Training with the Pros

Ryan Kelly on the 200 on 100 photo: Chandler Delinks

Training with the Pros, it sounds like fun but it can’t be. Pros are genetic freaks; they put more kilometers on their bikes than any of us civilians do on our cars each year, they ride around whole countries at an average speed greater than 40km/hour and they can dish out such Rule V style day-after-day-after-day. We all dream about it but we don’t have it.

In an earlier life I came close to landing my dream job in Monaco with the IAEA. Serious people counseled me not to take the job, they said it was a bad career move. How could I explain to them I didn’t give a shiet if it was a bad career move, the chance to live, and more importantly to be a cyclist near San Remo and La Madone was all I cared about?  Yet I knew if I even saw Tom Boonen or one of the many Aussies who call Monaco their home out on a training ride, I would only be seeing their lycra-clad asses disappearing up the road. Could I at least catch up to Stuart O’Grady to chat him up for a minute before my inability to talk and breathe would force me to lie and say I was turning right HERE?  Maybe I could drink beers with the Aussies, I could keep that professional pace, actually no, I would get dropped there too.

Oh that job fell through and my dreams of  commuting into work on Merlin on the Cote d’Azure disappeared like those watery mirages on a hot highway, but I digress. I have some good and funny direct video evidence why training with the Pros would be a cruel lesson in our mortal failings. One such Pro is Ted King, an American racer living the dream; he is based in Lucca, riding for Liquigas, riding in support of Ivan Basso and Peter Sagan. He is tough, he has finished every Giro d’Italia he has started. He broke his collarbone this summer racing in Philadelphia when his front wheel dropped into an inexcusably lame drain grate (thank you very much, oh third-world infrastructure that defines the USA).

To bring his training back up to speed he did the 200 on 100 with fellow Pro Tim Johnson and amateur racer Ryan Kelly. The 200 on 100 means 200 miles on Route 100, riding North to South from the top to the bottom of the state of Vermont, the Green Mountain State. Unless you are Marcus, 333 km seems like an impossibly long ride to do at once, I would be in broom wagon long before the end of such madness.

And by madness I refer to the 338 km at 34.1 km/hr average speed with 3,197 meters of climbing thrown in for good measure.

[vimeo width=”620″]http://vimeo.com/27367910[/vimeo]

Video credit to Chandler Delinks

 

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270 Replies to “Training with the Pros”

  1. That video is hysterical… and I feel for the poor guy with the beard: “it’s like being hit by a whole dumptruck full of AWESOME… only way to convey how great it is, but how wasted I feel” Brilliant.

  2. Ryan has a quite funny blog btw, his commuting and CX tales are worth the read, including some top quality heckling at a CX race.

  3. @Steampunk
    Given the Cogal aftermath we should send @Cyclops on a mission like this to see if the pros can make him stop smiling. I doubt it.

  4. @roadslave
    I was forwarding this to a few people as I also found it very funny then I figured it deserved a wider audience. His 1000 meter stare towards the end kills me. We have all had it usually with a lot less kilometers. I read that Ryan had just done a 333 km ride a few days earlier and asked to join this one. Ouch. Some people are built for distance, some not so much, me.

  5. Vermont is truly an awesome state for cycling (I would know, I grew up 15 minutes from Bennington). I’ve watched this video many a time and it looks like fun yet agony at the same time. Dump truck of awesome for sure.

    Ted King is one of my favorite pros. He seems like a blast to be around. When I saw him warming up for the GP Montreal I said quite loudly “hey its Ted King!” He turned to me and casually but deliberately said to me “In the flesh.” I’m upset my work prevented me from riding with him during his charity ride this year.

  6. FUCK Yeah! 7th Generation Vermonter here (currently displaced by the Army) who goes back every summer for vacation. NOW I have something to dream about doing on a summer trip. How cool is that? Awesome thread and post. Totally inspiring and funny as hell to boot.

    Who wants to ride that sucker next summer? I own a decent camp/house right on Lake Champlain in North Ferrisburg, VT that we can all crash at before and after the event as well.

  7. @Gianni I hear you, and I’m grateful to you for sharing… thousand yard stare absolutely covers it… sets the bar for how much suffering one can put oneself though. Chapeau to him, and to you

  8. @Buck Rogers

    If the thing was well planned and I felt I could actually finish something that nuts, then yeah I would be game. Maybe we could turn it into the Northeast Cogal for next summer. The location would be pretty central, not far from the mid-Atlantic or Canadian Velominatus.

  9. @King Clydesdale, @Buck Rogers

    Who wants to ride that sucker next summer?

    Whew…I’m thankfully 6 time zones away. But do it and video it. Be sure to have a support truck with the side camper window blown out for easy wheel access. And lots of marshmalo fluff.

  10. @Gianni
    Nice one Gianni – happened upon that vid a way back and what struck me at the time was that whilst that Ryan fella looked completely fucked, he still seemed to be pedalling ok.

    As for you so graciously mentioning our ride in a story about that one, well I think our average speed was closer to theirs than to zero, but that is about where similarities end.

  11. @Marcus, @Zoncolan

    I just found a little more background on Mr R. Kelly, he is a cat 2 road racer, so he is no slouch, and he commutes 70km a day on bike, all year, in New Hampshire. Damn.

    Marcus, they didn’t nearly drink as much beer as you did though.

  12. Why do they speak in miles, this unit makes no sense to me.

  13. @Steampunk

    On top of the social Cogals, something like this would make a great annual Velominati challenge. Sign me up!

    This. I’d show up.

    Two things: One. Stop bitching about rain and then talking about Dump Trucks of Awesome. They are the same thing. Two. Shave off that beard and you wouldn’t be so wrecked after that measly little ride.

  14. @Nate

    @Steampunk
    Given the Cogal aftermath we should send @Cyclops on a mission like this to see if the pros can make him stop smiling. I doubt it.

    Yeah, never happen. He really does smile like that, the faster you go. Until he pops. Then the reverse effects of the Theory of Relativity set in and Space/Time curve around him to make it look like he’s climbing even slower than he is.

  15. @Sean from the great white north

    Why do they speak in miles, this unit makes no sense to me.

    I love it; Ted does the most bizzarro calculation to go from Kms to miles for the cameraman; 100 plus 45 plus 15 minus a goat plus a quick release, so that’s 75 miles.

  16. @King Clydesdale

    @Buck Rogers
    If the thing was well planned and I felt I could actually finish something that nuts, then yeah I would be game. Maybe we could turn it into the Northeast Cogal for next summer. The location would be pretty central, not far from the mid-Atlantic or Canadian Velominatus.

    Let me think about this one. I’m pretty psyched about it right now. Give me something to look forward to and train for over the winter months.

    Not to be too lame, but we could always think about doing the upper 166k’s this summer, the lower 166k’s the following summer and then the whole bloody thing in summer 2014. Or, let’s just HTFU and kill ourselves next summer and see how far we can make it!

    Feel free to guess which I want (but this is coming from a guy who ran a 50 mile running ultra on a dare when I had not run for over three months–finished in 9 hours and 20 minutes but was FUCKING CRIPPLED for a week)!

    I’m really up for this one and will take the lead if anyone is interested (and my camp is still up for a crashing site as well).

  17. @Buck Rogers
    Sorry, my last point was about how much of a fuckin’ idiot I can be when challenged, not about any self-implied badassness (which should go without saying as it was running after all)!

  18. @Buck Rogers
    No. If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it all. I’m all for social Cogals and getting to meet the good people on this site for friendly rides. But once a year, we need to create a real mettle tester. If we’re going to do this, I want to die on the bike, not roll in for a pint after 100k of chatter.

  19. @Steampunk

    @Buck Rogers
    No. If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it all. I’m all for social Cogals and getting to meet the good people on this site for friendly rides. But once a year, we need to create a real mettle tester. If we’re going to do this, I want to die on the bike, not roll in for a pint after 100k of chatter.

    FUCKIN’ WORTHY response!!! I’m in. Next June I’ll be in VT. L et me know what weekend works for you all.

  20. Well Buck, if you want to take the lead I’ll be glad to help. Just need plenty of heads up for work is all, but if we plan for next summer that will be no problem I’m sure.

    http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/55594514 – For anyone interested in the routes, ~3300 meters in elevation gain over 340 kilometers.

    This would take a bit of training on my part Buck, the longest ride I’ve ever done is a century, and it didn’t have that much climbing. We’ll have to see about what everyone wants, and how many people would show.

    But I’m totally game for riding the bike with some of you, and spending time in New England.

  21. His voice had the sound of fulfilling every inner most desire at the very end – “Ah, chocolate milk”. Hilarious. Beaten down to the basic cravings.

  22. @Steampunk

    @Buck Rogers
    No. If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it all. I’m all for social Cogals and getting to meet the good people on this site for friendly rides. But once a year, we need to create a real mettle tester. If we’re going to do this, I want to die on the bike, not roll in for a pint after 100k of chatter.

    This. Is. Why. We. Keep. You. Around. Was about to say the same thing – and feel the same way about Liege. Half measures, friendliness, and mentorship are awesome and a great theme for Cogals. But some things are best dealt with through extensive applications of Rule #5 through the reduction of people who think they’re good cyclists into something resembling a single-celled organism.

    As my dad said to me this weekend, “I haven’t had time for long rides this summer. The most I got in was 7 or 8 hours.”

    That, my fellow Velominati, is the order of magnitude we should be measuring ourselves by.

  23. @Marcus

    @Buck Rogers
    My mind boggles at what you must have stolen to have forced you to run 50 miles because RUNNING IS FOR CRIMINALS

    Yes, thank you. Per Rule #42: One should only swim in order to prevent drowning, and should only run if being chased. And even then, one should only run fast enough to prevent capture.

  24. @itburns

    His voice had the sound of fulfilling every inner most desire at the very end – “Ah, chocolate milk”. Hilarious. Beaten down to the basic cravings.

    Every movie I ever make will end with this line. Sorry. I’m that shameless.

  25. And do we try to get the same average speed as the pro ? cause 45kph on the flats with some decent rider in a single file surely can be done.

  26. @frank

    But some things are best dealt with through extensive applications of Rule #5 through the reduction of people who think they’re good cyclists into something resembling a single-celled organism.

    Liege or 200(333) on 100 should take care of that. I’d need a bidon of pot-belge, one of Faboo’s old cycling socks soaked in ether and some cat adrenal extract to even start either of those rides.

  27. @Godsight

    And do we try to get the same average speed as the pro ? cause 45kph on the flats with some decent rider in a single file surely can be done.

    How flat do you think Vermont is?

  28. Late to this awesome post and I haven’t had time to watch the vid but I am in! June will be early for me because late winter postprandial eating habits are still being dealt with and my climbing weight is still a month from ideal… So if August works that would be my vote.

    If not, hey, I will use it as training and thank Merckx for the kick in the pants. June may be better because it will be light until well past 9 pm so that would mean aprox. 15 hours of daylight – time enough to finish with an early start!

  29. @Gianni
    Fuckin awesome article and video. Disclaimer: I’m not trying to come off ‘rad’ here. One of the best rides I ever did, was the Bridge of the Gods loop, twice, in one day. For those not familiar, it’s 134K per lap, with 1250+M of elevation gain. I finished the two laps in 10hrs. I was raising money for a friend with cancer and got people to pay me by the mile for how far they thought I could ride in 10hrs.
    Point being, give me some notice, and I’d be down with a long fucker like that. Sounds fun!

    The BOG loop: http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/7091916

  30. @Gianni
    That fast for that long, and after awhile you start to see Elvis (that happened to me during STP in one day, at about mile (sorry) 170.

  31. Sadly, Mr. Kelly’s best work, his race report from the Tour of HIlltowns from a couple years back, was lost to a server issue. Perhaps one of the best things I’ve read on the Internet. Or at least that’s how I remember it.

  32. That’s absolutely fantastic. Poor, poor dude…Inhuman!

    I did a 175k ride a month or so back at similar (read slower) pace and was a weeping, floppy legged schoolgirl at the end.

    Did manage half a night out on the beers and a kebab afterwards though…

  33. Legendary

    It’s always humbling watching a fellow human disintegrate before our eyes

    @scaler911
    Vawesome fundraising effort – bet they loved you when they found out how stubbornly determined you were!!

  34. @frank

    Half measures, friendliness, and mentorship are awesome and a great theme for Cogals. But some things are best dealt with through extensive applications of Rule #5 through the reduction of people who think they’re good cyclists into something resembling a single-celled organism.
    As my dad said to me this weekend, “I haven’t had time for long rides this summer. The most I got in was 7 or 8 hours.”
    That, my fellow Velominati, is the order of magnitude we should be measuring ourselves by.

    hear hear – what an awesome dude your Dad is – I reckon there is no reason we shouldn’t all ride until our deaths in our late 90’s – therefore, every good reason to practice dying on our bikes in the interim

  35. Shall come to review this video in a couple of weeks time when I take on what will be my first “proper” century. 100k organised ride that starts at least 10k’s away (there’s my warm up) and finished about 55k’s (and one solid set of hills) away from home.

    Will easily be my longest ride so far & a little research has shown that over the past 4 years the lowest temp has been 34c. If I survive I shall provide a report.

  36. Nice piece Gianni. I wonder who the fourth rider was who came and went so fast. And Ted King, similarly to Floyd Landis, has the face of a chubby kid but rides like a stud.

    I love the question at the end. Had I seen this video before I would have asked Cyclops the same thing last weekend.

  37. Ryan alluded to this as well in the video but it needs to be said that long rides like that are not that difficult if you don’t kill the pace. Once you start driving the pace up over 35kph (at least for me) for longer than the average evening group ride (2-3 hours) is when the trouble begins.

  38. @Godsight

    @Buck RogersI am in seriously, i am in quebec city so vermont is like a 3 hours car ride max.

    Done! This is going to happen next June. At least, I am going to ride it next June and will be happy to try to put something together with King Clydesdale to get this set up for anyone else that wants to join in.

    My longest ride this year was 177 km’s with 6.2 k feet of elevation gain. Rode it solo in 6 hours.

    I imagine this ride taking me well over 12 hours next summer. While the daylight will be with us at that time of year, still will want to be rolling no later than 0600, maybe even 0530.

    Logistics will be interesting as we meet at one point (Canada) and end at another (Mass). Have to see about getting a van and some sympathetic drivers to help out that day (I might know a few suckers who’d be willing to help out a bit).

    I have a wedding that I have to go to on the 16th so will be in VT prior to that. Also heading to France sometime after the wedding for two weeks. I’m taking four weeks of vacation that month. For me, the 9th or 10th would probably be best, but maybe even a weekday would work better, but not sure about everyone else’s schedule.

    Let me know what you all think and start training if you’re coming, this is going to be EPIC, BABY!

  39. Early June it is! I guess I will have less of a lay off over the winter now! I am 3 hours away south in NY so a buddy and I could come in 2 vehicles and leave one (a truck) south to take a bunch of bikes back up north…

    I did 200+ km (3,000+ meters) in August and the ride time was 7.5 hrs but overall with stops/mechanical/flats it was 9+ hrs. So 12 hrs seems doable with some Rule #5 thrown in. My vote is early start that way if all goes to plan there will be more light for liquid recovery time.

    I wonder what traffic on Rte 100 is like weekend (Sunday, quieter?) vs week day. Do we have any Velominatus local to the area who could give a report?

    This will be epic and with some good weather and a good group could be the ride to remember. Otherwise I am not even going to think about it!

  40. @All Also anyone who is interested can enter the UCI Golden Bike World Series event here in the UK. I am pretty sure the tickets sold out in 24 hours this year. It goes without saying that Velominati entrants will be wanting to look at the Grand Fondo route of 206km. Wiggle Dragonride UCI Golden Bike

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