The Rules: Coming to the US May 5

The Rules endpapers

We recently lost our beloved Great Dane, Kirki, who we nicknamed Beene for reasons that elude logic. She was a good dog, more sweet than clever. A sad side effect of big dog breeds and their short lives is that it wasn’t until nearly the end of her life that she made certain key discoveries about the world. Such as that weighing nearly 65 kilos meant she didn’t necessarily need to be terrified of things like shadows and doorways. Nevertheless, throughout her life she somehow managed to skirt through challenges completely unscathed, utterly oblivious to her shortcomings. In an effort to immortalize her spirit, the VMH and I have taken to referring to situations where we succeed despite our breathtaking incompetence as being “All Beene”. For example, on the occasion that I skied over a cliff I had failed to notice, subsequently rode my tails through a stand of pine trees at unprecedented speed, and emerged the other end without so much as a hair out of place – that was All Beene.

You might say that Velominati itself is All Beene. We Keepers didn’t intend to become the stewards of class, style, and etiquette on the bike; we just mainlined the Word of the Prophet and the Apostles and jotted it all down. The rest just happened because of the Community who caught on to the fun we were having and joined in. Same goes for our writing; we’re just passionate about this stuff; we obsess about it all the time and want to share our love for the sport with others in the hopes they might identify or – better yet – catch the bug themselves. All the while, the truth is that we have no idea what we’re doing. English isn’t even my first language, for Merckx’s sake.

But the journey continues. The Rules: The Way of the Cycling Disciple was originally released in the Commonwealth on June 20, and surprised us with how well it was received despite various mistakes and errors throughout. In fact, it did well enough that some bright spark got the idea to release the book in our home US market as well, and we subsequently duped WW Norton into bearing that cross.

The Rules will be officially released in the United States on May 5th, 2014. We’ve put quite a lot of work into the US Edition with the following results:

  1. Greg LeMond, the only American Tour de France winner, graciously wrote the Foreword.
  2. We added four new Rules and supporting content, bringing the tally to 95.
  3. We revised some sections like the Prologue because we do what we want.
  4. We stayed sober during the editing process.
  5. We actually proofread it this time (also sober), so we are reasonably sure we got the mistakes out. (Many thanks to the scathing review on Amazon and its comprehensive listing of the errors in the book, it was a great convenience having all that work done for us and neatly catalogued in one place.)

There will also be several book events across the country which is part of the reason we are not doing a Keepers Tour this year due to the time constraints the book tour imposes. Each event will start with a group ride and conclude with a signing at a local bike shop. Events are planned for the Rapha stores in New York City and San Francisco, as well as one in Minneapolis, Boulder, Seattle, and Portland. Details forthcoming as the event schedules are confirmed.

From the bottom of our hearts, we’d like to thank everyone in our Community, those who bought (and didn’t burn) the book in the UK and Commonwealth, and everyone who comes by here every day to read our musings. This is all a lot of work, but it is work we gladly do because of each and every one of you and the fun you bring to what is Velominati.

Tune in during April as we’ll be publishing one new Rule per week in the lead-up to the book’s release. We have also added a landing page for both the US and UK editions of the book including information on where to buy; post insults and corrections on there.

All Beene.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • I have yet to see ANY errors in my UK copy. This is because I always read in it in a state of awe of joy,every single time. Fuck the pedants, it's further evidence they don't get it and never will. Buona fotyuna on the US launch.

  • Came to the path last season, just in time for the soon-to-be-coveted first edition and promptly bought a copy for myself and my boss (who is definite a cyclist) - Yay Canada! Now I shall have to purchase a second copy, because I definitely need to read what LeMan has to say about a bunch of guys who met on the Internet, shave their legs, and obsess over the fine details of being a cyclist.

  • @meursault

    I have yet to see ANY errors in my UK copy. This is because I always read in it in a state of awe of joy,every single time. Fuck the pedants, it's further evidence they don't get it and never will. Buona fotyuna on the US launch.

    Actually, we wound up doing 7 printings, and we caught the worst ones after the first one, so all the later printings kept getting better as we'd catch more and more.

    Fuck the pedants, it's further evidence they don't get it and never will.

    A-Merckx to that, brother. A lot of heart and soul goes into making these things, and mistakes are painful to see in a final work in a way someone who has only consumed and never created will never understand. But over time I've found that people who get it might be pedants but in a very Rule #42 kind of way; the dicks just don't get it and maybe they will later but for now I'm not bothered by folks who aren't laughing because they don't get the joke.

    Having my mistakes and shortcomings pointed out publicly has given me a thick skin, and for that I'm very grateful - it has taught me to be proud of my work for the sake of it and not let criticism diminish it too much.

    Anyway, cheers, and thanks for the kind words.

  • @frank Fuck em. It's so much easier to write a cheap critique of something than it is to actually go out and produce something amazing of your own.

    It's like reading the reviews for restaurants on TripAdvisor, the worst reviews are best ignored, they're written by narrow minded pessimistic little people who go out of their way to find fault.

  • @frank

    @Chris

    Funny observation: to this day, none of the Keepers have seen the book in a bookstore.

    Yeah but that's just cos you've only got one Commonwealth based keeper & NZ hasn't got around to printing on paper yet...they're still lugging around stone tablets & chisels.

  • @Mikael Liddy

    they're still lugging around stone tablets & chisels.

    I thought they used a cuneiform stylus and fresh sheep manure, subsequently baked in the sun.  Thanks for clearing that up.

  • @Nate

    @Mikael Liddy

    they're still lugging around stone tablets & chisels.

    I thought they used a cuneiform stylus and fresh sheep manure, subsequently baked in the sun. Thanks for clearing that up.

    Keep riding your bikes you blokes, your fishing skills lack luster .

  • Frank  condolences to you and the VMH, There are very few things that can match the unconditional love  of a pet.  N1 being another off the top of my head.   Looking forward to the  Book release.

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