The Bikes

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The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.

It seems in some ways like a kind of Stockholm Syndrome, the way we honor our machines. We love them to a point that lies well beyond obsession. Upon these machines upon we endure endless suffering, but also find an unending pleasure. The rhythm, the harmony between rider and machine, the outdoors, the wind in our faces and air in our lungs.

The Bikes is devoted entirely to our machines. Ours, The Keepers, and yours, the Community. It features articles devoted to our bikes, and proves a forum for uploading photos of your own machines for discussion. We will be harsh, but fair; this is a place to enforce and enhance our observation of The Rules.

If you’d like to submit an article about your own beloved bike, please feel free to send it to us and we’ll do our best to work with you to include it.

  • Rule #12 and the Cascade Effect That is a very reasonable opening salvo for the Rule about bike ownership. Three is good and certainly a minimum, and we are talking road bikes here, if there was any doubt. They naturally become ordered: the #1 is ichi-ban, top dog, go-to bike for every and all rides. #2 was the old #1, it ...
  • Guest Article: Black Is Not The New Black  @kogalover is singing my song here. Bikes are beautiful. ’nuff said. VLVV, Gianni With all those posts on riding in winter and being visible, either by putting Eyes of Sauron or other car melting devices on one’s steed, or by even considering a YJA instead of donning plain black kit, it was about time to finally get ...
  • Dialing in the Stable This was going to be an article about Rule #45. It is amazing how much time is wasted and matches burned when professionals stop for that second bike change to get back on their #1. With all the jigs available to team mechanics it would seem they could set up five bikes exactly the same. And ...
  • Matching the drapes to the rug As a longtime titanium bike owner, I’ve always been jealous of a beautiful painted frame but Ti and carbon frames don’t need paint like a steel frame needs paint. But I want some painted beauty. It’s like buying a white car; I can’t do white, need some color. So between a Ti frame and a ...
  • Festum Prophetae: Waiting for the Hour Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth. – Mike Tyson The one thing everyone should always plan for is that however well-conceived a program might be, things will never go to plan. The high level plan for my Festum Prophetae Hour Ride was as follows: Have a custom Hour Bike built by Don Walker. Because reasons. Reasons like custom ...
  1. @ChrisO

    @Bespoke

    @Bespoke

    I’m digging deeper and finding a bit more information in the Keepers section (where these posts should likely be).

    In the meantime, greetings to all stalwarts.

    0

    Yes it’s a bit like writing The Causes of WW1… Franz Ferdinand was only the final straw.

    In no particular order – obviously this is what was seen from a public-facing point of view, and there may well be other elements:

    • Lots of issues with the last kit order, which was a couple of years ago. Much annoyance leading to anger at kit that was paid for but never delivered. Eventually excuses gave way to silence.
    • The flow of content began to dry up, seemingly coinciding with the demands of books and other gigs for Frank. By the time the Hardmen book came out it had pretty much stopped.
    • At the same time the other Keepers started to be at more distance. Guest articles and other contributions went quiet. It later transpired there had been fallout with issues over royalties and non-responsiveness.
    • Various attempts, public and private, were made to intervene with people offering to help, take on roles and try to outsource the community aspects of the site but AFAIK there were no responses.

    Apart from (I think) one post there’s been radio silence from Frank. The articles are just on a random carousel selection.

    I get that people don’t want to do something forever which is why it was disappointing not to take the chance to let it evolve into something else. I’m afraid it rather makes all the stuff about community and La Vie Velominati or whatever it was look like bullshit, but hey ho… sic transit gloria mundi.

    0

    Thanks for the post. I’ve certainly contributed a few articles to the site (always through the kind and gracious Gianni) and even sent a few more to Frank (ignored), but the site has evolved into a few diehards who won’t let this thing (community) die. It started off great as a forum for bike geeks, but once money got involved, that’s when things got messy (as they often do).




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  2. @Steve Trice

    Talking about the community, is anybody else getting frequent friend requests from “12”? Seems an odd thing, “12” has never posted (not under that name, at least) but has sent me several requests. Can’t decide whether it’s a scam, a bot or somebody who is a bit needy.

    0

    Yep I think they’re selling nipple lube, but the wrong sort…




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  3. @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.




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  4. @Bespoke

    @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.

    0

    You’re not alone in this. I can trace my entire life as a Cyclist through this site. From buying my first road bike, to learning how to kit up properly, to my first time trials, then bunch races, my first race win, my first 100km, 150km, 200km ride, my first big rides abroad and also going from taking half a day to change an inner tube to building my own bike from the frameset up. Witness:

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.




    1
  5. @RobSandy

    @Bespoke

    @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.

    0

    You’re not alone in this. I can trace my entire life as a Cyclist through this site. From buying my first road bike, to learning how to kit up properly, to my first time trials, then bunch races, my first race win, my first 100km, 150km, 200km ride, my first big rides abroad and also going from taking half a day to change an inner tube to building my own bike from the frameset up. Witness:

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.

    1

    Quite a transition !

    Just number-pinning to go then ;-)




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  6. @RobSandy

    Same transition with me although I do not have the evidence in pics nor do i so races but i stacked up on bikes since landing here, changed kit, overcame the first shincuts and love the altitudemeters. You still need a second bidon btw.




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  7. @ChrisO

    Everyone, my wife included, tells me I’m terrible at pinning numbers on. TBH I care more about access to the pockets.

    @KogaLover

    @RobSandy

    You still need a second bidon btw.

    Whut? Why?



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  8. @KogaLover

    You still need a second bidon btw.

    0

    Actually, Rule #78 states I need one less cage, not one more bidon…




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  9. Giro Picks

    Froome

    Dumoulin

    Miguel Angel Lopez

    Pinot

    Aru




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  10. @RobSandy

    @Bespoke

    @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.

    0

    You’re not alone in this. I can trace my entire life as a Cyclist through this site. From buying my first road bike, to learning how to kit up properly, to my first time trials, then bunch races, my first race win, my first 100km, 150km, 200km ride, my first big rides abroad and also going from taking half a day to change an inner tube to building my own bike from the frameset up. Witness:

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.

    1

    Chapeau Bro!




    0
  11. @sthilzy

    @RobSandy

    @Bespoke

    @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.

    0

    You’re not alone in this. I can trace my entire life as a Cyclist through this site. From buying my first road bike, to learning how to kit up properly, to my first time trials, then bunch races, my first race win, my first 100km, 150km, 200km ride, my first big rides abroad and also going from taking half a day to change an inner tube to building my own bike from the frameset up. Witness:

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.

    1

    Chapeau Bro!

    0

    Chapeau indeed. Looking great in that 2nd pic. You’d be quite justified in feeling pretty damn chuffed with yourself.




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  12. I think you guys will love this. Sorry if it’s been posted elsewhere.




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  13. @RobSandy

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.

    Two words … Photo … Shop … :-)




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  14. Me at Flèche Buffoon last Saturday. F*ing hardest ride I’ve ever done. Essentially a half version of Liege-Bastogne-Liege. 75 miles. 14 Belgian Ardennes-like climbs. Shortest about a kilometer and the longest more than 2 kilometers. Steep, steep, steep. Even on climbs with single digit average grade, significant sections that are mid-teen double digit. Steepest climb is Uhlerstown, which is 11 percent average grade. But that’s deceiving because that includes a shallow run-in (the only climb with one, the rest are immediate left, right, or 180 then just up) and leveling off at the top. The steep section (it’s own segment on Strava) averages 23 percent! The steepest bits are … wait for it … 40-50 percent! My lowest gear was 36×28. I barely made it up. If we do it again next year (yes, we’re already talking about it), I’m putting on a 34×30 lowest gear.




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  15. @chuckp

    Chapeau – I was glad of my 30 on RVV. Worth every penny.




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  16. @Bespoke

    I think you guys will love this. Sorry if it’s been posted elsewhere.

    0

    I’ll go with both. Rode against Graeme many times in the 80s. Fast as hell as as nice a guy as you could meet. Still looks absurdly fit.

    He should be on the inspirational speaker circuit, or teaching classes in creative thinking.




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  17. @Bespoke

    I think you guys will love this. Sorry if it’s been posted elsewhere.

    0

    STUD




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  18. @RobSandy

    @Bespoke

    @ChrisO

    Hi ChrisO,

    Thanks for your response, good to hear from you. As someone coming to this sport/culture, late in life, I learned a lot from this community so glad to know some semblance still exists and that the discussion continues.

    0

    You’re not alone in this. I can trace my entire life as a Cyclist through this site. From buying my first road bike, to learning how to kit up properly, to my first time trials, then bunch races, my first race win, my first 100km, 150km, 200km ride, my first big rides abroad and also going from taking half a day to change an inner tube to building my own bike from the frameset up. Witness:

    Me cycling at the velodrome in early 2014 – note general fatness, trainers, baggy clothing and hairy legs.

    Me racing an E123 crit last week, getting in the winning break and generally just about holding my own with the big boys on a bike I built.

    Thank you Velominati.




    1

    really super stuff!




    0
  19. @wiscot

    So cool that you rode with him. You’re so right: he looks amazingly fit and he is a real character; very funny: “air molecules come in bunches”!

    Interesting comment re: speaking about creativity and problem solving. You are spot on.




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  20. @Bespoke

    @wiscot

    So cool that you rode with him. You’re so right: he looks amazingly fit and he is a real character; very funny: “air molecules come in bunches”!

    Interesting comment re: speaking about creativity and problem solving. You are spot on.

    0

    Yeah, whenever I see/hear Graeme, I think “Christ, he should be doing TED talks.” The enthusiasm, creativity, out-of-the-box thinking.” You can’t teach that stuff.




    0
  21. I played tourist over the weekend.




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  22. @chuckp

    Nice – but Rule #26……..big dog and photo from the drive side!




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  23. @RobSandy

    Indeed, either remove cage or put same bidon in it.




    0
  24. @KogaLover

    @RobSandy

    Indeed, either remove cage or put same bidon in it.

    0

    I don’t think there’s anything in the rules about empty bottle cages – correct me if I’m wrong.

    But there is a specific mention of removing the extra cage if you’re riding a short crit.

    I’ve taken the 2nd off now anyway as I’m not road racing for a while.




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  25. @Teocalli

    @chuckp

    Nice – but Rule #26……..big dog and photo from the drive side!

    0

    I neither live nor die by The Rules :-)




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  26. @RobSandy

    @KogaLover

    @RobSandy

    Indeed, either remove cage or put same bidon in it.

    0

    I don’t think there’s anything in the rules about empty bottle cages – correct me if I’m wrong.

    But there is a specific mention of removing the extra cage if you’re riding a short crit.

    I’ve taken the 2nd off now anyway as I’m not road racing for a while.

    0

    Rule #78




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  27. @KogaLover

    @RobSandy

    @KogaLover

    @RobSandy

    Indeed, either remove cage or put same bidon in it.

    0

    I don’t think there’s anything in the rules about empty bottle cages – correct me if I’m wrong.

    But there is a specific mention of removing the extra cage if you’re riding a short crit.

    I’ve taken the 2nd off now anyway as I’m not road racing for a while.

    0

    Rule #78

    0

    That’s what I just said!

    No rule saying if you have 2 cages they both need a bottle in.

    Go on, check!




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  28. @RobSandy

    So we agree.




    0
  29. Haven’t posted a bike picture for a while but I’ve just finished glueing tubs to my new wheels. Hand built 60mm deep on Hope Pro RS4 with 25mm Vitoria Corsa G+ tubs. Can’t wait to ride them on Friday. It’ll be an especially good one as the family are over for half term and my son has brought his bike.

    These have got to make me significantly faster!

    Shit picture, I know. The lighting is all wrong so it came out yellow hence the B & W.




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  30. @chris

    What frame is that? Not seen it before.

    That whole set up looks the mutt’s nuts.




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  31. Thanks. I am deeply in love with it.

    It’s last year’s Cannondale CAAD12 Black Inc (Basically a CAAD 12 with a sexier paint job and a hi-mod carbon fork off the top end SuperSix rather than the standard fork).

    It’s currently decked out in 10 speed Sram Red that came off my crashed SuperSix and Cannondale cranks.

    The SuperSix is just about to return from the carbon frame repairers so I’m thinking about putting the Sram Red back on that (the groupset is a cannondale specific one with green highlights instead of red) and getting E-Tap for the CAAD 12.

    The CAAD12 will remain 53/39 and, being aluminium, will be the rufty tufty race bike, throw into a bike box and stick on the turbo trainer. The SuperSix will get a compact, the shallow section carbon tubulars and be the climbing bike.




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  32. @chris

    Haven’t posted a bike picture for a while but I’ve just finished glueing tubs to my new wheels. Hand built 60mm deep on Hope Pro RS4 with 25mm Vitoria Corsa G+ tubs. Can’t wait to ride them on Friday. It’ll be an especially good one as the family are over for half term and my son has brought his bike.

    These have got to make me significantly faster!

    Shit picture, I know. The lighting is all wrong so it came out yellow hence the B & W.

    0

    Badass! And looks especially so in B&W.




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  33. Getting my daughter to work on her photography skills shooting pics for my PEZ review of Lake CX402 shoes. Scheduled to be posted on Friday.




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  34. New daft mechanical alert – Set off on my commute this morning on my alloy Felt F75. At the first set of traffic lights I pulled away and something ‘lurched’. I pulled over and looked down to see that my left hand crank had slipped on the BB spindle. I’d forgotten to tighten the pinch bolts on the crank.

    I popped home and managed to get it off using some amount of brute force and persistence, and put it back on correctly.

    All seems fine, my question is though, what damage may I have done to the crank, BB spindle or BB itself?

    Obviously by having it slip I might have damaged the splines on the BB spindle and on the inside of the crank, but it fitted back on nicely enough.

    My bike felt like crap this morning, but that might be due to what was sitting on it, rather than a problem with the bike.




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  35. @RobSandy

    New daft mechanical alert – Set off on my commute this morning on my alloy Felt F75. At the first set of traffic lights I pulled away and something ‘lurched’. I pulled over and looked down to see that my left hand crank had slipped on the BB spindle. I’d forgotten to tighten the pinch bolts on the crank.

    I popped home and managed to get it off using some amount of brute force and persistence, and put it back on correctly.

    All seems fine, my question is though, what damage may I have done to the crank, BB spindle or BB itself?

    Obviously by having it slip I might have damaged the splines on the BB spindle and on the inside of the crank, but it fitted back on nicely enough.

    My bike felt like crap this morning, but that might be due to what was sitting on it, rather than a problem with the bike.

    0

    Visual inspection of the splines should be able to tell you if it is damaged. Any damage is likely to be confined to the ends of the spline so once fully engaged it is likely to be OK assuming you have not crunched a mash of broken splines into the whole thing……….

    Though if it all went in easily it is most likely fine.

    It’s funny how things seem to ride better after a bit of TLC and conversely feel crap after some negative TLC even though mechanically it is all as it was before.




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  36. @Teocalli

    @RobSandy

    New daft mechanical alert – Set off on my commute this morning on my alloy Felt F75. At the first set of traffic lights I pulled away and something ‘lurched’. I pulled over and looked down to see that my left hand crank had slipped on the BB spindle. I’d forgotten to tighten the pinch bolts on the crank.

    I popped home and managed to get it off using some amount of brute force and persistence, and put it back on correctly.

    All seems fine, my question is though, what damage may I have done to the crank, BB spindle or BB itself?

    Obviously by having it slip I might have damaged the splines on the BB spindle and on the inside of the crank, but it fitted back on nicely enough.

    My bike felt like crap this morning, but that might be due to what was sitting on it, rather than a problem with the bike.

    0

    Visual inspection of the splines should be able to tell you if it is damaged. Any damage is likely to be confined to the ends of the spline so once fully engaged it is likely to be OK assuming you have not crunched a mash of broken splines into the whole thing……….

    Though if it all went in easily it is most likely fine.

    It’s funny how things seem to ride better after a bit of TLC and conversely feel crap after some negative TLC even though mechanically it is all as it was before.

    0

    They looked fine and felt normal when I put it back on in the right place. Plus, I imagine once it’s in place it’s the compression of the pinch bolts that holds it, rather than the splines engaging.

    Just when I started riding pedaling felt really hard…like there was some drag around the BB. But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.




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  37. @RobSandy

    But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.

    0

    Always a dangerous place to go visiting…………

    Though you could check by dropping your chain off the chainring and see how freely the cranks spin.




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  38. @Teocalli

    @RobSandy

    But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.

    0

    Always a dangerous place to go visiting…………

    Though you could check by dropping your chain off the chainring and see how freely the cranks spin.

    0

    Bike and rider both fine. I may have slightly over torqued the main crank bolt, but you’d have thought as it’s only ‘finger tight’ that wouldn’t really be possible. I set some PR’s on the way home so it clearly wasn’t a problem.




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  39. Rode with the local chaingang at Lusail MotoGP circuit this evening. The plan was a swift 85 km in the two and a half hours the track was open to cyclists. Everything was going to plan, the average speed was a bit high, about 35 kph, until I punctured just after an hour.

    I think I’d jinxed myself. It was supposed to be the first ride on my new deep section tubulars but when it came to swapping out the brake pads to the carbon specific pads the screws holding the rear pads in were seized. I’d already swapped the front pads and I knew it was wrong but I thought “fuck it, the main aero benefit is in the front wheel” so went with miss matched wheels. Not just a deep section on the front and a relative shallow rear but a tubular on the front and a clincher on the rear.

    Someone must have been looking down from Mount Velomis and decreed it to be Anti-V.

    To add insult to injury it was the front that went. I’d only just glued the thing on!

    There’s a lesson in there somewhere.




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  40. @chris

    I would have bought a spare set of brake shoes and swapped the whole thing.

    Just saying.

    Do they do crits at that circuit? It’d be mega.




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  41. @RobSandy Thanks, sound advice but not particularly helpful.

    I only got round to doing it shortly before heading over to the circuit. Also parts like that aren’t always the easiest things to get hold of here.

    I think it maybe an issue around the valve stem so I’m hoping it’s the extender and not a repair job on the tubular. Still at best I’ll have to pull the tyre off, sort it and re-glue it. I’m out of glue and you can’t buy it here.

    They have held crits on the circuit. They’re more regularly held on between the two roundabouts on the service road to the west. I haven’t raced in one yet but will do when the season starts up again. At the moment it’s Zwift racing. I’ve got my first race tonight.

    Relive ‘Lusail Chaingang – Punctured’




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  42. @chris

    I didn’t think you’d thank me for it.

    It was my plan for my new race bike; have 2 wheelsets, one with allow rims and one with exalith rims, and swap the whole brake block/shoe part over.

    Then I realised I was being stupid, any time I wanted to ride that bike I’d want the nice wheels, and I could put the Nr.2 wheelset on my Nr.2 bike and simplify everything.

    Good luck with your Zwift race and any crits you do.

    I’ve been doing well this season, in that I’ve been consistently finishing top 10, and also badly in that I’ve not managed to finish higher than 5th yet. I’d really like some wins.

    I had my hardest ever 7th place last week. I attacked with 15 minutes still to race, managed to take one other strong guy with me and we worked and built up a bit of a gap. 3 others bridged and we all pulled hard but the bunch caught us with maybe about 5 minutes left to race.

    However, instead of anyone else coming through, the whole bunch just sat on, and after a couple of guys sat up and peeled off, I ended up on the front. After doing all that work I got the rage, and did a full-on badger snarl and kicked again, forming a new break of 6 guys. I think I actually said’ Fuck ‘Em!’ as I went.

    We almost stayed away again, the bunch came back to us on the last corner and a few guys managed to come around, but I was still up there so went from max effort breakaway mode to full gas sprint.

    On the plus side I managed a new max HR.




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  43. @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.




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  44. @chris

    I do like the manic wiggles you can generate on Relive https://www.relive.cc/view/1617363384




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  45. @chris

    @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.

    0

    It was hideous. But I felt very proud of myself for channelling the Badger during my second attack. I may have actually growled.

    My average power for the last 16 minutes of the race was 340w and that contained at least 5 times where I pushed 1,000w to attack or to sprint. Eyeballs out.




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  46. @RobSandy

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.

    0

    It was hideous. But I felt very proud of myself for channelling the Badger during my second attack. I may have actually growled.

    My average power for the last 16 minutes of the race was 340w and that contained at least 5 times where I pushed 1,000w to attack or to sprint. Eyeballs out.

    0

    Nipple lube. That’s impressive. My knees aren’t warranted above 750w at the moment.




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  47. I’ve read with some dismay the state of affairs with the management of this site. Nonetheless while it still lives, behold, my reincarnated ride. Tis an interesting tale to be sure.

    Build blog




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  48. @Keith

    Sweet. Where is that?




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  49. Scarborough, Queensland AU.

    https://www.google.com.au/maps/@-27.2029146,153.0970504,19z




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  50. Oh yes, this needs sharing. Chapeau Buck, chapeau Brett.

    http://chainslapmag.com/2018/06/insider-rides-bucks-hinault-custom/




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