It’s not difficult to understand that climate change, global warming, call it what you will, is real. If you’re still in denial about this fact then you are probably one or more of three things: ignorant, complicit or a complete moron. You can cite all the statistics you want, read the reports, or just stick your head out of the window and realise it’s fucking hot, but the only evidence for the environmentally aware Cyclist is this:

It hasn’t rained at Paris-Roubaix for thirteen years.

Not since The Lion soloed in from 40k’s out to take home his last cobblestone paperweight in 2002 has there been a proper wet Hell Of The North. The preceding year was even worse, or better depending on your perception of Rule #9 conditions and whether you take pleasure in others’ torment. I guess most of us here have a foot firmly in both camps, enthusiastically summoning the rain gods to take a piss on Northern France on the second Sunday in April. The resulting lack of precipitation only confirms that gods don’t exist, or don’t bloody listen.

In a final act of desperation, I’ll be buying some gumboots, Wellingtons, Alaskan sneakers when we hit Lille for Keepers Tour 15. Hopefully this will draw some moisture from the sky and add to the spectacle that will be Tommeke gunning for his 5th, Faboo trying to equal him, and Wiggins having a laugh. This has all the ingredients for an all-time classic Classic. Just add water.

*Why would you miss this opportunity to be part of history? Keepers Tour is the best value cobbled week tour available. Sign up now. Bring your Wellies.

Brett

Don't blame me

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  • One day, there was a mishap about 40 miles from home. Only since then do I carry the chain tool I needed. I have never needed to use it.

    The gods of Rule #9 are not summoned with gumboots. To prepare is to prevent.

  • I'll be buying some gumboots, Wellingtons, Alaskan sneakers when we hit Lille for Keepers Tour 15. Hopefully this will draw some moisture from the sky

    @Champs

    The gods of Rule #9 are not summoned with gumboots. To prepare is to prevent.

    Absolutely, I'd be packing the factor 50, the deck chair, a Jilly Cooper and a bottle of Pimms

  • @brett

    " In a final act of desperation, I'll be buying some gumboots, Wellingtons, Alaskan sneakers when we hit Lille for Keepers Tour 15. Hopefully this will draw some moisture from the sky"

    Don't forget the timeless and ever popular " washing of the car " to ensure it pisses down.

    Works for me every time.

  • @Barracuda

    @brett

    Don't forget the timeless and ever popular " washing of the car " to ensure it pisses down.

    Works for me every time.

    Tried and true. I wonder if it works with bikes?

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