La Vie Velominatus: Addiction

I feel it in my bones. I feel it in my breathing. I fixate on how much I feel it in my legs to the point where I find myself in a meeting, rubbing them to gauge how soft they’ve gotten. (Must learn to stop doing that in public as it can’t possibly improve my social standing. I’m tempted to cite the fact that I’m a Cyclist and it is normal in our circles, but I’m afraid that will only serve to drag the rest of you down with me rather than prove my case.)

For most uf us, life gets in the way of Cycling when we’re not careful to ensure it doesn’t, and having a goal sketched out before you can be helpful in keeping focus. In the run-up to Keepers Tour, I managed to stay disciplined and make room in my schedule to get on the bike regularly enough to get fit. But goals also have the effect of leaving a void once attained. In the aftermath of the trip, I’ve been hopelessly caught between conflicting priorities as I struggle to catch up after those few weeks away; without a goal in sight to make sure the bike gets assigned its due importance, I find myself riding the bike less than I’ve become accustomed to.

Of course, I do find satisfaction with each ride I manage to get out on, and I take comfort in the knowledge that things will settle down again and balance will be restored. It is during these times, however, when the feeling in my legs, lungs, and bones serve to constantly remind me that I’m a little less fit than I was yesterday that I realize what the bicycle is: an addiction.

I don’t want to speak for anyone else, but I wouldn’t be able to make a convincing argument against anyone classifying me as having an addictive personality. And, based on the assumption that you’re reading this and relate on some level to what I’m saying, then you probably have one, too; it seems to be a bit of an occupational hazard for the Velominati. Consider the following from WikiPedia, which represents a body of work by people whose credibility and identity is impossible to verify. Everything but the bit about “weak commitment” and “stress” rings true:

An individual is considered to be at the risk of developing…addictions when he/she displays signs of impulsive behavior, nonconformity combined with a weak commitment to the goals for achievement valued by the society, a sense of social alienation, and a sense of heightened stress. Such a person may switch from one addiction to another; or even sustain multiple addictions at different times.

The article goes on to define this condition as a “brain desease”. That sounds more “insulting” than it does “scientific”, but I have no choice but to submit to the authority of those whose credibility I can’t disprove. So, in the face of an overwhelming lack of evidence of being incorrect, it has to be assumed that we (or at least I) have broken brains, though as I write this I suppose this fact shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone who has been paying any attention at all. On the other hand, we already aspire to be heroin-thin, so I suppose it’s fitting that we have an addiction to go along with the appearance.

Having told you now what you presumably already knew, I’ll close with the following sentiment: so long as I’m destined to be addicted to something, I’m glad it is Cycling, which I consider to be something healthy and positive, instead of something destructive like crack or reading.

Vive la Vie Velominatus.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

View Comments

  • ...like crack or reading.

    Or spending too much time chatting on the internet with other men who shave their legs and wear tight lycra.

    Or waiting for yet another entertaining fight between @minion and @Marcus.

    Or watching bike racing live on my computer instead of getting ready for work.

    Or working.

    Or bathing.

  • "something destructive like crack or reading"

    Likewise, I'm sure as shit not addicted to spelling correctly.

    @Oli

    Stop enabling me, you pack of junkies!!

    After the pic of Yates looking like Sickboy from trainspotting, then this article, I'm beginnning to wonder what I've gotten myself into - but to continue the trainspotting analogy, if anyone's mother superior (the dealer from aforementioned movie) round here it's gotta be Oli - just look at his man cave! Probably like being on smack, being in there, if you're a cyclist. Not that I'd know about smack.

  • @mcsqueak
    We're does school fall in there? That's my biggest obstacle. Then I gotta work cause I have bills. Then I gotta study cause of school. Then I gotta clean, do laundry and sleep. I'm royally fucked guys. Every time I look at my bike I have pangs in my heart. I keep hoping to turn that around soon.

  • @RedRanger

    School? I've done been grad-e-aited for something like 5 years now. Just the job and the VMH to fill my time, so I'm pretty lucky in that way. Though I have found commuting to work makes it a lot easier to get in miles without having to rush home after work to try and catch the last daylight of the evening.

  • @mcsqueak
    A-Merckx! And good for you. I'm getting to the stage of trying to work out how to get me another sabbatical to start when this one ends at the end of June (200 on 100 will be the official end of my year's leave). I can't say that the year has been a professional boon for my research, and I'm not sure a pic of my guns stuck onto my annual report will do me any favours, but good work's been done on that front...

  • Red Ranger - as an undergrad I play a varsity sport. Now as a grad student I ride my bike. For me I have tons of free time because even riding my bike a lot doesn't come close to the amount of time spent practicing, playing games, traveling, rehab for injuries, special team meetings, weight training during my previous sporting days.

    I'm worried how wife, kids, housework will but into my riding time though. We'll see shortly!

  • ugh - edit - "played" and then "bite" but hey, wife and kids might indeed butt into riding time...

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