Look Pro: Dress for Success
I recently overheard someone say that there is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing. This is the kind of statement that makes me want to hate people as a species a little bit. Of course there such a thing as bad weather. There are also bad people (loads of them), bad ideas (even bigger loads of them), bad advice (especially on the internet) and, despite what your mother told you, there certainly are stupid questions.
Despite being so clever as to render itself useless, there is a sentiment behind the claim that should be taken seriously, and that is the notion that if one is to venture out in bad weather, one should give some consideration to dressing appropriately for it. For example, I routinely see photos of Spanish Pros riding the trainer indoors in wooly hats and leggings. I would never ride indoors with leggings because the most redeeming quality of riding indoors is that you get to stare at your guns shamelessly without worry of being spotted doing so.
A Velominatus should take care to ensure they have a complete wardrobe of kit for different kinds of weather; bibs and jerseys, of course, but also arm and knee warmers, gilets, long sleeve jerseys, overshoes, gloves, caps, winter caps, knee warmers and leggings, and even jackets or rain coats depending on where you live and what kind of weather you encounter.
Always remember that the more you’re wearing, the worse you look. That’s not an opinion – that’s science. Perfection starts with bibs and a jersey, tanned guns, and a sweet set of shades. Next in line is the Flandrian Best, but after that, it’s all downhill, ending with the unfortunate invention of thermal bibs. They may be a necessity under some circumstances, just know they look complete crap, so you will too.
Still, its better than not riding, so as you’re getting ready to kit up for the day, I advise you take into account the following considerations.
- Overdressing is as bad as under dressing. Getting too hot is just as miserable as being too cold, so unless you’re deliberately overdressing in order to lose weight, dress like Goldilocks, not too hot and not too cold.
- Start out cold. Dress for how hard you’ll be riding that day; I like to dress such that I am chilly for the first 15 minutes of the ride because after the blood starts pumping or you hit the first hill, your core temp will rise and you’ll be perfectly dressed.
- Choose layers over bulk. Layers have the advantage that they can be combined in different ways to tune their effect. For example, a jersey with arm warmers and a gilet can be as warm as a long sleeve jersey, but allow you to shed the gilet and arm warmers if you get too warm.
- Windproof is more important than waterproof. If it keeps the water out, it will keep your sweat in as well, no matter what the label says about breathability. Which means you’re getting wet anyway. Windproof layers, on the other hand, will keep the wind from getting through to those wet fabrics so you can stay warm, and breathe much better than do waterproof materials. Unless its the kind of downpour that starts the animals lining up in twos, you won’t find me in a rain jacket.
- No ear muffs. If your ears get cold, get a proper winter cycling cap. We’re not savages after all.
Jeez, you lot are worse than Joan Rivers and the Fashion Police on E! News. Quote; @AI_S, Problem with most bib tights is that they’re just so garish – Dahling! OOH, what is a a boy to wear? Leg warmers on, or leg warmers off? To thermal or not to thermal? The black kit with the red trim or the white kit with the black trim? Choices, choices. Do not ever criticize your wives/partners for taking so long to get ready ever again! Ya big load of Jessies! (as we say in Sunny Scotland @Marcus)
You people be nice to Jon. Anybody entertaining enough to tell the founder of the site that he’s not welcome around theses parts needs to be encouraged to stick around. It could just be Frank having us on because he’s bored at work.
@PeakInTwoYears It could be Campagnolo Vince!
embro is your friend. First week of february in new england, if the sun is out…tights stay in.
@Jon
I for one have enjoyed the responses to @Jon’s post. The tangents and wit have been entertaining and have kept me coming back to the posts. If @Jon’s post was done earnestly though (and not some ruse to induce a response) then I have to point out there are remedies, but no cures for dumbassness.
@Cjcosgrove
You’re @Jon, aren’t you?
Back on topic. Indulge me with a response.
You’re heading out for an 80- to 100-km ride. There are five rated climbs on the route, with corresponding descents. It’s 5 degrees centigrade (celsius, whatever the fuck you call it) at home, and part of the route–after a sustained climb–follows a ridge line that’s always colder than anyplace else around. It’s not raining now, but it’s quite liable to. It’s not windy at home, but it’s always windy on parts of the route. What are you wearing on top, including under your helmet?
@PeakInTwoYears
Unfortunately not. He may be the Unibomber though.
@PeakInTwoYears
Base layer, jersey (long sleeve), gilet and wind jacket with a rain cape in the pocket just in case. Down below, regular shorts and leg warmers (the legs never get cold). Under the helmet, cap with ear warmers. That and THICK gloves. The mitts get cold after all.
I’ve given up on embrocation – it burns my legs for hours afterwards and only seems to do a so-so job during the ride. Maybe it’s user error.
wiscot – I’ve calmed down, thanks for the advice and consideration though! Actually, I had just returned from a ride. I had been inside all day so when I block out all the insanity of the world for eight hours, as opposed to diving right in for a morning commute, it’s even more shocking. I try to stay positive, but when the “smartest” of the next generation are just as selfish and stupid as everyone else, it shakes my hope for a brighter future.
Oooh, you and Larry Joe Bird are alums! Actually, did he ever earn (or be gifted) his degree from ISU?
Has anyone tried one of the possum fur caps?
@PeakInTwoYears
A plane ticket for the next flight to somewhere nicer
@ruud
Merckx on a crutch, have I made that mistake in spades. No gilet, regular kit and arm warmers, the lads head out from my house which was in the lee of a cold wind. We were on a point to point 140km ride. We realized a mile from home we were under-dressed but fuck it, it has to warm up. It can’t be this cold and windy the whole way? Yes, actually. What transpired was one of the most uncomfortable rides ever. I would have given a lot for a simple windproof gilet. That garment is the most important one of all. I think I stuffed mine in a jersey pocket every ride for the next two years, just in case.
Just like I enjoy how tiny changes (a zipper moved up/down a few centimeters) can make everything much better, I’m also constantly amazed how something like a flimsy gilet is the difference between an enjoyable ride and hell on wheels. The details certainly matter!
Also, this article is perfect for anyone not understanding the Rules or the discussion of the small details. I don’t wander about the night before an early morning winter ride wondering what I’m going to wear because I simply start with the basic kit and add additional bit as necessary. Life is easier when it is simplified!
@ruud
This is the beauty of layering, my man. You can take it off or put it on again later – especially if the temps actually change during the ride.
The point is, however, if you leave the house at a comfy temp, you’ll be shedding some of those layers within minutes.
@Ron
Yup. In Nashville, TN here. People are in their Flandrian Best when it’s 60F. Go out on a fine sunny 45F afternoon in winter and there’s nary a cycle in sight – too cold, everyone’s on the trainer. Lunacy.
@Ron
And That is why we call you people “damn” Yankees. You fucking move to our region, and run your damn mouth about how much smarter you are.
Good gloves are the key! Appropriate layers elsewhere and good gloves – I am good to minus 10C.
@PeakInTwoYears
I’m not sure if anyone has mentioned carful route planning yet, but I learned my lesson here.
I set out on what was to be a 120km ride last week, and all was going well until the 80km mark, when I came to a long, 2k spun-out downhill that descended all the way to sea level. I went from chilly-but-comfortable to bloody bonked, like that. The next climb helped a bit, but by then I’d come back to the fog – the sun was gone and the wraiths were chasing me. I was never able to get going hard enough to warm back up. The killer-there was one more 75 meter descent to go, straight down into the Dead Marshes. That’s when the MWTH slid up beside me and insisted we have a visit, so I sat down (meaning collapsed clumsily) onto the cold concrete and we chatted for a while. He encouraged me to make it an even 100km and hounded my last, miserable, shamefully agonizing 5k home. My takeaway was this: place your descents carefully.
On Sportsball Sunday I had a bit better luck with the weather, and got in a challenging but completely manageable 130km by keeping the end of the ride more up than down. The lack of fog was another huge factor for sure, which brings me to another point – until they make the proper kit for the inside of my lungs, cold, moist air will still be the great leveler.
@MaLóL
Hellsyeah I do! Gianni bought one for his mauka showers but realized Hawaii rules way too hard for such gear. So he sent it my way and my oh my, that is a fantastic jersey.
Stealth favorite among the Pros, too.
@Hashola
You obviously never saw Silver Linings Playbook.
@Buck Rogers
+1, matey. Also, its a joke. Starts with bitching about bad advice, then gives it.
@Jamie
Oh, please. Talk to me after 250 solo in the rain at 0C. Uphill both ways!
A wise man pointed out that staying warm like that comes down to your hat. Get a good winter cycling cap and you will stay toasty warm all day.
@Teocalli
This. This. This. This. This.
@teleguy57
HOLY FUCK HELLS YEAH!
@PedallingTom
Looking forward to the arrival of the Velominati Gilet and jersey…hopefully real soon! Snow expected in Portland this weekend.
@TheF
That is worse than uncomfortable, its outrageous and inexcusable. It is also the reason we’re here.
@Gianni
Dude, if you tell me this happened to you on Hawaii, I’m going to fly over and throat punch you (then buy you a few beers, followed up by a ride the next day).
February on a 160K ride, somewhere near the top of “Three Mile Climb” it started snowing. Not the light dry snow that just blows around, but the 1C snow that is heavy, wet an piles up on your arm warmers cm’s at a time. I thought when I crossed the steel grated Bridge of the Gods, if I fell, I’d shatter like a crystal vase and sprinkle into the Columbia below.
Layering is the key. And since the tie bit above happened some 20 years ago, be thankful that modern material allows you to match the kit with the conditions.
The Bridge of the Gods is pretty gnarly even when it’s dry and warm:
@@ mrs engine
Can you make an audio clip of that? I hear Wikipedia is starting to upload audio files of famous people onto the site profiles. Being the first female Scottish gangster, that will likely earn you a spot.
“Always remember that the more you’re wearing, the worse you look.”
within limits Team Sky
@strathlubnaig
+1
I’ve found an over active thyroid helps, keeps you warm from the inside and also trim.
unfortunately your resting HR is about 90 and you’re fooked all the time.
roger
That’s a lot of Rapha, dog.
@PeakInTwoYears
String work!
@unversio
You’ve come a long way, my child.
@frank
Even I am not such a big pussy as that. I bought it as the nuclear option in case it rained during our KT2012 Roubaix riding. It would not be useful on Maui unless riding at the summit on those occasional snowy stormy days. Oye, that’s not going to happen.
Between the Nanoflex and Gabba I wear during the late, off, and early season here you would think I was a rolling Castelli billboard….but I wouldn’t live without it. It is *litterally* my Flandrian Best.
That said, life may be taking me temporarily out of my adopted home(better not be longer than 3 years, damnit!) and to Atlanta, Ga. where I fear it will be a barren wasteland for cycling(I hear they finally have 50m of bike path now somewhere to the east of the city)…but I am very saddened at this prospect. Though I will have the LvdK to keep me company…though a Vlaams making her way in the US South might be a sight to see =)
Anyone have any opinions on cycling in Atlanta? Seems like the weather should be better most of the year(not necessarily a good thing…). But considering Car is King there…I am concerned with inter-vehicle confabulation.
Cheers,
John
Cheers
@johnthughes
I’ve been to Atlanta precisely once and know three things about it:
1 – It doesn’t have a centre
2 – Large parts of it smell of wee when it rains
3 – There is at least one bike club because I watched them ride past a couple of times
@johnthughes
Because editing isn’t possible, I feel I should correct something….it should be a “…Vlaamse making her way…”, the LvdK is most definitely now and always has been a woman, I did not mean to imply, by my fledgling grasp her mother tongue, any gender ambiguity.[*please stop hitting me in the head with my dutch book*]
@the Engine
I have been there a number of time for work and because I have some very close friends there. It’s basically one of them that is making me an offer I am not sure I can refuse.
Yeah, the work is in the north suburbs(god I even hate typing that word), in Duluth. Though the company and the project are definitely awesome. There is a center, just no one there after 6pm.
I lived in NYC for 11 years…nuff said about wee smells
There are clubs…but no so far I have found start or end their rides at Belgian beer bars…or even bars that serve Belgian beer. I am sorry, I am willing to do lots of things, make exceptions for some things….but no beer immediately after my ride???? That is not acceptable!
Thanks for the input @the Engine!
@johnthughes
Fourth thing – the beer was terrible
Here’s some useful advice. Stop giving useful advice!!!
look pro? Unless you are receiving a paycheck for the express purpose of racing your bicycle you’re nothing different from all the dweebs wearing the full uniform of their NBA team to the local court.
These are the real Fred’s of cycling.
@Robert at what point does the article mention wearing team gear? Have a quick look over at the Rules & you’ll notice numbers 16 & 17 are pretty clear about that kind of stuff…
@Teocalli
Combinations of those components not the sum of…
Although sometimes I feel like I need them all on club runs to stop myself freezing to death during the interminably long cake stops.
@EBruner
It has nothing to do with “smarter,” but strictly with the fact that I like to spend more than a few weeks a year outdoors. Just as this article implores, pull on the right gear & get the heck out there.
Also, I watched “Terms of Endearment” over the weekend with the VMH. Classic when Lithgow tells the checkout gal, “You can’t talk to people like that, you have to be nice.” I was being nice. “You must be from New York then.” The VMH rolled her eyes.
@Ron
Yes. Here in the South we have the quaint custom of requiring that people have manners and show respect. This is primarily because we’re all armed to the fucking teeth, and the understanding is that a serious breach of etiquette may result in an exchange of fire.
The “Harvard of The South” is Vanderbilt University, and @Ron obviously has a grievance against the femme undergrads. @Ron, I suggest the application of 20 repeats of Pulltight Hill, followed by a long meditation on the merits of young women in yoga pants whilst recovering at the Yazoo brewery.
I just had to register to argue with this one!
I assure you, this statement is perfectly valid in Iceland. It only takes one winter of commuting to permanently burn it into your brain. In fact it may only take one day as all four seasons can make an appearance during a single 15 km commute.
@antihero
I was just contemplating the name of the road with the context above and looking for a different lunchtime rain loop on the map here and noticed that my planned loop goes down French Lane into Screw Corner Road which then goes past Mount Pleasant and Halnacker Copse…..
@frank
This fuck’in killed me this morning.
@frank
An even wiser man (the late Shug Donald of the Regent CC) used to say (in the 80s) when folk complained about gear not properly protecting them against the shitty Scottish elements, “The only think that keeps ye dry is the fuckin’ hoose!” Would loved to have heard what he would say about the folks who wear full winter gear with temps in the 60s.
@Ron
I’m sure ISU gave Larry Bird (aka the ugliest white man to ever play in the NBA, and lets-not-talk-about-the-mustache) a degree. He put them on the map for sure. The hick from French Lick was ugly, but applied Rule V in the fullest way possible on the basketball court.
Footwear development process from Mavic on Vimeo.
I started “living the dream” again by working at a bike shop again. I like that they carry Endura’s clothing line but I loathe the number of YJAs hanging on the racks.