La Vie Velominatus: The Gifts of Rule #9

An early morning ride on Keepers Tour 2013. Photo: Brett Kennedy

We’re not really supposed to have favorites, but everyone does. Just ask your parents. So while I’m not supposed to have a favorite, I do, and its Rule #9.

Bad weather immediately separates the wheat from the chaff, and so the weekend warriors stay indoors and leave the roads to the devout. I talk most often about riding in the rain, with the drops of water dripping from my cap acting as my personal metronome as I carve a path through the chaos towards a happier self. But sunny days in the cold can provide their own glorious solitude.

On Keepers Tour 2013, we had unseasonably cold weather, and some of the best rides we had were early morning spins before heading off to the races. With the sun hanging low over the horizon, we rode through our frozen breath, together in close formation yet each of us retreating inward as we steeled ourselves against the cold. These were beautiful, peaceful rides.

This winter in Seattle has been relatively dry, but also cold. On the weekends, the country roads are nearly deserted and all that is left is the silent, still air and the burning of cold air as it enters my lungs. On a recent solo ride on Whidbey Island, I spun down the same roads which only a few months earlier I had ridden with friends on the annual Whidbey Island Cogal. The island seems a full place then, now it looked like an entirely different place – empty and beautiful.

There is something about the way the bike handles in the cold. The tires are firmer, the rubber less supple. The connection between bicycle and road seems simultaneously harsher and more fragile than in the warm. The muscles in my arms and hands are also more twitchy in the cold. Not twitchy like I can suddenly sprint; twitchy like I have difficulty controlling what they are doing – where normally I pride myself on holding a clean line, in the cold a small bump in the road might trigger a spasm that sends the bike into a wobble. Its an exciting way to ride.

Quiet roads, a still harbor, an early morning sunrise; these are the gifts reserved for those who ventured out when others stay in. These are the gifts of Rule #9.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • @Cajun Pseudo-Belgian

    Thanks for the great read Frank. Down here in Louisiana we get our fair share of the wet and some of the cold and lately a lot of both. I've been adding new armor to my cycling inventory to steel myself: rain jackets, embrocation and the like. I love riding out in the crap, it makes the beautiful, clear days even more special. Here in the deep, dirty south people don't like to drive in bad weather so my weekend rides in the wet can become a fortress of solitude or if I'm lucky I can share my pain with a few other souls. One of my best rides already was a 72 mile trek on New Years morning with three others into the mist while everyone else was hung over or indoors, Rule #9 was in full effect.

    Perfect.

    @JohnB

    Nice read, thanks Frank.

    Winter Rule #9 rides. I love the thought of them, I enjoy that part when the odd pedestrian and driver sees you heading out and just shakes their head and I love thinking about them afterwards. It's that bit in the middle when the hands are frozen and useless, I know in the shower my toes are going to feel like I'm shoving glass through the nails and I can hear the road salt eating my machine once I stop that I find myself asking why I always put myself through that. But I do. Now my body is conspiring to limit Rule #9 exposure, asthma frequently reacts badly to temperatures approaching 0 deg C and I need longer off the bike to recover from whatever mucus filled misery follows. Longer than I always end up doing.

    It's semi controlled experimentation, different kit, different layers, different durations and intensities. One day I'll find what works best. Until then its wrap up and ride on.

    VLVV

    Asthma-induced mucus-filled misery? I am lucky not to have the pneumonia version of  asthma that you appear to have yuck.

    I just bring my inhaler on those rides and it keeps the demons at bay.

    Those showers can be torture. Cold and 0C is one thing, add wet in there and you will be colder than an arctic monkey.

  • @Teocalli

    @titirangisi

    @pash

    @withoutanyhills

    Same method applies as a fall on a decent - You wipe yourself down, you get back on, and you start to see how fast you can ride until you fall again.

    To be fair to @withoutanyhills that's tougher to do with a broken hip, either that or is serious V

    I did try to get back on, honest. I only called for help after I had crawled from the middle of the road to the kerb, dragged my bike next to me, had a ten minute lie down and failed twice to stand up.

  • @klassman

    In high school physics, I learned about energy and heat and how even the "solids" in the world around me "” metal chairs, concrete floors, wooden tables "” had motion at the atomic level. On cold days, the motion slowed. On hot days, it would increase and things like tar on the road outside our country school would "melt" "” noticeable changes in (V)iscosity.

    I've long thought that the cold air not only holds the crowds inside and lends my rides quiet serenity, but it also slows down the motion "” motion in the guns, in the bike, the air being squeezed between tire and tarmac "” of everything to the extent that time itself slows. It is my theory; after all, Einstein loved to ride a bike too.

    And when Einstein was asked to prove he was right about this theories which were unprovable at the time, he just said something like, "I know I'm right, so you prove I'm wrong."

    I like that man's style.

    @titirangisi

    @pash

    @withoutanyhills

    Same method applies as a fall on a decent - You wipe yourself down, you get back on, and you start to see how fast you can ride until you fall again.

    That's the spirit mate.

  • The rub, of course, is just getting out in the weather. Like hopping in the Pacific Ocean (the PNW part anyway), you just have to suck it up and dive in. Then once you're numb, everything else becomes fun.

  • Is there the other extremefor Rule 9?

    Rolling up for a post work ride none else came for. A fast ride out along a well worn country road in deathly quiet, even the black cockatoos were in hiding. Warm air rolling over me drying the sweat before it dripped in my eyes. Freshly harvested wheat field to left and roght marked the turnaround.  One bidon down it was going to be tight getting back to town.

    A head wind, body temperature at least, no relief there and a second bidon down by halfway home. None of that easy acessible  water out here, not much that's hard to get either. Push on as the wind strengthens.

    Stop sweating with five kilometers to go. Feeling the V, no chance to surrender. Make it feeling wrecked.

    As I walk in the door the wife asks "what the hell are you doing? It's still 39.5c out there."

  • @El Cannon having trouble with posting links from my phone http://m.cyclingnews.com/news/when-is-it-too-cold-to-race-cyclo-cross

  • I generally can't ride in Rule 9 conditions because I live too far south. I'm thankful for this cold snap we're having in the U.S., as I do miss cold weather rides, though I don't miss four months of snow.

    I too enjoy the rain on the cap brim. I also especially enjoy the zip/unzip ritual - a bit hot, a few centimeters of exposed neck can cool you off. Once recalibrated, a zip up can restore order. I love the search for equilibrium and the satisfaction of choosing the perfect clothes for the conditions, where you feel great while riding, but if you stop for too long, you get cold. A small pleasure of seeking peace during a long solo ride.

  • @Roobar

    Is there the other extremefor Rule #9?

    Rolling up for a post work ride none else came for. A fast ride out along a well worn country road in deathly quiet, even the black cockatoos were in hiding. Warm air rolling over me drying the sweat before it dripped in my eyes. Freshly harvested wheat field to left and roght marked the turnaround. One bidon down it was going to be tight getting back to town.

    A head wind, body temperature at least, no relief there and a second bidon down by halfway home. None of that easy acessible water out here, not much that's hard to get either. Push on as the wind strengthens.

    Stop sweating with five kilometers to go. Feeling The V, no chance to surrender. Make it feeling wrecked.

    As I walk in the door the wife asks "what the hell are you doing? It's still 39.5c out there."

    Most definitely:

    Rule #9 . . . Those who ride in foul weather - be it cold, wet, or inordinately hot - are members of a special club of riders . . .

  • I'm new here (been reading for a while without posting any comments) so still learning the rules and not yet figured out my favourite. But I do enjoy riding in poor weather - I went out yesterday in the cold rain, and as I set off I muttered to myself, "there won't be many out today, only hard bastards!"

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