Categories: Technology

Fixie Challenge: Matching Aptitude to Confidence

I think it goes without saying that riding a fixie properly takes quite a bit of skill and finesse; the pedals being directly connected to the rear axle demands a fluid pedaling technique when riding at speed, not to mention the skill required to stop (quickly) without brakes.  The issue I have with the fixie community is not so much the bike as it is with the silliness of riding a single speed in a city overrun with long, steep hills.  For the most part, it means people are choosing this vehicle for its form rather than its function; the result is a preponderance of people who lack the skill to handle such a machine.

Not long ago, we were sitting in traffic in downtown Seattle.  Sitting in traffic is what we do in downtown Seattle, and people commonly ride their bike instead since commuting by bike during rush hour is much more sensible than doing so by car.  As we poked along, I noticed a guy weaving through traffic.  The rider was adorned in typical fixie garb: messenger bag, tight jeans, enormous belt buckle. As he approached, the erratic nature to his motion belied his misplaced confidence in his skills.  He seemed to be enjoying the responsiveness of his bike and was whipping around cars as he picked his path along.  But there was a problem: he was over-steering and his efforts to stop his bike were overstated; he lacked the subtlety of a skilled rider but rode with an aplomb that goes hand-in-glove with someone whose aptitude doesn’t quite match their attitude.

I held my breath as he passed our car.  He veered to the right and then quickly to the left before falling over onto the trunk of a beautiful, black Mercedes just in front and to the right of us.  Owing to the nature of his fixed gear, his bike continued moving forward and his body lay limply and ineffective over the car as his belt buckle scraped a clean, uninterrupted gouge along the length of the car’s gleaming, black body.  He moved his arms down to try to push against the car, searching in vain for purchase to slow his movement.  He tried to pull his feet from his pedals but was unable to, thanks to his feet being secured by a set of cool, double-strap toe clips.  Finally, he alighted upon the rear-view mirror which detached from the car’s body with a sickening crunch before he came to his feet just in front of the car, grimly facing the driver whose dismembered mirror he held like a football.

Traffic started moving again at this point so we didn’t get the opportunity to see how the interaction between the driver and Fixie played out, but the manner in which he stood fidgeting with the wires that dangled from the dismembered mirror, face agog at what had just transpired didn’t bode well for his negotiating position.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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  • The damn kids with their double track straps. They are bringing down the bar for the Jim Thomsons of the fixed gear world. In the Northeast that kid would get a pistol whipping. I bet he has no idiot insurance.
    I love stories like this, Frank. That one photo says it all and it makes my blood pressure go up.
    "get thee on a track ye little poser*"

    *substitute "tosser" or "pussy" here

  • @john
    I have to say, I respect that Northeast mentality of, "I hereby shoot you for the crime of High Sucking." People in the Northwest are altogether too accepting of one another. A little dose of judgment is helpful for making you think twice before being a giant tool.

  • Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha, that's the funniest shit ever!

    You should've hung around to see what happened to the stupid sack of shit when the driver got to him.

    I bet he wished he had a brake after that.

    Giant tools don't have judgement, that's a contributing factor to why they are giant tools.

  • Perhaps the said giant tool would have better served the Mercedes driving public by starting with the freewheel side of a flip flop hub, a hand brake, big BMX platform pedals, and suspenders.

  • @Marko
    My second grade education level always reminds me of Pearl Jam's song, Dissonance, whenever I see that term.

  • I'm all for getting more people on bikes. Fixed gear bikes with no brakes gotta be the worst choice for all hipsters looking to start riding.

    I think some of the bikes look cool - just use a single speed with brakes though. Makes way more sense.

    Email from a friend of mine (ex road racer) awhile back...

    "Speaking of cars and bikes, I had a freaky car accident back in October. We were driving in NYC near the West Side Highway, going through a green light when a cyclist blasts into my left front fender landing on my windshield. He said he didn't notice the red light on his street. He was very lucky, didn't get hurt or do any damage to his fixed gear road bike. I don't know how those guys can ride fixed gear bikes in city traffic, but you see them all the time. He did smash my windshield , but I was glad he was okay."

  • @Dan O
    Une velo sans le brakes is designed for one thing: the track. And even then, I bet these guys would have liked to have a set:

    Even the the Jim Thomsons of the fixed gear world, as John pointed out, have the sense to mount an "oh shit" brake.

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