snaps off to reveal a 6mm hex below it. Unlike most tools that attempt this feat, this one pulls it off with the addition of a ball lock. All the tools are cut precisely and cleanly cut, making it a pleasure to work with. Amazing.
It feels so good in the hand, it’s tempting not to carry it around and fiddle with it all day. But I don’t. Not anymore. Starting tomorrow.
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View Comments
@frank
Agree. No track stands at stop lights unles you can look Casually Deliberate whilst doing so. Which as far as I have seen is impossible.
@frank
Ok, point taken. Walking (when absolutely necessary) like a duck on crack it is. I think I was overly influenced by my mate Chris who went off for an mtb ride with a friend and ended up running though the bush for several hours hunting (successfully) a wild pig (his mate having brought along his rifle 'just in case'). While most of us might find this odd, Chris's only concern was that running after a wild pig in mtb shoes was not as comfortable as it might have been. Then again, when we go mtb'ng at night, Chris will sometimes dismount suddenly, scale a tree where he has spotted a possum, grab the possum by the tail and dispatch it from the world. (In NZ this is a Good Thing To Do - possums are not only Australian, they also destroy our native flora and fauna.) Given the negligible (I assume) likelihood of a Velominatus/a being distracted from his/her métier by either pig hunting or possum hunting, I acknowledge that my concerns over impractical (for walking / running / hunting) footwear are irrelevant. I unreservedly apologise and withdraw.
Don't withdraw bro! You have essentially highlighted "The Kiwi V" in that in NZ we go riding with a gun, in case we want to liven it up by bringing home some dinner for the whanau (family) as well as Merckxing the hell out of the ridiculously mountainous country we live in. Primaeval badassery.
@Zoncolan
Yes, I confess that dashing a possum's head against a sturdy kanuka tree is kinda satisfying, so I would not diss it as an occasional break from the mtb. But I don't think I'd want to charge through the bush in lycra (let alone the V-kit) after any animal, or be in any other way distracted from the Zen of the Road V by such entertainment, so I can live with waddling between bike and cafe.
@frank
@mcsqueak
Thanks to you both. Now I have another option to consider - Time, but as you both (and a few others) rightly point out, it would mean changing pedals on several bikes so that probably isn't going to happen.
@Mcsqueak
that sums up how I ended up with the Look's. First pedal purchase when changing over from toe clips (I'm getting old) was convinced by the LBS bloke to go with the Look's and still using the brand today.
Wasn't necessarily looking at a change, just curious.
@G'phant
You get possums, we get your dole bludgers.
For US/Euro veloms - NZ people are allowed to move to Australia and then get paid our version of "social security". Spending a few years on the dole in Australia is the NZ version of the US "European Summer Vacation".
However possums shit me too - and we can't kill 'em. Whats worse is that my resident possum does a lot more fornicating in my house than I do. And he lets me know about it.
@Zoncolan
@G'phant
On behalf of Australia "I'm sorry" for realeasing those possums into NZ...and Neighbours.
Your mate isn't Bear Gryll's understudy is he?
Was about to post the same thought. I'd prefer the bludgers to the possums. I think. (Do the bludgers get more action than you, too?)
Could be. Along with several hundred thousand others over here. I wonder what sort of bike Bear would ride ...