Every Day is Leg Day

At work or at rest, it's leg day
At work or at rest, it’s leg day. Photo: Tom Boonen

The proclamation is heard in the office, on social media, at the bar with friends; “It’s leg day.” When someone utters “it’s leg day” the accompanying tone of resentment and even dread is usually followed by an audible “ugh”. This exasperation belies one fact, the person making the utterance is not a cyclist. It’s likely they are a part of the Crossfit cult or on a fitness regimen to tone up and look good in a swimsuit. My immediate thought is, no shit it’s leg day, isn’t every day leg day?

As Cyclists, we cultivate our legs ritualistically. They provide the power that propels us deep into the pain cave, to freedom and to exaltation. Sure, we can talk about building the engine that is our heart and lungs. We do intervals, hill repeats, and sprints to increase aerobic capacity but the act of pushing on our pedals is what makes us move. It is our guns and our guns only that provide the visual evidence of our deposits into the V-Bank. The following is a simple list of acts the Velominati partake in that demonstrate that Every Day is Leg Day:

  • Shaving ( Rule #33 )
  • Crisp and clean tan line cultivation ( Rule #7 )
  • Not taking the stairs when the elevator goes to the 2nd floor
  • Recovery Days
  • Getting a Happy DeVlaeminck
  • Not lifting weights, grocery bags, or small children if it can be avoided
  • Gun-oriented narcissism
  • Riding bikes at the exclusion of any other form of exercise except sex (in which case you’ve gone Post-race Kelly and it’s a recovery day and therefore, Leg Day)

The Pros go to great lengths in not using their legs to power anything but their bicycles. Coppi used to have his soigneur carry him up flights of stairs to the hotel room. Hincapie would make sure his phone, remote, and other personal needs were at arms’ length on Recovery Days so he wouldn’t have to get off the couch. I wonder if he looked for apartments in Gerona with the toilet in the living room.

Of course most of us are endomorphs who look to be prepubescent boys with bald legs, baby smooth faces, and farmer’s tans. But our legs, our legs are bronzed and chiseled works of effort that would inspire Michelangelo and be worthy of any swimsuit edition (as long as it focuses on the waist down). So regardless of our buggy-whip arms and pencil-necks, let’s celebrate. The next time you hear someone bemoan their own personal leg day hell, remember that for you as well it is leg day. Take pride in the fact that you are a Velominatus and that for you, Every Day is Leg Day. Because on that day, regardless of the day of the week or where on your training calendar it lands, you have done something to honor your pins.

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167 Replies to “Every Day is Leg Day”

  1. @Ron

    My problem is that on days I take off to work on other things, I spend time dwelling on that negative space. Just like chasing a break you don’t need to, this is wasted energy.

    When you have to take some days off the bike, how do you just let it go? Focus on the next ride? Realize your passion for cycling ain’t goin’ nowhere?

    Or, is this about the Hunger. Just put that fire into the task at hand, whether it is training in the saddle or churning out a project?

    The Hunger and Every Day is Leg Day are two sides of the same coin, no?

    @ all the Rule #33 curious

    The missus, and/or the teenage daughter, is going to bust your chops about something.  So:

    (1) make it worthwhile.  What could be more worthwhile than complying with The Rules?

    (2) For the more Machiavellian among you, maybe she’ll be so busy busting you about shaving your legs, you’ll be able to slip something else by — for the sake of fantasy, let’s call it a new bike — and she won’t even notice.

  2. @dancing up the hills

    Greetings Velominati, I’m new in these parts. a short intro, I’ve been on the bike a few years now. I’ve been lurking, laughing and learning from this site for a while recently, gradually ticking off compliance of rules.

    @KW

    I decided yesterday to commit properly to cycling with Rule #33. Many hours in the saddle today and the appearance of tan lines already – March in the uk. My joy of cycling has gone up significantly.

    See it only takes one day of sunshine in the UK for girls to start wearing mini skirts and the Velominati to start on the tan lines.  I guess that is why we have the highest proportion of soft top cars per head of population in Europe!

    Which day was that again…you know where the sun came out the rain and wind stopped and you were able to slip in to shorts?  I must have missed that one!

    Welcome to the site.

  3. @marko

    It’s no wonder this convo turned largely into to shaving. Fair enough, discussions take on their own life around here and shaving is certainly part and parcel for Velominati. That said, it’s also about the negative space between training and living our lives. The thought we put into our guns when we’re not riding. Also reveling in the pain we put our legs through that everybody else who exercises seems to loathe. Maybe the sequel will be “No Day is Arm Day.”

    Actually it started with waxing but all the bloody shavers hijacked my question!  Despite that it was a great article…

  4. @Ron

    @frank

    @Ron

    Crossfit. I went off my meds a few weeks back & I’ll try to remain calm. But, paying good money to go throw a tire around downtown city blocks? Good lord, exercise scams never cease.

    I totally see your point, but given the obesity situation around here, I’m just happy to see people working out. There is one around the corner from where I live and some people just have to sign up for something in order to find the motivation to get a workout.

    Not my cup of tea, but if it gets some people active, then I don’t have an issue with it.

    Very excellent point. There are just plenty of things I enjoy doing that involve exercise, so it’s hard for me to understand doing something you dread and paying for it.

    That sounds awfully close to a violation of Rule #10 and/or Rule #25..

    Don’t we all spend too much on our bikes? And if you don’t have a bit of dread then you aren’t climbing enough or hard enough.

  5. I would like to take a moment to unhijack this thread, which has degenerated into utter  nonsense.   We sound like a bunch of pre-pubescent girls.  Just shave the fucking things and get on with it.

  6. @antihero

    I would like to take a moment to unhijack this thread, which has degenerated into utter nonsense. We sound like a bunch of pre-pubescent girls. Just shave the fucking things and get on with it.

    Agreed. There should be a “fight club” adjunct to Rule #33.

    i.e. Don’t talk about shaving your guns.

  7. @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.”  I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

  8. @KW 

    I am also “genetically pre-disposed to Rule #33 compliance.”  My wife didn’t notice I had shaved for a full two weeks.

  9. @frank

    @Ron

    Crossfit. I went off my meds a few weeks back & I’ll try to remain calm. But, paying good money to go throw a tire around downtown city blocks? Good lord, exercise scams never cease.

    I totally see your point, but given the obesity situation around here, I’m just happy to see people working out. There is one around the corner from where I live and some people just have to sign up for something in order to find the motivation to get a workout.

    Not my cup of tea, but if it gets some people active, then I don’t have an issue with it.

    Quite the case where I live as well.  The land of fried everything…..

    A silently cheer the grossly overweight “runners” I occasionally see while out for a ride.  In a way, I supposed they’re suffering quite a bit in the brief moment I pass them by, but cheers to them for getting out doing something about it!

  10. @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    Soft commitment for me too; finally got on the roads yesterday for the first time since early Jan!  About 90 min riding the mtb — my training has gone off the rails so I need to get back on track so I can actually survive the darn event.

    On the good news front, my Hampsten ti Gran Paridiso has shipped and Fedex keeps showing a Monday delivery!  Will get it built up ASAP and out on the roads for shakedown and fine tuning of position etc.  Could be a long but delightful evening as I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F.  Sheesh, this is getting old…..

  11. @teleguy57

    @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    …………… I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F. Sheesh, this is getting old…..

    I would like to find old man winter and kick him squarely in his balls, and then punch him in the throat!

  12. @VeloSix

    @VeloSix

    @teleguy57

    @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    …………… I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F. Sheesh, this is getting old…..

    I would like to find old man winter and kick him squarely in his balls, and then punch him in the throat!

    All you Wisco riders need to come do the Heck of the North. Thus far, there are 10 Velominati signed up. Peeps coming from the PNW, New York, Scotland, Wisconsin. There is no reason for you not to show up. I’ve been back channeling Wiscot on this but all you dudes need to start making plans. This could very well end up being the V-gathering of the season in lieu of a KT. It’s going to rule.

    http://www.heckofthenorth.com/

  13. @Marko

    @VeloSix

    @VeloSix

    @teleguy57

    @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    …………… I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F. Sheesh, this is getting old…..

    I would like to find old man winter and kick him squarely in his balls, and then punch him in the throat!

    All you Wisco riders need to come do the Heck of the North. Thus far, there are 10 Velominati signed up. Peeps coming from the PNW, New York, Scotland, Wisconsin. There is no reason for you not to show up. I’ve been back channeling Wiscot on this but all you dudes need to start making plans. This could very well end up being The V-gathering of the season in lieu of a KT. It’s going to rule.

    http://www.heckofthenorth.com/

    As much as I would love to be there, it’s about a month after the aforementioned Velominipper is to arrive. I am quite certain that if the subject were broached, the ability to create additional nippers could be seriously compromised.

  14. @RedRanger

    @The Oracle Im in the Wausau area now. get thee a bike and hitch a ride with me

    Red, I just signed up and live in West Bend. Let’s keep in touch and save me a spot in da van! Happy to pitch in on fuel of all types.

    How to describe the weekend to others so they don’t think I’m crazy? I’m not sure: Spending the weekend riding 104 miles on bad roads with no support., traveling and staying with men who shave their legs I met on the internet. What could be more fun?

  15. ^^^^^^^ that link

    ‘the girls eh, they want to come and touch my legs. and my arse’ –  Forstermann

  16. @Marko

    @VeloSix

    @VeloSix

    @teleguy57

    @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    …………… I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F. Sheesh, this is getting old…..

    I would like to find old man winter and kick him squarely in his balls, and then punch him in the throat!

    All you Wisco riders need to come do the Heck of the North. Thus far, there are 10 Velominati signed up. Peeps coming from the PNW, New York, Scotland, Wisconsin. There is no reason for you not to show up. I’ve been back channeling Wiscot on this but all you dudes need to start making plans. This could very well end up being The V-gathering of the season in lieu of a KT. It’s going to rule.

    http://www.heckofthenorth.com/

    Another great reason to buy a new bike!   Just not in time for this…..  Although I will put this on the to do list!!

  17. @wiscot

    @RedRanger

    @The Oracle Im in the Wausau area now. get thee a bike and hitch a ride with me

    Red, I just signed up and live in West Bend. Let’s keep in touch and save me a spot in da van! Happy to pitch in on fuel of all types.

    How to describe the weekend to others so they don’t think I’m crazy? I’m not sure: Spending the weekend riding 104 miles on bad roads with no support., traveling and staying with men who shave their legs I met on the internet. What could be more fun?

    Trust me, tha is exactly how my wife is going to hear it.

  18. @The Oracle Tell her we have a great track record with Keepers Tours and Cogals. So far there’s only been one documented instance of stalking.

  19. @marko

    @The Oracle Tell her we have a great track record with Keepers Tours and Cogals. So far there’s only been one documented instance of stalking.

    Stalker? That’s no way to talk about Mike Sinyard!

  20. @KW

    @Marko

    @VeloSix

    @VeloSix

    @teleguy57

    @The Oracle

    @Kyle

    @KW Given the current state of Wisconsin weather, you could be wearing tights/leg warmers until the blessed event. Shave them once the nipper arrives. She’ll be too tired/busy to notice.

    On the topic or riding in Wisconsin, I’ve committed to the Cheesehead Roubaix. Who else is in?

    I’ve got a “soft commitment.” I think @wiscot is planning on attending as well.

    …………… I would love to get it out Tues (forecast here about 35F) since Wed’s high drops back to 24F. Sheesh, this is getting old…..

    I would like to find old man winter and kick him squarely in his balls, and then punch him in the throat!

    All you Wisco riders need to come do the Heck of the North. Thus far, there are 10 Velominati signed up. Peeps coming from the PNW, New York, Scotland, Wisconsin. There is no reason for you not to show up. I’ve been back channeling Wiscot on this but all you dudes need to start making plans. This could very well end up being The V-gathering of the season in lieu of a KT. It’s going to rule.

    http://www.heckofthenorth.com/

    As much as I would love to be there, it’s about a month after the aforementioned Velominipper is to arrive. I am quite certain that if the subject were broached, the ability to create additional nippers could be seriously compromised.

    That’s my wedding anniversary weekend.  My attendance would likely result in a similar fate.

  21. @Kyle

    That’s my wedding anniversary weekend. My attendance would likely result in a similar fate.

    Absolutely no excuse. I refer the honourable gentleman to the Caledonian Cogal on which my beloved Velomissus and I will celebrate our 20th anniversary.

  22. @marko

    @The Oracle Tell her we have a great track record with Keepers Tours and Cogals. So far there’s only been one documented instance of stalking.

    The PDX Cogal. It’s how Frank, G’rilla and I became friends.

  23. @The Oracle

    @wiscot

    @RedRanger

    @The Oracle Im in the Wausau area now. get thee a bike and hitch a ride with me

    Red, I just signed up and live in West Bend. Let’s keep in touch and save me a spot in da van! Happy to pitch in on fuel of all types.

    How to describe the weekend to others so they don’t think I’m crazy? I’m not sure: Spending the weekend riding 104 miles on bad roads with no support., traveling and staying with men who shave their legs I met on the internet. What could be more fun?

    Trust me, tha is exactly how my wife is going to hear it.

    I have presented myself as a pretty easy target; I’ve been to more events like this than anyone else, and so far every single person has been ultra cool – not one nutjob.

    Actually, that’s not really true. Everyone of us I’ve met is a nutjob, but in the most delightful way. No serial killers yet. Not even any douchebags.

  24. @ChrisO

    @Kyle

    That’s my wedding anniversary weekend. My attendance would likely result in a similar fate.

    Absolutely no excuse. I refer the honourable gentleman to the Caledonian Cogal on which my beloved Velomissus and I will celebrate our 20th anniversary.

    You really do get the highest marks possible for that. It should be mentioned more often how strictly you and your family embrace Rule #11.

  25. @John

    @wiscot When and where in WI is the Cheesehead Roubaix? Damn, it’s 40 F today. Summer has arrived.

    well it’s safe to say Autumn is still a little way off down here in South Australia, 42 C was the highest temp recorded during yesterday’s 120k hangover recovery session…

  26. All this talk of the Cheesehead Roubaix reminds me that the Dairy Roubaix is coming up soon. April 19th in western WI. Check it out.

  27. @frank

    @ChrisO

    @Kyle

    That’s my wedding anniversary weekend. My attendance would likely result in a similar fate.

    Absolutely no excuse. I refer the honourable gentleman to the Caledonian Cogal on which my beloved Velomissus and I will celebrate our 20th anniversary.

    You really do get the highest marks possible for that. It should be mentioned more often how strictly you and your family embrace Rule #11.

    Absolutely Frank – possibly some sort of permanent Sean Kelly icon just for me, or a little blue plaque.

    But while I sense your sarcasm what can I say – Rule #1, Rule #2 and Rule #3 apply here and I am simply instructing them. If people want to come on here complaining about being pussy-whipped into not riding their bikes they really need to either re-think their lives or obey the Masturbation Principle.

    Noting of course that strict application of Rule #11 might result in Principally Masturbation.

  28. @Deakus

    Nothing wrong with waxing over shaving – did it for around 5 to 7 years, only stopped cause I moved to a workplace without any surrounding beautians. Found it to be quick (35mins after they know you), pain-free (after about 6 months the follicle bulb gets smaller) and lasted around a month.

    Develop a relationship with a specific beautician – they get comfotable with you and you get better service. Cyclists make good customers – the muscles (especially if flexed) and low body fat percentage means the skin is much tighter than a womans and the waxing is easier as hair comes out easier with a tighter ‘canveas’ to come off.

    Hope this helps

  29. @Spider

    “Develop a relationship with a specific beautician”

    Already done!  She does it for free, feeds me beer during the process so she can take as long as she likes!

    As a minor non cycling related update her statement last night was.  “This weekend the six nations has all 3 matches back to back on Saturday, shall we just get twice as much beer as last time and do a Leo Sayer?”

    I mean if Carlsberg made girlfriends……

    It looks like a perfect Saturday.  The forecast is good for once, temps are up so it should be shorts and tan lines only.  Early morning ride followed by an entire day with the VMH watching Le Grand Finale of the Six Nations Rugby with vast quantities of hop related recovery beverages!!

  30. Can someone let me know the secret of where to stop shaving on the leg or how to blend? I don’t really want to stop at the shorts line as it will end up looking like a pair of hairy boxer shorts/underwear whatever you guys call them over the pond. Should one blend? If so, how?

    Many thank (Confused) ;-)

  31. @Paul 8v Electric trimmers with no attachment to get things manageable, then shave to the top of the thigh.  One thing: I get brutal razor burn and in-growns if I shave against the grain on the thighs, especially the backs, so it’s against-the-grain smoothness below the tan-line, with and gently (diagonally) across the grain above, being careful as the grain goes in different directions on all four sides.  And coconut oil might be the best alternative to shaving cream I’ve seen.

  32. @Paul 8v

    Can someone let me know the secret of where to stop shaving on the leg or how to blend? I don’t really want to stop at the shorts line as it will end up looking like a pair of hairy boxer shorts/underwear whatever you guys call them over the pond. Should one blend? If so, how?

    Many thank (Confused) ;-)

    @McSqueak nailed it when he said something to the effect “start at the toes and stop at the eyebrows”.

  33. @Paul 8v [ George Clooney voice as Fantastic Mr. Fox ] “You might try taking everything!”

    “Blending is not a good option.”

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