As far as Cycling and racing iconography goes, Paris-Roubaix sits at the very zenith. It’s the most revered race among fans not only because of the pavé and the punishment it hands out, but there’s also the traditional finish of the race in the old velodrome, and what are possibly the most photographed showers anywhere in the world. Outsiders could never understand the significance of a shower and its importance in relation to a bike race.

It may seem ridiculous to some, but any visit to Roubaix and the velodrome usually includes a wander over the road to the old shower block, and if you’re really lucky, a cleansing soak under the holy water. On our first Keepers Tour we were allowed into the building but a no bathing policy was in place that day. I think the caretaker just wanted to get us in and out so he could return home with the wine for his children. The second occasion we were granted permission and I’ve never seen a bunch of blokes more enthusiastic to get naked and wash themselves in front of each other. And photograph it. Unfortunately on our last visit we were unable to even get access to the block, and a more disappointed crew I’ve rarely witnessed. We were on a high from a brutal day on the stones in the rain, we were filthy, tired and hungry, and there would have been no more perfect a scenario for a soaking.

Being the reverent types of people we Cyclists are, we look for ways to pay homage to our heroes and the scenes of their battles. Maybe you’ll name your cats Fausto and Gino, or your dog Eddy, or your first daughter Roger. Perhaps you’ll own a replica bike that one of your idols once rode, or your walls may display photographs or posters of races and racers long gone, or erect a shrine. Possibly, you’ll dream big and plan a replica Roubaix shower for your own home.

I’m dreaming big, and making it a reality. Long has there been talk between myself and my good mate @rigid, who also happens to be an accomplished architect, of a Roubaix shower in either his or my home. With a new house build coming up for me, we’ve been looking at the ways to incorporate the classic concrete stall and hanging shower head/chain arrangement, just like the real thing. Every non-Cyclist I mention it to needs a ten-minute explanation and photo gallery session, with stunned disbelief and incredulity the most common reactions. I’d probably have the same response if someone told me they were re-creating the tanning bed from Donald Trump’s place, so it’s understandable I suppose.

But the rest of us freaks are more like “fuck yeah”. Another friend of mine who’s a bathroom guy just can’t get his head around it, and is reluctant to build it for me not because of any perceived difficulty, but because he just doesn’t get it. Which is the whole appeal, because we are different, and we celebrate it. We live on the edges of society, shunned by motorists, laughed at by other sports, and it’s just the way we like it. And if there is any bizarre way to honour our sport’s icons, we will find a way to do it, no matter what anyone thinks. I’ll be in the shower.

 

 

Brett

Don't blame me

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  • @KogaLover

    Indeed they are

    The Velodrome part is on my Post Lottery Win House project list with approval of the VMW.  Along with a custom built bike room / workshop / den / gym / cave.

    Just need to sort the win......

     

  • I had the privilege of a hot shower in these hallowed cubicles after 167km Dunkerque Roubaix ride in April and it was incredible! I did not care that there was a female photographer lurking inside the door snapping away, after 176k in rain, hail and sleet she would have needed a rather large zoom lens to capture anything of mild interest. I had to change in Magnus Backstedt's stall though, Eddy's next door was occupied.

    The whole shower block was as basic as I had hoped, the water as powerful and hot as I had dreamed of all the way there.

    Yes, the VMH and others who I have told of this place just look at me as if I'm mental.

     

  • Brett, you gloriously mad bastard, do it!

    But it's got to be in the bit of the house that is devoted to the bike. You can't just get up in the morning, leave your jim jams in Eddy's stall and have a nice toasty shower. You've got to earn it. You need a dial by the door that asks how your legs were; unless you answer "strong" you'll be rewarded with a cold dribble that a pro would expect if he hasn't made the selection at Arenberg.

  • @ErikdR

    Ah-hahhaaah! Great idea. Brett. Classic, in the best and literal sense of he word.

    I’m an architect, and on top of that, have been steeped in Scandinavian minimalism and uber-esthetics for a couple of decades now. I could bore everybody silly with wise-sounding stuff like “less is more” and “form follows function” and whatever – and even whip you up some stark, white and stylish scheme of sorts, if need be.

    But as a cyclist, I am squarely in the “Fuck yeah!” camp, of course. Epic. Do it.

    I would argue that Roubaix showers very much follow "less is more" (no doors, no privacy etc) and "form follows function" (hot water that comes down in shedloads after swallowing belgian dung).

  • @KogaLover

    @ErikdR

    Ah-hahhaaah! Great idea. Brett. Classic, in the best and literal sense of he word.

    I’m an architect, and on top of that, have been steeped in Scandinavian minimalism and uber-esthetics for a couple of decades now. I could bore everybody silly with wise-sounding stuff like “less is more” and “form follows function” and whatever – and even whip you up some stark, white and stylish scheme of sorts, if need be.

    But as a cyclist, I am squarely in the “Fuck yeah!” camp, of course. Epic. Do it.

    I would argue that Roubaix showers very much follow “less is more” (no doors, no privacy etc) and “form follows function” (hot water that comes down in shedloads after swallowing belgian dung).

    Hmmm... I see your point. Still, I have a feeling that the minimalist-modernist crowd would frown at the fancy metal-link chains on the shower heads and (in particular) the brass name plates (Ornament! Blasphemy!).

    Also, true followers of Koolhaas and his ilk would probably argue that the rounded-off corners of the stall separators make them a bit too Victorian/old fashioned in their expression: According to some, proper modern architecture is something you should literally be able to cut yourself on.

    But then, I was/am mainly joking here - or attempting to. Still, there was a period in the late nineties and early 'naughts, when buildings simply couldn't get too pointy and 'sharp', both inside and out, according to some architects... The Vitra Fire station is a prime example.

  • @Teocalli

    @KogaLover

    Indeed they are

    The Velodrome part is on my Post Lottery Win House project list with approval of the VMW. Along with a custom built bike room / workshop / den / gym / cave.

    Just need to sort the win……

    Nice. But where are the shower heads in this image? Have they been dismantled at some point? Or are we looking at 'changing booths' here - with only the units toward the end wall being actual showers?

  • @JohnB

    I had the privilege of a hot shower in these hallowed cubicles after 167km Dunkerque Roubaix ride in April and it was incredible! I did not care that there was a female photographer lurking inside the door snapping away, after 176k in rain, hail and sleet she would have needed a rather large zoom lens to capture anything of mild interest. I had to change in Magnus Backstedt’s stall though, Eddy’s next door was occupied.

    Aha. Ignore previous post, please - it seems @JohnB had answered my question before I even got around to asking it. Changing stalls and shower stalls, then.

  • @ErikdR

    I was joking too! You are the architect after all, I am only a mere wannabe cyclist. Thanks for detecting the difference between change and shower stalls. Will @Brett be building both too?

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