The Bikes

The Bike. It is the central tool in pursuit of our craft. A Velominatus meticulously maintains their bicycles and adorns them with the essential, yet minimal, accoutrement. The Rules specify the principles of good taste in configuration and setup of our machines, but within those principles lies almost infinite room for personal taste.

It seems in some ways like a kind of Stockholm Syndrome, the way we honor our machines. We love them to a point that lies well beyond obsession. Upon these machines upon we endure endless suffering, but also find an unending pleasure. The rhythm, the harmony between rider and machine, the outdoors, the wind in our faces and air in our lungs.

The Bikes is devoted entirely to our machines. Ours, The Keepers, and yours, the Community. It features articles devoted to our bikes, and proves a forum for uploading photos of your own machines for discussion. We will be harsh, but fair; this is a place to enforce and enhance our observation of The Rules.

If you’d like to submit an article about your own beloved bike, please feel free to send it to us and we’ll do our best to work with you to include it.

  • Rule #12 and the Cascade EffectRule #12 and the Cascade Effect
    That is a very reasonable opening salvo for the Rule about bike ownership. Three is good and certainly a minimum, and we are talking road bikes here, if there was any doubt. They naturally become ordered: the #1 is ichi-ban, top dog, go-to bike for every and all rides. #2 was the old #1, ...
  • Guest Article: Black Is Not The New BlackGuest Article: Black Is Not The New Black
     @kogalover is singing my song here. Bikes are beautiful. ’nuff said. VLVV, Gianni With all those posts on riding in winter and being visible, either by putting Eyes of Sauron or other car melting devices on one’s steed, or by even considering a YJA instead of donning plain black kit, it was about time to finally get ...
  • Dialing in the StableDialing in the Stable
    This was going to be an article about Rule #45. It is amazing how much time is wasted and matches burned when professionals stop for that second bike change to get back on their #1. With all the jigs available to team mechanics it would seem they could set up five bikes exactly the same. And ...
  • Matching the drapes to the rugMatching the drapes to the rug
    As a longtime titanium bike owner, I’ve always been jealous of a beautiful painted frame but Ti and carbon frames don’t need paint like a steel frame needs paint. But I want some painted beauty. It’s like buying a white car; I can’t do white, need some color. So between a Ti frame and a ...
  • Festum Prophetae: Waiting for the HourFestum Prophetae: Waiting for the Hour
    Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth. – Mike Tyson The one thing everyone should always plan for is that however well-conceived a program might be, things will never go to plan. The high level plan for my Festum Prophetae Hour Ride was as follows: Have a custom Hour Bike built by Don Walker. Because reasons. Reasons like custom ...

15,871 Replies to “The Bikes”

  1. @Teocalli

    @RobSandy

    New daft mechanical alert – Set off on my commute this morning on my alloy Felt F75. At the first set of traffic lights I pulled away and something ‘lurched’. I pulled over and looked down to see that my left hand crank had slipped on the BB spindle. I’d forgotten to tighten the pinch bolts on the crank.

    I popped home and managed to get it off using some amount of brute force and persistence, and put it back on correctly.

    All seems fine, my question is though, what damage may I have done to the crank, BB spindle or BB itself?

    Obviously by having it slip I might have damaged the splines on the BB spindle and on the inside of the crank, but it fitted back on nicely enough.

    My bike felt like crap this morning, but that might be due to what was sitting on it, rather than a problem with the bike.

    0

    Visual inspection of the splines should be able to tell you if it is damaged. Any damage is likely to be confined to the ends of the spline so once fully engaged it is likely to be OK assuming you have not crunched a mash of broken splines into the whole thing……….

    Though if it all went in easily it is most likely fine.

    It’s funny how things seem to ride better after a bit of TLC and conversely feel crap after some negative TLC even though mechanically it is all as it was before.

    0

    They looked fine and felt normal when I put it back on in the right place. Plus, I imagine once it’s in place it’s the compression of the pinch bolts that holds it, rather than the splines engaging.

    Just when I started riding pedaling felt really hard…like there was some drag around the BB. But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.

  2. @RobSandy

    But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.

    0

    Always a dangerous place to go visiting…………

    Though you could check by dropping your chain off the chainring and see how freely the cranks spin.

  3. @Teocalli

    @RobSandy

    But I’ve felt that before and it turned out to be all in my mind.

    0

    Always a dangerous place to go visiting…………

    Though you could check by dropping your chain off the chainring and see how freely the cranks spin.

    0

    Bike and rider both fine. I may have slightly over torqued the main crank bolt, but you’d have thought as it’s only ‘finger tight’ that wouldn’t really be possible. I set some PR’s on the way home so it clearly wasn’t a problem.

  4. Rode with the local chaingang at Lusail MotoGP circuit this evening. The plan was a swift 85 km in the two and a half hours the track was open to cyclists. Everything was going to plan, the average speed was a bit high, about 35 kph, until I punctured just after an hour.

    I think I’d jinxed myself. It was supposed to be the first ride on my new deep section tubulars but when it came to swapping out the brake pads to the carbon specific pads the screws holding the rear pads in were seized.  I’d already swapped the front pads and I knew it was wrong but I thought “fuck it, the main aero benefit is in the front wheel” so went with miss matched wheels. Not just a deep section on the front and a relative shallow rear but a tubular on the front and a clincher on the rear.

    Someone must have been looking down from Mount Velomis and decreed it to be Anti-V.

    To add insult to injury it was the front that went. I’d only just glued the thing on!

    There’s a lesson in there somewhere.

  5. @chris

    I  would have bought a spare set of brake shoes and swapped the whole thing.

    Just saying.

    Do they do crits at that circuit? It’d be mega.

  6. @RobSandy Thanks, sound advice but not particularly helpful. 

    I only got round to doing it shortly before heading over to the circuit. Also parts like that aren’t always the easiest things to get hold of here.

    I think it maybe an issue around the valve stem so I’m hoping it’s the extender and not a repair job on the tubular. Still at best I’ll have to pull the tyre off, sort it and re-glue it. I’m out of glue and you can’t buy it here.

    They have held crits on the circuit. They’re more regularly held on between the two roundabouts on the service road to the west. I haven’t raced in one yet but will do when the season starts up again. At the moment it’s Zwift racing. I’ve got my first race tonight.

    Relive ‘Lusail Chaingang – Punctured’

  7. @chris

    I didn’t think you’d thank me for it.

    It was my plan for my new race bike; have 2 wheelsets, one with allow rims and one with exalith rims, and swap the whole brake block/shoe part over.

    Then I realised I was being stupid, any time I wanted to ride that bike I’d want the nice wheels, and I could put the Nr.2 wheelset on my Nr.2 bike and simplify everything.

    Good luck with your Zwift race and any crits you do.

    I’ve been doing well this season, in that I’ve been consistently finishing top 10, and also badly in that I’ve not managed to finish higher than 5th yet. I’d really like some wins.

    I had my hardest ever 7th place last week. I attacked with 15 minutes still to race, managed to take one other strong guy with me and we worked and built up a bit of a gap. 3 others bridged and we all pulled hard but the bunch caught us with maybe about 5 minutes left to race.

    However, instead of anyone else coming through, the whole bunch just sat on, and after a couple of guys sat up and peeled off, I ended up on the front. After doing all that work I got the rage, and did a full-on badger snarl and kicked again, forming a new break of 6 guys. I think I actually said’ Fuck ‘Em!’ as I went.

    We almost stayed away again, the bunch came back to us on the last corner and a few guys managed to come around, but I was still up there so went from max effort breakaway mode to full gas sprint.

    On the plus side I managed a new max HR.

  8. @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.

  9. @chris

    I do like the manic wiggles you can generate on Relive https://www.relive.cc/view/1617363384

  10. @chris

    @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.

    0

    It was hideous. But I felt very proud of myself for channelling the Badger during my second attack. I may have actually growled.

    My average power for the last 16 minutes of the race was 340w and that contained at least 5 times where I pushed 1,000w to attack or to sprint. Eyeballs out.

  11. @RobSandy

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    Nice, sounds like proper bleeding from the eyeballs stuff.

    I’ve got two sets of wheels over here, alloy and carbon so it’d probably make sense to have a separate sets of pad holders. I’ll generally ride the carbon tubulars but rely on the alloys when there isn’t an easy option to get home.

    I’m looking forward to the Zwift race. It’s only 23 km so it’ll be quick and brutal. Unabashed details of watts etc. to follow.

    0

    It was hideous. But I felt very proud of myself for channelling the Badger during my second attack. I may have actually growled.

    My average power for the last 16 minutes of the race was 340w and that contained at least 5 times where I pushed 1,000w to attack or to sprint. Eyeballs out.

    0

    Nipple lube. That’s impressive. My knees aren’t warranted above 750w at the moment.

  12. I’ve read with some dismay the state of affairs with the management of this site. Nonetheless while it still lives, behold, my reincarnated ride. Tis an interesting tale to be sure.

    Build blog

  13. @chris

    @RobSandy

    That is a stunning bike.

    I’m not sure I’d want to ride it on the cobbles though.

    0

    I think the steel ride would be fine – but as Brett says, shifting via DT Shifters in a sector is a different matter.

  14. @Teocalli

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    That is a stunning bike.

    I’m not sure I’d want to ride it on the cobbles though.

    0

    I think the steel ride would be fine – but as Brett says, shifting via DT Shifters in a sector is a different matter.

    0

    Image result for hinault roubaix

    RULE V! RULE V!

  15. @Teocalli

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    That is a stunning bike.

    I’m not sure I’d want to ride it on the cobbles though.

    0

    I think the steel ride would be fine – but as Brett says, shifting via DT Shifters in a sector is a different matter.

    0

    I’m sure it would be. Shifting on the cobbles is hard enough with brifters.* An action of last resort as your thighs go into spasm and your cadence plummets.

    *if anything is going drag Frank out of exile, it would be the use of that word.

  16. @RobSandy

    Image result for hinault roubaix

    RULE V! RULE V!

    On 21 mm tyres?

    Have you ridden through the Arenberg? It’s bad enough on 25s, 28s would be better.

    Obviously, I’d draw the line at anything like a CX tyre.

    And let’s not forget that the Badger only raced it twice. He was fourth on his first attempt, won it on the second before declaring

    Paris Roubaix est une connerie!

     

  17. @chris

     

    *if anything is going drag Frank out of exile, it would be the use of that word.

    0

    I’ve tried to anger him out of exile by the flagrant use of emoticons, but it didn’t work.

  18. @MangoDave

    @

    That is really cool. I remember him discussing the project here.

    @BuckRogers if you’re still out there, what’s with the TA Competition inner chainring?

    0

    Oh, I believe it’s @Buck Rogers if I want to tag him.

  19. @MangoDave

    @RobSandy

    Oh yes, this needs sharing. Chapeau Buck, chapeau Brett.

    http://chainslapmag.com/2018/06/insider-rides-bucks-hinault-custom/

    0

    That is really cool. I remember him discussing the project here.

    @BuckRogers if you’re still out there, what’s with the TA Competition inner chainring?

    0

    This is what he had to say about it on the ChainSlap Facebook page:

    I have the original Campag SR 42 inner ring but I wanted to drop down to a 39 but the smallest that you can get is a 41 made by Specialites TA, an old French company that has been around since the ’40’s. Not sure when they started making 41’s but I am pretty sure it is peroid correct (and my knees are thankful even for one less tooth, esp with the largest rear cog a 25!!!).

  20. @MangoDave

    @chris

    *if anything is going drag Frank out of exile, it would be the use of that word.

    0

    I’ve tried to anger him out of exile by the flagrant use of emoticons, but it didn’t work.

    0

    I know he’s gone full recluse but that word is the most offensive word in the English language.

    Maybe if we criticise his coding. @frank I Quote or Reply without refreshing the page after each post!

  21. @chris

    @MangoDave

    @chris

    *if anything is going drag Frank out of exile, it would be the use of that word.

    0

    I’ve tried to anger him out of exile by the flagrant use of emoticons, but it didn’t work.

    0

    I know he’s gone full recluse but that word is the most offensive word in the English language.

    Maybe if we criticise his coding. @frank I Quote or Reply without refreshing the page after each post!

    0

    So, back to discussing http://FTP...

  22. @RobSandy

    So, back to discussing http://FTP...

    Form is temporary, class is permanent.

    I never had much class but after a very busy couple of weeks at work including two days of endless meetings in Paris and perhaps half a martini and a glass of sherry more than I should have, it feels like whatever form I had (and any FTPs that go with it) has evaporated.

    It’ll take some work and a lot of hurt but I’m sure it’ll come back as soon quickly as it’s faded. I hope so. I’ll back in the UK  and racing at the weekend and foolishly I thought the Cat 2, 3 & 4 race would be a better bet than the No Cat Newbies race.

    I’ve then got an FTP test the Wednesday after I get back and to make thins worse there’s a one minute power test just beforehand.

     

  23. @Teocalli

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    So, back to discussing http://FTP

    Form is temporary, class is permanent.

    Errrrrr……..

    0

    Man, that thing has to be a bit of a bugger aerodynamically, non? ;-)

    And yes, I’m using an emoticon. Who cares anymore, right?

  24. Today’s ride. Experimenting with 38/58 mixed depth combo Irwin AON TLR wheel set. Just my first time out, but like the ride and think the look is kinda badass. Will have an article on PEZ forthcoming comparing AON TLR 38 to 38/58z

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s Stage 9. Expect G to be wearing yellow and Nibs to move up quite a bit.

  25. @chuckp

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s Stage 9. Expect G to be wearing yellow and Nibs to move up quite a bit.

     

    0

    Though stage 9 is playing in GVA’s domain.

  26. @Teocalli

    @chuckp

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s Stage 9. Expect G to be wearing yellow and Nibs to move up quite a bit.

    0

    Though stage 9 is playing in GVA’s domain.

    0

    Don’t see GVA losing yellow tomorrow But hopefully G can put the hurt on some of the other GC guys.

  27. @RobSandy

    Don’t see GVA losing yellow tomorrow But hopefully G can put the hurt on some of the other GC guys.
    Not unless things are going a bit pear shaped for Porte and he’s given babysitting duties.

     

  28. @chris

    @RobSandy

    Don’t see GVA losing yellow tomorrow But hopefully G can put the hurt on some of the other GC guys.
    Not unless things are going a bit pear shaped for Porte and he’s given babysitting duties.
    0

    No danger of that now. Richie Porte crashed out before the cobbles. Guy has worse luck than Dan Martin.

  29. @Rick

    @chris

    @RobSandy

    Don’t see GVA losing yellow tomorrow But hopefully G can put the hurt on some of the other GC guys.
    Not unless things are going a bit pear shaped for Porte and he’s given babysitting duties.
    0

    No danger of that now. Richie Porte crashed out before the cobbles. Guy has worse luck than Dan Martin.

    0

    Damn. I wonder if I can apply the commentator’s curse to riders not in my VSP picks…

    I’ve never been convinced that he would make the step up from super domestique in a grand tour but his jour sans are getting worse.

    Gutted for him.

  30. @chuckp

    Today’s ride. Experimenting with 38/58 mixed depth combo Irwin AON TLR wheel set. Just my first time out, but like the ride and think the look is kinda badass. Will have an article on PEZ forthcoming comparing AON TLR 38 to 38/58z

    Looking forward to tomorrow’s Stage 9. Expect G to be wearing yellow and Nibs to move up quite a bit.

    0

    It’s not just me. Julian Alaphilippe rode a mixed depth wheel combo to victory today in the first TdF mountain stage. I think maybe I might be at the bleeding edge of a new trend.

  31. Actually, the only reason to use a shallower front wheel is if the wheel isn’t good in heavy crosswinds. From an aerodynamic perspective, the front wheel should be the deeper one.

  32. @fignons barber

    Actually, the only reason to use a shallower front wheel is if the wheel isn’t good in heavy crosswinds. From an aerodynamic perspective, the front wheel should be the deeper one.

    0

    It’s not whether the front wheel per se is good in crosswinds, it’s whether the front wheel for the rider in question is good in crosswinds. Burlier manly men rouleur types can better manhandle deeper dish wheels than lightweight climber types. As the latter, a shallower depth front wheel makes sense from a handling standpoint. The aero gain of a deeper depth rear wheel probably isn’t as much as if it was on the front, but there’s still probably some (marginal) aero gain. And how the air flows off the back of the bike actually matters from an aerodynamic standpoint. So it’s a compromise set up for certain types of riders. The question is whether the weight penalty (in the case of my Irwin wheels, about 115 grams) is worth any aerodynamic gain?

  33. @chris

    @fignons barber

    That’s what I would have thought but now one of the Pros has been seen doing it the Big S will market it and all the muppets will buy in.

    0

    Julian Alaphilippe copied me, so I’ll take credit for the hordes of muppets that follow suit.

  34. @chuckp

    @chris

    @fignons barber

    That’s what I would have thought but now one of the Pros has been seen doing it the Big S will market it and all the muppets will buy in.

    0

    Julian Alaphilippe copied me, so I’ll take credit for the hordes of muppets that follow suit.

    0

    I noticed that and thought Alaphillippe must have had a puncture at some point and got a wheel from neutral service.

    Shows what I know.

  35. @fignons barber

    Actually, the only reason to use a shallower front wheel is if the wheel isn’t good in heavy crosswinds. From an aerodynamic perspective, the front wheel should be the deeper one.

    0

    Nope! Rode 303’s in X-wind, struggled to stay on the road.

    Also when #26 on 303’s, next to the sea, the wind WILL blow over your steed!

    Happy to run AL 24’s on Beach Rd and seeing blinged up 808 riders end up on the wrong side of the road!

  36. @sthilzy

    @fignons barber

    Actually, the only reason to use a shallower front wheel is if the wheel isn’t good in heavy crosswinds. From an aerodynamic perspective, the front wheel should be the deeper one.

    0

    Nope! Rode 303’s in X-wind, struggled to stay on the road.

    Also when #26 on 303’s, next to the sea, the wind WILL blow over your steed!

    Happy to run AL 24’s on Beach Rd and seeing blinged up 808 riders end up on the wrong side of the road!

    0

     

    I have no idea what this means.

  37. @fignons barber

    @sthilzy

    @fignons barber

    Actually, the only reason to use a shallower front wheel is if the wheel isn’t good in heavy crosswinds. From an aerodynamic perspective, the front wheel should be the deeper one.

    0

    Nope! Rode 303’s in X-wind, struggled to stay on the road.

    Also when #26 on 303’s, next to the sea, the wind WILL blow over your steed!

    Happy to run AL 24’s on Beach Rd and seeing blinged up 808 riders end up on the wrong side of the road!

    0

    I have no idea what this means.

    0

    Me neither! But Zipp’s are a MF if not chosen well!

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