Velominati Super Prestige: 2011 La Vuelta a España

Photo: REUTERS / Miguel Vidal

Spain is an awesome country. It has amazing scenery, culture, cities and chicas… oh, the chicas. Its football competition features the world’s best players, their national team are the reigning World Cup holders, and they boast world champions in tennis, Moto GP, Superbikes and Formula 1. They regularly kick the collective asses of France and Italy, and a lot of other European countries when it comes to bicycle racing, although most of their recent heroes have somewhat of a cloud hanging over them. So why does their Grand Tour hardly raise an eyebrow when compared to the other two big tours, and why the fuck do they still allow cowards on horses armed with poison darts to taunt and kill a beast as noble as el toro for ‘entertainment’?

I can’t really answer the last one, but the fact that La Vuelta is treated like the road racing equivalent of a red-headed stepchild is about as fair as the Corrida itself. To me, and to many pros, it is seen as a tour of redemption. Those who, for one reason or another, either due to bad luck, bad management or bad form suffered a less-than-stellar Tour de France, now get a chance to make something of their season and add a ‘major’ to their palmares. Riders like Jan Ullrich, who in 1999 took the amarillo jersey after sitting out Le Tour with a dicky knee. 2008 saw Contador make amends after his Astana team was prevented from starting le Grande Boucle under a doping cloud. In fact, La Vuelta and doping have more than a passing aquaintance, with Valverde winning while under a pending hearing in 2009, and of course little Robbie Heras getting stripped of his 05 title after an EPO positive. Last year wasn’t without its own scandal, with a positive for 2nd place ‘sensation’ Ezequiel Mosquera dragging La Vuelta’s name through the red dust again. It could well be the dirtiest tour of them all, a race that itself seeks atonement as much as those who race it.

This year’s edition has the same sense of redemption written all over it, with some of Le Tour’s unfortunates having a crack at it. There’s Wiggo, who was in the self-proclaimed form of his life before snapping his twig-like collarbone early on. Can he show us what he had promised on the roads of France in the Dauphine, or will the Spanish heat and steep, long climbs be too much for him? How about Jurgen Van den Broeck, also looking great before his own clavicle calamity ended his July. Invisible Denis will also be there, his Geox team considered not good enough for the Tour, out to show that he’s still a force and add to his two Spanish victories. Other battered old warhorses who will never give up easily are Andreas Klöden and Carlos Sastre, but father time may have finally taken its toll on this duo.

In reality, it’ll probably come down to the younger brigade made up of last year’s winner Vinnie Nibali, J-Rod, Scarponi, and Anton. It could be a blow-out, or one of the best races of the year. We may even get another drug controversy to keep up the status quo of years gone by. Whatever happens is anybody’s guess, which is why this race is one of the hardest to pick for VSP contenders, and one that might even be as exciting, vibrant and colourful as the country it traverses for three hot weeks.

So pour yourself a glass of Sangria, give the start list a long or glancing look, and post your picks before 5am Pacific time (yeah, I don’t know when the hell that is either…) and if you have any doubts, confusion or questions, head to the VSP page for clarification, rules and/or rebuttals. No horsing around, no bullshit.

Buena suerte!

 

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635 Replies to “Velominati Super Prestige: 2011 La Vuelta a España”

  1. VaE + mountaintop finish + 23% grade 3km from the top = Un-fucking-believable! What a day for a ‘support’ rider like Cobo. THIS is why we love this sport!!

  2. I’m guessing there will be more than a few rest day subs for Cobo coming tomorrow…

  3. Wiggins hit the 23% section and simply ran out of gears – and legs. What a beautifully brutal climb.

  4. Wow, that threw a monkey-wrench in the VSP. Back to opening-week points with a six-way tie going to Torvid at a whopping 5 points.

    [vsp_results id=”9276″]
    [/vsp_results]

  5. Sorry but that’s f*cking outrageous.

    An ‘extra-terreste’ performance by a rider from out of the blue…
    … in a squad managed by a man whose claim to fame (apart from Liege-Bastogne-Liege) was spending 10 days in hospital suspected of a doping transfusion…
    … whose previous job was managing the team which included Piepoli and Ricco.

    Add it up people.

  6. @ChrisO
    Before all the conspiracy theories set in, consider the gear settings of the GC top 5 (at the beginning of the day): Wiggins: 38×32, Froome: 36×28, Mollema: 36×28, Cobo: 36×32, Fuglsang: 36×28.

    I’m not calling this an ironclad defense, but it seems as though Cobo was spinning the lowest gear on the way up (and it certainly looked like it). Wiggins seemed to run of gas and gears just before the camera crashed.

  7. @all Re: DNF Swaps

    The reason you’re allowed to change all five picks is because we need to account for the scenario that the top favorite could DNF due to a crash, meaning that all four of your remaining picks would slide up a postion. If we allow DNF swaps at all, we need to allow for an ad-hoc swapping, also accounting for the major upset of balance to the top five if a top favorite DNF’s.

    This is why the DNF picks are governed by the Piti Principle; if you swap out riders just to try to gain points, you’re violating the principle. If you changed multiple riders, you need to provide a justification, otherwise we reserve the right to penalize you as we see fit. Please provide your explanations today; we’ll start penalizing tomorrow. It’s in the VSP rules, fucktards, and your DNF Swap screen even reminds you that the Piti Priniciple applies.

    The Changing of the Picks rules are designed to promote fair play and keep the competition fun and open throughout the three-week race. Abuse of these rules will be managed through the “Piti Principle”: if we we feel you are attempting to exploit loopholes or otherwise take advantage of the Changing of the Picks rules, we will penalize you by deducting points from your total score. Much like the UCI doping suspensions, the amount of points deducted will be based on how egregious the abuse was.

    For additional clarity to my previously iPhone auto-corrected mess of a question: The question is whether we should allow for DNF swaps at all, or if we limit ourselves entirely to Rest-Day swaps (understanding from the above that if there are DNF swaps, you technically have to be able to swap them all, provided you explain yourself.)

    The case of Scarponi is a great justification of why to eliminate it, the first week of the Tour is a great justification for why it’s handy.

    The alternative being that The Keepers just go ahead and use our discretion as to wether to allow for a DNF swap; if it’s a douchey move like Scarps then no, if it’s a sitch like Wiggo busting up his collarbone in a crash he didn’t cause then yes.

    @scaler911
    You didn’t have Scaponi in your picks, that’s why you couldn’t make changes to your lineup.

  8. @frank

    Totally agree that multiple swaps require serious justification. In my defence re the Scarponi swap, I was merely predicting Fulsgang’s departure from the top five (or ten or whatever).

    In the event that it might still be considered an inappropriate move, I’ll go and climb a big hill tomorrow

  9. Good God almighty, I’m knackered, think I’ll have to go to bed early – almost glad we only saw Wiggo start to crack, would have been to painful to watch anymore of that 20+% stuff – that’s gotto be one of the nastiest climbs of the year – fair play to Cobo, looks like he got the gearing right, but how come everyone else was completely spannered, yet he looked like he was on a training ride? Everyone was doing squares and zig zags and he just powered up the middle of the track – Contador maybe, but an unknown….. (just feeling a bit sorry for Brad I guess…)

  10. @frank
    too complicated with all the swapping stuff – should only be for crash induced withdrawals, coz that’s hardcore – pulling out with sore legs or a headcold shouldn’t count – a hole in your ballbag would be cause for consideration mind you!!

  11. @frank
    Frank: As per swaps, my feel is no swaps under ANY circumstance. If you’re riding and a horse jumps out of the side of the road and ruins your race, it sucks to be you, HTFU (like Museeuw in Ghent-Wevelgem).

    And as for why I switched out Anton for JiPM, I REALLY think JiPM is about to peak. :)

  12. That’s natural justice. I made blatant points-grabbing changes at the first rest day, and now I have no one scoring anything.

    I support the zero change movement – you pays your money (metaphorically speaking) and you takes your chances.

    Go Kloedi!!

  13. @Dr C

    @frank too complicated with all the swapping stuff – should only be for crash induced withdrawals, coz that’s hardcore – pulling out with sore legs or a headcold shouldn’t count – a hole in your ballbag would be cause for consideration mind you!!

    Is that your professional opinion Doc ?

  14. @ChrisO

    Sorry but that’s f*cking outrageous.
    An ‘extra-terreste’ performance by a rider from out of the blue…… in a squad managed by a man whose claim to fame (apart from Liege-Bastogne-Liege) was spending 10 days in hospital suspected of a doping transfusion…… whose previous job was managing the team which included Piepoli and Ricco.
    Add it up people.

    Wonder if Cyclingnews agrees: “It paved the way for Cobo, who eased through the remnants of the leading group as if they were standing still. It was also Riis-esque, with Wiggins only able to mount a valiant challenge for few hundred meters.”

  15. The pics of Twiggo on today’s stage show a man holding onto his bike for dear life. He also looks like a British grandma when he’s on his limit. FACT.

  16. @G’phant

    There are a few carefully worded reports out there.

    According to one set of figures Cobo climbed the last, most difficult 5.5km (up to the part where it descends to the finish) 8 seconds faster than Contador in 2008.

    His power to weight ratio for the whole climb (11.5km) was 6.2 W/kg and his VAM 1826. (1194m in 39m 13sec)

    To put that in perspective, it’s higher than Pantani’s when he broke the record on Alpe d’Huez.

    Makes you wonder why he waited until he was 30 years old to reveal that he is not only one of the world’s greatest climbers but a Grand Tour winner to boot.

    If we have learned two things from recent cycling history they are:

    1. Be enormously suspicious about people who suddenly show form and figures that they have not previously produced. Cobo has only once finished top ten in a grand tour, in 2009.

    2. Associations matter – people riding on dirty teams, with dirty doctors and dirty directeurs who ride in a way that is too good to be true, are probably not true. Cobo’s previous best ? The 2008 Tour when he won the stage from Pau to Hautacam riding in the Saunier-Duval team with Piepoli and Ricco. Saunier-Duval was managed by Mauro Gianetti who now runs the Geox team.

    When people fit into both those categories you’d have to believe in Father Christmas and the Tooth Fairy to take it at face value.

    I would have similar suspicion of Chris Froome but the exceptions are that he is younger and on the way up in terms of races and teams. He also doesn’t have the associations, something which Sky have been extremely careful about (unlike Green Edge, for the Aussies ;-) ).

  17. @ChrisO
    interesting stuff Chris – if I had seen anyone else straightlining it up the crowd festooned section of 24%, fair enough – but when one person with massive thighs blasts up like that without fatiguing visibly, it seems a little odd – witness Contador et al in the TdF this year, they all blew up eventually

    I’m trying to remain objective whilst feeling really sorry for Brad, as he was the most fucked rider at the end of each stage over the last week, nobody seemed to give more, then this happens…..maybe we should ask the same of Froome indeed, especially after his amazing TT….

    Anyway, I think Brad was awesome and clean and I love him all the more for what he is doing – still a week to go, but can’t see the chances anywhere, unless Cobo falls off I guess – great drama though – my 8 year old has even started watching it!!

  18. @Chris @Buck Rogers
    re P-R – I suspect I will have to give it a miss in 2012, maybe look at it the year after – Trans Pyrenee will be a ballbreaker, so lots of hills will be needed rather than a flat sportif and loads a beer watching the dust racing

    defo have to do it sometime though

  19. @Frank et al

    I had Scarponi at number 5 and when he abandoned I swapped all five of my selections (like the side note said I could).
    Like many heartless rule benders before me, I have proven to be a double loser because I’m still nowhere in the VSP!
    Please make my penalty severe so it may serve as an example to others.
    Forgive me Merckx for I have sinned.

  20. Did anyone else spot this quote from Nibali in Cycling news, “Yes, he hasn’t ridden like that since the Tour stage at Hautacam in 2008.” (finished with Michael Cera and Piepoli) Ouch.

    No changes for me. I’m sticking to my guns.

    Besides, if I make more changes my penalties will kill me anyway.

    What a race.

  21. Boy, black shoes and black socks look terrible. Might make sense for mtn. or cross where there is mud, but c’mon now. It look crap when racing road bikes.

    Then again, not much looks good in the Geox camp…

    What brake caliper is Cobo using? Looks to be a BMX brake.

  22. @Ron
    I ride with black shoes and black socks. I think it looks better than yellow or red, which were my other shoe color options. The Geox-TMC kit is horrid though. Looks more like some race car festooned with haphazardly placed branding, rather than a kit with a unified design.

  23. @Harminator

    @Frank et al
    I had Scarponi at number 5 and when he abandoned I swapped all five of my selections (like the side note said I could).Like many heartless rule benders before me, I have proven to be a double loser because I’m still nowhere in the VSP!Please make my penalty severe so it may serve as an example to others.Forgive me Merckx for I have sinned.

    I must say Harminator, you are a credit to yourself and your Nation – not only are you suffering in the VSP, you want more suffering heaped upon your sorry ass – good man yerself!!
    Just a suggestion – hill repeats with no shoes and the saddle removed – should suffice

    VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Twiglets
    2. Nibbles
    3. Scampi and Chips
    4. Dan Martini, shaken not swigged
    5. Granittoo (crappy anagram)

  24. VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Twiglets
    2. Nibbles
    3. Fuckslang
    4. Dan Martini, shaken not swigged
    5. Granittoo (crappy anagram)

  25. Since Scarponi abandonded, I believe I am allowed to swap him out.

    VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Froome
    2. Braddly Wiggo
    3. Niboli
    4. JVDB
    5. D. Moreno

  26. I am a bit confused now on the rest-day-swap feature. Is replacing, for example, Nibali with Cobo against the VSP rules, Rule V, unsporting, or just in bad taste since Cobo may be frequenting Clentador’s butcher? I notice no one has chosen this option.

  27. @ChrisO

    He also doesn’t have the associations, something which Sky have been extremely careful about (unlike Green Edge, for the Aussies ;-) ).

    Not sure Sky have been as careful as you might think. DS Sean Yates isn’t exactly a cleanskin (he has gone pos before)…

    By the way, you English people do realise that the owner of Sky is an Australian?

  28. I’ll take the hit on one swap.

    VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Nibbles
    2. Froome
    3. Wiggins
    4. J-Rod
    5. Mensch

  29. Wiggins looks like shite all the time.

    Tall socks + long sleeves + string bean body on the bike = uninspiring.

    Stupid hair + hair “burns” + velvet suit off the bike = dickish.

    Oh, and I didn’t even mention his TT helmet. That sucks too.

  30. Collin – I think it’s a 50/50 world; you either like black shoes or you like white.

    If you look down when you are pulling for some V power and your black shoes + black socks look awesome, ride that!

    I need white for V power.

    One can look awesome in either get-up!

  31. VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. cobo
    2. froome
    3. Mollema
    4. van den broke
    5. Wiggo

  32. @Ron

    Wiggins looks like shite all the time.
    Tall socks + long sleeves + string bean body on the bike = uninspiring.
    Stupid hair + hair “burns” + velvet suit off the bike = dickish.
    Oh, and I didn’t even mention his TT helmet. That sucks too.

    gotta disagree there Ron. Wiggins looks fucking fantastic riding an IP. It is his Australian roots that help him look that good on the track.

    And what would you know anyway BoatShoeBoy?

  33. @Marcus

    Maybe but he’s not quite on the level of Neil Stephens is he (who Sky wouldn’t hire).

    I think you’ll find the owner of Team Sky is an American.

    And technically I’m also Australian, at least that’s what one of my passports says ;-) I just haven’t lived there for a long time – nearly 20 years now. I’d sell Rupert my spot if he made me a decent offer.

  34. Can Cobo hold on? Heck if I know, but with Menchov playing domestique I like his chances, and I really have no other play having already swapped out Scarps and Igor on rest day one.

    VSP PICKS (2nd Rest Day Swaps):

    1. Cobo
    2. Wiggins
    3. Mollema
    4. J Rod
    5. Menchov

  35. History suggests if I make any rest day swap my new picks will be just as crap as my old ones, so I’ll save Frank the bother of mapping more useless picks. Is there an “abandon” button? Fuck.

  36. @Ron
    re-Wiggo
    – clearly I am Wiggo’s no1 fan, but I think you have a point – his dress sense is a bit whacky at times – just needs a little tweak – a bit like a Mini should have the Union Flag/Jack on it’s roof removed on delivery

    that said, I also find TTs really tedious, but I could watch Wiggo all day on his slippy way – ignoring his outfit, he is the embodiment of supersmooth, abit like Spartacus, once you’ve turned the heavy bass beat off

    Go Wiggo, ya fricken wierdo!!

  37. @ChrisO
    1. I was only rebutting your comment that Sky have been “very careful not to” employ riders with “a past”.

    2. With reference to Neil Stephens specifically , I think you will find that Dave Brailsford has admitted to having talks with him about coming on board with Sky. The difference between Yates and Stephens is that one has actually tested positive and one has admitted to taking EPO (“unknowingly”…). Which is the cleaner rider?

    3. As to Murdoch, that was just a passport thingy to get around some US ownership laws. Rupey is an Aussie through and through, just like Twiggo is really a Belgian…

  38. @ Oli

    Oli, do you remember you posted a french video of the Tour de France in the 70s/80s, the one with the guy slowly cycling to a standstill and falling in a ditch, and the dudes on the motorcycles all getting wankered as the TdF riders ran into the local shops to have their way with the owner’s daughters??

    Can you link it again – I can’t find it, and it was priceless – couple of mates keen to view it

    Cheers

  39. @Chris

    @frank
    In the event that it might still be considered an inappropriate move, I’ll go and climb a big hill tomorrow

    Gave the matter some consideration while climbing yesterday and I didn’t really come to any great conclusions (possibly due to oxygen starvation) other than if any swaps are to be made, it should only really be the DNF that can be swapped out. As far as whether DNF swaps should be allowable, it’s a hard one. On the one hand DNF’s as a result of a big crash come across as being more legit than simple retirements, it isn’t always as cut and dried as that in that we don’t really know what the reasons behind the retirements are and how much pain has been endured to that point. I would be reasonably confident that there aren’t too many VSP contenders that simply give up. It also seems to me that where the race in question is where the riders are able to stay in contention by changing wheels and bikes etc, then it is not unreasonable for us to make VSP swaps.

    The other subjects given consideration while climbing were much more basic concepts such as surely the end must be round the next corner, wtf are people on ablout when the talk about going sur la plaque on climbs and thank fuck I’ve given up smoking! As time went on I did find my mind emptying and subconsciously I did, on occasion, move to a smaller cog.

  40. @Chris
    good points, but surely pulling out of the race is the same as doing badly – a full on face plant with fractures seems the only reason to stop that is beyond one’s control, or getting run over by the Commissaire’s Skoda

    Sur la Plaque seems to be a state of mind, somedays you can, if you are full of testosterone and in a group, but sometimes you can’t…..but then you can control your mind, so the day becomes irrelevant

    Are you back from Espagne yet? Did you shave your legs?

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