Categories: EtiquetteKitLa Vie VelominatusLook ProTradition

Lock, Sock, and Two Smoking Barrels

Classic witte socks

It used to be that you could choose any color shoes you wanted, so long as they were black and any color socks, so long as they were white. Easy times, those. Then Gianni gave me his White Ladies and all of a sudden my life was complicated.

First of all, the shoes were so beautifully white in their gleaming patent leather that only the whitest of white socks looked white enough. Wear them twice and into the “rain sock” pile they went. The real “rain socks” were even worse, because they were actually dingy and I simply couldn’t deal with the contrast. So then I started wearing black socks in bad weather. Fortunately, white shoes with black socks looks much better than you’d think, although it looks worse than white on white or black on white.

So then I was changing sock color depending on the weather.

The great thing about a pair of White Ladies with white socks is it turns the foot/ankle into a single visual unit, almost like a perpetual pair of overshoes, and everyone knows overshoes always look rad. Very good for motivation when the V-Bank is running a little low on funds.

Then I got my custom orange Bonts, and things really became a mess. Somehow, the extra orange means I have to match my socks to my jersey, otherwise it all looks out of balance; white socks with the Witte jersey, and black socks with the Zwarte jersey. Which is practical because I always wear black in the rain.

But what about that perpetual overshoe look for which I’ve declared my undying love? Orange socks and orange shoes, is it too much? Apparently the answer to that question depends on my mood and how tan my guns are, because I really dug it yesterday but some days I can’t take it because it might be a tad too fluoro. Except I’m kind of liking fluoro again.

So now I’m matching my socks to my jersey unless I match them to my shoes. To make matters worse, my socks are a bit long, I’m afraid. But with my tan line in full swing, I’m committed to the length for the remainder of the season at least. At which point I’ll probably like the sock length.

Somebody call a doctor.

frank

The founder of Velominati and curator of The Rules, Frank was born in the Dutch colonies of Minnesota. His boundless physical talents are carefully canceled out by his equally boundless enthusiasm for drinking. Coffee, beer, wine, if it’s in a container, he will enjoy it, a lot of it. He currently lives in Seattle. He loves riding in the rain and scheduling visits with the Man with the Hammer just to be reminded of the privilege it is to feel completely depleted. He holds down a technology job the description of which no-one really understands and his interests outside of Cycling and drinking are Cycling and drinking. As devoted aesthete, the only thing more important to him than riding a bike well is looking good doing it. Frank is co-author along with the other Keepers of the Cog of the popular book, The Rules, The Way of the Cycling Disciple and also writes a monthly column for the magazine, Cyclist. He is also currently working on the first follow-up to The Rules, tentatively entitled The Hardmen. Email him directly at rouleur@velominati.com.

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frank says:

Jul 11 2015 at 4:16 pm

@Mikael Liddy

@Frank here’s the solution when you’re wanting the overshoe look.

http://www.velotoze.com/products/tall-shoe-cover?variant=4622260483

Even better:
unversio says:

Jul 11 2015 at 5:19 pm

@frank

Biohazard booties.
Minnesota Expat says:

Jul 11 2015 at 8:13 pm

All this orange stuff, talk of matching socks, shoes, jerseys, helmet, glasses, gloves, jersey, shorts/bibs, and those boots or booties or whatever, remind me of a time that most agreed this was a bad day for Nairo Quintana.
ChrisO says:

Jul 11 2015 at 8:23 pm

@Minnesota Expat

Hear hear.

Matching colours doesn't mean the same as going together.

If you're wearing an outfit you should be on your way to a Cosplay convention, not a bike ride.
tessar says:

Jul 12 2015 at 12:50 am

@frank

@tessar

I love my Mavics. I love white shoes with just enough bits of black and yellow to make any white sock work, but without clashing every other colour.

I love socks, and I love them long. 6-inch or death!

Now you’re getting ahead of yourself!

That chart only confirms I was right! I've got ~20cm between the top of my ankle and the base of the calf muscle. That means a 6-inch cuff even leaves me a few cm short of Looking Pro.

That being said, while the pros have been rocking some awesome shoes this Tour, the sock choices are beyond awful. Tinkoff's kit-matching grey socks look like they've been ridden in the rain. Too many short cuffs, too many loose fits. Where's Juul-Jensen when you need him?
tessar says:

Jul 12 2015 at 12:57 am

@wilburrox

Speshy shoes and Mavics are two brands I can order a certain size and just know they’ll fit. I have more than a few pair of both. The Audax shoes vs s-works are two different shoes as Audax simply has more volume for same size. The s-works fit like exam gloves. I love ’em and can wear ’em all day long but I’m not gonna shove a thick wool socked foot in to them. The Audax? No problem. Plenty of volume. Also, if you’re a fan of custom footbeds, you might be better off with the larger volume Audax. I’ve left strd bed in s-works (its fine) as no room for a fi'zi:k bed I’ve also used. The boa enclosures are cool and easy enough though I get along just fine with ratchet straps too. I’ve yet to try the modern lace up shoes.

So Audax are the same length (with more volume) as equivalent S-Works? Amazing. Tried a friend's S-Works 5 shoes and they were far too narrow - even compared to my Mavics, which everyone says are stupid-narrow but I've been happy with they. According to Spesh, the gen-6 shoes (S-Works boa and Sub-6 laces) are wider in the toe-box and narrower in the heel compared to outgoing models - which sounds like a "Mavic-ized" shoe. Can't wait.

I admire companies that are meticulous about consistency. I've tried four pairs of road Mavics and two MTB models and all had exactly the same fit. I can ride my Zxellium on one foot and my Helium on the other and not even know the difference. That said, they're definitely on the racier side of things so there's no space for winter socks...
VeloJello says:

Jul 12 2015 at 2:51 am

@frank

@VeloJello

Not bad; is that helmet custom painted?

Thanks. No, it's a limited edition Northwave Speedster (as worn but in full orange by the CCC Sprandi Polska chaps).
VeloJello says:

Jul 12 2015 at 2:55 am

@Mikael Liddy

Those look amaze-balls! Will be ordering post haste...
VeloJello says:

Jul 12 2015 at 3:00 am

@ChrisO

@Minnesota Expat

Hear hear.

Matching colours doesn’t mean the same as going together.

If you’re wearing an outfit you should be on your way to a Cosplay convention, not a bike ride.

I was...
wilburrox says:

Jul 12 2015 at 5:20 am

@tessar

Mavics I wear are labeled 47 1/3 (yea, 1/3) and Spesh's are 46.5 w. Yes, agree the Spesh's are narrow and note I wear the wide versions.