Strength can be a fickle thing this time of year, when the training isn’t as consistent as it should be; it comes and goes, sometimes several times in the span of a single ride or even a climb. Like a rosy-eyed dreamer I keep awakening as I train, thrown like a rag doll between a state nearing euphoria and one resembling purgatory.
My mind is what drives me as a Cyclist, it is what allows my to keep going despite the burning in my legs and lungs. It is what pushes me to leave the comfort of my home to climb aboard my bike when it is dark, cold, and rainy. But there are times when the legs won’t go or the body fails in some anomalous way when we are struck by the reality that we are but puppets, pushed and pulled by forces that exist outside outside the jurisdiction of our will.
Whether or not the body fails, the mind can still resist. It can resist easing back. It can resist turning around. It can resist turning the bars to steer away from the extra climbing loop. Giving in is the worst kind of weakness we have in Cycling. With time all the acute reasons why we want to quit will pass; the acid will flush from our muscles, the gasps for air will give way to steady breathing, the cold will leave our bodies. But quitting, and the doubt it cultivates can last much, much longer.
Quitting begets quitting. It wears down your confidence and makes you question yourself. It asks questions of you that you will struggle to answer when the 2am Ghosts of Lost Opportunities come calling. Worst of all, quitting gets easier the more you do it.
Before my rides, I will decide if it is to be a hard day or an easy day; whether I will do the extra loop with the big climbs or look for the flatter roads. Once on the ride, I will shut off the part of my mind that asks those questions and simply shut off the part of my mind that processes those considerations. I will not stop until I am done.
Our strength may be fickle, but our minds are steady.
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Funny the mind/body thing. One hot summer day my friend and I hooked up with some new 'acquaintances' for a ride on totally unfamiliar terrain. The road turned upward and I was suffering more than usual. So much so that my friend was quite concerned. As it turned out, I was very stressed out that day, and it was reflected in my performance. I pushed on, and slowly the road pushed the craziness out of my head. Before long, my legs were freed to spin at their usual pace. Best therapy there is.
I may still be youthful in my knowledge of being a cyclist, but I am keen on fighting the forces of quit. If quit were a person, he would be a supremely manipulative bastard. One you might find yourself in steadfast agreement with when staring over the edge of delirium, when you would otherwise flip that asshole a bird and pedal away. It is fighting the forces of quit that will build one's character. Your success in denying quit to take over your will is quite the organic performance enhancer.
@James
Wouldn't that be in violation of Rule #81
Frank, thanks. This is the inspiration one needs in the crux of February and promises that puxitony Phil the rodent may actually be right and a heck o the north may still prevail
'Quitting begets quitting'. That's poetic and deep. I take care of a lot of people in my work. Some with brain cancer, colorectal cancer and bone metastasis and the list goes on and on. Despite the best effort, some die and never easy. A few years ago I pasted the name of one who I cared for who really suffered but never quit on my stem. That was something I could look at when my head would drop, and i could remind myself of things, and that helped me not give up and appreciate the pain, after all, its really nothing in comparison
"exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope;..."
Romans 5:3
"To crush my enemies, have them run before me and hear the lamentation of their women." Conan the Barbarian
@souleur
Well said, makes my "Granpa" story on the fixed gear bike very insignificant. The people you care for are going through a whole other world of pain.
@unversio
That movie was a major inspiration for me as a young teenage cyclist. A story about a man and his bicycle. He dreamed of winning the Tour, had no upper body strength, weighed a scant 44.4521kg, was absolutely obsessed with his bicycle and, most importantly, he never quit.
It certainly happens at different times, in different ways.
A couple seasons ago I was doing a local weekly circuit race. It's a short loop, but you're either going fast downhill, in a park that has dogs, joggers and others unaware of your presence, or you're climbing. I went out wicked fast at the gun, and led the first few laps. About half of us blew the rest of the field apart, the pace went faster, and the pain came. Near the top of the climb, it pitches up just enough you have to decide wether or not it's a good idea to drop into the small ring. I'm 10m off the back, and just about to hang my head and just finish when I hear a spirited "get in there daddies". My then 5 year old gave me new vigor, I pushed myself back into the field, and while I didn't win, I finished with the front group (mostly consisting of dudes young enough to be my 'older' children).
So now, when I get the thought in my head that I could just "take another day off, it's fucking February FFS", I remember my son telling me to "get in there". All the motivation I need.