Velominati Super Prestige: Tour de Suisse 2012

Andy Hampsten becomes the first North American to win a National Tour at the Tour de Suisse.

This is an exciting time of year. The Giro is in the books, the Tour is firmly in everyone’s sights, and those of us with the vaguest idea of how the big race will unfold are prognosticating the loudest as we use races that are proven to reveal fuck-all about what will happen at the Tour to predict what will happen at the Tour.

With the Dauphiné underway we look to the start of the Tour de Suisse to peer deeper into the murk to see who is riding well. As far as I’m concerned, I might as well lay out all the rider’s names in a random pattern and blow snot-rockets at the floor to make my picks this year because I honestly haven’t the foggiest idea who will take it; the biggest race of the year is spinning up to be the biggest enigma of the year.

All this babbling serves to demonstrate another important point, and the reason why the Dauphiné wasn’t in the VSP: these stage races are little more than preparation races for the big names, and a chance for the smaller one’s to take center stage. So why did the Tour de Suisse get a VSP while the Dauphiné didn’t? For starters, the latter feels less like a dress rehearsal for the Tour, but mostly its because there is a mountain pass that has cobbles all the way up it in Switzerland (though I’m not sure if they’re riding it this year). How cool is that? I can get on board with any country who values labor costs little enough to pave an entire mountain road one cobble at a time. Yes, we’re that scientific here in the Velominati Boardroom.

When this race is over, we’ll have even less of a clue as to who will win in July (well, everyone except @Marcus, who needs neither evidence nor results in order to be sure Cuddles will win) and we’ll be able to distract ourselves with the various National Championships which will take place in the week leading up the Tour’s start and guessing wether Bruyneel has the nerve to cut either or both Schlecks from his Tour team.

So, dust off your monkey’s bones and 12-sided die, time to make your predictions for the 2012 Tour de Suisse. Check the Tour de Suisse site for the latest route and roster info and remember that since this is a stage race, (not a Grand Tour), points on offer are 10 for first place, 8 for second, 7 for third, 5 for fourth, and 3 for fifth – all based on the final General Classification; plus two bonus points per rider in the top five regardless of the rider’s placing. Get your picks in by the time the countdown clock goes to zero, and pray for an intervention. Make sure you check the mappings of your picks before the race ends so you get the points you deserve, and use the dispute mechanism to alert us of any issues. Note that the dispute mechanism is the official means by which to raise concerns about your picks; questions about your mappings or disputes raised in the posts will be largely ignored.

Good luck.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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View Comments

Steampunk says:

Jun 18 2012 at 5:02 am

@ChrisO

He impressed me during the Giro, always hanging with the main group on the main rides, but he was never able to make up the deficit from the TTT and the ITTs, where he lost some time. At 28, I thought this might be his breakthrough year. But you're right: a bit more support and he could be a real contender.
The Oracle says:

Jun 18 2012 at 6:13 am

New lexi entry: Frankenschleck. Because, apparently, someone has brought him back from the dead.
LA Dave says:

Jun 18 2012 at 7:24 am

Anybody notice Frank Schlecks interview regarding the Tour? Here is part of his reasoning for not wanting to be named captain of the RS tour team:

In addition, "I don't want to be named as the leader, because if I put in a disappointing performance, then everyone can afterwards complain that I was not good enough. "

He really needs to have rule 5 tattooed on the inside of his eyelids. Here's the link if you care to read more:

http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/schleck-doesnt-want-captains-role-at-tour-de-france

So who is their captain then? Klody? Change their mind and let Horner race?
Tartan1749 says:

Jun 18 2012 at 7:42 am

@LA Dave That team is an absolute mess. The only ones who have a pair are Faboo and Jens, and Fabian gets limited support in his classics endeavors. Jens is Jens, but a bit past his prime (and no, I wouldn't tell him that). The Schlecks have no sense of drive. My oh my.
Oli says:

Jun 18 2012 at 1:07 pm

@LA Dave Yep, they're letting Horner race after all.
Nate says:

Jun 18 2012 at 1:50 pm

@LA Dave

It's probably realistic that Frank can't hold his form through the Tour. He should be stagehunting, they can send Spartacus after yellow in the first week, and it can be a farewell tour for the old dudes. That's about the limit of what they might be able to accomplish.